Genesis

I used to teach this stuff when I was a trainer with plod. Whilst I love life in NZ we have had quite a few HUGE problems beset us in the almost 5 years we have been here. Felix our lad was diagnosed with epilepsy and has behavioural problems which are sometimes sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo huge I don't know what to do. We have spent much money in the past with a psychologist and will spend more shortly. He has also been labelled a 'genius' which has manifold problems that come with such a 'gift'.

We have lost a huge amount of cash thanks to Mark Hotchin and his cowardly partner watkins who hides in London. We do have money in the UK but as you all know the exchange rate dictates that we leave it there and alas like the rest of you earn about 2p every decade in interest as a result of the OCR implosion worldwide.

We have much to be thankful for though, a wonderful house in a wonderful area. We thankfully have no fiscal worries inspite of out recent bad luck and money being in the 'wrong place'.

I have a lovely wife and 3 lovely kids who are all healthy save for Felix's attitude issues. YET I sometime get bogged down with negativity. I try to overcome this by refelcting on our good fortune generally and I do realise there is nothing I can do about any of the problems that have come to our door in the past.

I am currently staying in a hugely disappointing bach in Ruamati that cost $2.3k for a week. It was penned as being new and modern and its a bloody joke. Felix is going nuts and everything is getting a bit tricky. No doubt when I complain the owner will tell me to piss off. I get sooooooooooooooo sick of people getting away with so much shit whilst we have to stomach all the crap they have sent our way.

Is it me or is life sometimes a HUGE bastard? Any tips on positivity????

Am Loolah

Breath in. Breath out. Repeat.

Smile. Laugh. The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.

Oh. And wine. That usually helps!

Sorry to hear things are getting you down at the moment. Take a walk, preferably in the sunshine. Combination of exercise and day/sun light help life the clouds of doom.

Genesis

Cheers AL. Just made some folk laugh, done some walking and have plenty of wine on tap..thus the cure is just round t'corner!!!!

bdclayton

POSITIVILY???
How do you get it ? what causes it ? And how do you keep it
I played a lot of semi pro football and have coached sprinter and long distant runners
I have run over 50 half marathons and ran the London Marathon in under 3 Hours
All with positive attitude.
When I played football I honestly never thought we would lose.(obviously we did and quite a bit). When I was sprinting if I got beaten I went back training and tried harder.
This is starting to sound like a bloody advert.
I don’t think anyone can be positive all the time. My wife says I am far to optimistic and she should know she is a physiatrist Nurse.
But things like exercise and doing something different do help.
Break the regular routine
DRINK IS NOT THE ANSWER.
Think of the poor folk back in the UK shivering then look at the sunshine here.
It must be difficult when one of your children is as you described and must be time-consuming and trying.
I Wish you all the best and I know its easy for me to say but all will come right in the end
I have no tips on Positivity what works for one person is no good for another
I whish there was a magic "positive potion " I would send you some
Good Luck

.

george toni

$2.3k a WEEK are you sure about that!

you would need to be positive for at that price!

kiwinow

$2.3K for a bach for a week sounds exorbitant to me. I'd want a whole lot of luxury for that. Go on and complain. It will make you feel better, and if you got it from an internet site where you can leave a comment, leave a nasty one.

I think the others are right though - get out and do things that are interesting and new. Your son's problems are going to be a challenge and I don't envy you that - sometimes reading and gathering info can help you feel armed and there may be an online support group for either the epilepsy problem or the parents of a genius problem. Such a child will need much stimulation, but I'm guessing that seeing that as an adventure rather than a chore might help. Maybe get the family to list new things they want to try and then work out what's achievable. Chin up. As you say, despite your financial problems you have money in UK, nice house and relatively healthy kids, which makes you more fortunate than many kiwis.

Am Loolah

I found this site for gifted children in NZ.

And this one for epilepsy.

I'm quite sure you've researched it all on the internet already - but just in case you haven't.

Genesis

Thank you AL..you are too kind

Thank you also to the others who responded. I am glad you too would expect something 'special' for $2.3k for 7 days. Thanks also for the 2 very kind PMs..especially from Tomsk who has been incredibly kind offer to a complete stranger.

Justcol

There are some incredible people on this forum.

irish_eyes

sorry i posted a comment on my own thread instead of this. I also wanted to say that there is a book called "the secret" and it may just click a few things into place for you. I often refer to it if i need some positive thoughts. Its not for everyone tho but just thought i'd mention it.

pricklykina

well sometimes it's ok tp have the farkits...just don't let them linger for tooo long

My GP just recommended this site calm.auckland.ac.nz/
For strength management and resilience

I can't advice you on ideas for your son but I can recommend looking after you and remembering the oxygen mask principle...you can't care for others unless you take care of your needs first.
So make time every day to do things that give you , or used to give you joy and wait for the good vibes to kick in.

MnB

HI Genesis
Sorry to read that you have been hit by the Ba****d blues at the moment.....$2.3 for a week ....I too would expect something very special for that kind of money, go on and complain!, ok, you may get told to sling your hook but at least YOU will feel better for it!!

Sometimes the support you might need is under your nose......hope that having posted on here has helped along with all the useful replies. Def agree with OP who said that in order to care for others we have to care for ourselves.......its ok to feel pi**ed off once in a while At least you've been true to yourself & your family.

Hope you get your usual 'umph' back soon & continue to enjoy life with your lovely family.
Best wishes
B x

Am Loolah

I have always believed that fundamentally the heart of BE has always been a "help and treat others as you would like to be helped/treated" It's what I have strived to do since living in NZ for any newbies and anyone who is struggling in the city I love, and what I love seeing others do for each other.

We all sometimes need support and I love the fact we should feel we can ask each other and/or just be offered it from each other through this site.

Memo to self ... less wine, more sense ,,,,,,

BEVS

My god mate. 2.3K for a week in a bach

I don't swear much ,but sh!t, I could've sorted you better than that by far on the Sounds

Whatever made you do that money to yourselves

Perry Groves

2 words: Jack Daniels