Struggling

Old May 21st 2020, 12:30 am
  #31  
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Default Re: Struggling

Originally Posted by hallie_day View Post
Yes. I had a recommendation from another forum - a barrister and family law/Hague Convention specialist who I contacted directly and has been brilliant. He was so touched by what is happening (there is more I haven't written here about my husband and his family's behaviour) that he contacted me on Anzac Day and has been checking on me regularly.
It's good news re splitting our assets - not the 50:50 my husband thinks it will be because of our economic disparity, but bad news re the kids - they are habitual residents.

Most of all I'm just shocked at the thought of living my life out somewhere I never wanted to live and was coerced into moving to.
I'm glad you contacted a lawyer Hallie, it's probably hard to talk about but please let us know how you go.

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Old May 21st 2020, 7:50 am
  #32  
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Default Re: Struggling

So apparently I do have a chance of leaving with the kids (without husband's permission) but it's an outside chance, it will be a costly legal battle and one of the things I will need is a job contract to prove I have the means to support them. At the best of times I don't know how I would get this working in my industry and living abroad, when my return to the UK is not guaranteed, let alone with the job situation as it stands globally.
Ironic when I have never had a gap in employment in 25 years at home,and my biggest practical worry here is how on earth I will support myself.
I'm just checking with the lawyer to see if my parents could act as guarantors. We have enough equity for me to be able to live mortgage free, and our outgoings including all bills and food were £800 pcm in London compared with about four times that here.
If the job thing is non negotiable I don't think I can proceed.
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Old May 21st 2020, 9:11 am
  #33  
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Default Re: Struggling

Originally Posted by hallie_day View Post
So apparently I do have a chance of leaving with the kids (without husband's permission) but it's an outside chance, it will be a costly legal battle and one of the things I will need is a job contract to prove I have the means to support them. At the best of times I don't know how I would get this working in my industry and living abroad, when my return to the UK is not guaranteed, let alone with the job situation as it stands globally.
Ironic when I have never had a gap in employment in 25 years at home,and my biggest practical worry here is how on earth I will support myself.
I'm just checking with the lawyer to see if my parents could act as guarantors. We have enough equity for me to be able to live mortgage free, and our outgoings including all bills and food were £800 pcm in London compared with about four times that here.
If the job thing is non negotiable I don't think I can proceed.
Do let us know the outcome of whether your parents can be guarantors.

This situation does, unfortunately, come up with relative frequency in the Forum and I am sure there are people in the same boat reading silently who will benefit from your postings.
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Old May 21st 2020, 7:46 pm
  #34  
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Default Re: Struggling

I hadn't thought that other people might be in the same position so while I am waiting to hear back re my parents etc, here is the advice I received:
There is no set formula for how the Family Court decides such relocation cases but the overall best interests of the children are at the forefront. Relevant factors that the Court look at include (but are not limited to):



·Non-moving parent’s capacity to demonstrate continued interest in the children after relocation;

·Extent and focus of the conflict between the parents, either underlying or resulting from a decision to relocate;

·Practical consequences of relocation (transport, costs, accommodation);

·Impacts of granting or declining relocations on children’s family and social support networks;

·Cultural and spiritual considerations;

·Children’s age and ability to adapt;

·What the children want;

·The well-being of the parent wishing to relocate;

·Children’s previous living arrangements and suggested new living arrangements; and

·Merit and reasonableness of the parent’s wish to relocate.



I would advise that from your information below there is a reasonable argument for relocation, the children have lived the majority of their lives in the UK only being in New Zealand less than a year. You have a support network and financial stability in the UK (you will need to show this with a job contract). The other side of the argument is the children’s connection to their father and extended family in New Zealand. Which is why your contact proposal should be thorough to cover off how this contact would be managed effectively.
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Old May 21st 2020, 7:53 pm
  #35  
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Default Re: Struggling

Hallie - do you know anyone in the UK who owns a business that could offer you a job? A friend, family member, even a friend of a friend. Perhaps that could help your plight if getting a job offer by other means is slim. Just a thought.

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