schools
 

Oh my,:(
Just as we are at that what have we done stage!!!! (taking a 15 year old girl and 13 year old boy out of a fantastic UK school) this hit the headlines today

:frown:

http://www.stuff.co.nz/marlboroughex...4087a6008.html

We have been here almost 9 months and I have spoken to my lad about this and he tells me that he knows some parts of the school are 'no go' area at break. :eek:

We have been here 9 months now and I dont want to winge but need a little rant!!! Senior level schools seem not so good so far. Although both my kids I know will gain confidence through this move I have real serious doubts that their education could suffer!!!

Anyone out there gone through this and come out with positives? Daughter wants to get to Uni, I hope things are OK there.

Re: schools
 

hi jacky g here

our daughter just finished first year at high school in scotland,we came over here in july only 5 weeks ago,

shes now on her second school....the first school we had to put her into,because we were in zone for had a terrible name,both academically and socially......when we heard about these problems we pulled her from the school,.............

then fought to get her into good school,which she hates:thumbdown:
struggling to cope at moment...............

i have the same problem,not planning on staying here for good....and wondering how daughter will fit back in to education system back home.....

all the work shes doing now is just what she did last year.......so come next year it will be like she has missed a whole year at school....

i also feel we left it to late to bring her over, she is finding it to difficult to fit in,or maybe shes just fighting against it....

i hope this changes and she settles down,but my god its hard when you have teenagers,girls are worse i think......

small things are over dramatised with girls,i hope your 2 settle better than mine:thumbdown:

Re: schools
 

Hi Dawn

We knew early on the the local college had a bad rep. Most of the local consensus of opinion, put the blame firmly at the headmaster and the school management, for failing to address the problem. With a culture of buck passing and the "blame game".

My boss sends her daughters to Christchurch (great if you can afford it).

Not that this helps at all! It's a real shame, because this area has so much to offer and it's a big fly in the ointment.

Hopefully the publicity will help galvanise things, although I think parents should be quite vocal about this. NZ is one of those countries that, if you are quite bolshie, things can get changed.

Re: schools
 

Thats not sounding good Jacky.....just having a down day hopefully....as it sounds like you're looking at going back to the UK already?

In response to your other thread and i know you're not that keen on the housing etc around here....take a drive out through Clevedon and on towards Kawakawa Bay area and you'll see a much more spaced out NZ is just 20-30 mins away. Equally 30 mins south of the city towards Bombay and Pukekohe etc will see you in rolling countryside.

The place we are looking at renting is just a small bit more expensive than you're paying now but is huge, well cared for and in the country where Ri can hopefully go to Clevedon school. Not sure where older ones go.....

Where we all are now is nice but not for us and i suspect ultimately you, but i'm sure the right place to settle is here somewhere for you and the kids....

Assuming that we get the rental we want sorted the house we are in is an option for you through Brian and you may feel much more 'at home' here in terms of the house than where you are now......

Re: schools
 

hi brian

we tookdrive down to clevedon at weekend and kawa kawa bay,lovely but did you see the big sign on beach,DANGER NO SWIMMING POLUTED BEACH..

it was a lovely drive as soon as you turned down to go into clevedon it was like another world,beautifull scenery...

clevedon itself was very old fashioned and quiet,probably the way nz should be.....had a lovely lunch at the woolshed,can recomend that,

i,m more settled and i actually like it here,not ready to go home yet.....
its just kirsty shes fighting against this whole experience,and its causing problems....fingers crossed that will change....:thumbsup:

Re: schools
 

Hi,
We have a 14 year old, we have been here 14 months & she is just beginning to settle down!!!
We've had some pretty rough times I can tell you!

Just bear with it & give it time & you'll be OK.

It's got far better for us since we've moved house (were in Auckland, now Hawkes Bay Countryside). She has friends with horses & enjoys going & helping with them. Also she has been feeding lambs at one of our friends farm.
Far better than walking around shops & going from Cafe to Cafe as she was before!!!

Re: schools
 

hi mickey
nice to hear someone else has same problem with teenager,

but OH MY GOD 14 MONTHS we will be divorced by then :blink:
hoping she settles down before that its disrupting everyone...

we have ruined her life apparantly:blink:
she will thank us one day,i think:thumbsup:
glad to hear your fine now,sounds good where you are,if only you had the wisdom of an adult when you were a child....

life would be so much easier:thumbsup:

Re: schools
 

You probably have, from her perspective. She's 14, a tough age anyway. And certainly not the age where any adult is worth talking to as 'wat du they know'. And she has no-one that 'knows' her to sound off to and chill with and get empathy from in the way of peers.

Even if they are in familiar surroundings it's hard going as they try and figure out how to get from little girl to young adult.

If she shouts at you and 'pushes you away' and belittles your attempts to communicate, you can bet your life she's feeling really crap deep inside when she's on her own and the little girl that has yet to understand and control her emotions as an adult can is probably desperate to be scooped up and hugged like when she was 3, but to show you that would be a sign of weakness!

Whatever your worries and stresses over emigrating and settling into a new life - you can guarantee they are a 100 times worse for your daughter. She is capable of knowing her own mind but has no control at all over where she has to be and what you expect off her.

Obviously I don't know your daughter and I've no place to tell you about motherhood! But I do know how it feels to be her and the desperate isolation and frustration. I would suggest that now is the time to love her more, hug her more, listen to her, and help her. Regardless of how many times it gets thrown back in your face.

Re: schools
 

wow! you should have been a social worker...

you say you don,t know my daughter,but you have just described her whole life at the moment to a tee...

i know how hard it must be for her,but we have promised her that if she gives it a year and is still miserable,then we are prepared to move back....

but she has to meet us half way,she has to make an effort....she just wants to sit in the house all day and do nothing....

someone said its like a grieving process and i guess shes still in denial......

hopefully fingers crossed sometime soon she will accept it.....:thumbsup:

Re: schools
 

It has taken 14 months, but there were a few good months within that.
The summer was OK because we could get out & about more.
Our main problem really was none of her friends where we lived in Auckland, never seemed to do anything, apart from go shopping on a Saturday, whereas back in the UK she was always out with friends, in the park, walking dogs, bike riding.
It was the same for our 12 year old son as well.
We came here expecting all the 'outdoor lifestyle' thing but found it to be the opposite (with others, not us).
In the whole year we were in Auckland he never saw any of his Kiwi friends at a weekend or in the holidays, as they were expected to be with their family all the time.:blink: We did get the impression as well that a lot of Kiwi Kids our sons age seemed very 'clingy' to their parents & behave as if they are a couple of years younger than they are, but if they don't go out & play with their mates they will be.
He did have a couple of English friends, who he did go out with loads of times at weekends & holidays.
I know it is said in the UK that kids don't play anymore, but I must say ours always did in the UK but not so much here!!
They both said lots of times that the Kids in NZ are boring & never want to do anything.
It does seem a little better where we are now, but I must say we still see the 'clingy' thing here as well (only the Kiwi's again).

Going back to the original subject of this Thread, we feel the School standards are not as good as the UK, both our's are doing things now they were doing 2 or 3 years ago. They are both finding the work very easy, even too easy, which is not always a good thing.

Re: schools
 

PM me if she would like to talk to other girls her age. Mine is 13 and would like to meet a few more kids before she goes over.

Nici

Re: schools
 

Interesting thoughts those.........

We've got no direct experience of what the schools and schooling are like yet and still can't decide if we should send our six year old to state or private school but......

My sister in law is a teacher in the UK at Secondary school level and is a subject head i think its called..

She's obviously got lots of teacher friends and a few of them have been told at conferences and seminars that NZ is leading the way in schooling at Primary and Secondary level and i think some things, i don't know what, were put forward as best practice etc?:confused:

The best indication of what the schools are like is not what you're told, its how the kids get on and it sounds like maybe the schools aren't as 'ahead' as the schools would like to have you believe then?

Re: schools
 

hi
my personal opinion is that the schools are behind, and i would have to sgree with you mickey.

we thought it was going to be the outdoor life to,but its not like that here..

maybe we have picked the wrong place...where we were from kids used to be out playing all the time...daughter was always with her friends we very rarely saw her,except when she was wanting something...:blink:

we cant get her to go to school,we pulled her from the school we didn,t like education wise and put her into better school,and she hates it....

the girls are very bitchy aparantly,and are making her feel like an outsider....
she now wants to go back to the first school:frown:

thats kind of the pattern we have got into,shopping at the weekend:thumbdown:
at the moment its definitely not been better for us as a family being over here..putting to much of a strain on everyone....
the best of it is i now realy like it here.....

Re: schools
 

We have some lovely schools here and had a choice of three or four primary schools. Initially our daughter (nearly 13) was horrified by the long kilts, the thought of having to go back to 'baby' school (she'd already done a year at high school in UK).

The first school we looked had a good feel. The headteacher, at our interview, wasn't so concerned about the academic side of things, so much as the children as a whole person, ie their character, personality, interests, opinions etc. They had one major rule at that school, do as you're told the first time or there'd be a consequence (detention, lines, whatever). But that wasn't the school we chose.

Our two go to a state integrated Christian school which has a capacity of 320 on roll from age 5-18. It costs about $1,000 a year, basic, in fees, and there's other stuff on top like trips etc.

I think that's why primary schools here are better. Its the hollistic approach so lacking in English primary schools. The teachers here, in our experience anyway, have an even balance between the mental, physical and spiritual side of a person. English school from an early age seems to be all about SATs and getting good scores in to make the school look good in the league table.

I mean, yes they get assessed to see what level they are at and they get taught at the appropriate level for each academic subject, but there is much more emphasis on encouraging them to think through problems, to be confident in their own abilities, etc. Our son's teacher has on the board 'mistakes are our friends'.

The teachers here don't 'pick' on children. They don't seem to have a class favourite, or a class joker. They don't belittle the children to boost their own ego or to retain some sort of class management.

The children here are treated as worthwhile, they are listened to, guided if going the wrong way either in thought or action, but their opinions count and so they grow in confidence.

I haven't found children here to be clingy to their parents. I rarely see our kids at weekends. Kiwi kids seem very articulate, very confident, wiling to talk to adults, they have a laugh and joke, they don't take offence easily and they encourage one another.

Maybe we just struck lucky but our kids were welcomed from day 1.

Re: schools
 

[the girls are very bitchy aparantly,and are making her feel like an outsider....

..[/quote]

That is an experience I had myself here (back in the early 70's) and have also heard about more recently both from friend's daughters and my own.

Here's another poor kid suffering from it.

http://www.bayofplentytimes.co.nz/lo...condsubsection=