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How have your kids coped with the move?

How have your kids coped with the move?

Old Aug 3rd 2006, 8:22 pm
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Default How have your kids coped with the move?

Right-now my concerns turn to my 3 marvellous children.
Bethany-aged 9, Daniel aged 8, Joseph aged 2.
I am now wondering if anyone has kids these ages-how did they settle in? How did they cope? Have you experienced any problems with being 'different'? Any bullying episodes?
Also does anyone know what the options are in South Wellington to have Joe (2) minded should we have childminding difficulties? Nurseries? Nannies? Mad-but-nice old people?
Thanks again to you all. Danny
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Old Aug 3rd 2006, 10:41 pm
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Default Re: How have your kids coped with the move?

Originally Posted by danny.f
Right-now my concerns turn to my 3 marvellous children.
Bethany-aged 9, Daniel aged 8, Joseph aged 2.
I am now wondering if anyone has kids these ages-how did they settle in? How did they cope? Have you experienced any problems with being 'different'? Any bullying episodes?
Also does anyone know what the options are in South Wellington to have Joe (2) minded should we have childminding difficulties? Nurseries? Nannies? Mad-but-nice old people?
Thanks again to you all. Danny
We came over September last year with a then 8 year old and 11 month old, they are now nearly 9 and 2 - they have both settled incredibly well (better than us parents). Our 9 year old has been at 2 schools, due to us renting in one zone, then buying in another and she still keeps in contact with those from the first school. In Auckland the kids seem really used to having immigrants/travellers come and go and the schools seem to be geared up for this as well. She has made loads of friends, had lots of sleepovers and kids over to play, she's got involved in local footie club, swimming, basketball, athletics ..... one thing that can't be argued is how well adapted for kids the whole lifestyle out here is. Because of her age/birthday she effecitvely went up a school year when we arrived, she hasn't struggled one bit though. The 2 year old goes to gymbaroo, swimming and other local toddler groups (there are tonnes of these), she's also just started at an early learning centre where she goes for 2 sessions a week and absolutely loves it.
We have webcams for us to communicate back with the UK and this is how the girls see Nanny and Grandad, and although I know they miss them there hasn't been any tears or "homesickness" on their part.

I do think it's a lot to do on how you cope as parents and coach them along wiht the whole re-settling process, but certainly our 2 girls have flourished out here!

Good luck.
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Old Aug 3rd 2006, 11:07 pm
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Default Re: How have your kids coped with the move?

Originally Posted by P18PPS
We came over September last year with a then 8 year old and 11 month old, they are now nearly 9 and 2 - they have both settled incredibly well (better than us parents). Our 9 year old has been at 2 schools, due to us renting in one zone, then buying in another and she still keeps in contact with those from the first school. In Auckland the kids seem really used to having immigrants/travellers come and go and the schools seem to be geared up for this as well. She has made loads of friends, had lots of sleepovers and kids over to play, she's got involved in local footie club, swimming, basketball, athletics ..... one thing that can't be argued is how well adapted for kids the whole lifestyle out here is. Because of her age/birthday she effecitvely went up a school year when we arrived, she hasn't struggled one bit though. The 2 year old goes to gymbaroo, swimming and other local toddler groups (there are tonnes of these), she's also just started at an early learning centre where she goes for 2 sessions a week and absolutely loves it.
We have webcams for us to communicate back with the UK and this is how the girls see Nanny and Grandad, and although I know they miss them there hasn't been any tears or "homesickness" on their part.

I do think it's a lot to do on how you cope as parents and coach them along wiht the whole re-settling process, but certainly our 2 girls have flourished out here!

Good luck.
We always knew the kids would adjust better than us adults,they have less to fear,and no responsibility to make it work,Gawd bless 'em.
Do you both work? I mean,what happens to the two yr old if you are both at work?
My wife and I are going to be doing shift work,and I'm sure there'll be situations where an overlap of shifts means we'll both be at work,so we're thinking of nurseries or nannies! Just unsure what's available. Thanks for your story.
Danny
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Old Aug 3rd 2006, 11:30 pm
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Default Re: How have your kids coped with the move?

Originally Posted by danny.f
We always knew the kids would adjust better than us adults,they have less to fear,and no responsibility to make it work,Gawd bless 'em.
Do you both work? I mean,what happens to the two yr old if you are both at work?
My wife and I are going to be doing shift work,and I'm sure there'll be situations where an overlap of shifts means we'll both be at work,so we're thinking of nurseries or nannies! Just unsure what's available. Thanks for your story.
Danny
Husband works in CBD, I've just started part-time work now (this week in fact), neither of us work shifts though. I've been for a few interviews though, and if you get a good company they will recognise and want to retain good staff, so they'll do all they can to assist employees, I'm sure this isn't the norm across all industries yet within NZ, but certainly the lack of candidates and skilled employees means that the culture is starting to change and employers are having to allow employees the whole work/life balance if they are to retain them. There is a survey that has recently been conducted of the 50 best employers within new zealand - vodafone came up ontop - sorry can't remember the name of the survey, but I'm sure someone will know. What line of work are you both in??
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Old Aug 4th 2006, 5:43 am
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Default Re: How have your kids coped with the move?

Originally Posted by danny.f
Right-now my concerns turn to my 3 marvellous children.
Bethany-aged 9, Daniel aged 8, Joseph aged 2.
I am now wondering if anyone has kids these ages-how did they settle in? How did they cope? Have you experienced any problems with being 'different'? Any bullying episodes?
Also does anyone know what the options are in South Wellington to have Joe (2) minded should we have childminding difficulties? Nurseries? Nannies? Mad-but-nice old people?
Thanks again to you all. Danny

Hi Danny
Our kids are 5 & 3, my son has been going to school here since May, & loves it & is doing really well, & his confidence has come on loads. My daughter goes to kindy & thinks its fantastic. We think schooling here is much more relaxed than in the UK, but they are both doing well. They also web cam with grandparents which they all think is fab. Can't help with the child care for a 2 yr old as we are both at home
have fun
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Old Aug 4th 2006, 10:05 am
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Default Re: How have your kids coped with the move?

Originally Posted by P18PPS
Husband works in CBD, I've just started part-time work now (this week in fact), neither of us work shifts though. I've been for a few interviews though, and if you get a good company they will recognise and want to retain good staff, so they'll do all they can to assist employees, I'm sure this isn't the norm across all industries yet within NZ, but certainly the lack of candidates and skilled employees means that the culture is starting to change and employers are having to allow employees the whole work/life balance if they are to retain them. There is a survey that has recently been conducted of the 50 best employers within new zealand - vodafone came up ontop - sorry can't remember the name of the survey, but I'm sure someone will know. What line of work are you both in??
We are both Children's nurses in Alder Hey in Liverpool,my wife is a Ward Manager/matron,I am a charge nurse. The trust we work for currently has a scheme called 'Improving Working Lives',which is meant to retain staff who have kids by allowing us to work our contracted ours flexibly,but this can only work with the support and understanding of our colleagues.
Naturally,therefore,my concern is that neither of us on our own wards want to arrive,and start being awkward about what hours we can and cannot work.
This problem was really only skirted over at interview 'cos we were more concerned at getting the posts. We appreciate we will have to discuss this with our respective managers and hope there will be a degree of flexibility and understanding,which is why our main concern is the 2 yr old. Might start a nursery instead!!
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Old Aug 4th 2006, 10:44 am
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Default Re: How have your kids coped with the move?

Originally Posted by danny.f
Naturally,therefore,my concern is that neither of us on our own wards want to arrive,and start being awkward about what hours we can and cannot work.
This problem was really only skirted over at interview 'cos we were more concerned at getting the posts. We appreciate we will have to discuss this with our respective managers and hope there will be a degree of flexibility and understanding,which is why our main concern is the 2 yr old. Might start a nursery instead!!
Hi danny
I'm also in healthcare and I have to say that i've found the healthboard to be a real mixed bag when it comes to flexible / parent friendly working - some of the divisions are resigned to it as all of their staff are parents, others are quite fixed that too many part-timers / flexible workers is not a good thing, so it could go either way once you start having the discussions.

We have a 4yr old and a 2yr old, we both work full time. They go to daycare full time and are having a ball. In chch, the general set up within an early years daycare setting is a nursery for babies up to 20mths, a toddler area for littlies up to 3ish and then a preschool which is comparative to the kindy provision. Ours is open 7.30 - 5.30 Mon - Fri but I am aware of some facilities open sat am too. We pay $310 per week total and that includes a hot meal for them both at lunch time. You get the usual choice of full time, full days or sessional days (am's or pm's). The staff are all trained early years teachers which is great. As with the schools the emphasis is more relaxed and the preschools tend to focus more on social skills / problem solving / relationships rather than academia.
HTH
Vicki
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Old Aug 4th 2006, 11:11 am
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Default Re: How have your kids coped with the move?

Originally Posted by danny.f
We always knew the kids would adjust better than us adults,they have less to fear,and no responsibility to make it work,Gawd bless 'em.
Do you both work? I mean,what happens to the two yr old if you are both at work?
My wife and I are going to be doing shift work,and I'm sure there'll be situations where an overlap of shifts means we'll both be at work,so we're thinking of nurseries or nannies! Just unsure what's available. Thanks for your story.
Danny
Our girls aged 3 & 8 have settled really well, our 8 year old never looked back, and is currently having a sleepover with 3 of her friends, and it's at our house, oh no!!!!
I work shifts and as of yet hubby hasn't started work, we are fortunate that really only 1 of us needs to work, we did expect our youngest to settle into nursery and he start work, but that wasn't to be, she hated each of the ones we tried her in so at the mo, she goes to the local pre school, for a couple of hours each morning and loves it! the rest of the time she is with daddy and loving it.
We are thinking about Barnado's which is home care system where the kids either go to the carers house or she comes to you, but again we are not rushing into anything!!
Most employers seem to be flexible, but that doesn't really count for my job as a nurse where you really do need to be there on time to take over, so I need to be absolutely sure the child care is right, and up to now we haven't found that right care!!
But hopefully you will, good luck!
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Old Aug 4th 2006, 11:57 am
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Default Re: How have your kids coped with the move?

Originally Posted by westies
Our girls aged 3 & 8 have settled really well, our 8 year old never looked back, and is currently having a sleepover with 3 of her friends, and it's at our house, oh no!!!!
I work shifts and as of yet hubby hasn't started work, we are fortunate that really only 1 of us needs to work, we did expect our youngest to settle into nursery and he start work, but that wasn't to be, she hated each of the ones we tried her in so at the mo, she goes to the local pre school, for a couple of hours each morning and loves it! the rest of the time she is with daddy and loving it.
We are thinking about Barnado's which is home care system where the kids either go to the carers house or she comes to you, but again we are not rushing into anything!!
Most employers seem to be flexible, but that doesn't really count for my job as a nurse where you really do need to be there on time to take over, so I need to be absolutely sure the child care is right, and up to now we haven't found that right care!!
But hopefully you will, good luck!
We were wondering about single occupation,but for now have opted for both of us doing 4 days each. D'ya want to start a pre school nursery? That'd be cool. Don't mind who knows are details. We expect to bring around $100,000
with at least $60,000 going on a mortgage deposit,so dunno what the mortgage repayments are going to be like yet,but I've said before,it never was about money,it was about quality,so as long as the kids are ok,etc.
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Old Aug 4th 2006, 12:00 pm
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Default Re: How have your kids coped with the move?

Originally Posted by Joshlin
Hi danny
I'm also in healthcare and I have to say that i've found the healthboard to be a real mixed bag when it comes to flexible / parent friendly working - some of the divisions are resigned to it as all of their staff are parents, others are quite fixed that too many part-timers / flexible workers is not a good thing, so it could go either way once you start having the discussions.

We have a 4yr old and a 2yr old, we both work full time. They go to daycare full time and are having a ball. In chch, the general set up within an early years daycare setting is a nursery for babies up to 20mths, a toddler area for littlies up to 3ish and then a preschool which is comparative to the kindy provision. Ours is open 7.30 - 5.30 Mon - Fri but I am aware of some facilities open sat am too. We pay $310 per week total and that includes a hot meal for them both at lunch time. You get the usual choice of full time, full days or sessional days (am's or pm's). The staff are all trained early years teachers which is great. As with the schools the emphasis is more relaxed and the preschools tend to focus more on social skills / problem solving / relationships rather than academia.
HTH
Vicki

Vicki,you blooming enormous star,that is a well positive email. Its the first indication that there is a nursery available for pre school babbies. Thank you so much. Defo karma coming your way.
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Old Aug 4th 2006, 12:39 pm
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Default Re: How have your kids coped with the move?

Originally Posted by danny.f
Vicki,you blooming enormous star,that is a well positive email. Its the first indication that there is a nursery available for pre school babbies. Thank you so much. Defo karma coming your way.
I'm a qualified NNEB would you like me to set up a nursery?LOL

You might be pleased to know that by 2012 they plan to have 3/4 of all nursery staff with 'degrees in early childhood years' so as an NNEB I probably won't get a job (I couldn't use it towards a visa). ..I might be able to do the childminding though?
Re children settling.. our kids were 7 and 10 when we moved to Singapore. they settled ok although it was bc. (before computers.1996)so they were relying on snail mail from friends and family until we got ourselves onto emails a couple of yrs later.
I agree that a lot of the attitude comes from the parents. If you are positive the children will be. We looked at it as an adventure.
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Old Aug 4th 2006, 12:43 pm
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Default Re: How have your kids coped with the move?

Originally Posted by helinuk
I'm a qualified NNEB would you like me to set up a nursery?LOL

You might be pleased to know that by 2012 they plan to have 3/4 of all nursery staff with 'degrees in early childhood years' so as an NNEB I probably won't get a job (I couldn't use it towards a visa). ..I might be able to do the childminding though?
Re children settling.. our kids were 7 and 10 when we moved to Singapore. they settled ok although it was bc. (before computers.1996)so they were relying on snail mail from friends and family until we got ourselves onto emails a couple of yrs later.
I agree that a lot of the attitude comes from the parents. If you are positive the children will be. We looked at it as an adventure.
Same here-it's the easiest and most fun way to sell it to the kids. Problems going to be when about a month is up and they realise they're not going home,that this is now home-but I reckon that'll be more my problem than theirs.
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Old Aug 4th 2006, 10:02 pm
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Default Re: How have your kids coped with the move?

Originally Posted by danny.f
We were wondering about single occupation,but for now have opted for both of us doing 4 days each. D'ya want to start a pre school nursery? That'd be cool. Don't mind who knows are details. We expect to bring around $100,000
with at least $60,000 going on a mortgage deposit,so dunno what the mortgage repayments are going to be like yet,but I've said before,it never was about money,it was about quality,so as long as the kids are ok,etc.
not really on topic, but just to respond to your mortgage thoughts - we have a mortgage of $140,000 - we've got $40,000 fixed for 1yr and $100,000 fixed for 2yrs - costs us $507 per fortnight on a repayment type mortgage.
Vicki
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Old Aug 4th 2006, 10:19 pm
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Default Re: How have your kids coped with the move?

Originally Posted by Joshlin
not really on topic, but just to respond to your mortgage thoughts - we have a mortgage of $140,000 - we've got $40,000 fixed for 1yr and $100,000 fixed for 2yrs - costs us $507 per fortnight on a repayment type mortgage.
Vicki
Vicki-me old buddy-what's the game with the mortgage here? Can you barter for each week in a mortgage market-flapping your arms wildly til someone takes your cash for the week to keep the Govt happy? Not the same as here then!! Do you find it cheaper or not me old Vickster?
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Old Aug 5th 2006, 1:34 am
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Default Re: How have your kids coped with the move?

Originally Posted by danny.f
We were wondering about single occupation,but for now have opted for both of us doing 4 days each. D'ya want to start a pre school nursery? That'd be cool. Don't mind who knows are details. We expect to bring around $100,000
with at least $60,000 going on a mortgage deposit,so dunno what the mortgage repayments are going to be like yet,but I've said before,it never was about money,it was about quality,so as long as the kids are ok,etc.
Just for interest for you guys we bought a house for 400,000 dollars, we have a mortgage of 200,000. the repayments are 680 each fortnight.
Probably a fantastic idea to set up nursery, definately lots of call for it, seems if you do find a good nursey waiting lists are massive, we have 1 in mind, names are down but earliest will be March next year, alot of schools have after school clubs, but again waiting lists!! our daughter is currently no. 18 on the list!!! seems to be alot of waiting games going on.
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