mr_goodbye

My first post on this site; an introduction seems fitting, even though it's as I've finally managed to get off the island!

I came to NZ in 2005, and knew I'd made a huge mistake within about 4 months of my arrival. This place is cold, isolated, and just plain weird. However, I'd staked almost everything on coming here and it wasn't a financially viable option to turn back.

I won't go on in some sort of long-winded, ranting manner. It's all been said before both here and other places on the net--my story is nothing unique.

But the main thing I've never managed to understand is how some people manage to be so positive about the place? I've only recently found this site, and you all seem to be here--I know how trolling it sounds, but it is a genuine sentiment, the ratio of positive to negative reviews of all things NZ is unusually high here...

That is, I've met countless numbers of migrants (literally hundreds) during my 5 years here, from all over the world, from all walks of life. With the exception of ONLY ONE PERSON, nobody in this group has particularly liked it here. Many of them have left. Admittedly, not everyone was having as rough a time as I was, but still, those are some pretty miserable stats!

So, because I missed it completely and it's now too late to do anything about--as I'm out of here and all--I'm wondering what is the secret to happiness in NZ? What is the magic element that allows one to not only survive here, but thrive? Or, better yet, what is it (and please be explicit) that is actually quantitatively better here than "back home"?

Anyway, just my curiosity. Feel free to ignore as well

Thanks!

MnB

Welcome to the forum Mr Goodbye, sorry you've not found NZ to your liking and things didn't work out for you.....are you heading back to the UK, or off to try somewhere with greener grass?

You might notice from my signature line that I was one of those that didn't settle in NZ and returned home, not because there was anything wrong with NZ but because I hadn't realised how deep my English roots were! So I can't help you with your question.

However, I would just like to add that not all posts on here are positive, but as a forum I've always found the majority of members to be supportive and willing to share their positive experiences or offer advice to help get people who are struggling through difficult times..... its a shame you didn't find us before!

Good luck with your move and things work out for you where ever you're off to.
B x

JohnThePom

I've only been here for four months, so I can't really comment authoritatively - though I find your experience a bit counterintuitive. Is there some commonality amongst the people you met? i.e. were they mainly in a particular area of NZ or worked in a particular field, or spanned a particular age range?

A lot of people emigrate to live their dream and are then disappointed because you can't live a dream just by moving somewhere else. You have to work to make it real when you get there. Many people aren't very good at being realists and we all like a quick fix and unfortunately that often results in disappointment.

New Zealand isn't what I expected it to be, but then I tried very, very, hard not to have too many preconceived ideas, so I'm not disappointed. In fact there are lots of aspects I like about it. It would be incredible if there was nothing that I disliked!

Subjective experiences differ widely. For example you say that NZ is 'cold'.

North of Auckland it rarely freezes, they're reknowned for growing grapes on the South Island. Most of the country averages a couple of degrees warmer than the UK. It's 'cold' if you're comparing it to Australia or the Middle East, it's not so cold if you're comparing it to the UK or to Finland. It's cold if you're used to living in a high temperature centrally heated house with good insulation and move to a poorly heated or draughty or uninsulated or damp or shaded house.

Most of the people that I've heard about that are unhappy, are unhappy because they didn't have as much money as they need for the lifestyle they aspire to, or because they miss their families. That's not really the fault of NZ. In fact I blame the UK for the lifestyle issue. It used to be possible to come over here as a 'cashed up pom' and profit from the exchange rate, but things have changed. You can probably still do that if you own and sell a property in the South East of England, but asset-light immigrants will now find the cost of living comparable or higher and that's as much down to the mismanagement of the UK economy as anything happening here.

I'm also amazed that an immigrant can complain that NZ is isolated after choosing to move here. Isn't that blatantly obvious with just a quick look at a map??? Some people are also unhappy that the infrastructure isn't as good as the places that they have left. Well, welcome to small population countries! For some of us that is part of the appeal!!

angusnz

Hi Mr Goodbye. I too am struggling in New Zealand, however I would love to make a go at it as I have no problems with the country per-say, my partner lived here before an d moved back to the UK, finding that difficult and changed as well, if I could just get a job to start me off I know I would enjoy it here, it has scope and much emptiness to build on. I would hate to have to go back to the UK, except for hols, there's nothing there but misery, even with no job and nowhere to live I cant feel miserable here well not yet anyway.

Assanah

It is usually not the environment that makes people genuine happy but their attitude.