Batty

I got back from Ireland on Tuesday and I think I've beaten the jet lag today

It was a short visit (only 10 days) but no matter if it had been 10 or 40 the last day was always going to be a bummer - it was harder to say goodbye this time than it was when I left 3 years ago. I cried on and off from Dublin to Hong Kong Having heard others experiences I am seemingly quite normal I've got a large family (no surprises there I suppose, being Irish) and they've got young children so it's too difficult (and expensive) for them to come to me. We've agreed that they'll shout my trips back every two years so everyone wins.

They live in a very rural part of Ireland and although it's only 50 miles to Dublin the lifestyle there is very different. All country roads and rolling hills and very little traffic. I went 'up to the city' once and once was enough thank you very much A walk that used to take me 20 minutes took over half an hour due to the crowds of people on the streets - I was holding onto my handbag like a mad old woman

Back down the country, my mother won't stay at home on her own at night so sleeps at my sister's house. Ground floor windows are not left open because of fears of a break-in and two of my nephews won't sleep downstairs in a bedroom that was purpose built for them. Another sister is building a house that will have seven locks on the front door I just can't imagine that - there's something so wrong about being afraid in your own home. There was an armed robbery at a supermarket 4 miles away on Saturday night - my brother in law had been there 10 minutes previously The young girl behind the counter had a knife put to her throat. In the local paper the main headline was about a man who'd opened his door to some guy who stabbed him - for no reason apparently.

I know we'll hear the same stories here but they're very rarely outside of particular areas. We used to hear these stories coming out of 'bad' areas of Dublin and Limerick and think that one crim had got rid of another so no bad thing there then. Now it's indiscriminate and is affecting everyone.

Clothes are really cheap and really good quality but everything else is horrifically expensive. Costs have increased about 50% for electricity and home heating oil since we left in 2005. Ever since the Euro came in Ireland has been one of the most expensive countries in Europe and they're really suffering for it now. Unemployement is the highest in 10 years because companies are relocating to countries where wages are low and lots of companies are going out of business due to the recession.

I was still so upset when I got back here that my Hubby said 'we can go back if you want to' and I immediately thought 'no, don't want to do that - I just don't want to leave my sister behind' and that's something that we immigrants have to live with. Missing your family. If I have one piece of advice it's that it's up to us to maintain the contact with the people we have left behind. Because that's exactly what we've done - left them behind. I was very lax over the last year or so and would think that they could call me too so weeks would go by without speaking to any of them but that doesn't do anyone any good. I've just taken possession of a webcam and mic and downloaded Skype yesterday so now we'll be able to keep in contact much more easily.

When I left on Sunday it was 17 degrees and overcast and felt cold (actually the weather was so bad at Heathrow takeoff was delayed almost 2 hours) and when I arrived home it was 17 degrees and sunny and felt so warm. Having a few days off before I go back to work is great and Spring is here and now that the jet lag seems to have abated I'm feeling so much better and glad to be back.

scrubbedexpat094

Welcome Home Batty . Great to have you back.

Certainly sounds like you've had an interesting time. How sad that your family don't feel safe in their own homes, a sign of the times I guess.
Hope you had plenty of kleenex for the journey home or did you have to resort to OH's shirt . The keeping in touch thing is funny. We were discussing recently how in the past year we can count on one hand, the number of friends who have called us, even the M-i-L doesn't call as often now . We do get a bit resentful that it is us who have to do the keeping in touch. Ah well, just the way it is. Getting skype sounds like a good idea, I've thought about it but haven't got a round to it!

Batty

Thank you It wouldn't have been so bad if I had had OH with me but I went alone so had nobody to cuddle me and go 'there, there'

I'd often thought about the SKYPE before but like you, had never got around to it. I had to do it now or otherwise I'd end up letting it slide again. I bought this http://www.trademe.co.nz/Browse/List...x?id=174715830

pixi-dust

Im glad you're over your jet lag now. It's so pants!
Ten days really is a flying visit. Did you have much jet lag when you arrived?

Also its ace you've got a web cam sorted out. I totally know it's not the same as seeing the person, but I talk to my mum and dad every week for at least an hour, my brother about once a month. And I really think this is what's kept me sane and not overwhelmed with homesickness sometimes. And it's not a wanting to go back thing - it's a missing people thing. I knew before we came that this was going to be my biggest hurdle and it has been. I am so so lucky that my mum comes over and loves NZ almost as much as we do ( but I'm sure she wishes it was nearer!)
Or close friends and us have kept in touch religiously since we moved and those that arent such close friends we keep in touch with a little less but it's all good.

Batty

No Laura, not much jet lag at all when I got there - they did think I was a bit mad being up at 7 and out for a walk though After a couple of days it was grand. I'm so excited with my webcam - my sister just wants me to be able to see the boys as they're getting bigger and for them to not forget me - and Mike too because they were so disappointed he didn't travel. The six year old asked me if he was still big