First Impressioins
 

I am jetlagged, anxious and can't sleep so please forgive a bit of a moan.

To be fair we have only been here for 24 hours or so, but have experienced the main things that were worrying me in that time as my husband starts work tomorrow (technically today).
House hunting - we had already shortlisted areas and properties, so we had a drive around, spoke to a couple of estate agents and have booked viewing appointments. My main take out is VERY suburban. I never thought I would miss the grubby streets of Tooting, but immediately I am craving the hustle and bustle, public transport, terraced houses in varying degrees of finish and a friend to bump into whenever I leave the house. Where we have looked so far (Greenhithe and Chatswood) actually seem quite scruffy with mostly ugly houses, certainly for the price. Later today we are going to Castor Bay and Hauraki and I have slightly better hopes here. I'm desperate for somewhere with community, even if that means a smaller house. We have a budget of $2m but we're struggling.
The supermarket shop - we did a quick shop at Countdown so I can start cooking some of the meals that the kids are familiar with. We bought food for 4 meals for 2 kids x 2 portions so I can freeze for next week, some cereal, fruit and hummus. $128 with no adult food. Our weekly shop in the UK with meat, a bit of booze, overflowing fruit and veg and treats that we dump in as we go, is £100 at Lidl.
The weather - it's cold - not bone chillingly cold, but uncomfortable and the house is cold. We are staying with my in-laws (another reason why this is all a bit much to take in at the moment) and there is little heating and I didn't bring enough snuggly things. Thanking god for the last minute trip to Trespass and the lightweight puffas I bought us all the day before we left!
Friends. Just that, and probably the hardest of all. We have such a tight network at home but I didn't appreciate this until the end. I am mid 40s and I just don't have the time or inclination to start again. I'm lucky that we have primary aged children, both of whom are passionate about sport, so I will meet people but wonder if I will make good friends.

I am not entirely negative, and once we find a house and move out of the in-laws, our stuff arrives and we get into summer, I'm sure I will feel a lot better, but at the moment I am feeling bereft.

Re: First Impressioins
 

For goodness sake don't buy a house straight away. If you're feeling like this now after just 24 hours, you're not going to last long.

Re: First Impressioins
 

I would second this, even though I'm in Canada.

Not only because Justcol's suggestion that you might not last, but because it is NOT a good idea to make a decision about buying a house immediately you arrive in a new country.

Find a nice rental so you can get out of the in-laws' house, and then take your time to research the areas to find one where you would really like to live, research houses so you know how different they are from the UK and to determine what you want.

It's still winter there, I well remember arriving in Melbourne at the end of August after spending gloriously warm weeks in the UK and South Africa on our way for a year's sabbatical .......... I was colder than I had ever been growing up in Lancashire near the Pennines.

It does get warmer, your jet lag and the tiredness from rushing around in the weeks before leaving the UK will disappear, and you will begin to feel more positive.

Just do not buy a house this week ................ rent a house ASAP, and take 2 or 3 months (or longer) to find the house you really like.

Re: First Impressioins
 

I suppose it has become a bit parky again in the past week or so judging from the snow on The Ranges where I live.
It will warm up . It is still very early Spring really.

Please do not start searching for houses to buy now. Just please don't.

Living with your in-laws is not an easy choice at all & their ways are certainly not going to be your ways. Better to look for something to rent for a good 6 months at least and find your feet.

Re: First Impressioins
 

There aren't many places in Auckland where there are shops and services all walking distance from your front-door, and those places are all in the central city area.

Living in the suburbs usually requires one car for each adult so I think it will be best to get used to driving everywhere and never speaking to your neighbours. That is the one of the prices that has to be paid for that extra space you can have now.

Re: First Impressioins
 

I also advise not buying straight away. I've lived here before, I love it, know the areas (Chch) and still took a 12 month rental before thinking about buying next year.
I visited three times since the quake and each time it had changed more, and even more so than the last time I was here three years ago. I moved to a city that was a different city to when I lived here pre quake.
I still love it but wanted to make sure.

Michelle 😊

Re: First Impressioins
 

another for DO NOT BUY a house
you have no idea of the area and it may well take years to live in an area and see if you actually like it.
we made the mistake of buying in an area that we had rented in for 6months, worse mistake ever. we sold at a loss 2 years later as we just could not stand the area - turned out to be very parochial , the school for the kids, was a major problem with daughter in the end refusing to go, and I had to get the Education Minister involved.
The new area we moved to isn''t to bad but I think the first 18months really has put a damper on things, so please rent for a couple of years.

Re: First Impressioins
 

Another for the DO NOT BUY A HOUSE yet team. You need at least 1 year, maybe 2 before you'd be absolutely sure of a place to live long term. Buying now comes with a high risk that you'll make a massive mistake. You don't know anything about the country, the culture, the areas where you are, the people and any cultural differences there, the amenities and facilities, the everyday issues or constraints all because you have zero experience of any of it yet.

Re: First Impressioins
 

How's it going now Op?

From experience, it does get better as time goes on

Re: First Impressioins
 

i'll back everyone else who's don't buy a house just yet.....best advice by a long mile

Re: First Impressioins
 

Nigh on a month on and just wondered how the OP is getting on. Hope that you're feeling a little more settled now. It does take a while, at least it's starting to get a bit warmer now.

Re: First Impressioins
 

:)

Actually you do sound entirely negative.

Reminds me of someone facing the prospect of doing a stint in prison........ rather than the excitement at moving to a new country

However, jeg lag and stress can make the best of people feel that way, so lets not focus on that.

If you have children and they like sports of any kind, then you are bound to make new friends really quickly. Most people tend to bond over children, and if you get them involved in all the local clubs (football, netball, cricket, etc...), then you will probably end up with more friends than you know what to do with.

I find New Zealanders very friendly and welcoming, and I made more friends there then I have in any country I have lived in.

In terms of coldness, buy some thermal long johns and top. I wear these undergarments every day in the Sydney winter.

I also have a wonderful possum hair scarf, hat, gloves and socks that leave me snugly warm (possums are killed as pests in NZ)

Here is a tip from someone who has moved over 30 times and lived in several different countries. On NO account keep comparing the UK to NZ. They are two different countries, and constantly thinking about food prices or shops etc... between the two, will only end in annoyance and tears. Simply embrace the new and let go of the old.

I don't mean this in a bad way, but you really need to change your attitude, otherwise you simply won't last the distance and will be miserable the whole time. Instead look on it as an new adventure with wonderful new experiences to be had.

Get yourself involved in the local community as much as possible - even volunteering in your spare time - and you WILL meet people.

And if sometime invites you to a party and tells you to "bring a plate" then make sure you have food on it (early mistake I made that I never lived down!)

If you need to complain, then do it at home behind closed doors - nothing worse than a whingeing pom - it is the quickest way to turn people off you

Personally I would make friends with locals. But if you want a friend from the UK, then join a MeetUp group

Just some ideas to help you settle quicker

Re: First Impressioins
 

Please don't do that. You do not walk in her shoes . What has worked for you may not work for her - or for me. You also do not live here or with her in-laws/.
Hopefully this person has or is settling. Until then , the 'toughen up' and 'get on out there' advice is not really helpful or the ticket.

Listening is.

Re: First Impressioins
 

Wow. Lucky you!

OMG, I am soooooo jealous.

The best Auckland suburb I ever lived in was Parnell

You can pick up a decent property in Parnell for under a million

Lovely houses and a very pretty area.

And a wonderful community feel in the "village".

Fantastic pubs, cafes and eateries. Best pizza, fish pie and coffee I have ever had in my life.

I worked in the city, and walked to and from work every day through the Domain

Also use to walk to the cinema complex in Newmarket a lot

My manager at work use to swim in the local bay too

Really everything in the area you need or nearby within walking distance

I miss those days........

Re: First Impressioins
 

Well obviously........

But surely I can say what I think, since that is my immediate perception of what I read.

Of course my perception could be entirely incorrect, but still I should be able to express it regardless (and that opens up the avenue for discussion and help to be offered further).

However, as I also said, jet lag and stress can do that to the most positive person, and therefore fully understand how she feels.

I remember feeling like that once when I arrived in London, and things ONLY changed for me and I was only able to move forwards, once I changed my mindset

I can only speak from my own past experiences and the errors I made when moving countries.

Maybe my experiences can help someone else, maybe not.

Either way, I always say what I feel and think - sorry if you disagree.

Thanks