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Ways to get by in NZ on $36,000

Ways to get by in NZ on $36,000

Old Nov 3rd 2005, 2:16 pm
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Default Ways to get by in NZ on $36,000

Hello everyone for the first time...its Ron here!,
I suppose you say I am a bit fortunate what with my track record, but I managed to get a job earning $36,000 with the NZ Prison Service. And after reading some posts on this forum I have noticed that all is not well with some of the residents of this great nation who seem just a tad peeved at having to duck and dive just to get by.
Well, being a bit fly myself I thought I would share some of my survival tips with other P.OFF`s on how to survive on a this tight budget.-

1. Walk to work for the first month and then wait for your pay cheque (you should be able to walk 30 miles there and back no problem)
2. When in that first month you feel hungry, resist the temptation to eat...... ( you will feel better for it in the long run ) but if you must, eat off the prisoners hot plate and remember to stuff your pockets full of the stuff for the missus and saucepan lids.
3. Sleep under the stars for that first month and sleep with your mouth open so as to catch rainwater.
4. If early on you feel the need to visit a doctor...DONT. Just find yourself some leeches, still free as I remember, and still popular in modern medicine.
5. When you get paid you MUST buy the following with it;
a. 4 person tent
b. bicycle
c. fishing rod
d. bucket
e. camping cooker
f. puncture repair kit
6. By now you will appreciate all that New Zealand has to offer and not worry about the abject poverty surrounding you. Cheer up all of you. I bet none of you has ever had to live in Prison Quarters like I did.

Got to go now but will be back with more tips later.
Laters Ron
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Old Nov 3rd 2005, 3:43 pm
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Default Re: Ways to get by in NZ on $36,000

Here is a tip

* Turn up at your new found friends house's at TEATIME (if the Kiwis are as friendly as they are meant to be thay will simply give some dinner) *
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Old Nov 3rd 2005, 3:45 pm
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Default Re: Ways to get by in NZ on $36,000

Originally Posted by Honest Ron
Hello everyone for the first time...its Ron here!,
I suppose you say I am a bit fortunate what with my track record, but I managed to get a job earning $36,000 with the NZ Prison Service. And after reading some posts on this forum I have noticed that all is not well with some of the residents of this great nation who seem just a tad peeved at having to duck and dive just to get by.
Well, being a bit fly myself I thought I would share some of my survival tips with other P.OFF`s on how to survive on a this tight budget.-

1. Walk to work for the first month and then wait for your pay cheque (you should be able to walk 30 miles there and back no problem)
2. When in that first month you feel hungry, resist the temptation to eat...... ( you will feel better for it in the long run ) but if you must, eat off the prisoners hot plate and remember to stuff your pockets full of the stuff for the missus and saucepan lids.
3. Sleep under the stars for that first month and sleep with your mouth open so as to catch rainwater.
4. If early on you feel the need to visit a doctor...DONT. Just find yourself some leeches, still free as I remember, and still popular in modern medicine.
5. When you get paid you MUST buy the following with it;
a. 4 person tent
b. bicycle
c. fishing rod
d. bucket
e. camping cooker
f. puncture repair kit
6. By now you will appreciate all that New Zealand has to offer and not worry about the abject poverty surrounding you. Cheer up all of you. I bet none of you has ever had to live in Prison Quarters like I did.

Got to go now but will be back with more tips later.
.
Laters Ron
Wow, thanks Ron. Youve certainly made me feel a lot better
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Old Nov 3rd 2005, 7:08 pm
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Default Re: Ways to get by in NZ on $36,000

We're doing all that here, thought thinks would get better in NZ !!!!!

Sue :scared:
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Old Nov 3rd 2005, 7:23 pm
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Default Re: Ways to get by in NZ on $36,000

Originally Posted by Honest Ron
Hello everyone for the first time...its Ron here!,
I suppose you say I am a bit fortunate what with my track record, but I managed to get a job earning $36,000 with the NZ Prison Service. And after reading some posts on this forum I have noticed that all is not well with some of the residents of this great nation who seem just a tad peeved at having to duck and dive just to get by.
Well, being a bit fly myself I thought I would share some of my survival tips with other P.OFF`s on how to survive on a this tight budget.-

1. Walk to work for the first month and then wait for your pay cheque (you should be able to walk 30 miles there and back no problem)
2. When in that first month you feel hungry, resist the temptation to eat...... ( you will feel better for it in the long run ) but if you must, eat off the prisoners hot plate and remember to stuff your pockets full of the stuff for the missus and saucepan lids.
3. Sleep under the stars for that first month and sleep with your mouth open so as to catch rainwater.
4. If early on you feel the need to visit a doctor...DONT. Just find yourself some leeches, still free as I remember, and still popular in modern medicine.
5. When you get paid you MUST buy the following with it;
a. 4 person tent
b. bicycle
c. fishing rod
d. bucket
e. camping cooker
f. puncture repair kit
6. By now you will appreciate all that New Zealand has to offer and not worry about the abject poverty surrounding you. Cheer up all of you. I bet none of you has ever had to live in Prison Quarters like I did.

Got to go now but will be back with more tips later.
Laters Ron
7. Sell the kiwis Coronation Street story lines - if one more person asks me if Shelley will ever leave Charlie I'll scream!
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Old Nov 3rd 2005, 7:39 pm
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Default Re: Ways to get by in NZ on $36,000

8.Your clients will have more money than you, so take some off them by sellling illicit substances .

9. Use money from 8. to pay off other PO's whose market you've just muscled in on.
 
Old Nov 3rd 2005, 8:06 pm
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Default Re: Ways to get by in NZ on $36,000

10. Don't buy expensive 'ribbed' condoms, just buy an ordinary one and slip a handful of frozen peas inside it before you put it on
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Old Nov 3rd 2005, 9:16 pm
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Default Re: Ways to get by in NZ on $36,000

Love it! Very funny! And so true too!

For the first time since Ive been here, I saw a man standing outside a pub last friday evening having what i assumed was a after work beer. He had a jug of beer that looked like it would hold just over 1 pint, and was pouring it into a tiny wee glass the size of a wine glass.....on his own.

flash git - showing off like that in public!
 
Old Nov 4th 2005, 6:05 am
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Default Re: Ways to get by in NZ on $36,000

Originally Posted by turkeytickler
Love it! Very funny! And so true too!

For the first time since Ive been here, I saw a man standing outside a pub last friday evening having what i assumed was a after work beer. He had a jug of beer that looked like it would hold just over 1 pint, and was pouring it into a tiny wee glass the size of a wine glass.....on his own.

flash git - showing off like that in public!
THAT HAPPENED TO US !!!

Rob and I bought a jug of ale and they gave us two tiny tumblers to drink it with !!!! Boy did we laugh.

Gill and Rob
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Old Nov 4th 2005, 8:20 am
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Default Re: Ways to get by in NZ on $36,000

Me again,
If you are contemplating which airline to use to get to NZ, Malaysia, Air NZ, Emirates, Buddy Holly Airlines ect.........here`s an idea, try the Channel Tunnel!! Its free to walk through at your leisure these days with or without firearms due to the UK Goverments high security measures. I would however suggest that you take a gun or two with you as your ongoing journey through France and beyond may be just a tincey wincey bit tricky. Once you get a good brisk walking pace going, you will be in Singapore before you can say " dont take me hostage please mate, I hate George Doubleya as much as the next extremist "
Once in Singapore it is plain sailing to Auckland...literally. And heres the real sting in the tail......Singapore is a stopover for those so-called floating hotels that P&O regularly repair in major ports. You will definatley get a job for the whole family on any of these ships as you can all speak better English than everyone of the three thousand strong crew from the Philippines.
With the money earned on the ship and the saving on the price of the airline ticket, your family of 4 will have enough money to buy a very good groundsheet for that tent I mentioned earlier.
Back later with more useful advice,
Ron
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Old Nov 4th 2005, 8:45 am
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Default Re: Ways to get by in NZ on $36,000

10. This really worked for me yesterday. Take your cute blonde toddler with the blue eyes into the local supermarket..... get him to make cute little sounds and words at everyone.... somebody will stop and ask you how old he is...tell them its his birthday today and they will give you a dollar for him to spend! Pocket it yourself as toddler doesnt know what money is yet!
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Old Nov 4th 2005, 8:53 am
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Default Re: Ways to get by in NZ on $36,000

Originally Posted by SarahB
10. This really worked for me yesterday. Take your cute blonde toddler with the blue eyes into the local supermarket..... get him to make cute little sounds and words at everyone.... somebody will stop and ask you how old he is...tell them its his birthday today and they will give you a dollar for him to spend! Pocket it yourself as toddler doesnt know what money is yet!
youve found someone with a spare dollar??? jeez i didnt see that on the news
 
Old Nov 4th 2005, 8:55 am
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Default Re: Ways to get by in NZ on $36,000

Originally Posted by SarahB
10. This really worked for me yesterday. Take your cute blonde toddler with the blue eyes into the local supermarket..... get him to make cute little sounds and words at everyone.... somebody will stop and ask you how old he is...tell them its his birthday today and they will give you a dollar for him to spend! Pocket it yourself as toddler doesnt know what money is yet!
11. Rent out your toddler to other expats!
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Old Nov 4th 2005, 9:00 am
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Default Re: Ways to get by in NZ on $36,000

Originally Posted by bookemjano
11. Rent out your toddler to other expats!
LOL.... what a great idea!!
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Old Nov 4th 2005, 9:07 am
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Default Re: Ways to get by in NZ on $36,000

Originally Posted by SarahB
10. This really worked for me yesterday. Take your cute blonde toddler with the blue eyes into the local supermarket..... get him to make cute little sounds and words at everyone.... somebody will stop and ask you how old he is...tell them its his birthday today and they will give you a dollar for him to spend! Pocket it yourself as toddler doesnt know what money is yet!
Thats the spirit Sarah, you see, its not all doom and gloom is it. When I get to Wellington I am going to put my children (10 and 11) to work on the Kapiti Coast. From a previous post I have found an opening for a thriving business venture. I will make a pig pen and put a boar and sow in it and wait for mother nature to make me a small fortune. When after a few months loads of little piglets are running all over the place I will buy a mincing machine so that the kids can produce top quality sausages. This family run concern will guarantee that only the finest quality ingredients of snouts, tails, trotters, internal organs, and cartilage will be used.
We will call these tasty sausages---KAPITI KORKERS!
Keep up the positive attitude Sarah.
Ron
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