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advice for emigrating with 5 year old son

advice for emigrating with 5 year old son

Old May 15th 2013, 7:02 pm
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Default advice for emigrating with 5 year old son

My husband and I are considering emigrating to New Zealand as my husband works in construction and may be able to help with the rebuild in Christchurch.
One thing we are concerned about is taking our 5 year old son away from his grandma as he has a major bond with her.
Can anyone offer any advice about this and also provide some general advice about schools in New Zealand and childcare such as before and after schools clubs?
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Old May 15th 2013, 8:11 pm
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Default Re: advice for emigrating with 5 year old son

I think before you start you need to establish if you can actually get a visa that would allow you to live and work here.

have a look on the Immigration website http://www.immigration.govt.nz/migra...k/workperm.htm

bonds with family members are always going to be difficult, does your mother/inlaw know of you intentions to emigrate ? Is she going to be helpful or put a guilt trip on you?

Schools vary from place to place. kids start on their 5th b/day. schools can either be primary (5yrs old-8yrs) full primary (9yrs-12yrs) and then college.
as for after school care there are after school care clubs (i run one) but there are also childminders. much the same as the UK. But it does all depend on where you are and your need.
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Old May 15th 2013, 8:26 pm
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Default Re: advice for emigrating with 5 year old son

Thanks for the reply, we have gone through the first stages of the process and our assessed score puts us into the automatic selection category. As a Civil Engineer my hubby will be more than likely be looking at Christchurch and it's surrounding area with the rebuild happening at the moment.
We have talked it over with both sets of parents and although my family accept our decision my in-laws are giving us the guilt trip over taking our little boy away from them and it's really affecting my husband even though he accepts its the best thing for our family.
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Old May 15th 2013, 8:47 pm
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Default Re: advice for emigrating with 5 year old son

guilt trips, lots of that going on for members so do sympathise.

Even though you say you have enough points without a job offer I would say not to come over lock stock and barrel as some have done that and have foundit extremely hard to gain work despite being told by agencies before hand that lots of it around. Christchurch isn't a hub of activity that they are making out it is from what I have read and seen on the news. Contractors going bust and sub contractors not being able to get their equipment etc.
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Old May 15th 2013, 8:53 pm
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Default Re: advice for emigrating with 5 year old son

That's interesting to know, we had pretty much decided to find a job offer before making the move as hubby would prefer the security that offers but your answer just confirms what we were thinking.
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Old May 15th 2013, 10:04 pm
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Default Re: advice for emigrating with 5 year old son

Originally Posted by ramacesuk View Post
it's really affecting my husband even though he accepts its the best thing for our family.
Why? If he is gainfully employed in the UK currently, there is no way it is a given that it is the best thing for your family

As someone else recently put it, if you are coming from a Third World country NZ is probably 'better' but if you are coming from a First World country like the UK, it is simply different, not necessarily better.
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Old May 15th 2013, 10:09 pm
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Default Re: advice for emigrating with 5 year old son

Originally Posted by MrsFychan View Post
Christchurch isn't a hub of activity that they are making out it is from what I have read and seen on the news. Contractors going bust and sub contractors not being able to get their equipment etc.
Yes, do not believe the NZ hype.
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Old May 15th 2013, 10:13 pm
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Default Re: advice for emigrating with 5 year old son

Originally Posted by luvwelly View Post
Why? If he is gainfully employed in the UK currently, there is no way it is a given that it is the best thing for your family

As someone else recently put it, if you are coming from a Third World country NZ is probably 'better' but if you are coming from a First World country like the UK, it is simply different, not necessarily better.
Completely depends on where they are though

Like every first world country there's good parts and bad parts. They might be living in Cornwall which would make me question that comment, or they might be living in the Tower Hamlets borough of London which would mean that comment is very true

Where are you currently based ramacesuk?

Oh and be very careful with this Christchurch rebuild. I'm expecting some cutbacks in todays budget. It isn't the guaranteed job malarkey they try to make out it is. There's a reason why more Kiwis are doing construction/engineering courses now and there's a reason why a lot of the rebuild companies are going bust

Plus, there's the housing situation. Now that'll be interesting to witness what Mr English does about that
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Old May 15th 2013, 11:48 pm
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Default Re: advice for emigrating with 5 year old son

Originally Posted by ramacesuk View Post
One thing we are concerned about is taking our 5 year old son away from his grandma as he has a major bond with her.
I hope you don't mind me asking but what is so great about NZ that it is worth severing this strong link?
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Old May 16th 2013, 8:30 am
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Default Re: advice for emigrating with 5 year old son

Originally Posted by Assanah View Post
I hope you don't mind me asking but what is so great about NZ that it is worth severing this strong link?
We don't often see eye-to-eye Assanah, but based on our experience I would ask a similar question.

Depends on where you are currently, the lifestyle you currently have and job prospects in the UK. I am very unconvinced by the Christchurch job bonanza. The hype really doesn't seem to match many people's experience.

Good luck, whatever your decision, taking kids away from family is always tough and the one thing that on a daily basis continues to cause us heartache (after 9 years).
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Old May 16th 2013, 9:48 am
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Default Re: advice for emigrating with 5 year old son

Hi all, hubby here.
We originally planned on emigrating 5-6 years ago before our DS was born, but with work and prospects good we decided against it despite having regrets.
Now work is much harder to get, I am freelancing as I can't find permanent work with the construction industry still badly affected by the recession and it's very piecemeal what is available. Being in East Anglia doesn't help as we are on one edge of the country.
We hadn't really considered leaving the UK again until I was contacted regarding a job with one of the big multi national companies working in Christchurch, but having not had the chance to research anything beforehand we didn't feel ready to just jump without knowing what we were going to. The money was a lot more than I was on in the UK and it was a permanent contract rather than temporary, so we would be much better off than we are, with the possibility of moving to Australia with the company at a later date.
I have been asking myself a lot if taking him away is the right thing to do, hence why we are looking for advice from others who have been in the same situation, we have no intention of moving without a job as I know from experience it's not as easy as all the agencies make out to find a position!
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Old May 16th 2013, 9:43 pm
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Default Re: advice for emigrating with 5 year old son

The plans I've seen for Christchurch look great. I imagine it would be very rewarding participating in such a huge project, remembering that basically the whole CBD needs to be rebuilt. Good luck with your move and hope your son adapts quickly, which he may well do once he starts school.
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Old May 17th 2013, 6:10 am
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Default Re: advice for emigrating with 5 year old son

Just a thought Ramacesuk,

If you are job hunting prior to leaving the UK, have a look at Taranaki as it has a strong economy and it's where my OH received a job offer from the UK. We're financially better off in NZ and have been lucky that work opportunites have come our way for both of us.

On the flip side, I too took my daughters away from their beloved grandparents and I continue to feel guilty and sad about that.

Good luck whatever you decide to do.
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Old Jun 4th 2013, 1:08 am
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Default Re: advice for emigrating with 5 year old son

Hi, we moved to Christchurch in Jan 2012 with a then 3 and 1 year old. My eldest is now 5 (and we have a new addition too ) My husband works on the rebuild and has found it really interesting, although busy! In our opinion we have a much better life here, coming from an industry in the UK that was declining and businesses going bust (husband is a geotechnical engineer/geologist) and really struggling, my husband has a good and secure job here, so I definitely understand your problem!
We love Christchurch and everything it has to offer us, and I think my children have a better life than they did in the UK, mainly due to space here and the outdoor lifestyle. Everyone is different, but for us it was the best choice. My daughter has just started primary school so I can help with advice for that if you need.
My kids were close to my mum, but she comes out once a year and they talk to her on Skype a lot so that helps, although obviously it is not the same.
Good luck with it all Ask if you need any advice and I'll do my best
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Old Jun 4th 2013, 2:37 am
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Default Re: advice for emigrating with 5 year old son

You could tell the grandparents the job offer is only for a year or two and then come over for a bit of an adventure? The schools in chch are of a very high standand still and there are a lot of community values attached to the schools - just hard with housing at the moment as there is short supply but not impossible.
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