Struggling!

Old Nov 8th 2012, 9:43 am
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Default Struggling!

We've been here (Chch) for about 6 weeks now and Hubby starts his new job on Monday. Great for him, not so for me. I'm currently a stay at home Mum of a one year old and so far have found it really difficult to adjust. I've been to as many local things as I can but am finding it really hard to find 1) mums who dont work and b) first time mums my age(36). They all seem so young here! Please someone tell me it will get better and that I'm not the only Mum over 30 in NZ!
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Old Nov 8th 2012, 1:24 pm
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Default Re: Struggling!

Oh Pomwi - sorry you are struggling. I know how hard it can be to be "stuck" at home. I pretty much in the same situation here in the UK (just here temporarily) until we come to NZ in Jan. My only saving grace is I have two kids so they manage to keep me quite busy!

It WILL get better. I won't lecture you about getting out there as it can be so hard to make friends in a new country. How old is your little one? Best advice I can think of is get along to plunket groups, local kindergarten or playcentre. Surely there must be a group with at least one mum you connect with. Funny you seem to encounter only young mums, I think NZ first time mums are amongst the oldest in the world (don't quote me on that but I think I read it somewhere). Most people probably need to get back to work to earn $$$.

It's only been six weeks, hang in there!
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Old Nov 8th 2012, 4:57 pm
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Default Re: Struggling!

Where in ChCh are you? Bit older than you (early 50's ). I work in an OSCAR setting in Papanui and the Mums are all ages although none are really young. What do you do during the day at the mo?
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Old Nov 8th 2012, 6:12 pm
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Default Re: Struggling!

Hi, sorry to hear you're finding it tough at the moment. Being a stay at home mum can be isolating when you don't have family & established friendships to fall back on. I'd suggest contacting Plunket, google for the website or ring PlunketLine 0800 933 922. It's a free phone number even from cellphones, & is open 24/7.
Plunket is the leading well child care provider in NZ, Plunket nurses are the NZ equivalent to Health Visitors, but it is an optional service, so unless you ask you won't be enrolled automatically (slightly different if you have a newborn as midwives have a responsibility to encourage you to enrol with either Plunket or an alternative organisation- the alternatives appear to be predominantly Maori health providers). Your local Plunket will have heaps of info regarding all manner of local pre-school child activities & I'm sure that they could point you in the direction of something that might suit. Also you'll get visits from the Plunket nurse, much as you would have had from your HV in the UK.
Don't know if it would appeal but if you'd be interested in voluntary work Plunket have a lot of opportunities for volunteers, young children not a problem & it's a great way of getting out of the house, meeting people & starting the whole networking, cv building stuff for if/when you want to return to work.
Good luck, I hope things start to improve for you soon.
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