Relative's health problems in the UK
Jun 24th 2011, 1:21 am
#1
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Relative's health problems in the UK
I found out this morning that my sister has been diagnosed with lung cancer. She has a 13 year old and a 6 year old. She is going for scans and if it hasn't spread will have an operation to remove one her lungs in the next few weeks. I know it is early days but I can't help fearing the worst. I can't imagine what she must be going through and what my neice and nephew wil have to go through.
I am planning on going back, along with my 4 yr old daughter to help out for a while. My husband would stay here whilst we did that.
It never occurred to me that something like this could happen when I am so far away. I had thought about funerals and what I would do, but only in the case of older relatives or further down the line. I had thought also about other long term illnesses but not in terms of my sister.
Has anyone been in this type of situation before?
My sister is married but I feel a responsibility for my niece and nephew. I love my life over here and the whole family has a much better quality of life but am now wondering if we will be moving back, something which I would have never considered before.
I am planning on going back, along with my 4 yr old daughter to help out for a while. My husband would stay here whilst we did that.
It never occurred to me that something like this could happen when I am so far away. I had thought about funerals and what I would do, but only in the case of older relatives or further down the line. I had thought also about other long term illnesses but not in terms of my sister.
Has anyone been in this type of situation before?
My sister is married but I feel a responsibility for my niece and nephew. I love my life over here and the whole family has a much better quality of life but am now wondering if we will be moving back, something which I would have never considered before.
Jun 24th 2011, 5:08 am
#2
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Posts: 2,228
Re: Relative's health problems in the UK
I'm really sorry to hear this. My brother was seriously ill some time ago and, while I was nearby - ish (in the UK and he was in Sweden), our parents were in NZ. Mum came over and we both sat by his bedside in intensive care. He was ok in the end, but you have to take each day as it comes. Don't worry about the future. Just focus on her needs now and how you can help with practical matters and emotional support.
Take care of yourself as well. There's a saying about 'putting your own air mask on so you can help others'. A good metaphor I think.
Take care of yourself as well. There's a saying about 'putting your own air mask on so you can help others'. A good metaphor I think.
Jun 24th 2011, 6:59 am
#3
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Re: Relative's health problems in the UK
I'm so sorry.
Jmh is right, try to remember to look after yourself as well, when a loved one is ill it's a very stressful time and sometimes we neglect ourselves in the process. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Jmh is right, try to remember to look after yourself as well, when a loved one is ill it's a very stressful time and sometimes we neglect ourselves in the process. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Jun 24th 2011, 7:00 am
#4
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Posts: 4,298
Re: Relative's health problems in the UK
I found out this morning that my sister has been diagnosed with lung cancer. She has a 13 year old and a 6 year old. She is going for scans and if it hasn't spread will have an operation to remove one her lungs in the next few weeks. I know it is early days but I can't help fearing the worst. I can't imagine what she must be going through and what my neice and nephew wil have to go through.
I am planning on going back, along with my 4 yr old daughter to help out for a while. My husband would stay here whilst we did that.
It never occurred to me that something like this could happen when I am so far away. I had thought about funerals and what I would do, but only in the case of older relatives or further down the line. I had thought also about other long term illnesses but not in terms of my sister.
Has anyone been in this type of situation before?
My sister is married but I feel a responsibility for my niece and nephew. I love my life over here and the whole family has a much better quality of life but am now wondering if we will be moving back, something which I would have never considered before.
I am planning on going back, along with my 4 yr old daughter to help out for a while. My husband would stay here whilst we did that.
It never occurred to me that something like this could happen when I am so far away. I had thought about funerals and what I would do, but only in the case of older relatives or further down the line. I had thought also about other long term illnesses but not in terms of my sister.
Has anyone been in this type of situation before?
My sister is married but I feel a responsibility for my niece and nephew. I love my life over here and the whole family has a much better quality of life but am now wondering if we will be moving back, something which I would have never considered before.
Jun 25th 2011, 3:15 am
#5
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Joined: Apr 2011
Location: Napier
Posts: 69
Re: Relative's health problems in the UK
Also just wanted to say am really sorry to read that and will be thinking/praying for your family xx
Jun 26th 2011, 5:52 am
#6
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Re: Relative's health problems in the UK
Our thoughts are with you too.
Jun 26th 2011, 11:56 am
#7
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 7,208
Re: Relative's health problems in the UK
This is so very sad, and I think I and maybe others could relate to what you are saying in terms of kind of allowing for it being older relatives/parents etc, but not siblings and nieces and nephews.
I think if you have always been close and an intricate part of her extended family then you would be very wise to think about what you can and can't practically do from here.
Follow your heart and instinct.
My thoughts are with you also.
I think if you have always been close and an intricate part of her extended family then you would be very wise to think about what you can and can't practically do from here.
Follow your heart and instinct.
My thoughts are with you also.
Jun 26th 2011, 8:56 pm
#8
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Posts: 19
Re: Relative's health problems in the UK
Thank you everyone for your kind words and thought. I am leaving on Wednesday for 4 weeks and will just have to see what happens when we are there.
Jun 28th 2011, 9:36 pm
#10
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Posts: 0
Re: Relative's health problems in the UK
How very sad & distressing for you all. My thoughts are with you, have a safe journey & 
that your sister is able to be operated on.
Be gentle on yourself & take care of you, as others have said.
that your sister is able to be operated on.Be gentle on yourself & take care of you, as others have said.
Jun 28th 2011, 11:04 pm
#11
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 38,613
Re: Relative's health problems in the UK
It's times like this when we know we are very far away. So sorry to read that your sister is ill and that you are having to make this journey for that sad reason.
All good wishes for the journey & times that lay ahead for you all.
All good wishes for the journey & times that lay ahead for you all.
