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-   -   UK to NZ for the Kids (https://britishexpats.com/forum/new-zealand-83/uk-nz-kids-516292/)

jads Feb 22nd 2008 7:32 am

UK to NZ for the Kids
 
Have any of your kids been devastated at the thought of going to NZ, did you go anyway and how did they cope once they were there. Did your kids put you off moving.

Cheers Jads

saritabear Feb 22nd 2008 9:01 am

Re: UK to NZ for the Kids
 
Hi,
my kids are 2 (3 in April) and 5 (6 in July) and both are really excited about the prospect. Little one doesn't completely understand whats going on but older one talks about it every day and can't wait for the move. Not even troubled by the thought of leaving grandmas etc.
My sister in law made the move when her kids were older - 9 and 12 and they were more reluctant. I think that as kids get older they get more fixed with their friends and social circle and so find moves harder - I speak from experience as a teacher and as a kid who moved every 2 years from the age of 4.
If your kids are feeling devasted you might need to point out all the good points about the move. Make sure they're involved in every part of the decision process. Jane - sis in law, got her kids to draw up a spidergram about the moving process to help them feel more in charge and involved in it all.
Hope that helps a bit.
sb:)

spid Feb 22nd 2008 10:06 am

Re: UK to NZ for the Kids
 

Originally Posted by jads (Post 5967674)
Have any of your kids been devastated at the thought of going to NZ, did you go anyway and how did they cope once they were there. Did your kids put you off moving.

Cheers Jads

HOw old are your kids?

We are lucky in that being forces my kids have moved on average every 18 months to 2 years and so are excited about this next stage of the adventure. They are 8 &1/2, 11 and 13 (will probably be 10, 12 and 14 by the time we move).
Point out all the positives, listen to all their concerns and take them seriously and try to solve the problems WITH them not for them (this is assuming they are older), get them involved in the dicisions needing to be made. Not whether you go or not - take that as a foregone conclusion but which stuff to take, look at houses on the net and ask their opinions about the size of garden etc, are you taking pets? Let them research who the carriers would be etc. Get them invovled but don't push it. Once they realise they are going anyway, they SHOULD end up getting involved and accept the situation. How about promising surfing or ski-ing lessons?

Good luck.

teebrown Feb 22nd 2008 11:21 am

Re: UK to NZ for the Kids
 
I agree with Spid, we too are forces and my 5 year old has had 4 moves now and lived in 3 different countries, both my kids are eager to move again (we have only been in this posting for 5 months!

Encourage them to sit and write emails now to friends and exchange letters or postcards and explain that is how easy it is to do from NZ and set up a webcam so they can see their friends.

I also suggested to someone from another forum to try and get your kids a penpal (obviously vetted first) with children their own age who has been through the move, that way they will have a friend waiting for them when they get to NZ. There maybe someone on this site who has kids of the same age.

All the very best anyway.;)

spid Feb 22nd 2008 12:02 pm

Re: UK to NZ for the Kids
 

Originally Posted by teebrown (Post 5968448)
we too are forces


Hey, coincidence! WHich one and where (don't recognise Bordon)?:D

teebrown Feb 22nd 2008 3:12 pm

Re: UK to NZ for the Kids
 
Hey Spid,

Army and Hampshire, just left Germany.:)

spid Feb 22nd 2008 3:55 pm

Re: UK to NZ for the Kids
 

Originally Posted by teebrown (Post 5969265)
Hey Spid,

Army and Hampshire, just left Germany.:)

We are RAF - Fife just returned from the Falklands (7 months here now)

jads Feb 22nd 2008 5:33 pm

Re: UK to NZ for the Kids
 
[QUOTE=spid;5968122]HOw old are your kids?

We are lucky in that being forces my kids have moved on average every 18 months to 2 years and so are excited about this next stage of the adventure. They are 8 &1/2, 11 and 13 (will probably be 10, 12 and 14 by the time we move).
Point out all the positives, listen to all their concerns and take them seriously and try to solve the problems WITH them not for them (this is assuming they are older), get them involved in the dicisions needing to be made. Not whether you go or not - take that as a foregone conclusion but which stuff to take, look at houses on the net and ask their opinions about the size of garden etc, are you taking pets? Let them research who the carriers would be etc. Get them invovled but don't push it. Once they realise they are going anyway, they SHOULD end up getting involved and accept the situation. How about promising surfing or ski-ing lessons?

Hi

We have 2 boys aged nearly 11 & 15, the older one is fine as he is just finishing his last year at senior school, but the other one is more sensitive and can only see what he has to lose, he wasnt really impressed on the recci either!

Jads

Good luck.

Catkin09 Feb 22nd 2008 8:25 pm

Re: UK to NZ for the Kids
 
Hiya
Our 2 boys at aged 7 & 10 at the time of the move, now aged 8 & 10, were excited at first and couldn't wait to come here, then they changed their minds, then they changed their minds, this went on and on....:)
The eldest wants to do conservation work when he grows up, so we pointed out all the conservation things going on here, and the youngest hates being inside and just wants to do sporty things, so it's ideal for him.
We had a few tears on their last day at school when they broke up for Christmas, but within an hour they'd sorted themselves out and started getting excited again.
They are both now settled in school and have loads of new friends. You'll find that kids adapt to the change beter to change than adults.
This is a fantastic place to bring up your kids, you'll have more quality family time to do things together, the beach is never far away and there's always something to do with so many beautiful places to visit.
We've only been here since January 1st this year and they've already said they only ever want to go back to the UK on holiday, not to live.
Catkin


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