I love NZ but.....
 

hello all, just felt a huge urge to post my thoughts this evening..... For some strange reason I think i'm homesick. I love love love living here and defo do not want to go back to Ireland but i'm feeling like something is missing and cant quite put my finger on it. I saw my mam and brother and his family on a webcam last week for the first time since we left and I havent been feeling right since then. They burst into tears when they saw us and we did the same when we saw them. Anyone any idea why i'm feeling this way and any ideas on how to over come it?

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

Its just that your missing your family, nothing more nothing less.
Emotions are a funny thing they have a tendancy to sneek up on you
and kick you in the arse nwhen your not watching.
We've been the same since our eldest son (19) left us to return to the uk
just before xmas.
You'll get over it and put things back into perspective soon.

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

I skype my parents and inlaws every week and feel the same,although not as bad as it used to be ( taking Xmas and New year out the equation) IT WILL GET BETTER my friend has been here over 3 years and still has her "moments" ( what we call it when we are homesick and feel down :o)

Phyl x

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

Oh how horrid for you, I guess it was just seeing them that stirred up all these emotions, its only natural its going to be hard and seeing them must have been a real bolt.

I so dread coping with these times when we finally come over. But like others say you will be right :thumbsup:

Chin up
Dewb

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

We have discussed this a lot: we feel we are probably not homesick but we freely acknowledge that there are people we miss terribly. I think that's the difference: you are probably not homesick for "home" as NZ is your "home" and if your loved ones came out too you would have no problem :) Thank goodness for Skype :thumbsup:


Jan

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

Its funny because I have the same thoughts...My mum arrives in NZ on Saturday and stays for 5 weeks...I do like it here but Im certain that if she lived here I would feel much more settled...

Im currently trying to get my brother to look at NZ rather than Canada so then Ill have the family close by.

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

I saw snowy pics of the UK and wanted to go back 'home'. Inspite of loving it here and us having a way better life here than we could in the UK I stiil get the odd pang of 'what am I doing here??" Answer is giving my kids a life they could only dream of in the UK. A dip in our lovely pool over looking a little forest compounded why life is so good here for us...ordinary folk like us don't have pools in the UK..here owning one is no big deal.

Also I think when you have spent 46 years somewhere part of you will always miss the old country. Hope you feel better soon..my cravings for the UK never last long!! Happy new year!!

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

we have been here 18months and i can quite honestly say i do not miss england. However, i miss my mum and dad terribly and this was only the 2nd christmas i have ever spent away from them. :thumbdown: Just thinking about them being so far away can set me off crying (but crying isnt all that strange for me at the moment being 8months preggers!)
and i know that it will be worse once the baby comes and me mum goes back. skype is brill though and i love chatting to them, although i know what you mean- it can be stressful and i do get upset afterwards soemtimes :confused:
but hang in there- its tough but just think of what we have moved here for and all the benefits that we have. and dont forget that you will not have to look back when you are 50 and say i wish i had .....
you decided to come for a reason and you are making a go of your life and not living someone elses. i have to keep reminding myself why we have come but it does work- and hey if you are missing them then boot up the webcam again and chat again. :thumbsup::thumbsup: i chat more now to both my parents than i ever did when i was in england.
take care :rofl:

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

It's hard & I reckon just about everyone on here has some kind of sense of what you're going through. That's not to belittle it...it's a hard, hard emotion, and there's just no way around it. I'm another that loves the life that I & my family have in NZ, no real homesickness pangs for England....bot honest to goodness there's a few people that I'd love to have near again. I've found it hard this year because a few of my important people back in the UK have had a really tough year last year...normally I'd have been there for them, even if it was only for a bit of crying on shoulders, working our way through wine bottles and the resultant drunken ramblings to put the world to rights...and you just can't do that the same on Skype.
All I can say is that for me it ebbs and flows and as I've built a new life and new friends over here I've found that I get those tough moments less frequently, but sometimes they just still somehow appear from nowhere and they hit hard.
Take care of yourself, make the most of the contact that you can have & I truly hope that it gets easier for you.

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

Feel for you, its hard isn't it. I cry nearly every time I speak to my dad, thank god he hasn't got Skype I don't think I could cope with that :( I just remember how much we love it here and the life we are giving ourselves and our daughter outweighs anything really. Sometimes you have to be a bit selfish and live your life how and where you want. It will get better (I hope) keep smiling and enjoy the sunshine xxx:thumbsup: Bevissa

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

[QUOTE=Genesis;8227180]I saw snowy pics of the UK and wanted to go back 'home'. Inspite of loving it here and us having a way better life here than we could in the UK I stiil get the odd pang of 'what am I doing here??" Answer is giving my kids a life they could only dream of in the UK. A dip in our lovely pool over looking a little forest compounded why life is so good here for us...ordinary folk like us don't have pools in the UK..here owning one is no big deal.

Awww that is so lovely :thumbsup: hope you conitinue having such a good life in NZ

Dewb

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

:thumbsup: so true I swing from feeling very selfish about our decision to go, to feeling NO you only get one life live it how you want........

Tough though :(

Dewb

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

I have traveled a great deal living in most of the international cities in this world, I love what NZ offers however life is about people... and people make a place :D

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

:thumbsup: too true

Hi & Welcome by the way

Dewb

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

My dad (Who lives out in Co. Clare) e-mailed me to say it was bitterly cold and snowing. Bitter cold or walking barefoot in the summer sand, it would take a lot of talking to convince me I'd want to be there.

Have you thought about a few quiet days away just to break the regular holding pattern of life and take your mind off things?

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

Thats exactly what i did charismatic, we went away for the weekend just gone and it was just what the doctor ordered. Half my facebook friends are going on about the snow, cold etc... and in once sense I was delighted to be here and in another, I felt odd that I was missing it all - nothing a trip to the south island wont fix tho!!!

I do really miss my best friend. If ever there was a day that I was down, a quick cuppa or glass of wine with her and the world was right again. Shes very much in my life tho and for that i'm grateful. It just sucks that with the time difference she is not always awake when I am and therefore, chatting needs a bit of planning.

Skype is brilliant, no denying it. I can cope with seeing my brother and mother on it but it was seeing my niece - she was a different child. Just walking when I left and now flying around the place almost 2 years old. A lovely little girl that doesnt know me at all and visa versa. Thats hard.


In saying all that, I will never forget why I left and what I've gone through to get here. My kids are having such a wonderful life and are very happy, which in turn makes me happy. I was pulled here, not pushed. And, I'm never going back. New Zealand is home now.

I know that this feeling that i've had is - as someone nicely put it just a "moment" and that its just part of the process of emmigrating. The break away this weekend has done me the world of good.

Thanks folks for the excellent advise you've shared. This site truly is a silver lining for me.

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

:thumbsup: your sounding heaps more upbeat atta girl :thumbsup:

Dewb

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

Glad your are feeling better this week. We need to sort out an evening meal or something. How about the thai again?

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

Keep feeling the 'pull' Irish eyes!!
Glad 'moment' has passed and you're ready to face the next one lol
B x

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

http://z.about.com/d/animatedtv/1/0/e/3/zoidberg.jpg
Just as well, my next plan involved becoming professional gamblers and marrying Tiger Woods so you dodged a bullet there.

From what I understand weather has happened in Britain again with catastrophic snowfalls of up to a few inches.

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

Thats an interesting plan charismatic, never say never to the gambling bit but as for tiger woods - god he is such a gobsh@#$

Was talking to me mammy today and she was saying that me aunty that lives in Co Kildare is freezing her backside off cause her pipes are frozen solid!!! I had to laugh cause I was sitting out on the deck having a coffee lappin up the sun!!!

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

jesus how many more moments can a girl handle? - I suppose it it doesnt matter how many more, its how I deal with them that counts:thumbsup:

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

thanks vitalstatistix - would love to meet up again - thai would be wonderful!:thumbup:

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

:thumbsup::thumbsup:
absolutely !!:lol: B x

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

intersting. I didn't know you get the odd pang like that, (me too :unsure:) thought you are 101% happy here. .

I remember you came here for a short periord when you were younger, but now you are in your 40's or 50's?? :eek:. time goes so fast eh. well I can't believe I ve been here too much too long. feel old now- especially this year. I am still too scared to think about -- what if I have to spend rest of my life here in Welly? ? :eek: (but still it's ok living here and I know I can live here. but I don't actually know what else I want more? ) just wish I was more capable of being anywhere and have lots of money and being brave. but I am opposite to that.

had a long walk with mum and me yesterday. while we were walking, we had a hot discussion on UK vs NZ and WHY life is way better here, overall. well she said she wouldn't live there unless she has to. cos its dirty old crowded crammed . Mum emphasizes that your everyday living - in a CLEAN & SAFE environment is utterly important more than anything else. not to mention the warmer weather here... She describes nz as PARADISE. and, She often tells me this.. "think about: why loads of brits wanna move here... in the first place."

but that's her own opinion tho.

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

haha - that bit about my age made me laugh crap coffee, where in the name of jesus did you get that i was in my 40's or 50's - So funny you think that!! I'm actually only 33!!!!

You need a better opinion of yourself and i mean that in the best possible way. Anything is possible in this life - you only get one chance so dont waste it!!! Stop worrying about whats going to happen in the future and start enjoying the here and now!! :thumbsup:

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

hey I was talking to Genesis,.

Irish eyes, I feel sorry you've been through a hard time but I do understand you. think time will tell.

wonder how many of us living a "perfect life"?

cheers.

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

Hi CC. Yes I am happy here..very content but sometimes as you can see from my most recent post I do get issues that I have to deal with..I guess just like everyone else. Wellington by the way is sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo cool. I just love the place. It is utterly awesome and would love the opportunity to spend some time living there. Its way more appealing than JAFA. And NZ is an awesome place to be. Whilst flecked with many, many problems its still well cool aye? I will always hanker after bits of the UK..as for living there in the perfect world i would spend 4-6 weeks there a year..as for living the 100%....not in a trillion years. NZ is faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar to good to EVER leave for ever. Peace sister.

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

you are sooooooooooooooo funny -. :rofl::rofl::D it made me larfffffff. good to hear you seem fairly content with your life in nz anyway! and I am glad you love Wellington.

as much as you'd love to be in Welly I'd also love to be in Palmy too. I love the beautiful park and nice scenary, nice houses around. they are waaaaaaaay better than the Welly one you know!

right, is there any place in the world without issues? -every single place has got its good & bad. human beings aren't perfect after all. hence no where is perfect.

while having lunch today, just thought this - "LIFE IS SIMPLE" in NZ. though we have less choice whatsoever, still the choice we can make here isn't too bad. so certainly life isn't crap here. (I am fussy and I can't live somewhere cr@p) sometimes, a simple life can be good/healthy in a way - I don't mind - it's better than complicated.

hope you fully enjoy the life you desire in nz.

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

oops sorry didnt look at the quote - No one on this planet has a "perfect life". Some are close to it and some dont think of it that way and those that say they do have a perfect life - are liars!!!

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

For me, when I feel out of positive thoughts, i place them (mentally) in a box, try keep busy, most importantly, I sleep on it. Things always seem slightly better the next day. Another good thing would be to share your thoughts with your wife. A problem/emotion shared is a big weight off your shoulder and your wife will know the best way to cheer you up or steer you right!

I love it here on the hibiscus coast so god knows I'd love it anywhere else further south of here if its meant to be better!

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

Friends of our emigrated about 4 years ago now and we were recently talking about NZ versus UK ...... they summed it up really (IMO)

.... in that its not 100% better as there will always be things that you miss or things that are different and don't quite come up to scratch, but they reckoned it was a good ratio of 70:30 in favour of NZ.

Now for me (not being a mathematician) I reckon that's a good bet , I don't expect to fall in love with absolutely everything, just as long as the scales tip the right way I will be happy :thumbsup:

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

:thumbsup::thumbsup: nicely put louloumama

Where in surrey are you?

Dewb

Re: I love NZ but.....
 

Have pm'd you DewB ;)