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-   -   returning to uk (https://britishexpats.com/forum/new-zealand-83/returning-uk-754812/)

nelsonpom Apr 14th 2012 12:03 am

returning to uk
 
Seriously considering moving back to the UK. Have found it harder and harder over here since we had our daughter and not having family or good friends nearby our support network has come up well short. Wondered how many people on this website have returned and how are you finding it. Is the UK as bad as is reported or is that an exageration. Would prob keep our house here and as we have citizenship would prob look at returning in the future as we do both think NZ is a wonderful country, but not having help close is really taking its till. :o

scrubbedexpat094 Apr 14th 2012 12:41 am

Re: returning to uk
 
Sorry to hear this Nelsonpom but of course you must do what is right for your family. It must be difficult not having a support network & I can understand you wanting to have this in your life.

I've just returned from a trip back to the UK, apparently it's in recession but it was hard to see any signs of it. Not saying it isn't, it just wasn't that apparent to us.

We did miss being near to the sea, so took a trip to Freshfields & Crosby. Fantastic to see the red squirrels again. Was great to meet up with friends in Liverpool who I last saw approx 20 years ago :eek: & we just carried on from were we left off. I do miss those friendships. Hadn't been to Liverpool in years & I was gobsmacked by how much it has changed. I loved it.

It was great seeing my family & catching up with some of my friends. I think I could settle back into life in the UK quite easily but I also like living here & missed my friends here too. We have been very lucky & made some good friends in NZ, who have been very supportive of us.

I wish you well whatever you decide to do & at least you know you can always come back here in the future :)

love30stm Apr 14th 2012 1:37 am

Re: returning to uk
 
Well not having any help or support when I had my two daughters when I lived in the UK! Never relied on anyone to help, husband and I got on with things so don't make no difference to us.

Also I gave up work to look after them as I had no choice and now we don't rely on two incomes. I Just have a casual position.

nelsonpom Apr 14th 2012 2:00 am

Re: returning to uk
 

Originally Posted by love30stm (Post 10004808)
Well not having any help or support when I had my two daughters when I lived in the UK! Never relied on anyone to help, husband and I got on with things so don't make no difference to us.

Also I gave up work to look after them as I had no choice and now we don't rely on two incomes. I Just have a casual position.

Umm not really sure of any relevance to what I was asking but well done on bringing your daughters up on your own. We do have support and family in the UK but don't have it here so we have a choice which you obviously didn't. Sure lots of people have brought children up without support but I wasn't asking that. :D

nelsonpom Apr 14th 2012 2:02 am

Re: returning to uk
 

Originally Posted by Vitalstatistix (Post 10004769)
Sorry to hear this Nelsonpom but of course you must do what is right for your family. It must be difficult not having a support network & I can understand you wanting to have this in your life.

I've just returned from a trip back to the UK, apparently it's in recession but it was hard to see any signs of it. Not saying it isn't, it just wasn't that apparent to us.

We did miss being near to the sea, so took a trip to Freshfields & Crosby. Fantastic to see the red squirrels again. Was great to meet up with friends in Liverpool who I last saw approx 20 years ago :eek: & we just carried on from were we left off. I do miss those friendships. Hadn't been to Liverpool in years & I was gobsmacked by how much it has changed. I loved it.

It was great seeing my family & catching up with some of my friends. I think I could settle back into life in the UK quite easily but I also like living here & missed my friends here too. We have been very lucky & made some good friends in NZ, who have been very supportive of us.

I wish you well whatever you decide to do & at least you know you can always come back here in the future :)

It interests me as to how bad the recession is, contacted friends and family and getting different views. Really keen to find out what people who have lived here and recently returned to the UK have found......

love30stm Apr 14th 2012 2:06 am

Re: returning to uk
 

Originally Posted by nelsonpom (Post 10004828)
Umm not really sure of any relevance to what I was asking but well done on bringing your daughters up on your own. We do have support and family in the UK but don't have it here so we have a choice which you obviously didn't. Sure lots of people have brought children up without support but I wasn't asking that. :D

I was just saying that would not be the reason I would return to the UK just for support!

I came to NZ for a better life, in some ways it is and some its not but the good thing is it has made me a much more cofindent person that does not need other people for support.

nelsonpom Apr 14th 2012 2:24 am

Re: returning to uk
 

Originally Posted by love30stm (Post 10004840)
I was just saying that would not be the reason I would return to the UK just for support!

I came to NZ for a better life, in some ways it is and some its not but the good thing is it has made me a much more cofindent person that does not need other people for support.

Still no relevance to me and not what I am asking. Again if you want me to congratulate you on becoming a more confident person who does not need anyone else well done. You seem to need to tell me how strong you are and I'm sorry but that doesn't really help with what I am asking or trying to decide.
I am asking for info from people who may have recently returned to the uk. Not everything has to be a contest. I am looking for a better life for my daughter my needs and wants are secondary. I could survive here very easily without support but am trying to determine where she will get a better start in her life, here in this beautiful relaxed country but with no family or back in the UK surrounded by a loving family but in the UK.

love30stm Apr 14th 2012 2:31 am

Re: returning to uk
 

Originally Posted by nelsonpom (Post 10004866)
Still no relevance to me and not what I am asking. Again if you want me to congratulate you on becoming a more confident person who does not need anyone else well done. You seem to need to tell me how strong you are and I'm sorry but that doesn't really help with what I am asking or trying to decide.
I am asking for info from people who may have recently returned to the uk. Not everything has to be a contest. I am looking for a better life for my daughter my needs and wants are secondary. I could survive here very easily without support but am trying to determine where she will get a better start in her life, here in this beautiful relaxed country but with no family or back in the UK surrounded by a loving family but in the UK.

Good for you no need to be so sarcastic but then again this forum is full of it :nod: and your lucky you can return some of us don't have that Option as I just get pissed off with this place but for different reasons!

crap coffee Apr 14th 2012 2:36 am

Re: returning to uk
 
my parents still do love home (thats somethings I would NEVER understand ....) and prefer live in home country. no matter how crap /problems whatever... it doesn't matter to them! I think thats just nature. whereas i have spent most of my adult life here,,, this is the place where I do feel most comfortable..except I don't like Nz in many ways. :rofl:

Go home - do what your soul tells you to do. Its time to listen your heart. I pretty much trust my gut feelings. and its often not wrong. Last year I lived in Auckland for 6 months, and I was seriously miserable most of time there, and then returned to Welly - my soul tells me, auckland is a wrong place to be. yes, money was good in auckland, but who cares. money doesn't make you (me at least...) much happier.

bourbon-biscuit Apr 14th 2012 3:47 am

Re: returning to uk
 
nelsonpom, I entirely understand the pull to family, particularly when you have young kids. The only caution I would offer you is to try and be very realistic about what the relationships with family would be like if you move back. If you look on the 'moving back to the UK' forum (below all the country forums), you'll find more posters who have moved back- those who love it back in the UK and those who have found moving back unsatisfying. Good luck with your decision making and all that. :)


Originally Posted by nelsonpom (Post 10004866)
You seem to need to tell me how strong you are ...

Stick around, soon she'll be telling you how gorgeous she is and when she's having sex. :unsure:

love30stm Apr 14th 2012 5:19 am

Re: returning to uk
 

Originally Posted by bourbon-biscuit (Post 10004919)
nelsonpom, I entirely understand the pull to family, particularly when you have young kids. The only caution I would offer you is to try and be very realistic about what the relationships with family would be like if you move back. If you look on the 'moving back to the UK' forum (below all the country forums), you'll find more posters who have moved back- those who love it back in the UK and those who have found moving back unsatisfying. Good luck with your decision making and all that. :)


Stick around, soon she'll be telling you how gorgeous she is and when she's having sex. :unsure:

http://reluctantmom.files.wordpress....pg?w=350&h=454

concretepump Apr 14th 2012 5:39 am

Re: returning to uk
 

Originally Posted by nelsonpom (Post 10004737)
Seriously considering moving back to the UK. Have found it harder and harder over here since we had our daughter and not having family or good friends nearby our support network has come up well short. Wondered how many people on this website have returned and how are you finding it. Is the UK as bad as is reported or is that an exageration. Would prob keep our house here and as we have citizenship would prob look at returning in the future as we do both think NZ is a wonderful country, but not having help close is really taking its till. :o

hi we moved back in 07 , (could not sell house ) but yes we are still in recession, i work in the construction industry and there are firms who have work and others that don't have much, there is a lot of traffic here bumper to bumper most of the time, don't find it a problem in living back here as started my business back again and still living in same house
NZ will have a real shortage of workers in the near future because they are making it harder for people to come in ,dont get me wrong we still come over every year for a hoilday things are cheaper still in UK weather is UK weather just had a hot march now back to cold and rain
maybe you could come back for a holiday and see how things work out then might help you make your mind up, hope this helps

luvwelly Apr 14th 2012 5:44 am

Re: returning to uk
 

Originally Posted by nelsonpom (Post 10004737)
Seriously considering moving back to the UK. Have found it harder and harder over here since we had our daughter and not having family or good friends nearby our support network has come up well short. Wondered how many people on this website have returned and how are you finding it. Is the UK as bad as is reported or is that an exageration. Would prob keep our house here and as we have citizenship would prob look at returning in the future as we do both think NZ is a wonderful country, but not having help close is really taking its till. :o

Have not read the other replies. Off back in next couple of months...but then it was never supposed to be permanent for us and so we always rented here.
How would you fund a new house in UK if you kept the one here? I think it probably has to be all or nothing. If you are still saying you would return here, then maybe you don't really want to leave, I would guess. You are just at an inconvenient stage where some family support would be valuable.

I never thought the UK was crap so I don't believe anyone who insists it is now. If you are asking that, then you don't really want to return, unless it's ages since you visited.

Was back last July and loved it even though getting a decent coffee was very hard lol.
I think you just know when you really need/want to go back...or it is always there in the long-term plan as in my case.

I find life here very Groundhog Day because of the isolation I think.

luvwelly Apr 14th 2012 5:48 am

Re: returning to uk
 
Just read the other replies. I personally think the long-term outlook is better for kids in UK than NZ. As a parent in NZ, I would be very very sad to see my child go off on their OE.

crap coffee Apr 14th 2012 6:07 am

Re: returning to uk
 

Originally Posted by luvwelly (Post 10004995)
Just read the other replies. I personally think the long-term outlook is better for kids in UK than NZ. As a parent in NZ, I would be very very sad to see my child go off on their OE.

I agree. 200%.

If I had kids, most definitely bring them up in UK.


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