I needed a laugh- now I need my bed!
Why's of Men
1. WHY DO MEN BECOME SMARTER DURING SEX (because they are plugged into a genius) ---------------------------------------------- 2. WHY DON'T WOMEN BLINK DURING SEX? (they don't have enough time) ----------------------------------------------- 3. WHY DOES IT TAKE 1 MILLION SPERM TO FERTILIZE ONE EGG? (they don't stop to ask directions) ----------------------------------------------- 4. WHY DO MEN SNORE WHEN THEY LIE ON THEIR BACKS? (because their balls fall over their butt-hole and they vapor lock) ----------------------------------------------- (You're laughing, aren't you?!?!) ----------------------------------------------- 5. WHY WERE MEN GIVEN LARGER BRAINS THAN DOGS? (so they won't hump women's legs at cocktails parties) ---------------------------------------------- 6. WHY DID GOD MAKE MEN BEFORE WOMEN? (you need a rough draft before you make a final copy) ----------------------------------------------- 7. HOW MANY MEN DOES IT TAKE TO PUT A TOILET SEAT DOWN? (don't know......it never happened) ( c'mon guys, we laugh at your blonde jokes!) ----------------------------------------------- And the personal favourite: 8. WHY DID GOD PUT MEN ON EARTH? (because a vibrator can't mow the lawn) ----------------------------------------------- Remember, if you haven't got a smile on your face and laughter in your heart... then you are just an old sour fart! ----------------------------------------------- One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweat-shirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, 'What setting do I use on the washing machine?' 'It depends,' I replied. 'What does it say on your shirt?' He yelled back, ' University of Oklahoma '. And they say blondes are dumb.........!! --------------------------------------------- A couple is lying in bed. The man says, 'I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world.' The woman replies, 'I'll miss you...' ----------------------------------------------- 'It's just too hot to wear clothes today,' Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, 'Honey, what do you think the neighbours would think if I mowed the lawn like this?' 'Probably that I married you for your money,' she replied. ----------------------------------------------- Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man? A: A rumour ---------------------------------------------- Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; and Patience for his moods, because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death. AMEN -------------------------------------------- -- Q: Why do little boys whine? A: They are practicing to be men. ---------------------------------------------- Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name? A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough. ----------------------------------------- ----- Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail? A: Rename the mail folder 'Instruction Manual.' ---------------------------------------------- Send this to at least five bright, funny women you know and make their day! Send this to five bright men who have enough sense of humour to take it! ;) |
Re: I needed a laugh- now I need my bed!
:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:
number 4 is def my favorite!:thumbsup: |
Re: I needed a laugh- now I need my bed!
Lovely, I needed a laugh too! x
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