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-   -   Emotional challenges ! (https://britishexpats.com/forum/new-zealand-83/emotional-challenges-729820/)

annabel1 Aug 24th 2011 7:55 am

Emotional challenges !
 
Hi guys,

I know this one has been done on may occasions but just felt I needed to share the current challenges I have on the emotional front !
We fly out to NZ on Tuesday so only have a few days left in the UK and I am feeling the emotional pulls now more than ever ! We have planned for so long to get out to NZ and things have changed so much along the way it's incredible. I have managed to stay really on top of my emotions for so long and have surprised myself with how well I have done to not get stressed or be a teary wreck, but now with only a few days to go I am in constant need of tissues !
At the start with our plans (5 years ago) both of our kids were coming out with us but as they have got older things have changed. Our son who is now 18 is coming with us but our daughter who is now 20 is staying in the UK :/ Just over 2 years ago she had a beautiful daughter and made us proud grandparents, so was no longer eligible to be included on our visa. Throughout our plans she had always been completely undecided about the move and we always knew she had to make her own decisions and life choices but now it has come so close to our leaving day it really is so difficult for me. She is just such a star and is so supportive about what we are doing it's incredible as I know she is hiding so much but does not want to upset us. I keep thinking I should be the one to show a bit more strength but I am finding it just so difficult.
I am sure that once we have moved and have got back into a house of our own it should get easier. I am looking forward to the move but also feel completely split in two with that awful stomach turning wrench of leaving them behind but also the excitement of a new life. We do have a flight tentatively arranged for them both to visit next Easter which will be wonderful and also have Skype all sorted too so will be making the most of the video calls. Although our granddaughter is only just 2 she has managed on several occasions to call me independently on a Skype home phone, so it will be interesting to see how many calls we get in the early hours of the morning over the next couple of years !!!
I know I am far from the first person to be leaving children and grandchildren (not to mention the rest of the family) in the UK to follow my own dreams but never the less it is still challenging and so impossible to predict how it will be when it comes to the crunch ! I am hoping this will be a form of therapy to reduce the tissue usage ................ I will let you know how I get on :)

charlcote Aug 24th 2011 9:08 am

Re: Emotional challenges !
 

Originally Posted by annabel1 (Post 9578696)
Hi guys,

I know this one has been done on may occasions but just felt I needed to share the current challenges I have on the emotional front !
We fly out to NZ on Tuesday so only have a few days left in the UK and I am feeling the emotional pulls now more than ever ! We have planned for so long to get out to NZ and things have changed so much along the way it's incredible. I have managed to stay really on top of my emotions for so long and have surprised myself with how well I have done to not get stressed or be a teary wreck, but now with only a few days to go I am in constant need of tissues !
At the start with our plans (5 years ago) both of our kids were coming out with us but as they have got older things have changed. Our son who is now 18 is coming with us but our daughter who is now 20 is staying in the UK :/ Just over 2 years ago she had a beautiful daughter and made us proud grandparents, so was no longer eligible to be included on our visa. Throughout our plans she had always been completely undecided about the move and we always knew she had to make her own decisions and life choices but now it has come so close to our leaving day it really is so difficult for me. She is just such a star and is so supportive about what we are doing it's incredible as I know she is hiding so much but does not want to upset us. I keep thinking I should be the one to show a bit more strength but I am finding it just so difficult.
I am sure that once we have moved and have got back into a house of our own it should get easier. I am looking forward to the move but also feel completely split in two with that awful stomach turning wrench of leaving them behind but also the excitement of a new life. We do have a flight tentatively arranged for them both to visit next Easter which will be wonderful and also have Skype all sorted too so will be making the most of the video calls. Although our granddaughter is only just 2 she has managed on several occasions to call me independently on a Skype home phone, so it will be interesting to see how many calls we get in the early hours of the morning over the next couple of years !!!
I know I am far from the first person to be leaving children and grandchildren (not to mention the rest of the family) in the UK to follow my own dreams but never the less it is still challenging and so impossible to predict how it will be when it comes to the crunch ! I am hoping this will be a form of therapy to reduce the tissue usage ................ I will let you know how I get on :)

All the best for your big adventure. These are such familiar feelings you describe - holding pain and sorrow in one hand, and excitement and hope in the other. Go well.

rick78 Aug 24th 2011 10:50 am

Re: Emotional challenges !
 
best of luck - youll be fine, my emotions were well hidden but when i said goodbye to my mum it was really hard... i've only ever cried four times... my marriage, my daughters birth, my great uncles death and when i said "see you later" to my mum

so far its bloody worth it though, loving NZ so far

Expat Kiwi Aug 24th 2011 10:54 am

Re: Emotional challenges !
 

Originally Posted by annabel1 (Post 9578696)
Hi guys,

I know this one has been done on may occasions but just felt I needed to share the current challenges I have on the emotional front !
We fly out to NZ on Tuesday so only have a few days left in the UK and I am feeling the emotional pulls now more than ever ! We have planned for so long to get out to NZ and things have changed so much along the way it's incredible. I have managed to stay really on top of my emotions for so long and have surprised myself with how well I have done to not get stressed or be a teary wreck, but now with only a few days to go I am in constant need of tissues !
At the start with our plans (5 years ago) both of our kids were coming out with us but as they have got older things have changed. Our son who is now 18 is coming with us but our daughter who is now 20 is staying in the UK :/ Just over 2 years ago she had a beautiful daughter and made us proud grandparents, so was no longer eligible to be included on our visa. Throughout our plans she had always been completely undecided about the move and we always knew she had to make her own decisions and life choices but now it has come so close to our leaving day it really is so difficult for me. She is just such a star and is so supportive about what we are doing it's incredible as I know she is hiding so much but does not want to upset us. I keep thinking I should be the one to show a bit more strength but I am finding it just so difficult.
I am sure that once we have moved and have got back into a house of our own it should get easier. I am looking forward to the move but also feel completely split in two with that awful stomach turning wrench of leaving them behind but also the excitement of a new life. We do have a flight tentatively arranged for them both to visit next Easter which will be wonderful and also have Skype all sorted too so will be making the most of the video calls. Although our granddaughter is only just 2 she has managed on several occasions to call me independently on a Skype home phone, so it will be interesting to see how many calls we get in the early hours of the morning over the next couple of years !!!
I know I am far from the first person to be leaving children and grandchildren (not to mention the rest of the family) in the UK to follow my own dreams but never the less it is still challenging and so impossible to predict how it will be when it comes to the crunch ! I am hoping this will be a form of therapy to reduce the tissue usage ................ I will let you know how I get on :)

You've got to try it, otherwise you'll be forever wondering "what if"

What's the worst that could happen - you could have to go home again? Be sure to put a bit of money aside so you can if want to.

Who knows, in future years most of your family could follow you out there on their own accord.


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