Persephone

Hi, glad to see you're starting to get over the bout of the "wobbles". It's normal to have second thoughts whenever you make any major lifechanging decision, if you didn't then you haven't really thought about it enough And moving to the other side of the world can be counted as reasonably major
You just have to be able to differentiate between a wobble and serious concerns.
It is funny how you can have everything sorted in your head, you've gone thorugh all the pros and cons and you know it's the right decision and then suddenly it hits you. You wonder why you're doing it, that it will be the worst mistake of your life, what on earth made you think you wanted to move to NZ in the first place and so on and so on. It happened to me, totally unexpectedly and I was over here on a visit prior to the big move. I booked the all important one way flight and suddenly realised I wasn't sure I wanted to emigrate at all. Scared the hell out of the other half since he is a kiwi and wasn't moving to the UK!!
Anyway it passed in a couple of days and all was right with the world again [and still is now I'm here for good] Though must admit the closer it came to moving out the more I seemed to concentrate on the negatives such as leaving family and friends. It becomes more real the closer you get to the move. You just have to put them into perspective-would you really have got this far down the line without having given serious thought about what you're doing- probably not!
Just trying to say that when it happens you need to look back to all the reasons why you want to come over here and take a step back, reconsider all the downsides again and look forwards.
Good luck and all the best
Sue

wilki

my advise would be keep as much money as you can, rent dont buy. I know is money down the drain, but dont get drawn into the falling in love with the place and buying. and dont spend your hard earned money, be very carefull.
that way if you want to return to the Uk later. and buy again you will be able too.

vicejw

Think for the moment I'm over the worst - haha for the moment - until next week.
My folks have announced they'll come out every winter (here) / Summer (in NZ) for a good few months. And following a WW3 style family bust up today between me and my sister over how we spend our last weekend here. She doesn't understand it's not up to her but up to us what we do and def. doesn't appreciate I have to think of OH and his family. Geez think I'll be glad to escape some family politic stuff, people will surely be nice to us when we're so far away!!! Here's hoping.
Anyway all your pearls of wisdom have helped and it has made me feel infinitely better that no one has said no don't do it..... I know it's best for us.
My 4 year old has just started full time school and on her first day a little boy spat at her! Nice ay, she is supposedly in a great school and we live in a rather expensive area (not that we can really afford it but it seemed the best idea at the time for her school wise), the kids here have way too much and there is too much emphasis on material possessions. Sure NZ won't be perfect but from what we've heard and what we saw when we visited last year kids can be kids for longer - as long as I don't have to see Hannah Montana or High School Musical everywhere I'll be happy - sorry to any fans!!!!!!

Anyway bit off topic but there we go, so thanks to all the above and some happy vibes my feet are a bit warmer for now so until the next time, ta for all the helpful comments.

TeamEmbo

I see what you're saying, but isn't that the idea? To fall in love with the place and make a go of it?

We looked at it the opposite way round. If this was to be our new 'home' then we needed to be settled as quickly as possible and put down roots so to speak and view it as home. We were well aware at that time that everyone was telling us it can take at least 2 years to feel settled so at least with buying a house it was an anchor to stop us making any rash decisions at the first hint of homesickness and upping sticks and moving back which we might have regretted later (like so many other ping pong poms).

I know everyone is different. Our personal circumstances were that we didn't have a lot of money. We didn't want to waste it renting. We wanted a home of our own that we could put our stamp on and get a foot on the property ladder here as a long-term investment and view this as home from the outset not a temporary toe dip. We have 2 children and also felt for them that things should be as settled as possible and that they felt there was a future ahead of them here so that they could settle asap without it feeling temporary.

wilki

You have to ask yourself why are so many kiwis leaving NZ, to earn a better wage, in Australia or in the UK. it will take you one to two years to know how you feel, maybe. just because you will own a home there, will make no difference to feelings, if anything it will make you feel trapped.
What happens if you buy and a job is lost, or you feel unhappy in the town you have chosen, saying you need to feel settled as quickly as possible for the children, is just putting pressure on you.
Buy the sound of it, you dont have alot of money, and NZ is not a cheap place to live, you want to live the dream, but for many people who move there, that dream turns into a nightmare.
I wish you all the best and really really hope it works out for you.

Persephone

Personally I agree with Teamembo, if you decide to move somewhere then you should try to settle in as soon as possible, making new friends, putting down roots and generally treating it as permanent [assuming it is meant to be permanent of course]. You should always bear in mind that it may turn out not to be the right decision and have contingency plans just in case. As far as losing a job or not liking the town is concerned, well that could apply to any place you move to. The same would apply if you moved within the UK so it makes sense to try and feel at home as fast as possible. A house can always be sold. Treating the move as temporary and not making the effort to settle down just in case things change means you're never going to make a proper go of it.
Yes NZ isn't cheap when you look at the level of wages compared to the cost of living but anyone moving here should have considered this and assessed their likely income against their outgoings. The unexpected can always happen but it all comes down to doing plenty of research before you arrive as to whether you can afford NZ.

Bellasmum

I was one of those Kiwi's (twice) who left home to live in Aus and the UK wilki, but I like many others I came home.

Yes you can earn more money on your OE but that is not the only reason Kiwi's go abroad. The biggest reason young Kiwi's do is to see the world.

When you live this far down under most of us like to go and see the world.
We don't exactly have Europe on our back door step.

I am wondering if you are someone who found NZ not to your liking.

Not everybody will, especially if money and possessions are top of your list of what makes for a good lifestyle.