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-   -   We've Had Enough (https://britishexpats.com/forum/new-zealand-83/weve-had-enough-510390/)

plummyscum Jan 30th 2008 7:14 pm

We've Had Enough
 
Spent a month in NZ last year ostensibly to see some friends who moved to Nelson from the UK.

We've come back to the UK and realised what a toilet the place has become. I'm a civil servant and my wife is a nurse, we both have a very strong service ethos but we also have two kids and cannot see a future here. I am regularly abused at work and my wife is sick of not being able to nurse people to the standard she was taught. We have nothing left over at the end of the month, indeed we often spend more out than comes in, we hardly see one another and when we do, it's only to catch up with sleep!! We work our backsides off and get nowhere.

We will need to work - we will need a mortgage - who cares though when you can live in a beautiful place with lovely people and sense of community.

I envy anyone who has made this move and we can't wait to come over and leave behind the sinking ship that is the UK. 4 hour commutes - dirty hospitals -underfunded public services - crap education and uncontrolled immigration to the benefit of no-one.

I never thought I'd ever say this but I have grown to hate living here.

Anyone else had a similar 'road to Damascus' moment?

simonmarkellis Jan 30th 2008 7:29 pm

Re: We've Had Enough
 

Originally Posted by plummyscum (Post 5860099)
Spent a month in NZ last year ostensibly to see some friends who moved to Nelson from the UK.

We've come back to the UK and realised what a toilet the place has become. I'm a civil servant and my wife is a nurse, we both have a very strong service ethos but we also have two kids and cannot see a future here. I am regularly abused at work and my wife is sick of not being able to nurse people to the standard she was taught. We have nothing left over at the end of the month, indeed we often spend more out than comes in, we hardly see one another and when we do, it's only to catch up with sleep!! We work our backsides off and get nowhere.

We will need to work - we will need a mortgage - who cares though when you can live in a beautiful place with lovely people and sense of community.

I envy anyone who has made this move and we can't wait to come over and leave behind the sinking ship that is the UK. 4 hour commutes - dirty hospitals -underfunded public services - crap education and uncontrolled immigration to the benefit of no-one.

I never thought I'd ever say this but I have grown to hate living here.

Anyone else had a similar 'road to Damascus' moment?

Each and everyone of us!! ;) We've all been there and know exactly how you feel - just got to make sure that the pro's out weigh the con's of such a big move. We certainly don't regret it! How far down the road are you of committing yourself?

happynz Jan 30th 2008 7:36 pm

Re: We've Had Enough
 

Originally Posted by plummyscum (Post 5860099)
Anyone else had a similar 'road to Damascus' moment?

Seeing as how I went to crap schools as a kid I don't quite understand the 'road to Damascus' reference, so I can't say with any confidence if I have or haven't. :o

At any rate, you sound pretty miserable. I hope you get yourselves sorted and if a shift to New Zealand can provide some contentment, go for it.

Good luck.

luvwelly Jan 30th 2008 7:37 pm

Re: We've Had Enough
 

Originally Posted by simonmarkellis (Post 5860165)
Each and everyone of us!! ;) We've all been there and know exactly how you feel - just got to make sure that the pro's out weigh the con's of such a big move. We certainly don't regret it! How far down the road are you of committing yourself?

Speak for yourself.....I still love the UK..don't miss the commute though.

psa2570 Jan 30th 2008 7:37 pm

Re: We've Had Enough
 

Originally Posted by plummyscum (Post 5860099)
Spent a month in NZ last year ostensibly to see some friends who moved to Nelson from the UK.

We've come back to the UK and realised what a toilet the place has become. I'm a civil servant and my wife is a nurse, we both have a very strong service ethos but we also have two kids and cannot see a future here. I am regularly abused at work and my wife is sick of not being able to nurse people to the standard she was taught. We have nothing left over at the end of the month, indeed we often spend more out than comes in, we hardly see one another and when we do, it's only to catch up with sleep!! We work our backsides off and get nowhere.

We will need to work - we will need a mortgage - who cares though when you can live in a beautiful place with lovely people and sense of community.

I envy anyone who has made this move and we can't wait to come over and leave behind the sinking ship that is the UK. 4 hour commutes - dirty hospitals -underfunded public services - crap education and uncontrolled immigration to the benefit of no-one.

I never thought I'd ever say this but I have grown to hate living here.

Anyone else had a similar 'road to Damascus' moment?

Whoa, and i thought it was only me.
You ought to read my little rant on "reasons for moving to NZ" thread, post #95. My missus felt obliged to apologise for me lest someone think i'm a card carrying BNP member or something.
I can fully understand your reasons for wanting out of the UK, I just wasn't as diplomatic as you.
I hope it comes off for you, we want to get out to NZ asap ourselves.
Be good,
Paul.

TeamEmbo Jan 30th 2008 7:41 pm

Re: We've Had Enough
 
Yep! Felt much the same as you. Came for a recce last March. OH had interviews, got job offer. Moved over end of May last year. Never looked back since. Just loving our new life. Not easy, in fact probably most stressful time trying to sort out selling house, visas, closing accounts, paying off debts, selling all surplus stuff, plunging into an uncertain future in a country we'd only ever spent 6 days in, then there's the leaving family and friends. But it always 'felt' right.

You won't get rich on an NZ wage, but like I posted recently on another thread, I don't mind growing our own veg, only buying whats on special at the supermarket and generally living the mend and make do life, as this is where I choose to be and the work/life balance we have is just so much better. We have a house we could only've dreamed of in the UK and access to some beautiful beaches, lakes, rivers, the southern alps and foothills.
We have a huge mortgage but like I said it doesn't get us down like it did in the uk as the lifestyle trade off was worth it in our opinion.

I actually felt at home as soon as we landed and that I could at last live my life. It hasn't been all plain sailing and I certainly don't have rose tinted glasses stuck on my face. Its not all paradise here but somehow that bad bits or downsides seem more easy to handle, probably because we're less stress and laid back! And it was certainly a great move for our kids (11 and then 12).

Hope all works out ok for you. Research all you can to make sure its the right move for you. Like I said its not the land of milk and honey and doesn't suit all but if you've an open mind and willing to live in a new culture and accept the NZ ways you should get on fine.

11ThousandMilesFromHome Jan 30th 2008 7:48 pm

Re: We've Had Enough
 

Originally Posted by plummyscum (Post 5860099)
We have nothing left over at the end of the month, indeed we often spend more out than comes in

Hope the move works out ok for you

i don't want to sound all doom and gloom though but it's not cheap to live here as i thought....this is in reference to your having nothing left at the end of the month.

we've been here19 days and we've probably spent about £3500 on the basics

that's with only buying the essentials and stuff from the salvation army store, we've also loaned stuff off people so we've not had to buy everything. oh and that's not including buying a car, car rental for the first week or even the first few days in a motel before we got our rental sorted.

I still would make the choice to come here but make sure you have enough money to live without getting stressed out because the finances are too stretched

good luck

happynz Jan 30th 2008 7:52 pm

Re: We've Had Enough
 

Originally Posted by 11ThousandMilesFromHome (Post 5860245)

we've been here19 days and we've probably spent about £3500 on the basics

Six months from now when you've got things sussed out more it won't seem like such a financial drain. Getting up to speed does cost a bomb though.

Jude J Jan 30th 2008 7:56 pm

Re: We've Had Enough
 
I liked living in the UK most of the time, with the exception of a year near Sheffield which is where the idea of NZ came up as it is as far away from Sheffield and the horrible town we were living in. Loved other places I lived though.
But...living here is like proper living to me. I wouldn't be anywhere else.

What is your next move then? Have you looked into getting PR?

Lexylou Jan 30th 2008 7:57 pm

Re: We've Had Enough
 
I agree - it is not as cheap as I thought it would be either. I defo came with rose tinted glasses on.

I am always slightly concerned when I read posts about people coming or wanting to come to NZ for the reasons the OP posted, most of these issues will still exist in NZ. Bullying in the work place, I know from a lot of people on here that is quite rife and budgeting will be the normal daily practice unless on a good wage and bringing over lots of cash. You will prob work just as hard, unless one of you stops work altogether.... Hey, not trying to out a downer on things but coming over with real expectations about life (not just NZ - NZ does not all of a sudden mean that you will be happier at work, richer and see more of each other - if it were, I would still be in NZ) Life just aint like that sadly.

There is one valid reason for me to come to NZ and that is the weather! Everything else is just the same, work, life, budget, etc etc same shit different location but I strongly believe that things seem better with the sun shining and being able to get out doors. That is the MAIN plus point for NZ.

chocolate cake Jan 30th 2008 8:58 pm

Re: We've Had Enough
 

Originally Posted by Jude J (Post 5860275)
I liked living in the UK most of the time, with the exception of a year near Sheffield which is where the idea of NZ came up as it is as far away from Sheffield and the horrible town we were living in. Loved other places I lived though.
But...living here is like proper living to me. I wouldn't be anywhere else.

What is your next move then? Have you looked into getting PR?

I'd have to question what your problem with Sheffield is, there's many many worse places to be than Sheffield. Sheffield's got plenty going for it. I live on the edge of Sheffield, can be in the peak district in no time, Lakes and Wales aren't far away. Plenty of good places to eat, not my cup of tea, but it's well catered for by shopping too. Commuting time to work must be better than most cities, and certainly a dream compared to London, and certainly nothing like the daily 4 hours mentioned by the original poster.


Originally Posted by Lexylou (Post 5860279)
..................................
There is one valid reason for me to come to NZ and that is the weather! Everything else is just the same, work, life, budget, etc etc same shit different location but I strongly believe that things seem better with the sun shining and being able to get out doors. That is the MAIN plus point for NZ.

Weather NZ? there's plenty of rain too, the land of 'long white cloud' or whatever appears on Nobilos White Wine isn't there for nothing.

spid Jan 30th 2008 9:00 pm

Re: We've Had Enough
 
Sort of the same really. We just came back to the UK from year in the Falklands. Total population 2500! Shops one or two but not much more. CHoice? Non-existant. ANd i loved it!!!! Shopping in a big Tesco's after we got back? Horrifying, claustrophobic, and the choice was just too overwhelming! The news in the Falklands was brilliant - front page one week 'horse has xray at hospital'. Yes, it wasn't all a bed of roses and i actually wouldn't want to live there forever (a wee bit too small) but . . .

NZ 'seems' to be the place my heart is yearning for and my head is researching so we don't make a huge mistake. ANd sunshine is a great clamer of nerves. I hate these long grey months where the cold seeps along with the damp into your bones.

Everywhere is going to have it's difficulties and it's problems and i know NZ isn't free of them but . . . sometimes it's nice to worry somewhere else. Get my drift?

ANyway, hope it works out.:thumbup:

Jude J Jan 30th 2008 9:07 pm

Re: We've Had Enough
 

I'd have to question what your problem with Sheffield is, there's many many worse places to be than Sheffield. Sheffield's got plenty going for it. I live on the edge of Sheffield, can be in the peak district in no time, Lakes and Wales aren't far away. Plenty of good places to eat, not my cup of tea, but it's well catered for by shopping too. Commuting time to work must be better than most cities, and certainly a dream compared to London, and certainly nothing like the daily 4 hours mentioned by the original poster.

I just didn't like it. Yes, the peak district was beautiful and I went there loads. I dont want to be rude about it as I was only there a year and I appreciate that plenty of people love it.

plummyscum Jan 30th 2008 9:13 pm

Re: We've Had Enough
 

Originally Posted by Jude J (Post 5860702)
I'd have to question what your problem with Sheffield is, there's many many worse places to be than Sheffield. Sheffield's got plenty going for it. I live on the edge of Sheffield, can be in the peak district in no time, Lakes and Wales aren't far away. Plenty of good places to eat, not my cup of tea, but it's well catered for by shopping too. Commuting time to work must be better than most cities, and certainly a dream compared to London, and certainly nothing like the daily 4 hours mentioned by the original poster.



Well, we live in the Peak District and we figure that it's about as good as it can be if you live in the UK but we are still unhappy because of the things I mentioned.

The lack of respect for people in public service is a big thing for us both - not least by our employers who treat us like poo.

I believe you must earn your right to be a citizen - I see too much of our money given away to our own pond scum and any old waif and stray who happens to get lucky and get in.

We've had enough.

The move to NZ is for us and our kids.

Avid Jan 30th 2008 9:20 pm

Re: We've Had Enough
 

Originally Posted by plummyscum (Post 5860742)
I see too much of our money given away to our own pond scum and any old waif and stray who happens to get lucky and get in.


Which, funnily enough, is exactly what most Kiwis would say.



If, unbelievably, they actually decided to express an opinion about something instead of just saying 'awesome' all day


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