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-   -   how to convince the other half? (https://britishexpats.com/forum/new-zealand-83/how-convince-other-half-558966/)

big nelly Sep 2nd 2008 12:00 pm

how to convince the other half?
 
Me, i want to move to NZ, my son wants to leave the Uk (unhappy with the violence and scared to do anything without an adult being present) and my OH still thinks the move is too much and too far.... how do i persuade him to try a holiday for starters.... by the time he agrees, we'll be ready for our pensions.... it's like waiting for god! HELP:thumbsup:

squiddley Sep 2nd 2008 12:25 pm

Re: how to convince the other half?
 
Good question.....:confused:
We are in the process of going.May be get as much information together as possible ,go for a recci/ holiday.. These are the things we did,but at the end of the day ( i think) their comes a point when you can look no more ,you have to do it...
Better to know than to wonder.....:eek:
Good luck..

big nelly Sep 2nd 2008 12:31 pm

Re: how to convince the other half?
 

Originally Posted by squiddley (Post 6740342)
Good question.....:confused:
We are in the process of going.May be get as much information together as possible ,go for a recci/ holiday.. These are the things we did,but at the end of the day ( i think) their comes a point when you can look no more ,you have to do it...
Better to know than to wonder.....:eek:
Good luck..

I know, that's the problem, he doesn't like flying much either! Men, what can i say!!! I know that he'd love it if i could persuade him to have a holiday, as he's a real outdoor fanatic as is our son...
Are you going for a holiday or permanent move?
I need all the luck i can muster, as i have been trying to persuade him for the past year!

squiddley Sep 2nd 2008 12:51 pm

Re: how to convince the other half?
 

Originally Posted by big nelly (Post 6740360)
I know, that's the problem, he doesn't like flying much either! Men, what can i say!!! I know that he'd love it if i could persuade him to have a holiday, as he's a real outdoor fanatic as is our son...
Are you going for a holiday or permanent move?
I need all the luck i can muster, as i have been trying to persuade him for the past year!

We are going for the peranent move...:eek:
Im not keen on the flying bit either,what we are planing to do is get off half way for a few days to break up the journey..Got children in tow :)..
My wife got cold feet a couple of months ago,which got my alarm bells ringing.. So what i did was' i went for a quick recci,couldn't afford for all of us to go..Took a camcorder and filmed everything and gave a running commentry...on everything i filmed...not so sure i liked the sound of my own voice..:eek: To be honest it turned out quite good i seemed to capture things as they are i suppose..mm maybe put it on u tube one day:lol::lol:

Anyway she liked what she saw,and i think with me being away she had time on her own and made her think as to what she really wants..
Yes it is a long long way away,but it's as far or as close as you want to make it...

Ash1 Sep 2nd 2008 7:58 pm

Re: how to convince the other half?
 

Originally Posted by big nelly (Post 6740256)
Me, i want to move to NZ, my son wants to leave the Uk (unhappy with the violence and scared to do anything without an adult being present) and my OH still thinks the move is too much and too far.... how do i persuade him to try a holiday for starters.... by the time he agrees, we'll be ready for our pensions.... it's like waiting for god! HELP:thumbsup:


Hi,

I wasn`t that keen to move to NZ as I felt that it was too far away but my wife convinced me to come on a recci/ holiday and by the end of 3 weeks I was a changed man. I`m not sure that any amount of pictures/ internet/ TV programmes would have convinced me. So, if you can, I would suggest a holiday/ recci first.

Ash

big nelly Sep 3rd 2008 7:37 am

Re: how to convince the other half?
 
Hi to both of you,

thanks for those words, i feel a lot more convinced that what i think is going to be good, will be... and as you said (perfectly) the world is a lot smaller and will only get smaller too.:rofl:

I am trying to convince Mark that a holiday next year would be perfect, even if it only ends up being a holiday... i just need some tactics on how to convince a stubborn family man that to try a holiday in NZ is for our all benefits.

He's super sporty, especially into running so maybe i need to find out some information regarding that. and football, as after all NZ is supposed to be THE place if you love sport!

thanks, and any other info greatly received.:thumbsup:

techieguy Sep 3rd 2008 7:59 am

Re: how to convince the other half?
 
Sounds like your son has issues and you should seek help for him and move to a better area of the UK if you are worried about violence.

Violence happens in poor areas everywhere on the planet.

big nelly Sep 3rd 2008 8:06 am

Re: how to convince the other half?
 

Originally Posted by techieguy (Post 6743170)
Sounds like your son has issues and you should seek help for him and move to a better area of the UK if you are worried about violence.

Violence happens in poor areas everywhere on the planet.

I realise that, and to be perfectly honest where i live at the present is a small market town, it doesn't have a lot of violence, but as with most places in the UK, it is on the rise. We have our hooded tracksuit wearing unemployed friends to thank for that. We have talked to him and he understands that no matter where you live there will always be someone that doesn't like you for what ever reasons, but when your 13 year doesn't want to walk into town or go and meet up with his friends unless taken by an adult it does become a little worrying.

techieguy Sep 3rd 2008 8:16 am

Re: how to convince the other half?
 
Most places in the UK are not like that. Stop believing all the doom mongering Newspapers!

Trust me emigrating to NZ is not going to solve your sons issues, it will only follow him. Like the couple who think moving away will solve their marriage!

Do you really think NZ has no issues with hoodies, hoons etc...? You are in for a big, expensive shock if you go.

big nelly Sep 3rd 2008 8:31 am

Re: how to convince the other half?
 

Originally Posted by techieguy (Post 6743211)
Most places in the UK are not like that. Stop believing all the doom mongering Newspapers!

Trust me emigrating to NZ is not going to solve your sons issues, it will only follow him. Like the couple who think moving away will solve their marriage!

Do you really think NZ has no issues with hoodies, hoons etc...? You are in for a big, expensive shock if you go.

I don't believe all the doom and gloom in the papers, I also don't believe that the grass is greener and more to the point I am not contemplating a move to the other side of the world because of my son. But I do feel that things are worse here than they have ever been, and I am quite aware that NZ isn't the answer to all my prayers, but I DO think that life will be more relaxed and a safer environment for Luke to grow up in.

Am Loolah Sep 3rd 2008 8:53 am

Re: how to convince the other half?
 

Originally Posted by big nelly (Post 6743252)
I don't believe all the doom and gloom in the papers, I also don't believe that the grass is greener and more to the point I am not contemplating a move to the other side of the world because of my son. But I do feel that things are worse here than they have ever been, and I am quite aware that NZ isn't the answer to all my prayers, but I DO think that life will be more relaxed and a safer environment for Luke to grow up in.

Hi big nelly,

My Hubby is a Kiwi by birth but he wasn't mad keen on us uprooting and moving to NZ with 4 kids. We came on a 3 week holiday and did a reccie in a campervan with the kids. We had lots of travel guides and researched areas in advance so had a good idea of areas we thought we ought to see if we were to move here.

Nearly exactly a year after that holiday we moved - to the area I'd initially thought would be best for all of us - and so far so good. We['ve been here nearly 18 months and we and them kids love it. The weather is way better, the beaches are beautiful, the people are great and for us it has been the best move.:thumbsup:

The streets where we live seem way safer to us, our cul de sac has about 40 kids living in it and we hardly see the 2 youngest, aged 5 and 9, as they are in and out of others houses and play out in the street with all the other kids.

Research, research, research and then come and explore! It's not all doom and gloom here either!

big nelly Sep 3rd 2008 9:22 am

Re: how to convince the other half?
 

Originally Posted by Am Loolah (Post 6743304)
Hi big nelly,

My Hubby is a Kiwi by birth but he wasn't mad keen on us uprooting and moving to NZ with 4 kids. We came on a 3 week holiday and did a reccie in a campervan with the kids. We had lots of travel guides and researched areas in advance so had a good idea of areas we thought we ought to see if we were to move here.

Nearly exactly a year after that holiday we moved - to the area I'd initially thought would be best for all of us - and so far so good. We['ve been here nearly 18 months and we and them kids love it. The weather is way better, the beaches are beautiful, the people are great and for us it has been the best move.:thumbsup:

The streets where we live seem way safer to us, our cul de sac has about 40 kids living in it and we hardly see the 2 youngest, aged 5 and 9, as they are in and out of others houses and play out in the street with all the other kids.

Research, research, research and then come and explore! It's not all doom and gloom here either!

Hey,

Thanks for that! think i may have been told off by techieguy!
I have been looking into areas for a while, and i like the look of Hawkes Bay/Napier.
How was it touring in a camper van? Any advice as to where to stop would be greatfully received. Thats what I'd really like to do for us next year, just need to persuade the OH to flying that far now! that's my next task.
How do your kids find school compared to the UK?

Am Loolah Sep 3rd 2008 9:32 am

Re: how to convince the other half?
 

Originally Posted by big nelly (Post 6743362)
Hey,

Thanks for that! think i may have been told off by techieguy!
I have been looking into areas for a while, and i like the look of Hawkes Bay/Napier.
How was it touring in a camper van? Any advice as to where to stop would be greatfully received. Thats what I'd really like to do for us next year, just need to persuade the OH to flying that far now! that's my next task.
How do your kids find school compared to the UK?

Nah, you've not been told off!! The site exists for people to share info and personal experiences, and what one person loves about something another may detest! Human nature!
We visited Napier in June in a campervan again for a long weekend - fun but freezing! I don't know much about the area to be honest - but Napier is a very pretty place and bigger than I thought it would be. Plus all those wineries can only be a good thing!:cool:

We flew with Air Singapore, an exceptionally good airline. Stop off for a day or two there to recover from the first leg and get some rest.

We used United Campervans who again where excellent. Picked the camper up from their depot near Auckland airport and headed off. We went North from there to Northland, Pahaia (sp?) and the Waitangi Treaty House etc, then headed back to Orewa, then the Coromandel, through to Tauranga and the Mount, then Rotorua, Taupo and raced across to the SI to Kaikoura to see the whales and then it was back up to Auckland. Believe me, you'll never cover as much as you'll think you will when you're looking at the map!

My eldest was 14 when we arrived and she took the longest to settle and make new friends - I think that's pretty much to be expected. But in all, about 4 months and she was sorted, so not too long at all. Plus she was the one who wasn't keen on the move in the first place. If your son is keen he'll probably be fine!

big nelly Sep 3rd 2008 9:40 am

Re: how to convince the other half?
 
I am kind of looking at coming next summer, it gives us time to save enough cash to enjoy the holiday.... although i am now debating whether to come in the winter time then i suppose you get an idea of just how bad a place can be when it's grey and miserable.... torn again!;)

I've heard good reports about Singapore Airlines, so i think that will be my next port of call, work out the cost for the 3 of us then the camper van, the other 2 will love that!

I haven't really made a game plan about where to visit yet, so any reccommendations are welcome, especially for an outdoor man and son! both of who are football mad along with most other sports.

Have all your kids settled into the NZ way of life and do they miss anything in particular about their old life in the UK?

Am Loolah Sep 3rd 2008 10:22 am

Re: how to convince the other half?
 
We came April/May so Autumn here and I found we'd packed too many clothes for chillier weather so we had to buy shorts and t-shirts when we got here!:thumbup: Plus we took the kids out of school as soooo much cheaper to travel. The eldest's Headmaster refused us permission, so we wrote to him and told him why we were coming and he gave us his blessing then!!

You'd probably have to decide on areas yourself - we haven't done the South Island at all, we didn't have time to do Wellington or any of the West coast. We loved everywhere we visited and all you hear of my dulcet tones on the DVD's are "Oooo, I could live here ... " :o

http://www.singaporeair.com/saa/index.jsp

http://www.campervan.co.nz

Plus I found the Lonely Planet guidebook and also the AA guide to NZ valuable. Perhaps you could look at getting along to one of the Expo's in Leeds or London next month with your Hubby and son, probably be quite valuable.


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