Pulled in two directions!
 

Hi, I'm new to BE and am looking for some views from people who have moved to NZ from the UK. I totally understand that everyone has different experiences/feelings but am hoping that you guys are able to answer just a few questions that are whirling around my mind and I apologise in advance if I waffle on a bit too much about my dilemma!! :o

I am a 45 year old mother with two children aged 11 and 13 (the eldest having Aspergers Syndrome - mild autism). My husband is a fully qualified carpenter and we currently run our business from home. He has a relative who successfully moved to Greytown, Wellington several years ago and who feels our move would be nothing short of the best thing we could do. He would have no problem in helping to find a job for my husband - he has many contacts. We are seriously looking into moving to NZ as soon as we can but the more I think about it the more anxious I become! I'm sure I am not the first to feel this way and it is all probably very normal. :unsure:
We need to make some moves sooner rather than later as time is of the essence as my Husband is 49.

We had considered emigrating to NZ a few years ago but issues in the UK held us back. These issues no longer exist and the move is back on track. We don't have strong family ties to hold us here and we want a better quality of life for our family as a whole. My husband feels strongly that New Zealand can offer us alot more than this country can and therefore I have spent alot of time at this computer researching as much as I can about New Zealand to try and get a feel of the place; areas to live, work, education, support for special needs, cost of living, etc.

The country looks beautiful, we'd have a great outdoor life, lovely beaches, weather is milder with warmer Summers than the UK, we could afford to own a much better home, but all I keep hearing is how expensive it is to live over there?!
Is it really that much more expensive to survive over there than it is in the UK?
We are not a 'wealthy' family and would have a reasonable sum to put down on a house over there to keep weekly costs down but could anyone advise on what sort of income/salary we would need to live a suitably comfortable existance in NZ? All I seem to hear is how people are struggling?!

We have a very positive approach to moving over; we work hard and are fighters (so to speak) to make things happen, we are pretty laid back as we live in the country and so the pace of life is slower than in major cities, we are friendly and easy going so hopefully we won't have a problem making friends. My worry, 'the children'! :blink:

I have no doubt in my mind that my youngest will flourish over there as he loves the outdoors, is sporty and I'm sure he will have no trouble making friends as he has an outgoing personality. I'm concerned about my eldest who has Aspergers. I am interested to hear from anyone who can tell me about the support that NZ can offer? Although he doesn't need major support here, he will, on the first part of moving schools, need a considerable amount of assistance until he gets into the swing of things.
I have found a very good college for them in Greytown which looks ideal and the fact that he could stay on until he is 18, with perhaps work experience built in, says that he stands a better chance in life over there than he does here. They do have a support program and funding for children who need additional support. Also....bullying? He has had his fair share of this over here (even at a very reputable school!) as he is a little 'different' socially and heart-breakingly does not have the social circle that a child of his age should have :( Hence he is not opposed to the move.

We have been looking at moving to the Wellington area but slightly more inland, due to having a relative in that area. Is there anyone reading this who knows about this area? It looks good from a computers perspective and obviously from our Uncles views but some more realistic views would be good :D Or would we be better moving closer to the beach? Or is that a silly question?! We live near the beach in the UK but hardly ever go there.....lets just say its not by any means as desirable as the beaches in NZ :lol:

To sum it all up, we don't want to spend the rest of our lives in the UK! We can't see our quality of life getting any better here (unless you have oodles of £'s!!) and we want to try and give our children more opportunities than the UK appears to offer now....and I don't wish to get all political!! Even with the best education that money can pay for, youngsters are struggling to get work, unemployment continues to rise to ridiculous figures!

I'll sign off now and wish you all a happy, hopefully sunny day down in New Zealand :D

Re: Pulled in two directions!
 

Hi again

I was very interested to read your post because we too have a 13 year old son with aspergers. He is high functioning and does quite well academically at main stream school but could count his friends on one hand. He is too much of a geek for the cool kids who tend to give him a hard time. My husband is a Kiwi so that part of any move would be relatively easy for us. We want to go back to NZ for family reasons i.e. there are lots more of them and several cousins for my son to get to know. Here, he only has us and my parents. I worry that there will be noone for him when we are older or gone. I know that sounds morbid but when your childs social future looks uncertain you do fixate on these things.

It will be a reluctant move for us because my husband has a job that he really loves and I have a job that I endure but a job all the same. However, these are things that will just have to change. The real sticking point is also our sons education what with year 9 options coming up and all. We worry about whether the changes will be too much for him and whether the schools there are as clued up on Autism as his current school is. There is the New Zealand Autistic Society who may be able to help. Apart from that I don't have much to offer you at the moment apart from empathy because I know how 'all consuming' having a child with Autism can be.

I wish you all the best whatever you decide.:)

Re: Pulled in two directions!
 

unless there's been a massive geographic shift that I haven't heard abuot Greytown is not in Wellington?? :confused:

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The closest main town to Greytown is probably Masterton as you have to go over the mountain range (Rimutakas) to get to Wellington - or through the tunnel on the train, about 1.5hours driving. For this reason I do find the east coast (Wairarapa) from Wellington slightly too remote for my liking, also the beaches aren't suitable for swimming. Having said that the house prices are cheaper than the Wellington side and there are some excellent schools.

You seem to have done your research really well but I would suggest contacting schools in that area and seeing what they say about your son's condition and likelihood of receiving extra teacher-aide help. Friends of ours who live in Masterton send their sons to Rathkeale which is a state-integrated school costing about $5000 per year but they say it is worth every cent and their results are superb as is the quality of extra-curricular activities. Send them an email, I'm sure they'll be helpful. You may find this list helpful too for contacting state schools. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of...lington_Region

I think everyone is pulled in two directions especially with friends and family. As for costs, yes food is more expensive here mostly because of the lack of competition and GST (VAT) is added to everything. There are lots of market garden places selling cheaper fruit/veg in the Wairarapa though. Clothes are the other thing that we notice - either cheap rubbish or expensive. We do order online from M&S and Next though. Other things such as petrol, insurance, children's clubs are cheaper so we haven't noticed that much difference from our outgoings in the UK.

As for weather, it does get HOT on that side of Wellington and from time-to-time there can be lots of flies which can be irritating. We live the other side on the west coast where it is cooler and gives us better access to the rest of NZ without having to cross mountain ranges, but that's up to individual taste.

I wish you luck with your decision, do an online shop equivalent and other research. I can't help you with salaries in that sector, but I'm sure someone else that can.

Re: Pulled in two directions!
 

Food in the Uk is waaaaaaaaaay better, virtually no addatives, way more choice and is excellent value for money. In NZ by contrast there is shite (horrid addatives) in most non fresh foods (I am an avid label/ingredient reader having young kids and having been educated by a programme on Tv a few years back about what all this crap does to kids), the choice is limited and food is very expensive over here in comparison to the UK prices.

There are ONLY 2 big high street supermarket companies and thus as a duopoly every time you go to the supermarket you will get that funny sensation of having been bent over your trolley and shafted in a very royal manner. They are ripping us off within an inch of our lives IMO.

Plus wages are shite in NZ in comparison to the Uk in way too many cases. NZ has lots of plus points but food, the cost of living and wages and choice in supermarkets are not 4 of them. Add in the horrific driving by most of the kiwis and you have a nice round 5 crap things to consider.

Been here 7 years and inspite of the above life is good here and our shite basket is outweighed by the good basket. Which is nice. Some days the shite basket is VERY heavy for one reason or another but mostly the good basket is fuller!! It used to brim..but the honey moon period has long gone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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I go to Greytown (occasionally) as a day trip over the mountain from central Wellington. Have food in a cafe, walk up and down the small high street and drive back. Not really worth it once you have done it more than once.

Have you ever visited NZ yourselves? Greytown is nowhere near a beach. It's a place many people in Wellington have their bache. I wouldn't want to live there personally and Masterton (biggest nearby town) is a bit of a dump too (stayed there overnight more than once).

Special needs is definitely better funded and recognised in UK but it is possible in NZ that people in general are more readily accepted for their quirks, so that one could go either way.

Financially I don't see how relying on your relative to find your OH work, could work well. His idea of a living wage may not match yours.
If financially you are keeping your heads above water in UK, then I would say stay put based on what you have said. The grass is not always greener...not even when the finances are not the issue.

Your benefits in UK which you would not have in NZ are a large tax free allowance (here you are taxed on every dollar), fees for doctors visits, school contributions....sure there are more.
The unemployment thing is also an issue in NZ - why do you think so many of its young people leave and never return? I know many a University educated person in Wellington who is behind a coffee machine all day making coffee (and not in their own business).

Your kids are quite old already so in a few years they could be leaving NZ and leaving you alone trapped in NZ?

Make no mistake it is very expensive here and wages are generally low.
PS Your rellies are maybe enticing you over because they want your company lol.

Re: Pulled in two directions!
 

http://www.minedu.govt.nz/NZEducatio...Education.aspx
This is a good starting place it gives a good overview of the provision in relation to special ed.
I am a UK trained teacher and have 10 years special education experience in both mainstream (SENCo) and within a specialist school. I have been working as a specialist teacher on short fixed term contracts supporting ASD children here in NZ. It is similar to the UK in that there are both good and bad levels of support - in my experience schools which have satellite units or specifically trained staff are best suited to your sons needs. It is a case of asking schools in the areas you are interested in very detailed questions. Larger towns usually have the best resources. I have worked in both rural and large town schools. The special education budget is under pressure here in NZ and the level of support is not as readily available in comparison to the UK. I had to wait 4 months for a specific software programme to arrive from central resources (and that was just for a child to trial!). I have seen some good inclusive practice but it is very dependent on the attitude of the school as I have also seen some poor practice. This is usually due to the lack of training and understanding of additional support needs. I try not to compare the service here to readily as I worked in Central Scotland prior to coming to NZ and the level of service was excellent there. You will not escape bulling in NZ - again it is ensuring the school you choose has a rigorous policy. I worked in a small rural school and bulling was one of the issues I had to address - helping the other children (and staff) to understand an ASD child and their needs. The best advise would be for you to come over for a visit - talk to the schools and look beyond the school policy. Talk to other parents who face similar issues. I understand the dilemma and you will know it is preparation, preparation, preparation and even more preparation for children on the Autistic Spectrum. As long as you are aware that just like the UK the system here is not perfect and the funding is very restricted by comparison. Just be selective - for your family to relocate you may need to place schooling at the top of your list. The area you move to may be determined by this. If you have any specific questions in relation to the support needs of your son please feel free to contact me. Good luck

Re: Pulled in two directions!
 

More expensive definitely, but the general quality of fresh food, cafes and restaurants is far better than the UK, especially if you live in Auckland or Wellington.

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Nope. That isn't how it works. You can't just have a pal find you work.

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Why especially if you live in Auckland or Wellington? Some of the best meals we have ever had have been down here in Hawkes Bay or other rural areas,far better than any meal we ever had in Auckland. At least you are eating where most of the stuff is actually grown. Napier takes some beating for eating out & so does anywhere on the South Island.
I wouldn't say it's far better than the UK, we used to get locally grown fresh veg from May to October from Markets/Farm Shops.The fresh food as far as Fruit/veg goes is very short here for NZ grown stuff in comparison & we are already seeing American & other foreign goods on the shelves again (we bought Chilean grapes today!). Was talking with a fruit grower last week, he reckons it's the worse growing season he has ever seen, lots of crops being lost/reduced because of the damp/cool summer & we can expect some high prices in the coming months. Some of the stone fruits we have bought this year have been awful, we've even seen them rotting on the supermarket shelves!

P.S. OH says Greytown is a lovely place, she always stops there on the way to Wellington Uni.

Re: Pulled in two directions!
 

Because it's utter tosh and pretty stupid thing to suggest that a whole country's food is better than that of another, gosh it varies from one shop to the other so much and none more so than here in Auckland and none of it is consistently good.

A lot of the fruit and veg in the shops here is low-grade, piled high in sweaty plastic bags and just about fit for the compost and I can't see that many of the Auckland or Wellington specific cafes or restaurants are out there sourcing the best available ingredients.

The diet of the average Kiwi is not exactly centred around good fresh ingredients anyway; tinned beetroot, Subway, KFC and the $10 pile it high chinese 'smorgasbord' in the fish and chip shop is more where the market is at for a 'good feed'. Yuck!!

Re: Pulled in two directions!
 

Greytown has some decent restaurants and touristy shops. It is not a dump but very small and fairly remote. Nearest Mall might be in Upper Hutt (Lower Hutt's is bigger) over the mountain - not sure if Masterton has much of a Mall.

Re: Pulled in two directions!
 

I don't mean there isn't quality outside, I'm just referring to the fact that the bigger population will have more options in terms of grocerers, like Nosh or Farro, Asian supermarkets etc. Plus the range of enthnicities in restaurants.

I can also tell you that the Countdown in Greenlane or Newmarket has a hell of a lot better food than many of the more rural supermarkets I've been to, which seem to be very much back to basics.

Re: Pulled in two directions!
 

Nope that's right....the wife does that....:p