Genesis

I don't think I am any happier here in NZ than I was in the UK. I am certainly more content and don't feel a huge urge to getaway like I did in the Uk...all the time. Sure I would like to live somewhere more beautiful than Palmy and maybe one day I might move to Tazzy, I accept that for little people like us life is a compromise. Thus for now inspite of all my moaning about driving in NZ, the toothless justice system and all the other shite that prevails here we have a good life. Kate's career could not be better. We want for nothing and other than domestic inhouse stress you get with 3 kids sub 10, a puppy and two errant cats life outside our four walls is nigh on perfect. I refer to every day life within our locale. As stated earlier I am well aware of many ugly things about NZ. Fortunately most of them never touch on our lives. Which is nice. I never came to NZ too find happiness as I really believe it comes from within. However I do accept that negative environmental and other anti social issues that are occuring in your ward can have a depressing effect on your well being. Lots about our 'good life' is pretty accidental and just down to good fortune. You never know how good a house or neighbourhood (or town for that matter) will be until you get in all of them and give them a good bit of everyday living. Only with time will you find your place.

Kentish Lass

When we came I assured my family that we would be back often to visit. That was 7 yrs ago when you could get UK to NZ for just over 500 pound return.
The trip from this end, and with earning the NZ dollar, and the high cost of living (the price of dairy products in a dairy community!)makes it impossible for the 4 of us to all go back. Especially when it rockets up around Christmas time when we would love to go back. This can make you feel a bit trapped. The 'you're only 24hours away' makes it seem easy but it isn't. My kids were 9 and 7 years when they left so don't know their grandparents, aunts,uncles etc. They could all pass in the street and not know each other.

Justcol

That in itself is sums up pretty much how i feel.


I'm sure theres a perfect place for me out there somewhere, i just dont feel
the urgancy to go looking for it since arriving in nz

Genesis

Hmm, Palmy is cool just now and works well for all of us. But I guess there is more than 'here'. I have thought about 'doing one' when the kids have left home (if i am still on the mortal coil that is), but does one want to start a new life in your mid 60s? I do hope I have to gumption to go elsewhere, that is assuming we can ever sell our house. Even if we cannot we could rent it out and go and live in Taz for a year and return..or stay longer?

Bo-Jangles

That pretty much sums up my thoughts, we 'stupidly' thought that trips 'home' every two years or so would be affordable. Five years later...... It hurts me mostly; feeling so detached and missing the little ones growing and being constantly aware that there are some family members we are never likely to see ever again.

I would never persuade or advise any one of my friends or family that moving to NZ was a good idea, because I don't think it's all that special and I wouldn't be able to live with myself if they hated it. If any of them were to make any noise or hint of a suggestion of moving here I would most certainly make sure that they scratch off any rosy tints that might be harbouring on their spectacles.

Bo-Jangles

Top post! I agree with you wholeheartedly.

luvwelly

I'm a glass half full person and my immediate nuclear family are the most important thing in life to me so I've never been badly homesick nor truely happy as an expat in either of my locations (I would rather have stayed in UK - was very happy there and only moved for OH's job) but I am pleased that I am an expat in the sense that I am not expatriated forever because I/we didn't have to sell up in UK and never emigrated - although in extending our posting it made sense to get PR, so we did - originally just had work visas as no long-term intention.

I do like it here, am grateful for the different life experience (on a longish but ultimately temporary basis) and have a good quality of life but wouldn't want to stay forever....the distance from everywhere is the main downside for me...I return to UK annually but relatives are getting older and it will be hard when they become ill etc etc

My advice on here over last 3 years has always been 'the grass isn't always greener' and do the sums add up?
Seriously though would a move to another part of UK solve issues less traumatically and financially drastically? I know many people who don't post on here who have returned and there are posters on here who return but don't post to say so because this website tends to be a bit about bolstering the morale of those who have stayed and those who want to come.

luvwelly

Stacey
I think you've selectively read the posts...many people are voicing their regrets which is unusual around here...that's the only reason I bothered to post.
If your Mum is unsure, she shouldn't come...

SweetyStacey

Yes you're right I have selectively read the posts...because I'm taking in the parts that are relavent to me and my parents. Most of the regrets are because of family. We don't get on with our family and we don't see them more than once every three years.

My mums uncertainty is due to her age and making such a big move, incase she doesn't like new zealand.


Stacey

Bo-Jangles

How old Stacey, I get the feeling she's not ancient as some of us?

SweetyStacey

Lol she's not young really. She's turning 50 in April. But then again she has a 30 year old son so that makes her feel young


Stacey

jmh

I'm a born and bred Kiwi and have been away 24 years (with holidays back). I'm glad I had my time away, and I was successful, but with my 50's approaching I am feeling a draw to my family and I want to move home to be amongst my kin (I may hate it and come back - I'm renting out my house in case and will give myself a year to see how I like it). I can't imagine immigrating right now and having to start all over. I want to feel settled as I get older. I want to be able to go to family events, weddings, christenings and so on. Maybe I am closer to my family than your mum is to hers, but I have found I really miss these being so far away in the UK. Don't know if any of that helps, but it's another point of view, but in reverse.

SweetyStacey

Thanks for that. My mum is definately not close to her mum. My mum is desperate for a new start, she's not had a life in 50 years. Our doctors have said that due to the better temperature etc in nz her health will improve more than it will here. The heat will ease her arthritis etc.

To be honest we all need a fresh start, I personally have exhausted all my posibilities of a good life here. I just got out of an engagement this year so I just want to make a clean slate, I may have someone else waiting for my in nz so I'm feeling positive


Stacey

mancaucks

I regret that i was asked as a 16yr old whether i wanted to do come and even with all the info i was given had no idea what i was actually doing. I alos regret that my emotions when i got here cost me my schooling and i've had to do alot of things the hard way.

Do i regret the experience? No, not a chance in hell, i have done some things i never thought i'd do and i've never seen my family happier!

Will i stay here forever? No way, im a citizen next year and then im off while im young to see the world and why not?

I'm just glad that when i do want to be away from the hustle and bustle, and want my kids to have a safe and heathly environment to grow up in, i have one XD

luvwelly

NZ is not wildly hotter than UK. You will likely have a cold damp house and it will make her worse. How would you qualify to come anyway given her age?