favourate quotes of your kids
Jan 23rd 2008, 5:21 pm
#61
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Joined: Jun 2007
Location: Tropical North QLD
Posts: 21,434
Re: favourate quotes of your kids
My mum comes round to visit us and walks into the sun room where my six year old son Josh is playing inside his Spiderman sleeping bag. She tries to talk to him, but can't hear what he's sayings, so she says, "I suggest you take that sleeping bag off your head." From inside the sleeping bag, crystal clear, Josh says, "And *I* suggest, you bite my shiny metal ass." Futurama's got a lot to answer for.
I have 2 daughters, Victoria and Sophie. OH was tickling and carying on with Victoria, throwing her in the air and making her squeal, you know, one of these occassions when you think you have married the perfect man?
I said to her "Who's got the best daddy in the world , then"
To which she replied "Eleanor"
I said to her "Who's got the best daddy in the world , then"
To which she replied "Eleanor"
Poor Dad!My youngest son was going for an op yesterday to fix an undescended testicle. His brother started singin...'remember you're a womble' to him so we have decided to rename him Tobermory, sounds better than one ball!
Jan 24th 2008, 3:22 am
#62
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Location: NZ since 2003.
Posts: 1,433
Re: favourate quotes of your kids
We were all listenig to a very long and complex weather report on the news when our youngest daughter who must have been about 3 at the time suddenly anounced " I thought the weathr was all guess work anyway !!"
Son in a loud voice (aged about 3), in the changing room of C & A', "Mammy your knickers have got a big hole in them"
Friend and I were discussing our lives before we had kids when she said " I remember before I had Emily", when her daughter burst out in tears saying, "But Mammy you have always had me, nobody else has ever had me".
All they seem to say now is "Can I have" and "I need"
Gill
Son in a loud voice (aged about 3), in the changing room of C & A', "Mammy your knickers have got a big hole in them"
Friend and I were discussing our lives before we had kids when she said " I remember before I had Emily", when her daughter burst out in tears saying, "But Mammy you have always had me, nobody else has ever had me".
All they seem to say now is "Can I have" and "I need"
Gill
Jan 24th 2008, 8:33 am
#63
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Joined: Apr 2007
Location: wellington
Posts: 376
Re: favourate quotes of your kids
my lad is 8 and learning the clarinet, we have had loads of fun with the comments he makes about.
1. we was running late for school and i shouted through to him cam hurry up and put the clarinet away to which he replied im just cleaning my bell end( apparantley thats what the end section of the clarinet is called.)me and danny were rolling about laughing in the kitchen.
2. i picked him uo from school and on the way into the house just as we were passing a group of older kids cam announces that his music teacher had learned him to tongue the clarinet
, poor kid didnt have a clue why the teenagers were in hysterics at him.( turns out that tonging the clarinet is a technique used when swithching notes!!!!)
weve also had an occasion in asda when he went upto a rather large lady and her husband whilst they were picking out sanitary towels and shouted to me at the other end of the aisle " mummy this ladys got poorly bum like you" then he said to the lady my mum gets a big fat belly when she has a poorly bum but it dissapears when it goes.
i wanted the ground to swallow me up.
1. we was running late for school and i shouted through to him cam hurry up and put the clarinet away to which he replied im just cleaning my bell end
( apparantley thats what the end section of the clarinet is called.)me and danny were rolling about laughing in the kitchen.2. i picked him uo from school and on the way into the house just as we were passing a group of older kids cam announces that his music teacher had learned him to tongue the clarinet
, poor kid didnt have a clue why the teenagers were in hysterics at him.( turns out that tonging the clarinet is a technique used when swithching notes!!!!)weve also had an occasion in asda when he went upto a rather large lady and her husband whilst they were picking out sanitary towels and shouted to me at the other end of the aisle " mummy this ladys got poorly bum like you" then he said to the lady my mum gets a big fat belly when she has a poorly bum but it dissapears when it goes.
i wanted the ground to swallow me up.
Jan 24th 2008, 8:35 am
#64
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Joined: Aug 2006
Location: Puatahanui, Porirua
Posts: 4,905
Re: favourate quotes of your kids
my lad is 8 and learning the clarinet, we have had loads of fun with the comments he makes about.
1. we was running late for school and i shouted through to him cam hurry up and put the clarinet away to which he replied im just cleaning my bell end( apparantley thats what the end section of the clarinet is called.)me and danny were rolling about laughing in the kitchen.
2. i picked him uo from school and on the way into the house just as we were passing a group of older kids cam announces that his music teacher had learned him to tongue the clarinet, poor kid didnt have a clue why the teenagers were in hysterics at him.( turns out that tonging the clarinet is a technique used when swithching notes!!!!)
weve also had an occasion in asda when he went upto a rather large lady and her husband whilst they were picking out sanitary towels and shouted to me at the other end of the aisle " mummy this ladys got poorly bum like you" then he said to the lady my mum gets a big fat belly when she has a poorly bum but it dissapears when it goes.i wanted the ground to swallow me up.
1. we was running late for school and i shouted through to him cam hurry up and put the clarinet away to which he replied im just cleaning my bell end
( apparantley thats what the end section of the clarinet is called.)me and danny were rolling about laughing in the kitchen.2. i picked him uo from school and on the way into the house just as we were passing a group of older kids cam announces that his music teacher had learned him to tongue the clarinet
, poor kid didnt have a clue why the teenagers were in hysterics at him.( turns out that tonging the clarinet is a technique used when swithching notes!!!!)weve also had an occasion in asda when he went upto a rather large lady and her husband whilst they were picking out sanitary towels and shouted to me at the other end of the aisle " mummy this ladys got poorly bum like you" then he said to the lady my mum gets a big fat belly when she has a poorly bum but it dissapears when it goes.
i wanted the ground to swallow me up.
Jan 24th 2008, 8:43 am
#66
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Jan 24th 2008, 8:57 am
#68
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Location: Whitby, Porirua, Wellington
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Jan 24th 2008, 11:59 am
#69
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Joined: Jan 2007
Location: Glasgow for now - BOP next few months
Posts: 150
Re: favourate quotes of your kids
Son in a loud voice (aged about 3), in the changing room of C & A', "Mammy your knickers have got a big hole in them"
Friend and I were discussing our lives before we had kids when she said " I remember before I had Emily", when her daughter burst out in tears saying, "But Mammy you have always had me, nobody else has ever had me".
Gill
Friend and I were discussing our lives before we had kids when she said " I remember before I had Emily", when her daughter burst out in tears saying, "But Mammy you have always had me, nobody else has ever had me".
Gill
my lad is 8 and learning the clarinet, we have had loads of fun with the comments he makes about.
1. we was running late for school and i shouted through to him cam hurry up and put the clarinet away to which he replied im just cleaning my bell end( apparantley thats what the end section of the clarinet is called.)me and danny were rolling about laughing in the kitchen.
2. i picked him uo from school and on the way into the house just as we were passing a group of older kids cam announces that his music teacher had learned him to tongue the clarinet, poor kid didnt have a clue why the teenagers were in hysterics at him.( turns out that tonging the clarinet is a technique used when swithching notes!!!!)
weve also had an occasion in asda when he went upto a rather large lady and her husband whilst they were picking out sanitary towels and shouted to me at the other end of the aisle " mummy this ladys got poorly bum like you" then he said to the lady my mum gets a big fat belly when she has a poorly bum but it dissapears when it goes.i wanted the ground to swallow me up.
1. we was running late for school and i shouted through to him cam hurry up and put the clarinet away to which he replied im just cleaning my bell end
( apparantley thats what the end section of the clarinet is called.)me and danny were rolling about laughing in the kitchen.2. i picked him uo from school and on the way into the house just as we were passing a group of older kids cam announces that his music teacher had learned him to tongue the clarinet
, poor kid didnt have a clue why the teenagers were in hysterics at him.( turns out that tonging the clarinet is a technique used when swithching notes!!!!)weve also had an occasion in asda when he went upto a rather large lady and her husband whilst they were picking out sanitary towels and shouted to me at the other end of the aisle " mummy this ladys got poorly bum like you" then he said to the lady my mum gets a big fat belly when she has a poorly bum but it dissapears when it goes.
i wanted the ground to swallow me up.
Jan 28th 2008, 4:49 am
#70
L2, GC, Surrey, OH, TX!
Joined: Aug 2007
Location: Surrey to Dallas (via Ohio)!
Posts: 6,363
Re: favourate quotes of your kids
This morning we had both the boys in our room when then woke up. My husband was just unzipping the 1 year old from his grobag so he could run around and in a joking voice said 'im Free I'm Free' as he was so desparate to get out. My older son just piped up 'I'm 4, I'm 4'. We were in stitches!
Feb 3rd 2008, 2:51 am
#71
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Location: always wishing i was somewhere else, getting there and wishing i was somewhere else again.
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Re: favourate quotes of your kids
5 year old came out with "he hurt my feeling" had to choke back the laughter as i was driving. turns out he was playing dead monsters and it was his turn to play dead.
Feb 4th 2008, 11:28 am
#72
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Location: Darvel on West Coast of Scotland
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Re: favourate quotes of your kids
The kid likes to keep a diary, I like to have a wee read at it - we went to an indoor ski place in Glasgow, her diary said "we went to the bar and saw daddy skiing, I had a glass of milk and mummy had a big cock" so I did, but you know what these big cocks are like, they go flat very quickly - at least it was Diet Cock!
Feb 4th 2008, 11:41 am
#73
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Joined: Aug 2006
Location: Puatahanui, Porirua
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Re: favourate quotes of your kids
My middle son was very confused many years ago: he thought that the slider (or whatever it is really called) on a trombone actually went down the musician's throat...took ages to explain that one
Feb 4th 2008, 2:22 pm
#74
The Wicked One
Joined: Jan 2008
Location: Leuchars, Scotland
Posts: 251
Re: favourate quotes of your kids
this one will probably kill the thread but it's had 5 pages now so here goes.
11 year daughter old comes home from school having had a sex ed lesson. 'mummy i don't want children'.
'That's fine dear' i pause ' what about if you get pregnant anyway?'
'Oh, i'll just have an absorbtion!'
Some mother will have em - and i did! Roll on those teenage years!
11 year daughter old comes home from school having had a sex ed lesson. 'mummy i don't want children'.
'That's fine dear' i pause ' what about if you get pregnant anyway?'
'Oh, i'll just have an absorbtion!'
Some mother will have em - and i did! Roll on those teenage years!
May 3rd 2008, 9:21 pm
#75
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Location: Province of Vicenza
Posts: 19,035
Re: favourate quotes of your kids
Cut off at the roundabout by an old fella .... must have sworn under ny breath - must have done it before ....... thought I was being careful.
7 yr old daugter pipes up in perfect English (though she's growing up in Italy) -
"Mummy - what does Prick mean?"
- ' it's a very naughty English word that Mummy just used to describe that silly old man driving in front that nearly made me crash.'
"It's okay Mummy - I was only wondering because you usually say Wanker!"
I think that from now on I have to say "Silly Billy".
7 yr old daugter pipes up in perfect English (though she's growing up in Italy) -
"Mummy - what does Prick mean?"
- ' it's a very naughty English word that Mummy just used to describe that silly old man driving in front that nearly made me crash.'
"It's okay Mummy - I was only wondering because you usually say Wanker!"
I think that from now on I have to say "Silly Billy".