ShozInOz

If you have pinged back to Aus for a second go, or plan to, what were your reasons?

chance to be

Hi Shoz,
How are you? (must say im surprised YOU have the pingpong thoughts so soon? )
For me I am in a very different situation to you. I will start with why I left in the first place to give a background. In short, I was very homesick and lack of work, money etc etc was putting a huge strain on everything, including our relationship. Things got so bad for me I couldn’t see the wood for the trees and basically couldn’t see any option but to move back to the UK while we still had funds to do that.
So the reason, on bad days, I consider ping ponging is this,
You made a joint decision to move back. We did not. Sometimes I look at OH, and I feel so crap that I took away his dreams too (when he wasn’t ready). It eats me up that I could do that to someone I care so much about. We returned when I couldn’t cope to him finding it hard here. And he has done all this for me. That’s love. What have we gained? So,.. for me its unfinished business. Why wasn’t I able to stick it out for 2yrs? Why didn’t I make peace with the place/do everything I dreamed about before I left? What was it about me as a person that didn’t cut the mustard? If I address these issues now, can I be successful next time?
I had a great circle of friends in Oz, a great job, fantastic social life. Wasn’t this the dream?
I think people don’t feel the need to ping pong when they have been successful and are happy in their new country but just feel its right to move on, not because other issues (unemployment, illness etc etc ) dictate. They don’t have the “what if “ factor as they’ve done it.
I can’t answer these questions now so am not in a position to even seriously think about another move. But, the desire to succeed, even if only to get C ship, and BIG YES – THE WEATHER (has a huge effect on me) will be the deciding factor in the long run.
In terms of kids (I know this is important to you), I think if you have a good area in the UK, the opportunities are far greater than in Oz – but the area and lifestyle you can offer is paramount. Kids don’t notice grey skies, only old people do! I would say, be a middle class kid in the Uk, a working class one in Oz! Where you are happy as parents will determine where the kids are happy, nothing else.
Don’t think you will move for the kids. We as humans are basically selfish. We are moving for ourselves and using the kids as a justification. Be true to your own motives.
Good luck with your thoughts and if anyone has any advice on getting worms back in cans, let me know!
C

dr-dak

Hi

I first went to aus about 4 years ago on my PR visa. I went solely on my own as a young 26 year old. I had a job with an airline as an Aircraft engineer. I arrived in Sydney all excited and went to stay at a backpackers in coogee. whilst there i got talking with many young backpackers and decided after 3 months working to leave my job and go travelling. After 8 months i came home for a visit and then went back again for 5 months more travel.
Since being back in the uk i have continued to long for the australian lifestyle. I am now married with a 5 month old daughter and am ready to go back and experience australia as a none backpacker.I have 5 months left to make the move before the Pr visa runs out. My wife and daughter have submitted applications for spouse visa on my Pr. We intend to travel in april and buy a property. Having experienced Aus before, i feel ready now as an adult to settle and enjoy life with my own family over there. I will miss my parents and family but they will visit...Nothing is forever we may go back and forth for the next 40 years. The main thing is just to enjoy every moment of life and not to be afraid to try things away from the norm!!

chance to be

LOL you are right!

forgot to add to v long (sorry) reply before that I think that when you are in Oz and want to go back, often people say, try it a little longer and it'll get better.

you may or not be in a position to take this (or want to) take this advice.

But i would suggest when back in the Uk, you may experience regret, bewilderment, confusion all over again but in reverse - so this time HEED the advice. !!! Stay in the Uk a decent amount of time before even contemplating a pingpong back. You (talking from experience) really need to be sure your heads in the right place first and its not reverse culture shock or reverse rose specs rearing their ugly heads (again!)

be easy on yourself when you come back and live each day as it comes for a while.

ShozInOz

Hi C

Yes, the weather. Seems shallow compared to what I thought I missed about the UK! Trouble is, with a toddler now in tow, and for half of the year or more, we can't get out to enjoy what we thought we missed (e.g. national parks, historic places). What I missed about the UK is now so hard or expensive to see and do anyway, so I miss it even now when I live here! We've realised that it's the ability to just go out and relax in the evenings and weekends, throughout the year, that makes us feel heathy and happy. We've basically decided to go back to Sydney, though are not rushing straight back - we'll wait until late 2008 to fulfill some of our UK-related goals at least.

Take care
S

chance to be

very envious of you when you talk by saying "we". Although terrifying, I say I will give it another go, but OH had to live with how disturbed I was, and he cant go back to that risk of it happening again. we lost all our money out there so it would be impossible to pingpong again.
you are right to wait til 2008 - at least you can say you have given it a good go back here before you move - and who knows, you may feel better about being here so not want to go by then!
Im sure whatever you do it will be well considered, so fine
c

FPM

Non UK/ non Australian wife couldn't settle in the UK. But we're slowly working through the issues and to be honest she's much keener now.

So I've gone UK-Aus-UK-Aus and will be going to UK again (at some point) but we've both agreed while it'll be great to be there for some time, neither of us want to retire there, so there will be another move after that but by then the wife will have an EU passport.

I've resigned myself to never really being settled anywhere, but hopefully the next move to UK will be it for the next 10 - 15yrs or so.

sarah34

[QUOTE=ShozInOz;4298335]If you have pinged back to Aus for a second go, or plan to, what were your reasons?[/QU

We returned from oz in 2004 now are going back this year on a PR.
reasons we came back to uk was the sale of house fell through it was hard work keeping a mortgage and renting in oz on OH wage we was on a 457 visa.
With the stress of money problems homesickness came to. Cut a long story short the easy option was to head home, well didnt stop thinking about life
in oz so here we are now with house up for sale and not leaving till signed for.
I still worry that it may not work for us but we are more determind than the last time. Still think that uk is heading in wrong direction for us as a family too many reasons to mention here on this thread. We feel more excited and wiser second time round.

daisylilymum

Best of luck to you x