Homesick!

Old Apr 15th 2007, 8:00 am
  #31  
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Default Re: Homesick!

Well I thought I was the only one who would admit I was homesick !!! We have been here 18 months now and OH (Kiwi) and I have decided to go back to Blighty.

I think for me I was never unhappy in the UK, we lived in the a beautiful part (Cotswolds) had GREAT friends, fantastic jobs but hubby thought this would would be better, oh hindsight you are a wonderful thing !!

Since being here, it took me 6 months to get my first job, I am now on my third, never had so many jobs in a short space of time, the dog died, we've been burgled, a display stand in The Warehouse collapsed and bruised my face and chipped a tooth (just before Xmas), try finding a dentist a day before Christmas and everyone I speak to makes me out to be a villain because I want to go home !!!!!!

Okay people I admit it, I'm English, what's so wrong about that, NZ is a lovely country, has good & bad things about but where doesn't but deep down I miss my home.

I wish anyone the best of luck to try it, I'm glad I did but I am not too proud to say to isn't for me and now I am saving really hard to get back next year.
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Old Apr 15th 2007, 11:32 pm
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Default Re: Homesick!

Originally Posted by sharronemery
Well I thought I was the only one who would admit I was homesick !!! We have been here 18 months now and OH (Kiwi) and I have decided to go back to Blighty.

I think for me I was never unhappy in the UK, we lived in the a beautiful part (Cotswolds) had GREAT friends, fantastic jobs but hubby thought this would would be better, oh hindsight you are a wonderful thing !!

Since being here, it took me 6 months to get my first job, I am now on my third, never had so many jobs in a short space of time, the dog died, we've been burgled, a display stand in The Warehouse collapsed and bruised my face and chipped a tooth (just before Xmas), try finding a dentist a day before Christmas and everyone I speak to makes me out to be a villain because I want to go home !!!!!!

Okay people I admit it, I'm English, what's so wrong about that, NZ is a lovely country, has good & bad things about but where doesn't but deep down I miss my home.

I wish anyone the best of luck to try it, I'm glad I did but I am not too proud to say to isn't for me and now I am saving really hard to get back next year.
Oh dear it does sound like you have had a run of bad luck

Good luck in the future and lets hope you have a better time in your remainder of your time here, then it wont all be bad memories

Dawn
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Old Apr 16th 2007, 12:59 am
  #33  
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Default Re: Homesick!

Originally Posted by sharronemery
Well I thought I was the only one who would admit I was homesick !!! We have been here 18 months now and OH (Kiwi) and I have decided to go back to Blighty.

I think for me I was never unhappy in the UK, we lived in the a beautiful part (Cotswolds) had GREAT friends, fantastic jobs but hubby thought this would would be better, oh hindsight you are a wonderful thing !!

Since being here, it took me 6 months to get my first job, I am now on my third, never had so many jobs in a short space of time, the dog died, we've been burgled, a display stand in The Warehouse collapsed and bruised my face and chipped a tooth (just before Xmas), try finding a dentist a day before Christmas and everyone I speak to makes me out to be a villain because I want to go home !!!!!!

Okay people I admit it, I'm English, what's so wrong about that, NZ is a lovely country, has good & bad things about but where doesn't but deep down I miss my home.

I wish anyone the best of luck to try it, I'm glad I did but I am not too proud to say to isn't for me and now I am saving really hard to get back next year.
It takes courage to admit you want to go back home, some people will
think you're not adaptable enough, others will think you love to find fault
with things. I'm in a similar situation where I came to live here not because
I thought it would be better, but because of personal circumstances.
It makes homesickness worse, doesn't it, when you really loved where
you used to live.
I worry too about explaining myself, because it really does not suffice to
say, "NZ is not for me" because your friends and family will want to know
why. Just as on this forum if you become specific about why you would
rather live back home, beyond the obvious reasons of missing family and
friends, your opinions can be taken as complaining or that you feel
somehow superior to people who want to stay.
Take heart, though. Even the statistics put out by NZ immigration show
that nearly half of all British immigrants return to the UK within the first
5 years. I wonder how many stay simply because they can no longer
afford to leave? I know, from reading through the archives, that some of
our most adamant lovers and defenders of NZ lifestyle did not sound so
sanguine when they first arrived, and it seems they stayed simply
because they resigned themselves to it. It is also no secret that
the numbers of NZers that choose to live elsewhere is huge.
Good luck with your saving!
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Old Apr 16th 2007, 4:59 am
  #34  
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Default Re: Homesick!

Originally Posted by The Weezer
It takes courage to admit you want to go back home, some people will
think you're not adaptable enough, others will think you love to find fault
with things. I'm in a similar situation where I came to live here not because
I thought it would be better, but because of personal circumstances.
It makes homesickness worse, doesn't it, when you really loved where
you used to live.
I worry too about explaining myself, because it really does not suffice to
say, "NZ is not for me" because your friends and family will want to know
why. Just as on this forum if you become specific about why you would
rather live back home, beyond the obvious reasons of missing family and
friends, your opinions can be taken as complaining or that you feel
somehow superior to people who want to stay.
Take heart, though. Even the statistics put out by NZ immigration show
that nearly half of all British immigrants return to the UK within the first
5 years. I wonder how many stay simply because they can no longer
afford to leave? I know, from reading through the archives, that some of
our most adamant lovers and defenders of NZ lifestyle did not sound so
sanguine when they first arrived, and it seems they stayed simply
because they resigned themselves to it. It is also no secret that
the numbers of NZers that choose to live elsewhere is huge.
Good luck with your saving!
I see you are in Sth Auckland so you are not far from us, we're in Whitford. So what brought you here, it was interesting to hear your comments, it almost sounded like me !!
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Old Apr 16th 2007, 5:34 am
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Default Re: Homesick!

Originally Posted by sharronemery
I see you are in Sth Auckland so you are not far from us, we're in Whitford. So what brought you here, it was interesting to hear your comments, it almost sounded like me !!
Whitford is one of the nicest suburbs in all of Auckland, I think! Reminds
me *a little* of home. I couldn't afford to live there though.
I came to live with my boyfriend, a NZer. We live in South Auckland
because he owns the house mortgage-free. And we have a section
that's a little over 1/4 acre, a relative rarity these days so close
to downtown Auckland.
We don't move, because to live in a place with as much land and privacy
would be prohibitively expensive for us, as neither of us wants to go
into debt. Also our kitchen is very large for a NZ house, and our bedroom
is huge, probably owing to the fact that this house was owned by
Americans in the 70's.
We also won't move now because we are saving to go back to my home.
I feel the longer I live here, the less it seems to appeal to me.

I think so many of the posts by people who are disillusioned by their
life in NZ sound similar. It's not just complaining because they are specific
about what they find lacking, or what has not turned out to be
as advertised. I have a long time friend, a NZer who has lived in the US
for nearly thirty years. He always spoke of the "quality of life" in NZ, yet
he will probably never return, and his nephew's goal is to marry an American
to get US citizenship, so go figure.

Even though you live in one of the nicer parts of Auckland, I can imagine
why you would want to go home. As a child, reading about the Costwolds
in National Geographic or seeing it on TV, I always thought of it as a
remarkable place for it's beauty and history. And you can't beat the
cultural richness of England (or Europe or the US for that matter). To me
it is an essential part of real quality of life. Imagine being able to read
an excellent newspaper while you eat your breakfast! You just
can't beat a good read. Or to feel you are living in the world, and partaking
if only vicariously, in the world of ideas and cultural trends.
Living here right now, I can only imagine it. You just can't spend all
your time on the internet trying to feel as if you have not dropped off
the face the world.
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Old Apr 16th 2007, 7:28 am
  #36  
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Default Re: Homesick!

Originally Posted by The Weezer
Whitford is one of the nicest suburbs in all of Auckland, I think! Reminds
me *a little* of home. I couldn't afford to live there though.
I came to live with my boyfriend, a NZer. We live in South Auckland
because he owns the house mortgage-free. And we have a section
that's a little over 1/4 acre, a relative rarity these days so close
to downtown Auckland.
We don't move, because to live in a place with as much land and privacy
would be prohibitively expensive for us, as neither of us wants to go
into debt. Also our kitchen is very large for a NZ house, and our bedroom
is huge, probably owing to the fact that this house was owned by
Americans in the 70's.
We also won't move now because we are saving to go back to my home.
I feel the longer I live here, the less it seems to appeal to me.

I think so many of the posts by people who are disillusioned by their
life in NZ sound similar. It's not just complaining because they are specific
about what they find lacking, or what has not turned out to be
as advertised. I have a long time friend, a NZer who has lived in the US
for nearly thirty years. He always spoke of the "quality of life" in NZ, yet
he will probably never return, and his nephew's goal is to marry an American
to get US citizenship, so go figure.

Even though you live in one of the nicer parts of Auckland, I can imagine
why you would want to go home. As a child, reading about the Costwolds
in National Geographic or seeing it on TV, I always thought of it as a
remarkable place for it's beauty and history. And you can't beat the
cultural richness of England (or Europe or the US for that matter). To me
it is an essential part of real quality of life. Imagine being able to read
an excellent newspaper while you eat your breakfast! You just
can't beat a good read. Or to feel you are living in the world, and partaking
if only vicariously, in the world of ideas and cultural trends.
Living here right now, I can only imagine it. You just can't spend all
your time on the internet trying to feel as if you have not dropped off
the face the world.
Yes we are lucky where we live although we do not own our house only rent.

Hubby's family moved from Auckland last year to Te Aroha, I find it difficult to think that I want to go back when hubby's family is here. The joys of meeting someone from a different country I suppose ??

So where were you from the UK ?? are your family still there ?? How does your partner feel about going to live in UK ?? Will you sell the house here or rent it out ?? When will you be going back ??

I always thought it was harder for me as I am 40 "ish" and set in my ways but it is good to know, as I said in my first post, that I am not the only one who feels as I do.

I agree about the cultural diversity of Europe and the UK and I miss it, but at least we will get a taste of it next month, we are back in old blighty for a holiday. The only problem will be getting back on that plane, I think hubby will have to drag me on kicking and screaming but heh ho.

Maybe we should meet up and have a glass or two to drown our sorrows ???
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Old Apr 16th 2007, 10:03 am
  #37  
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Default Re: Homesick!

Originally Posted by sharronemery
Yes we are lucky where we live although we do not own our house only rent.

Hubby's family moved from Auckland last year to Te Aroha, I find it difficult to think that I want to go back when hubby's family is here. The joys of meeting someone from a different country I suppose ??

So where were you from the UK ?? are your family still there ?? How does your partner feel about going to live in UK ?? Will you sell the house here or rent it out ?? When will you be going back ??

I always thought it was harder for me as I am 40 "ish" and set in my ways but it is good to know, as I said in my first post, that I am not the only one who feels as I do.

I agree about the cultural diversity of Europe and the UK and I miss it, but at least we will get a taste of it next month, we are back in old blighty for a holiday. The only problem will be getting back on that plane, I think hubby will have to drag me on kicking and screaming but heh ho.

Maybe we should meet up and have a glass or two to drown our sorrows ???
I'm not from the UK. I was born in Ecuador but grew up in New Jersey.
I read the posts on this site because there really is no place, other than
the NZ immigration website, to post for someone like me. There are very
few Americans here, even fewer Latin Americans.
My boyfriend lived in the UK briefly, and luckily he's not adverse to living
in the States. He doesn't have a large family, and they live on the
South Island, so we don't see them much anyway.
He has spent a lot of time with me in the US, and seems to like the
diversity, not just of the people, but also the culture, landscapes, scenery.
He said about the eastern US, "I've never seen so many trees before!"
And the plain comfort of life there as compared to here is something
he's noticed.

We don't know if we'll sell or rent. Considering our neighborhood, it would
be hard to imagine finding someone we could trust with the property.

I will go back as soon as possible, perhaps as early as the end of the year.
My boyfriend has a business, so that's not something
he can leave quite so soon, but we will work something out.
I know what you mean about the plane ride back. Very hard to say
goodbye to everyone again, isn't it?

PM me if you want to meet up.
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Old Apr 16th 2007, 8:45 pm
  #38  
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Default Re: Homesick!

Hi sharronemery & The Weezer. I just wanted to say to you guys that I for one do value what you have to say. We have been looking at emigrating to NZ for quite some time, and have been on various websites, and subscribed to an NZ emigrate newspaper etc. and this site is the only place that I have found that does give a more honest view of what to expect. So much so, that we have now stopped thinking that we are emigrating and are instead now making the move to live in NZ for a few years to try it out. If we end up staying that will be great as it will mean NZ has proved, for us, to be a better place to bring up our children, but, if after a couple of years we do want to come home, we shall look upon it all as one hell of an adventure and have now feelings of failure. I think that this is probably a more realistic view to take, and mentally a more healthy view to have if we do want to come home again. And, have only developed this view from reading stories like yours.
Good luck to you both! I think you are both brave people who have had the courage to move overseas and are lucky enough to have found where you will truly be comfortable. And, you will never been sitting there in 20 years time wondering what if!
Best wishes, Leighlou.
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Old Apr 18th 2007, 9:54 am
  #39  
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Default Re: Homesick!

Originally Posted by Leighlou
Hi sharronemery & The Weezer. I just wanted to say to you guys that I for one do value what you have to say. We have been looking at emigrating to NZ for quite some time, and have been on various websites, and subscribed to an NZ emigrate newspaper etc. and this site is the only place that I have found that does give a more honest view of what to expect. So much so, that we have now stopped thinking that we are emigrating and are instead now making the move to live in NZ for a few years to try it out. If we end up staying that will be great as it will mean NZ has proved, for us, to be a better place to bring up our children, but, if after a couple of years we do want to come home, we shall look upon it all as one hell of an adventure and have now feelings of failure. I think that this is probably a more realistic view to take, and mentally a more healthy view to have if we do want to come home again. And, have only developed this view from reading stories like yours.
Good luck to you both! I think you are both brave people who have had the courage to move overseas and are lucky enough to have found where you will truly be comfortable. And, you will never been sitting there in 20 years time wondering what if!
Best wishes, Leighlou.
well good on you, I think it is a great way to look at it and try it. I wish you all the best of luck
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Old Apr 18th 2007, 10:16 am
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Default Re: Homesick!

We were homesick in the uk before we emigrated here .Sick of the violence ,sick of the car crime ,sick of the burglaries,sick of the way it was in general sick of BLIAR yes spelt like that as he is a LIAR .Dont miss it one bit just my mates and close family but we keep in touch a lot and they are coming here to visit to see how good it is so stick it out and remember why you did it in the first place .This country has a lot going for it ,more than the down sides that UK has .We love it here and when I ask my OH if she wants to go to the UK to see her family she says NO THANKS its a waste of dollars visit us if you want but to go back on a whim no way.Here to stay.
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Old Apr 24th 2007, 1:58 am
  #41  
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Default Re: Homesick!

Hi I'm new to this forum and I've taken heart reading other people's stories. I've only been here 9 weeks and homesickness is kicking in. My kids (7 &10)aren't settling in to their schools very well (say the works too hard). They've both gone up a year at school and the literacy seems a lot harder than in the UK. I'm in the Wellington area if anyone else is out there.

I feel very isolated at the moment and am wondering whether I've done the right thing. My husbands really happy which makes it even harder for me.

We've got all our stuff and bought a house but it doesn't feel like home. The neighborhood is very nice and people seem friendly enough but I just want to stop feeling so low.

I have joined the local running club which is good and I've got a few contacts through the kids school/clubs.

Any advice would be great.

Michelle
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Old Apr 24th 2007, 3:58 am
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Default Re: Homesick!

Originally Posted by Midge71
Hi I'm new to this forum and I've taken heart reading other people's stories. I've only been here 9 weeks and homesickness is kicking in. My kids (7 &10)aren't settling in to their schools very well (say the works too hard). They've both gone up a year at school and the literacy seems a lot harder than in the UK. I'm in the Wellington area if anyone else is out there.

I feel very isolated at the moment and am wondering whether I've done the right thing. My husbands really happy which makes it even harder for me.

We've got all our stuff and bought a house but it doesn't feel like home. The neighborhood is very nice and people seem friendly enough but I just want to stop feeling so low.

I have joined the local running club which is good and I've got a few contacts through the kids school/clubs.

Any advice would be great.

Michelle
Hi Michelle,
Why dont you move your kids into the year below, my daughters 13 and should have gone to college for her age. We spoke to the college principal who was from England and he advised us to put her into year 8 Intermediatte school. Year 8 was actually the year she was in when we left England in November. Whilst she does'nt find the work hard i new this was exactly the right place for her. My other 2 children went into the same year they were in when we left. When the kids are happier you will be. I find it hard especially as i need a job but cant find one to fit in with school holidays. I always said we would give it a year before making any desicions. Good Luck
Carole
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Old Apr 24th 2007, 4:09 am
  #43  
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Default Re: Homesick!

Originally Posted by Midge71
Hi I'm new to this forum and I've taken heart reading other people's stories. I've only been here 9 weeks and homesickness is kicking in. My kids (7 &10)aren't settling in to their schools very well (say the works too hard). They've both gone up a year at school and the literacy seems a lot harder than in the UK. I'm in the Wellington area if anyone else is out there.

I feel very isolated at the moment and am wondering whether I've done the right thing. My husbands really happy which makes it even harder for me.

We've got all our stuff and bought a house but it doesn't feel like home. The neighborhood is very nice and people seem friendly enough but I just want to stop feeling so low.

I have joined the local running club which is good and I've got a few contacts through the kids school/clubs.

Any advice would be great.

Michelle
Hi Michelle,

Sorry you are feeling down. Hoping you feel better soon. I am up & down like a tart's knickers!! There are no easy answers & I certainly haven't got them . I will be in touch more soon, just moving into our house this week, so life is very hectic. Hang in there Michelle.
love Annie
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Old Apr 24th 2007, 5:57 am
  #44  
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Default Re: Homesick!

Hey Midge71
We are in the Wellington area too and have definately had our highs and lows. We've been here for 7 months and we try to see it as an adventure rather than permanent. Can't really make a decision yet as there is still so much we miss about old Blighty. Anyway you're not alone and we would be more than happy to meet up sometime, to compare notes!

All the best for now
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Old Apr 24th 2007, 5:59 am
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Default Re: Homesick!

Originally Posted by sharronemery

I think for me I was never unhappy in the UK, we lived in the a beautiful part (Cotswolds) had GREAT friends, fantastic jobs but hubby thought this would would be better, oh hindsight you are a wonderful thing !!
I think this is an important lesson for everyone. Why on earth haul yourself over to the other side of the world if you have a good life in the first place?

It reminds me of the Peanuts cartoon where Charlie Brown tells Lucy about 'the other side of the hill'. He tells her that when he grows up he plans to travel over the hill (that he can see in the distance) and when he gets to the other side his life will be full of happiness.

Lucy asks him "What if there is somebody on the other side of that hill thinking the same thing now?"

Charlie Brown yells "DON'T DO IT"!!!!!!

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