Got a bit of a story to tell..........
Jun 8th 2009, 11:58 am
#256
no stressin no fussin....
Joined: Aug 2007
Location: Fantasy Island....
Posts: 12,616
Re: Got a bit of a story to tell..........
So......then Ian's dad decides to come over to Australia as a surprise to Ian. As we know, this was a really big surprise as his dad had made no effort to see Ian when he'd returned to UK
Anyway, Ian's dad turns up on Ian's doorstep in Brissy. It was the biggest shock of Ian's life.
His dad had had a sex change
It turns out that the year before when Sharon had been on the Trisha show, Ian's dad was on there in support of Sharon and all hell broke loose as his dad confessed to being a secret transexual
So, there was Ian at the front door, his dad...err no mum...er dad...anyway, this rough looking woman stood at the door
"hello son - long time no see"
Ian stood there dumbfounded
"hi dad, what the **** have you done with your hair, and is that Avon eye makeup you're wearing cos you look like that blond bird from Abba, only in her 70's"
So Ian ushers his dad, er mum, err no dad into the front room. Thankfully Sharon was out with the triplets so they were able to catch up.
"What's bloody happened to you dad?" Ian said
"well son, and by the way I think you should refer to me as your older sister from now on, you know, just in case anyone should ask like - well, the thing is the reason I seemed distant before when you came to UK was because it was a shock you turning up. I was about to go for my sex change operation and you bloody turn up outta the blue"
"oh God, I can't believe it dad, er sis...please tell me I'm dreaming?' said Ian
"No son, you're not dreaming. Haven't you noticed I've had me tits done?"
To be continued....... [Ian will you chuffin come back, I'm keeping the fort up here mate
Anyway, Ian's dad turns up on Ian's doorstep in Brissy. It was the biggest shock of Ian's life.
His dad had had a sex change
It turns out that the year before when Sharon had been on the Trisha show, Ian's dad was on there in support of Sharon and all hell broke loose as his dad confessed to being a secret transexual
So, there was Ian at the front door, his dad...err no mum...er dad...anyway, this rough looking woman stood at the door
"hello son - long time no see"
Ian stood there dumbfounded
"hi dad, what the **** have you done with your hair, and is that Avon eye makeup you're wearing cos you look like that blond bird from Abba, only in her 70's"
So Ian ushers his dad, er mum, err no dad into the front room. Thankfully Sharon was out with the triplets so they were able to catch up.
"What's bloody happened to you dad?" Ian said
"well son, and by the way I think you should refer to me as your older sister from now on, you know, just in case anyone should ask like - well, the thing is the reason I seemed distant before when you came to UK was because it was a shock you turning up. I was about to go for my sex change operation and you bloody turn up outta the blue"
"oh God, I can't believe it dad, er sis...please tell me I'm dreaming?' said Ian
"No son, you're not dreaming. Haven't you noticed I've had me tits done?"
To be continued....... [Ian will you chuffin come back, I'm keeping the fort up here mate
Jun 8th 2009, 12:09 pm
#257
Chan eil aon chànan gu le
Joined: Feb 2009
Location: On the ning nang nong
Posts: 22,437
Re: Got a bit of a story to tell..........
So then Ian drags his dad/sis into the house from sheer embarrasment as he doesn't want the neighbours to see him talking to the blonde bird from abba in her 70's.
Ian goes into the toilet for a shifty fag to calm his nerves, meanwhile his dad decides that after a long flight he needs a change of clothes and a make up freshner, so - he checks out Sharon's new wardrobe and decides to try on a few things - and think what the hell and goes for one of Sharon's stripper outfits - the red pvc bubble gum dress that just fits past the arse,followed by the prostitute killer heels.
OMG i look fab in these Ian's dad twirls and winks in the mirror - i need some red lippy now to match, and off he trots downstairs.....
To be greeted by Sharon and her entourage of religious do gooder pals from the mother and toddler group that she brought home for afternoon tea!
Cue Ian coming down stairs now.........
Ian goes into the toilet for a shifty fag to calm his nerves, meanwhile his dad decides that after a long flight he needs a change of clothes and a make up freshner, so - he checks out Sharon's new wardrobe and decides to try on a few things - and think what the hell and goes for one of Sharon's stripper outfits - the red pvc bubble gum dress that just fits past the arse,followed by the prostitute killer heels.
OMG i look fab in these Ian's dad twirls and winks in the mirror - i need some red lippy now to match, and off he trots downstairs.....
To be greeted by Sharon and her entourage of religious do gooder pals from the mother and toddler group that she brought home for afternoon tea!
Cue Ian coming down stairs now.........
Jun 8th 2009, 12:10 pm
#258
Niamh,Paul + 4 :)
Joined: Jul 2007
Location: sunshine coast, now back home in Ireland :)
Posts: 1,861
Re: Got a bit of a story to tell..........
So......then Ian's dad decides to come over to Australia as a surprise to Ian. As we know, this was a really big surprise as his dad had made no effort to see Ian when he'd returned to UK
Anyway, Ian's dad turns up on Ian's doorstep in Brissy. It was the biggest shock of Ian's life.
His dad had had a sex change
It turns out that the year before when Sharon had been on the Trisha show, Ian's dad was on there in support of Sharon and all hell broke loose as his dad confessed to being a secret transexual
So, there was Ian at the front door, his dad...err no mum...er dad...anyway, this rough looking woman stood at the door
"hello son - long time no see"
Ian stood there dumbfounded
"hi dad, what the **** have you done with your hair, and is that Avon eye makeup you're wearing cos you look like that blond bird from Abba, only in her 70's"
So Ian ushers his dad, er mum, err no dad into the front room. Thankfully Sharon was out with the triplets so they were able to catch up.
"What's bloody happened to you dad?" Ian said
"well son, and by the way I think you should refer to me as your older sister from now on, you know, just in case anyone should ask like - well, the thing is the reason I seemed distant before when you came to UK was because it was a shock you turning up. I was about to go for my sex change operation and you bloody turn up outta the blue"
"oh God, I can't believe it dad, er sis...please tell me I'm dreaming?' said Ian
"No son, you're not dreaming. Haven't you noticed I've had me tits done?"
To be continued....... [Ian will you chuffin come back, I'm keeping the fort up here mate
Anyway, Ian's dad turns up on Ian's doorstep in Brissy. It was the biggest shock of Ian's life.
His dad had had a sex change
It turns out that the year before when Sharon had been on the Trisha show, Ian's dad was on there in support of Sharon and all hell broke loose as his dad confessed to being a secret transexual
So, there was Ian at the front door, his dad...err no mum...er dad...anyway, this rough looking woman stood at the door
"hello son - long time no see"
Ian stood there dumbfounded
"hi dad, what the **** have you done with your hair, and is that Avon eye makeup you're wearing cos you look like that blond bird from Abba, only in her 70's"
So Ian ushers his dad, er mum, err no dad into the front room. Thankfully Sharon was out with the triplets so they were able to catch up.
"What's bloody happened to you dad?" Ian said
"well son, and by the way I think you should refer to me as your older sister from now on, you know, just in case anyone should ask like - well, the thing is the reason I seemed distant before when you came to UK was because it was a shock you turning up. I was about to go for my sex change operation and you bloody turn up outta the blue"
"oh God, I can't believe it dad, er sis...please tell me I'm dreaming?' said Ian
"No son, you're not dreaming. Haven't you noticed I've had me tits done?"
To be continued....... [Ian will you chuffin come back, I'm keeping the fort up here mate
Jun 8th 2009, 12:29 pm
#259
no stressin no fussin....
Joined: Aug 2007
Location: Fantasy Island....
Posts: 12,616
Re: Got a bit of a story to tell..........
So then Ian drags his dad/sis into the house from sheer embarrasment as he doesn't want the neighbours to see him talking to the blonde bird from abba in her 70's.
Ian goes into the toilet for a shifty fag to calm his nerves, meanwhile his dad decides that after a long flight he needs a change of clothes and a make up freshner, so - he checks out Sharon's new wardrobe and decides to try on a few things - and think what the hell and goes for one of Sharon's stripper outfits - the red pvc bubble gum dress that just fits past the arse,followed by the prostitute killer heels.
OMG i look fab in these Ian's dad twirls and winks in the mirror - i need some red lippy now to match, and off he trots downstairs.....
To be greeted by Sharon and her entourage of religious do gooder pals from the mother and toddler group that she brought home for afternoon tea!
Cue Ian coming down stairs now.........
Ian goes into the toilet for a shifty fag to calm his nerves, meanwhile his dad decides that after a long flight he needs a change of clothes and a make up freshner, so - he checks out Sharon's new wardrobe and decides to try on a few things - and think what the hell and goes for one of Sharon's stripper outfits - the red pvc bubble gum dress that just fits past the arse,followed by the prostitute killer heels.
OMG i look fab in these Ian's dad twirls and winks in the mirror - i need some red lippy now to match, and off he trots downstairs.....
To be greeted by Sharon and her entourage of religious do gooder pals from the mother and toddler group that she brought home for afternoon tea!
Cue Ian coming down stairs now.........
The religious do-gooders are amazed at the vision in the red PVC bubblegum dress and one of them asks
"hey Sheila, are you that bird out of Abba, I didn't realise you were in your 70's"
Before Ian had chance to respond, Sharon replied
"meet my sister Crystal"
Crystal walked over to the group of latter day moron's and shook them by the hand
"hi my name's Crystal and I'm pleased to meet you all"
Crystal was amazed that no one seemed to flinch, but then these were morons and not known for their dress sense.
"Oh, I forgot to mention" said Crystal "I have brought someone with me from UK"
Ian and Sharon looked at each other, the Morons were already in the drinks cupboard helping themselves to bottles of wine which they were swigging out of the bottle...
"Who? Who have you brought with you?" said Sharon and Ian in unison
Crystal opened the front door and went out to her car, she opened the door and suddenly Ian and Sharon gasped.
Sat in the car was Prince Charles
"what the"
said Ian with an amazed and gobsmacked look on his face ..Sharon just stood there like a fish with it's gob open...
"say hello to Ian and Sharon" said Crystal "he's left Camilla for little ole me
"...she said.....
Last edited by sonlymewalter; Jun 8th 2009 at 12:32 pm.
Jun 8th 2009, 12:47 pm
#260
Chan eil aon chànan gu le
Joined: Feb 2009
Location: On the ning nang nong
Posts: 22,437
Re: Got a bit of a story to tell..........
Sharon has a look of horror on her face
The religious do-gooders are amazed at the vision in the red PVC bubblegum dress and one of them asks
"hey Sheila, are you that bird out of Abba, I didn't realise you were in your 70's"
Before Ian had chance to respond, Sharon replied
"meet my sister Crystal"
Crystal walked over to the group of latter day moron's and shook them by the hand
"hi my name's Crystal and I'm pleased to meet you all"
Crystal was amazed that no one seemed to flinch, but then these were morons and not known for their dress sense.
"Oh, I forgot to mention" said Crystal "I have brought someone with me from UK"
Ian and Sharon looked at each other, the Morons were already in the drinks cupboard helping themselves to bottles of wine which they were swigging out of the bottle...
"Who? Who have you brought with you?" said Sharon and Ian in unison
Crystal opened the front door and went out to her car, she opened the door and suddenly Ian and Sharon gasped.
Sat in the car was Prince Charles
"what the"
said Ian with an amazed and gobsmacked look on his face ..Sharon just stood there like a fish with it's gob open...
"say hello to Ian and Sharon" said Crystal "he's left Camilla for little ole me"...she said.....
The religious do-gooders are amazed at the vision in the red PVC bubblegum dress and one of them asks
"hey Sheila, are you that bird out of Abba, I didn't realise you were in your 70's"
Before Ian had chance to respond, Sharon replied
"meet my sister Crystal"
Crystal walked over to the group of latter day moron's and shook them by the hand
"hi my name's Crystal and I'm pleased to meet you all"
Crystal was amazed that no one seemed to flinch, but then these were morons and not known for their dress sense.
"Oh, I forgot to mention" said Crystal "I have brought someone with me from UK"
Ian and Sharon looked at each other, the Morons were already in the drinks cupboard helping themselves to bottles of wine which they were swigging out of the bottle...
"Who? Who have you brought with you?" said Sharon and Ian in unison
Crystal opened the front door and went out to her car, she opened the door and suddenly Ian and Sharon gasped.
Sat in the car was Prince Charles
"what the"
said Ian with an amazed and gobsmacked look on his face ..Sharon just stood there like a fish with it's gob open...
"say hello to Ian and Sharon" said Crystal "he's left Camilla for little ole me
"...she said.....So Ian screams a little boy scream and flinches, Sharon faints and the Morons scream with delight and clap their hands excitedly in unison, one of them even has an accident and has to rush upstairs to fix in a tena lady. It's pandamonium.
Meanwhile, Prince Charles doesn't know where to look and is getting up out his seat to help Cristal tend to SHaron, who has now came round and is now in fits of hysterical laughter, she thinks she has been beamed up to the starship enterprise.
The Morons are pished now and have now raided the fridge looking for munchies -they don't give a $hite about anything and their true colours have shown through now, they are smoking and trying to hand Prince Charlie a ciggy but asks if any of them have a spliff as his nerves are gone to pot (haha) but to no avail so he snatches a whisky bottle from one of the now legless Morons, who is trying her hardest to suck the face right off him, so now Cristal is taken over by a mad rage a"get your hands off him hoe, i'm his bitch now"! then she lunges for the Moron and a big fight starts, and Cristals wig is now off and one of Sharons red prostitute killer heel is broke.
So now Sharon is raging at her red prostitute killer heel and lunges at them both and then the whole street are out watching the fight.
It's chaos now.
Jun 8th 2009, 12:58 pm
#261
no stressin no fussin....
Joined: Aug 2007
Location: Fantasy Island....
Posts: 12,616
Re: Got a bit of a story to tell..........
So Ian screams a little boy scream and flinches, Sharon faints and the Morons scream with delight and clap their hands excitedly in unison, one of them even has an accident and has to rush upstairs to fix in a tena lady. It's pandamonium.
Meanwhile, Prince Charles doesn't know where to look and is getting up out his seat to help Cristal tend to SHaron, who has now came round and is now in fits of hysterical laughter, she thinks she has been beamed up to the starship enterprise.
The Morons are pished now and have now raided the fridge looking for munchies -they don't give a $hite about anything and their true colours have shown through now, they are smoking and trying to hand Prince Charlie a ciggy but asks if any of them have a spliff as his nerves are gone to pot (haha) but to no avail so he snatches a whisky bottle from one of the now legless Morons, who is trying her hardest to suck the face right off him, so now Cristal is taken over by a mad rage a"get your hands off him hoe, i'm his bitch now"! then she lunges for the Moron and a big fight starts, and Cristals wig is now off and one of Sharons red prostitute killer heel is broke.
So now Sharon is raging at her red prostitute killer heel and lunges at them both and then the whole street are out watching the fight.
It's chaos now.
Meanwhile, Prince Charles doesn't know where to look and is getting up out his seat to help Cristal tend to SHaron, who has now came round and is now in fits of hysterical laughter, she thinks she has been beamed up to the starship enterprise.
The Morons are pished now and have now raided the fridge looking for munchies -they don't give a $hite about anything and their true colours have shown through now, they are smoking and trying to hand Prince Charlie a ciggy but asks if any of them have a spliff as his nerves are gone to pot (haha) but to no avail so he snatches a whisky bottle from one of the now legless Morons, who is trying her hardest to suck the face right off him, so now Cristal is taken over by a mad rage a"get your hands off him hoe, i'm his bitch now"! then she lunges for the Moron and a big fight starts, and Cristals wig is now off and one of Sharons red prostitute killer heel is broke.
So now Sharon is raging at her red prostitute killer heel and lunges at them both and then the whole street are out watching the fight.
It's chaos now.
Crystal stood there lopsided with her wig in her hand, one heel broken and hand on her hip and she pulls a cig out of one of gobs of one of the pished Morons "It weren't me that broke it Sharon, I'm not used to heels and I lost me balance"
"Oh Lordy" says Prince Charles "must we discuss this ayt hiur - I woold much rarther gew inside dearest"
He says this whilst clutching hold of Crystals elbow and ushering her in the houseCrystal puts her wig back on cockeyed and everyone follows her and Prince Charles back in to the house, out of the eye of prying neighbours and any photographers.....
Jun 8th 2009, 1:16 pm
#262
Chan eil aon chànan gu le
Joined: Feb 2009
Location: On the ning nang nong
Posts: 22,437
Re: Got a bit of a story to tell..........
"look what you've done to me bloody heels Crystal" Sharon says half dazed and not quite with it due to having just come round after fainting..
Crystal stood there lopsided with her wig in her hand, one heel broken and hand on her hip and she pulls a cig out of one of gobs of one of the pished Morons "It weren't me that broke it Sharon, I'm not used to heels and I lost me balance"
"Oh Lordy" says Prince Charles "must we discuss this ayt hiur - I woold much rarther gew inside dearest" He says this whilst clutching hold of Crystals elbow and ushering her in the house
Crystal puts her wig back on cockeyed and everyone follows her and Prince Charles back in to the house, out of the eye of prying neighbours and any photographers.....
Crystal stood there lopsided with her wig in her hand, one heel broken and hand on her hip and she pulls a cig out of one of gobs of one of the pished Morons "It weren't me that broke it Sharon, I'm not used to heels and I lost me balance"
"Oh Lordy" says Prince Charles "must we discuss this ayt hiur - I woold much rarther gew inside dearest"
He says this whilst clutching hold of Crystals elbow and ushering her in the houseCrystal puts her wig back on cockeyed and everyone follows her and Prince Charles back in to the house, out of the eye of prying neighbours and any photographers.....
Inside the house, after trotting into the kitchen, Ian and Sharon, Charlie boy and Cristal all standing there staring at each other like a scene from the Reservoir Dogs, then Charlie boy blurts out that he loves his new life and would never go back and not to worry cos he'll look after Cristal, the love of his life, as best he can and the they are gonna run off to America and get hitched as soon as his divorce comes through from Camilla.
Cristal then punches the air with delight cos it's the first she heard about any wedding to a handsome Prince!
Meanwhile Ian's workmates have decided to stop by and surprise him to take him out for lunch and just opened the front door and shouted "cooeee, anybody home - ah Ian mate"................
Jun 8th 2009, 1:36 pm
#263
no stressin no fussin....
Joined: Aug 2007
Location: Fantasy Island....
Posts: 12,616
Re: Got a bit of a story to tell..........
So Ian starts by phoning the husbands of the pished morons to come and collect their hoe wives - he just dumped them in the garden and shut the door.
Inside the house, after trotting into the kitchen, Ian and Sharon, Charlie boy and Cristal all standing there staring at each other like a scene from the Reservoir Dogs, then Charlie boy blurts out that he loves his new life and would never go back and not to worry cos he'll look after Cristal, the love of his life, as best he can and the they are gonna run off to America and get hitched as soon as his divorce comes through from Camilla.
Cristal then punches the air with delight cos it's the first she heard about any wedding to a handsome Prince!
Meanwhile Ian's workmates have decided to stop by and surprise him to take him out for lunch and just opened the front door and shouted "cooeee, anybody home - ah Ian mate"................
Inside the house, after trotting into the kitchen, Ian and Sharon, Charlie boy and Cristal all standing there staring at each other like a scene from the Reservoir Dogs, then Charlie boy blurts out that he loves his new life and would never go back and not to worry cos he'll look after Cristal, the love of his life, as best he can and the they are gonna run off to America and get hitched as soon as his divorce comes through from Camilla.
Cristal then punches the air with delight cos it's the first she heard about any wedding to a handsome Prince!
Meanwhile Ian's workmates have decided to stop by and surprise him to take him out for lunch and just opened the front door and shouted "cooeee, anybody home - ah Ian mate"................
Ian composes himself "yeh, hi boys, meet the inlaws Charlie boy & Crystal"
Charles straightens his crevat and Crystal's wig. Crystal gives his crotch a squeeze and Charles tries his hardest to keep a straight face...
"Hey bro, you look familiar" said the Kiwi "Yo, it's the fush un chup man innit" he says........
Jun 8th 2009, 1:52 pm
#264
Chan eil aon chànan gu le
Joined: Feb 2009
Location: On the ning nang nong
Posts: 22,437
Re: Got a bit of a story to tell..........
They stood there, absolutly frozen to the spot mouths wide open. His Kiwi mate opens his mouth first "hey bro, you got company man"
Ian composes himself "yeh, hi boys, meet the inlaws Charlie boy & Crystal"
Charles straightens his crevat and Crystal's wig. Crystal gives his crotch a squeeze and Charles tries his hardest to keep a straight face...
"Hey bro, you look familiar" said the Kiwi "Yo, it's the fush un chup man innit" he says........
Ian composes himself "yeh, hi boys, meet the inlaws Charlie boy & Crystal"
Charles straightens his crevat and Crystal's wig. Crystal gives his crotch a squeeze and Charles tries his hardest to keep a straight face...
"Hey bro, you look familiar" said the Kiwi "Yo, it's the fush un chup man innit" he says........
Ian grimaces and crawls into a hole, the aussie and kiwi and all the other mates glare over at Ian and slowly start to retreat to the door. Ian tries to stop them but the flee and run down the road.
Ian comes back in and headbutts Cristal then takes off one of the red prostitute killer heels and clips him her over the head with it, then disappears upstairs and locks himself in the toilet, talking to himself whilst rocking on the toilet seat.
Sharon is still laughing her head off and heads for the bar cabinet. Charlie boy decided to phone for a helicopter to come and whip Cristal and himself out of this hell hole.
Jun 8th 2009, 2:05 pm
#265
no stressin no fussin....
Joined: Aug 2007
Location: Fantasy Island....
Posts: 12,616
Re: Got a bit of a story to tell..........
Then the aussie mate chips is and nods to Charlie Boy "that's some Sheila you got there Bruce, wheredya pick her up from" and then Sharon cracks up laughing, uncontrollably and then all hell breaks loose as she says, remembering she has now lost the plot - "guess what, she aint a she! well she is now, but that's my father inlaw ha"
Ian grimaces and crawls into a hole, the aussie and kiwi and all the other mates glare over at Ian and slowly start to retreat to the door. Ian tries to stop them but the flee and run down the road.
Ian comes back in and headbutts Cristal then takes off one of the red prostitute killer heels and clips him her over the head with it, then disappears upstairs and locks himself in the toilet, talking to himself whilst rocking on the toilet seat.
Sharon is still laughing her head off and heads for the bar cabinet. Charlie boy decided to phone for a helicopter to come and whip Cristal and himself out of this hell hole.
Ian grimaces and crawls into a hole, the aussie and kiwi and all the other mates glare over at Ian and slowly start to retreat to the door. Ian tries to stop them but the flee and run down the road.
Ian comes back in and headbutts Cristal then takes off one of the red prostitute killer heels and clips him her over the head with it, then disappears upstairs and locks himself in the toilet, talking to himself whilst rocking on the toilet seat.
Sharon is still laughing her head off and heads for the bar cabinet. Charlie boy decided to phone for a helicopter to come and whip Cristal and himself out of this hell hole.
"who the hell can that be?" says Crystal
"Aye deownt know dear" says Charles 'perhaps one ought to arsk the butler to attend ones door"
"you daft sausage" says Crystal rolling her eyes "we aint got no butler" and she hobbles off to anwer the door.
Crystal hobbles to the front door and can see the outline of a female standing there. She opens the door.
There stood in front of her is Camilla,
She'd tied her horse to the gate.
"What have you done with my lovely Charles?" she says clearly upset
. She shouts behind Crystal "Charlie warley, my little darling tampax, what on earth do you think you are doing. Now come back at once or I'll spank your teeny weeny bottykins"
Charles suddenly realises how much he has missed Camilla.He can't remember the last time he had a good spanking and suddenly he heard the Three Degrees on the radio. He saw this as a sign he should be reunited with his lost love
..."Oh Milla dahling" he shouts...
Jun 8th 2009, 2:11 pm
#266
Chan eil aon chànan gu le
Joined: Feb 2009
Location: On the ning nang nong
Posts: 22,437
Re: Got a bit of a story to tell..........
......Suddenly the doorbell rings and Charles & Crystal look at each other
"who the hell can that be?" says Crystal
"Aye deownt know dear" says Charles 'perhaps one ought to arsk the butler to attend ones door"
"you daft sausage" says Crystal rolling her eyes "we aint got no butler" and she hobbles off to anwer the door.
Crystal hobbles to the front door and can see the outline of a female standing there. She opens the door.
There stood in front of her is Camilla,
She'd tied her horse to the gate.
"What have you done with my lovely Charles?" she says clearly upset.
She shouts behind Crystal "Charlie warley, my little darling tampax, what on earth do you think you are doing. Now come back at once or I'll spank your teeny weeny bottykins"
Charles suddenly realises how much he has missed Camilla.He can't remember the last time he had a good spanking and suddenly he heard the Three Degrees on the radio. He saw this as a sign he should be reunited with his lost love...
"Oh Milla dahling" he shouts...
"who the hell can that be?" says Crystal
"Aye deownt know dear" says Charles 'perhaps one ought to arsk the butler to attend ones door"
"you daft sausage" says Crystal rolling her eyes "we aint got no butler" and she hobbles off to anwer the door.
Crystal hobbles to the front door and can see the outline of a female standing there. She opens the door.
There stood in front of her is Camilla,
She'd tied her horse to the gate.
"What have you done with my lovely Charles?" she says clearly upset
. She shouts behind Crystal "Charlie warley, my little darling tampax, what on earth do you think you are doing. Now come back at once or I'll spank your teeny weeny bottykins"
Charles suddenly realises how much he has missed Camilla.He can't remember the last time he had a good spanking and suddenly he heard the Three Degrees on the radio. He saw this as a sign he should be reunited with his lost love
..."Oh Milla dahling" he shouts...
Which he does and screams and sobs like a baby. At this point Ian has had enough, marches back downstairs and phones a taxi for Cristal and throws him out.
Cristal makes his way back to the airport in the bubblegum outfit and prostitute heels and a facefull of smeared makeup.
Ian and Sharon decide it's time to move on somewhere else in Brisbane, hence the fact that no one on here know wtf they are.
So, hurry up Ian and get yer story on, or else we'll keep makin it up hee hee
Jun 8th 2009, 2:22 pm
#267
no stressin no fussin....
Joined: Aug 2007
Location: Fantasy Island....
Posts: 12,616
Re: Got a bit of a story to tell..........
Suddenly Ian wakes up in a swet
Sharon wakes up startled 'what's the matter Ian?" she say's
"I've just had a really bad dream and you'd never believe me if I told you" he said
Ian then got up to go to the loo ....suddenly he slipped on a shoe and red bublegum PVC dress
Night night mate
Sharon wakes up startled 'what's the matter Ian?" she say's
"I've just had a really bad dream and you'd never believe me if I told you"
he saidIan then got up to go to the loo ....suddenly he slipped on a shoe and red bublegum PVC dress
Night night mate
Jun 8th 2009, 2:26 pm
#268
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Joined: Feb 2009
Location: On the ning nang nong
Posts: 22,437
Re: Got a bit of a story to tell..........
Suddenly Ian wakes up in a swet
Sharon wakes up startled 'what's the matter Ian?" she say's
"I've just had a really bad dream and you'd never believe me if I told you" he said
Ian then got up to go to the loo ....suddenly he slipped on a shoe and red bublegum PVC dress
Night night mate
Sharon wakes up startled 'what's the matter Ian?" she say's
"I've just had a really bad dream and you'd never believe me if I told you"
he saidIan then got up to go to the loo ....suddenly he slipped on a shoe and red bublegum PVC dress
Night night mate
nite nite Tomorrow; Sharon's dream
Jun 8th 2009, 2:54 pm
#269
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 3,903
Re: Got a bit of a story to tell..........
I'd believe every word of it but you forgot to have him outselling somebody in something. Could be a new line of stripper poles he had now cornered the entire market on worldwide. Given the stress of worldwide distribution and obviously having a lot to deal with at home I'm sure he's teleporting to work because nobody thought about doing it before.
Jun 8th 2009, 8:57 pm
#270
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Dec 2005
Location: Aberdeen to Wellington point
Posts: 327
Re: Got a bit of a story to tell..........
OMG....Are you 2 pished??? LOL, Bloody good, carry - on..