After 5 years in NZ
Mar 6th 2008, 8:27 pm
#91
Forum Regular
Joined: Jan 2008
Location: Swindon
Posts: 54
Re: After 5 years in NZ
Thank you NZGrl for the post it does give us a different and balanced view
I know emigrating is hard as apart from missing friends, relatives and the simplest things such as food
you find your self at the same time trying to fit in (know the culture) and get used to the new place... if you add the money constraitns to the last 2 it even becomes harder..... I have been in England for over 6 years and I am still treated as a foreigner, even though my English is quite good I do have an accent and as soon as I speak people changes their views or patronize me..... after a few years I manage to ignore this fact and I have manage to make some freinds but it will never be like back at home and I know that (probably down to cultural differences)..... I am hoping that my experience in the UK will help me adapting to our life in NZ as it will be sending me back to the first day I came over here.... being alone (well with my OH and son) in a complete different place I keep telling my hubby that "if I've managed to make friends here I am confident I will make friends anywhere in the world" I don't mean this in a bad way, is just that is my personality (latin blood I guess) 
Anyway this post is not about me, just wanted to say good luck in your new adventure, and let this experience (yours of course), as bitter as it has been, help you adapt to your new dream when the time comes
All the best
I know emigrating is hard as apart from missing friends, relatives and the simplest things such as food
you find your self at the same time trying to fit in (know the culture) and get used to the new place... if you add the money constraitns to the last 2 it even becomes harder..... I have been in England for over 6 years and I am still treated as a foreigner, even though my English is quite good I do have an accent and as soon as I speak people changes their views or patronize me..... after a few years I manage to ignore this fact and I have manage to make some freinds but it will never be like back at home and I know that (probably down to cultural differences)..... I am hoping that my experience in the UK will help me adapting to our life in NZ as it will be sending me back to the first day I came over here.... being alone (well with my OH and son) in a complete different place I keep telling my hubby that "if I've managed to make friends here I am confident I will make friends anywhere in the world" I don't mean this in a bad way, is just that is my personality (latin blood I guess) Anyway this post is not about me, just wanted to say good luck in your new adventure, and let this experience (yours of course), as bitter as it has been, help you adapt to your new dream when the time comes
All the best
Mar 6th 2008, 8:42 pm
#92
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 2,813
Re: After 5 years in NZ
nena11,
Do you have any relatives that may be interested in immigrating to New Zealand? This country could use more of a Latin flavour.
Do you have any relatives that may be interested in immigrating to New Zealand? This country could use more of a Latin flavour.
Mar 6th 2008, 8:57 pm
#93
Forum Regular
Thread Starter
Joined: Mar 2007
Location: Orewa
Posts: 237
Re: After 5 years in NZ
I agree Happynz...This country needs more latin flavour...A bit like the vibrance of Melbourne with the Italian influence
Mar 6th 2008, 9:16 pm
#94
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 4,298
Re: After 5 years in NZ
[QUOTE=Poppy2;6025300]Hey, we never said dont come, did we?
NZ girl said exactly that, with a BIG NO...see 1st post. I think that did not need to be said.
The UK stopped 'working' for me, but I would never advise anyone not to live in the UK..or anywhere for that matter. A place is what you make of it, good and bad all thrown in together.
Just because NZ did not/has not been a complete success for her does not mean that others will not find their place. We did and we love life in NZ warts and all, its far from perfect, just better than we left behind.
NZ girl said exactly that, with a BIG NO...see 1st post. I think that did not need to be said.
The UK stopped 'working' for me, but I would never advise anyone not to live in the UK..or anywhere for that matter. A place is what you make of it, good and bad all thrown in together.
Just because NZ did not/has not been a complete success for her does not mean that others will not find their place. We did and we love life in NZ warts and all, its far from perfect, just better than we left behind.
Mar 6th 2008, 9:22 pm
#95
Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 1,454
Re: After 5 years in NZ
If this forum was limited to factual information with the occasional 'testimonial' about how great New Zealand is I'd guess it would dry up and die within a few months.
There's been some strange posts on this thread...people having cold feet about emigrating because they've read something 'negative', the 'happy-clappers' thinking that by pretending everything is great it somehow does justice to this country.
The reality is much more boring, isn't it? New Zealand is just another country and everybodys personal experiences of it will be unique ones, heavily dependent on their attitudes and circumstances.
Right, that's me covered.
Personally speaking I've found most of the Kiwis that I have met to be superficially friendly but under the surface rather petty and shallow (mean-spirited, even). Luckily for me, I'm only looking for superficial friendliness in my life but I can well understand how some people may end up feeling 'friendless' after years of living here. Ex-pat friends don't count, by the way. That's just living in a ghetto (wonderful as the ghetto may be). But the first wave of immigrants in any country tend to stick together, they often don't have much choice, so it's nothing to be ashamed of.
Perhaps it is the grinding poverty or the harshness of the elements that makes the natives the way they are...or perhaps all the nice ones have buggered off overseas. Who knows? Or cares.
What useful generalisations can we all agree on about emigrating here? That it is VERY far away. That you should love the great outdoors before coming here (because the indoors isn't all that great) and that you REALLY shouldn't be a materialistic person as nobody comes here to get rich. Or stay rich...
Apart from that, everything else is subjective. There are actually posters on this forum who are saying that Palmerston North is a nice place to live!! How subjective is that??!! Personally, I've been to Holocaust Memorials that were more upbeat than Palmy North's main square, but each to their own.
By the way, if you are one of those types who are only coming here for the sake of the children you might want to have a good hard think about what moving your children to the other side of the planet will do to them in the long-term. They will get to play outdoors in the dying Summer sunlight like we all did when we were kids but what will the long term cultural effects be? Probably quite good, now I think about it.
These are always good questions to ask: What do you think New Zealand can give you that you can't get in the UK? Is there no way you couldn't improve your life without having to travel to the other side of the planet? Are you 100% sure you couldn't just move to Scotland? It's almost the same as New Zealand but with slightly better television.
There will be a test later.
There's been some strange posts on this thread...people having cold feet about emigrating because they've read something 'negative', the 'happy-clappers' thinking that by pretending everything is great it somehow does justice to this country.
The reality is much more boring, isn't it? New Zealand is just another country and everybodys personal experiences of it will be unique ones, heavily dependent on their attitudes and circumstances.
Right, that's me covered.
Personally speaking I've found most of the Kiwis that I have met to be superficially friendly but under the surface rather petty and shallow (mean-spirited, even). Luckily for me, I'm only looking for superficial friendliness in my life but I can well understand how some people may end up feeling 'friendless' after years of living here. Ex-pat friends don't count, by the way. That's just living in a ghetto (wonderful as the ghetto may be). But the first wave of immigrants in any country tend to stick together, they often don't have much choice, so it's nothing to be ashamed of.
Perhaps it is the grinding poverty or the harshness of the elements that makes the natives the way they are...or perhaps all the nice ones have buggered off overseas. Who knows? Or cares.
What useful generalisations can we all agree on about emigrating here? That it is VERY far away. That you should love the great outdoors before coming here (because the indoors isn't all that great) and that you REALLY shouldn't be a materialistic person as nobody comes here to get rich. Or stay rich...
Apart from that, everything else is subjective. There are actually posters on this forum who are saying that Palmerston North is a nice place to live!! How subjective is that??!! Personally, I've been to Holocaust Memorials that were more upbeat than Palmy North's main square, but each to their own.
By the way, if you are one of those types who are only coming here for the sake of the children you might want to have a good hard think about what moving your children to the other side of the planet will do to them in the long-term. They will get to play outdoors in the dying Summer sunlight like we all did when we were kids but what will the long term cultural effects be? Probably quite good, now I think about it.
These are always good questions to ask: What do you think New Zealand can give you that you can't get in the UK? Is there no way you couldn't improve your life without having to travel to the other side of the planet? Are you 100% sure you couldn't just move to Scotland? It's almost the same as New Zealand but with slightly better television.
There will be a test later.
Last edited by Avid; Mar 6th 2008 at 9:26 pm.
Mar 6th 2008, 9:45 pm
#96
Banned
Joined: Jan 2008
Location: No more bloody flies.
Posts: 1,084
Re: After 5 years in NZ
If this forum was limited to factual information with the occasional 'testimonial' about how great New Zealand is I'd guess it would dry up and die within a few months.
There's been some strange posts on this thread...people having cold feet about emigrating because they've read something 'negative', the 'happy-clappers' thinking that by pretending everything is great it somehow does justice to this country.
The reality is much more boring, isn't it? New Zealand is just another country and everybodys personal experiences of it will be unique ones, heavily dependent on their attitudes and circumstances.
Right, that's me covered.
Personally speaking I've found most of the Kiwis that I have met to be superficially friendly but under the surface rather petty and shallow (mean-spirited, even). Luckily for me, I'm only looking for superficial friendliness in my life but I can well understand how some people may end up feeling 'friendless' after years of living here. Ex-pat friends don't count, by the way. That's just living in a ghetto (wonderful as the ghetto may be). But the first wave of immigrants in any country tend to stick together, they often don't have much choice, so it's nothing to be ashamed of.
Perhaps it is the grinding poverty or the harshness of the elements that makes the natives the way they are...or perhaps all the nice ones have buggered off overseas. Who knows? Or cares.
What useful generalisations can we all agree on about emigrating here? That it is VERY far away. That you should love the great outdoors before coming here (because the indoors isn't all that great) and that you REALLY shouldn't be a materialistic person as nobody comes here to get rich. Or stay rich...
Apart from that, everything else is subjective. There are actually posters on this forum who are saying that Palmerston North is a nice place to live!! How subjective is that??!! Personally, I've been to Holocaust Memorials that were more upbeat than Palmy North's main square, but each to their own.
By the way, if you are one of those types who are only coming here for the sake of the children you might want to have a good hard think about what moving your children to the other side of the planet will do to them in the long-term. They will get to play outdoors in the dying Summer sunlight like we all did when we were kids but what will the long term cultural effects be? Probably quite good, now I think about it.
These are always good questions to ask: What do you think New Zealand can give you that you can't get in the UK? Is there no way you couldn't improve your life without having to travel to the other side of the planet? Are you 100% sure you couldn't just move to Scotland? It's almost the same as New Zealand but with slightly better television.
There will be a test later.
There's been some strange posts on this thread...people having cold feet about emigrating because they've read something 'negative', the 'happy-clappers' thinking that by pretending everything is great it somehow does justice to this country.
The reality is much more boring, isn't it? New Zealand is just another country and everybodys personal experiences of it will be unique ones, heavily dependent on their attitudes and circumstances.
Right, that's me covered.
Personally speaking I've found most of the Kiwis that I have met to be superficially friendly but under the surface rather petty and shallow (mean-spirited, even). Luckily for me, I'm only looking for superficial friendliness in my life but I can well understand how some people may end up feeling 'friendless' after years of living here. Ex-pat friends don't count, by the way. That's just living in a ghetto (wonderful as the ghetto may be). But the first wave of immigrants in any country tend to stick together, they often don't have much choice, so it's nothing to be ashamed of.
Perhaps it is the grinding poverty or the harshness of the elements that makes the natives the way they are...or perhaps all the nice ones have buggered off overseas. Who knows? Or cares.
What useful generalisations can we all agree on about emigrating here? That it is VERY far away. That you should love the great outdoors before coming here (because the indoors isn't all that great) and that you REALLY shouldn't be a materialistic person as nobody comes here to get rich. Or stay rich...
Apart from that, everything else is subjective. There are actually posters on this forum who are saying that Palmerston North is a nice place to live!! How subjective is that??!! Personally, I've been to Holocaust Memorials that were more upbeat than Palmy North's main square, but each to their own.
By the way, if you are one of those types who are only coming here for the sake of the children you might want to have a good hard think about what moving your children to the other side of the planet will do to them in the long-term. They will get to play outdoors in the dying Summer sunlight like we all did when we were kids but what will the long term cultural effects be? Probably quite good, now I think about it.
These are always good questions to ask: What do you think New Zealand can give you that you can't get in the UK? Is there no way you couldn't improve your life without having to travel to the other side of the planet? Are you 100% sure you couldn't just move to Scotland? It's almost the same as New Zealand but with slightly better television.
There will be a test later.
I like this guy
Mar 6th 2008, 9:47 pm
#97
Forum Regular
Thread Starter
Joined: Mar 2007
Location: Orewa
Posts: 237
Re: After 5 years in NZ
Avid...You always made me laugh with your very.....erm.....unique postings...Cheers!
Mar 6th 2008, 10:42 pm
#101
NS covern member #1
Joined: May 2007
Location: Halifax, Nova Scotia
Posts: 968
Re: After 5 years in NZ
Avid - I have missed reading your replies, having flown the coup to the Canada board. I am not sure how you get away with saying what you do, when we mere mortals attempt the same and get bashed by the happy clappers you refer to. I suspect my wit is not as refined as yours. Why didnt you live next door to us when we lived there? The Sestos - please go to the Canada forum and read the info on Wiki regarding Newcomers and all that pertains to getting employment in Canada. Sadly, you have struck upon the phenomenon that each and everyone of us have - sending out CV's opens no doors in Canada. You need a Canadian style Resume rather than a CV and you need to follow up every contact with phone calls. They are a shy bunch and like to meet you face to face. You would find work I am sure of that, but you need to understand the mentality and not take it personally. No employer in vast old Canada is sitting about just waiting for a UK potential employee to send them a CV that reads very poorly by comparison to a Resume. You want in, you have to put some serious hard work in to make it happen. Reccie visits, meeting people in the companies that you want to work for. Research, research, research. Making contacts and getting known. Its as easy as get a job and get out there, the issue is just understanding the psyche. Get the map out, have an idea of where to go, get some cheap return flights over the summer and meet some employers. You can get that job and have a Work Permit in 4-6 weeks. Just getting through that initial barrier. Go read all you can. Canada is not as easy as NZ to get into, but you need to commit to the process and go for it.
Mar 6th 2008, 10:59 pm
#102
Forum Regular
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 129
Re: After 5 years in NZ
......and to Dave and LIsa...Yes my life has changed since adopting the kids...but for gods sake we did not do anything BEFORE the kids anyway in NZ...The stuff we always did we could have included the kids in anyway like fishing and BBQ'ing. We've only had the kids for 1 year and I sure as hell felt this way about NZ before they came along.
......Oh go on then Shoot me down AGAIN![/QUOTE]
Absolutely no intention of shooting you down NZGRL and sorry if it appears so. Typing is like texting with no tone in voice or facial expression and its hard to see how you come across, so I did not score high there
. We are in the do we don't we stage again!!! as many find themselves a hundred times I am sure. As I dont know you, how long you had the kids, etc I was wondering if these could be attributing factors, as I said we have found things hard. So I was wondering how much harder would we find it. I am no way a material person but don't want to be flat flat broke..I am trying to do as much research as possible to prepare me and my family for leaving all we love and hate behind. This was my question if its the country or possibly the massive changes you have been through. I have enjoyed and like I said been slightly scared reading this thread as there has been some honesty about the place, what we need! When my OH went on his recce he found it difficult to scratch the surface in the 8 days he was there. So we use this site as our baseline guide building on what he saw. I have noticed people who are negative about NZ are some times shot down for this, honest open opinion is what were after so again thanks for it!!!!
......Oh go on then Shoot me down AGAIN![/QUOTE]
Absolutely no intention of shooting you down NZGRL and sorry if it appears so. Typing is like texting with no tone in voice or facial expression and its hard to see how you come across, so I did not score high there
. We are in the do we don't we stage again!!! as many find themselves a hundred times I am sure. As I dont know you, how long you had the kids, etc I was wondering if these could be attributing factors, as I said we have found things hard. So I was wondering how much harder would we find it. I am no way a material person but don't want to be flat flat broke..I am trying to do as much research as possible to prepare me and my family for leaving all we love and hate behind. This was my question if its the country or possibly the massive changes you have been through. I have enjoyed and like I said been slightly scared reading this thread as there has been some honesty about the place, what we need! When my OH went on his recce he found it difficult to scratch the surface in the 8 days he was there. So we use this site as our baseline guide building on what he saw. I have noticed people who are negative about NZ are some times shot down for this, honest open opinion is what were after so again thanks for it!!!!
Mar 6th 2008, 11:08 pm
#103
NS covern member #1
Joined: May 2007
Location: Halifax, Nova Scotia
Posts: 968
Re: After 5 years in NZ
......and to Dave and LIsa...Yes my life has changed since adopting the kids...but for gods sake we did not do anything BEFORE the kids anyway in NZ...The stuff we always did we could have included the kids in anyway like fishing and BBQ'ing. We've only had the kids for 1 year and I sure as hell felt this way about NZ before they came along.
......Oh go on then Shoot me down AGAIN!
......Oh go on then Shoot me down AGAIN!
. We are in the do we don't we stage again!!! as many find themselves a hundred times I am sure. As I dont know you, how long you had the kids, etc I was wondering if these could be attributing factors, as I said we have found things hard. So I was wondering how much harder would we find it. I am no way a material person but don't want to be flat flat broke..I am trying to do as much research as possible to prepare me and my family for leaving all we love and hate behind. This was my question if its the country or possibly the massive changes you have been through. I have enjoyed and like I said been slightly scared reading this thread as there has been some honesty about the place, what we need! When my OH went on his recce he found it difficult to scratch the surface in the 8 days he was there. So we use this site as our baseline guide building on what he saw. I have noticed people who are negative about NZ are some times shot down for this, honest open opinion is what were after so again thanks for it!!!![/QUOTE]I think that many people could be happy in NZ, and many that leave could have found more happiness there. But I think you need to have such a level of knowledge to pick the right town, the right job, the right house, the right school and be lucky enough to meet the right people. I think that many of us are so glad to have a job offer, we plunge on over to NZ, buy a house and from there it all falls apart.
Find the right place and buy wisely. Or rent. Flexibility is key, because in the more quiet areas (so anywhere that isnt Auckland, Wellington, Christchurch) the housing markets are slow and you are not certain to get your money back upon selling, so choose property that you love and can live well and cheaply in, because it will be an albatros if not.
Its always worth a try, and I am very proud to say we have had an NZ adventure, because as a family we did have an adventure.
Mar 7th 2008, 12:00 am
#104
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 3,038
To be or not to be..........
There is no denying that in the past there have been several occasions when forum users have had their opinion challenged in a most assertive manner by others.
What is needed and provided is a mixed bag of opinions to allow other users to make (or at the very least - help make) an informed and valued judgment.
Then it is to the individual to determine their next course of action, if any, based upon anecdotal evidence or informed sources.
Makes this shallow web site what it is............
NG
What is needed and provided is a mixed bag of opinions to allow other users to make (or at the very least - help make) an informed and valued judgment.
Then it is to the individual to determine their next course of action, if any, based upon anecdotal evidence or informed sources.
Makes this shallow web site what it is............
NG
Last edited by Nice Guy; Mar 7th 2008 at 12:00 am. Reason: Another spilling mistake
Mar 7th 2008, 5:02 am
#105
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 1,008
Re: After 5 years in NZ
Well its coming up to my 5 year anniversary and I thought that I would post some highs and lows.
Hubbie and I arrived in NZ with$15000 and 4 suitcases....and 3 fishing rods
Highs:
We have both gone from working for other people to working for ourselves....Something that we would never have thought about in the UK
We have adopted two wonderful kids...Something we would NEVER have even thought about in the UK
We own a nice smallish house about 100mtrs from the beach
and....have a lovely boat that we can go out fishing whenever we get chance.
Lows
We have really stuggled to make friends here....and I think we are not bad people...but we do not want to spend endless days with fellow Brits and this is where we have come unstuck. We cannot make Kiwi friends we have tried and tried but to no avail.
The homes here are soooooo expensive especially when you compare the cost of mortgages to salaries
The homes are damp...we installed a heat pump last year but I have developed really bad asthma since living here and find the mould on the window cills in the kids bedrooms very scary (Exit Mould helps mind you) Many houses have a funny smell to them because of the damp.
We live in a country that is run by a nightmare government who dones nothing to help business owners and make crazy poilicies regarding all sorts of crap that none of the Kiwis want.
The "Brain Drain" is getting so bad we are losing skilled workers by the hundreds to Australia which is currently booming. And why not when salaries are 25% better over there (At least) and the cost of living is considerably lower.
I really believe that NZ is going to the dogs. If I had the chance to tell people whether to move here or not my answer would be a big NO...Don't do it.
The gangs are getting worse...the traffic system is getting worse...theres no LIFE here as everywhere closes down at 8pm (Unless you live in the city), theres nowhere to go on holiday...there is no culture, there is NO passion...NZ is truly the most boring place on earth. After 5 years here I look at my life and think I have achieved so much but so little. Will I move from NZ the answer is YES. I cannot see myself growing old here...I am 33 years old and feel as if I am living the life of a 70 year old. But we are stuck here for the time being....Maybe for another 4 years or so...Where will I go well I am not sure...But one thing I do know is if you are looking to move to NZ do not come unless you know exactly what you are getting yourself into. If you are quite content to become very old before your time then thats great...If you want to struggle your ass off financially the come to NZ to live but remember.....
The beauty of NZ will not pay the mortgage and when you are skint and bored the beauty will not make up for it....After 5 years here I think I am qualified to say such things
Thanks
Hubbie and I arrived in NZ with$15000 and 4 suitcases....and 3 fishing rods
Highs:
We have both gone from working for other people to working for ourselves....Something that we would never have thought about in the UK
We have adopted two wonderful kids...Something we would NEVER have even thought about in the UK
We own a nice smallish house about 100mtrs from the beach
and....have a lovely boat that we can go out fishing whenever we get chance.
Lows
We have really stuggled to make friends here....and I think we are not bad people...but we do not want to spend endless days with fellow Brits and this is where we have come unstuck. We cannot make Kiwi friends we have tried and tried but to no avail.
The homes here are soooooo expensive especially when you compare the cost of mortgages to salaries
The homes are damp...we installed a heat pump last year but I have developed really bad asthma since living here and find the mould on the window cills in the kids bedrooms very scary (Exit Mould helps mind you) Many houses have a funny smell to them because of the damp.
We live in a country that is run by a nightmare government who dones nothing to help business owners and make crazy poilicies regarding all sorts of crap that none of the Kiwis want.
The "Brain Drain" is getting so bad we are losing skilled workers by the hundreds to Australia which is currently booming. And why not when salaries are 25% better over there (At least) and the cost of living is considerably lower.
I really believe that NZ is going to the dogs. If I had the chance to tell people whether to move here or not my answer would be a big NO...Don't do it.
The gangs are getting worse...the traffic system is getting worse...theres no LIFE here as everywhere closes down at 8pm (Unless you live in the city), theres nowhere to go on holiday...there is no culture, there is NO passion...NZ is truly the most boring place on earth. After 5 years here I look at my life and think I have achieved so much but so little. Will I move from NZ the answer is YES. I cannot see myself growing old here...I am 33 years old and feel as if I am living the life of a 70 year old. But we are stuck here for the time being....Maybe for another 4 years or so...Where will I go well I am not sure...But one thing I do know is if you are looking to move to NZ do not come unless you know exactly what you are getting yourself into. If you are quite content to become very old before your time then thats great...If you want to struggle your ass off financially the come to NZ to live but remember.....
The beauty of NZ will not pay the mortgage and when you are skint and bored the beauty will not make up for it....After 5 years here I think I am qualified to say such things
Thanks
As a Kiwi of 65 years married to a Brit who has lived all of her life in NZ apart from 11 years spent in four other countries I have a great deal of empathy for you.
I am in no way defending the NZ lifestyle but I must say that if I landed here 5 years ago with a few suitcases and $15000 I would consider that I had sone really well managing to set myself up in business.
Facts are NZ is no different to any other country, it has positives and negatives and for you at this point the negatives seem to outway the positives.
We have lived and worked in South Auckland for the best part of 35 years and what I know is I feel safer here than I ever felt elsewhere. In fact I could be saying much of what you have said when living in the UK and Aus.
Maybe it is time for you to move on, only you can decide that.
Good luck and my very best wishes for your future, wherever it may take you.
By the Kiwi's are very friendly people and tend to accept others for who they are but they will not change their cultural concepts to fit others.
That has been my experience in every country I have lived in.
