Snowymissy

Hi everyone
Ive been living in Chch NZ for over 10 years now. I originally moved out from Cornwall UK. I love it here though sometimes feel a bit isolated, which is why I'm posting on this forum. When i first moved here I came with my ex husband and 3 boys, since then i have split with my husband and now live with a new partner and we have a big blended family of 6 kids.
I originally settled really well, made some great friends and had no regrets at all. However in the last couple of years, ( largely thanks to EQ's) my 2 best friends have left, one to the UK and another to Perth. Since then I have struggled making new friends. My kids are all older now, and it doesn't seem as easy as it did when I was younger, plus I work by myself too so I don't meet people that way. I am ok, i have a great family and have been welcomed into a wider family too, it is just sometimes I wish I had a better network.
Also recently i have missed the Uk more, ( I think when left I had rose tinted glasses on for NZ and just thought UK was grey and depressing - but now I appreciate it's beauty too) my father died last year and it was really really hard being so far away. I have become quite distanced from my family in UK now except my mum whom I Skype weekly.
I think it is an amazing country here to live, I love the landscape, I spend much more time outdoors than I ever did in Uk, i am healthier and my kids are thriving . I can not see my self ever leaving this country, though it is funny how sometimes waves of homesickness, or lack of roots comes, and then for months you are fine again.
hope this isn't too long winded - just here I am

bakedbean

Hello and welcome to the forum

Wow, reading your post, you have gone through a lot of "losses" in a relatively short space of time, so it's no wonder that you are feeling isolated. Anybody would.

I've shifted your post over to the Kiwi section and I am sure that the regulars will have a good chat with you.

Snowycat

Thanks Baked Bean
Rereading my thread this morning I am shocked at how depressed I sounded, on another day I would have written it differently. The majority of the time I am actually very upbeat - just sometimes these strange homesick waves occur. And I do talk to my family in UK , but sometimes hard to stay super close when far away I have found. In fact yesterday's nostalgic-ness I think was set off was a photo my sister sent of her and my mum on a walk in the countryside , it looked so pretty and green, and just tugged at my inside somehow, there is a certain woodland greenness that I realise we don't get here. Not better than here, we have the best majestic views here ever, just different. Plus you realise what you have left behind, (even though I would make the same decision in a heartbeat every time). And I think yesterday was quite cold here in Chch and ....winter is coming kinda feelings too. Anyways I guess sometimes would be really nice to connect with others who know what it feels like to be a long way away from family and know what these unsettled feelings can be like.

Justcol

I felt exactly the same way when my mum passed away a couple of years ago.
It passes, or at least it did for me

bourbon-biscuit

Hello, welcome to BE

I think lots of us will understand what you're experiencing! The woodland greenness of Britain-as-I-know-it gets me every time. I'm living in Australia right now and the bush here is wonderful but will probably never stir my spirit like a spring walk in bluebell woods.

Hope you enjoy BE!

Mark Smith

My wife belongs to a group of Christchurch ladies who meet socially once a twice a month, there seems to be a good mix of immigrants and locals. I'm sure they'd welcome a guest. https://www.facebook.com/ladiescirclechch/ Admin please feel free to delete if this breaks the rules.

LauraNotts

Welcome to the forum. I'm based in Christchurch and always up for a coffee

31 year old Nurse no kids if you needed some demographic info on me I've been here coming up 3 years.

Snowycat

Yay thanks for all the replies. Really glad I took the plunge and posted . It does help to know there are others who know, understand and experience these things too, and that I am not alone in feeling this way. Now I found this forum I may even be able to wean myself off from my addiction of watching "Wanted down under " series Would love a coffee Laura thank you! and will check out that FB page too Mark .

sarahw

Hi - I know exactly what you mean. We've been here just over 10 years too and whilst I'm glad we moved I do still feel somewhat isolated.

I've certainly found it hard to make good friends although I have loads of acquaintances but that's not the same as a few really close friends or family. It probably doesn't help that we have no children or extended family in NZ either.

We've recently been wondering if Auckland (why do I always type it as Suckland ) is really the place for us and are considering a move to Christchurch in a year or so. I'm hoping a smaller city might be more friendly.

Anyway keep positive and we're always here for a chat!

Clairej

I'm understanding your post totally! I've been here 2 years now with my family, kids are 12 & 8. We love this country as we are dairy farmers and compared to the UK the opportunities are amazing! In a way just wished we had done the move earlier when the kids were younger, or before them! Everyone is so nice and friendly but there's just something I seem to be missing...that close connection of friends that I had when the kids were young and all grew up together, I left that behind and at the age of the kids won't get it again I'm sure.
I feel myself pining for England some days although most I'm happy to have had the opportunity to move here and live the life we are. The kids are happy, took my daughter a while! But they are very settled now, with lots of friends, that I can be thankful for. Just miss my mates who I can call round to at anytime for a coffee and chat. The farm keeps me busy though and plans for the future 😃

Justcol

I would definitely say get out of suckland but Chch
doesn't strike me as a particularly friendly place.
Of course I'm probably wrong but it looks like a
broken sprawling mishmash that's lost its way

j19fmm

Which area are you in Claire? Might be others out there who feel the same that you could meet up with!

BEVS

Aw. It's perfectly normal and OK to feel that and to say it too.

I've been here 12 years and still have this. I miss my long time great friends too. It is all a part of being a very brave migrant & it is not as if any one of us can just hop back is it.

So. Yes. Where are you . What's your name and where do you come from?

Recognise the show.

Seriously. We're here. It's a whole part of BE as Fi knows.

Come on.

Clairej

I'm in Matamata, well just outside on a farm. Would be great to meet others in a similar situation. I've met lots of lovely people but all are either locals or have been here for 15 years or so with their kids growing up here...it's not quite the same, do you know what I mean?

j19fmm

[QUOTE=BEVS;11952399 It's a whole part of BE as Fi knows.

Come on.[/QUOTE]

And BEVs is one of the bestest xx