Are We Being Punished ?

Old Nov 14th 2011, 8:43 pm
  #106  
Septicity
 
fatbrit's Avatar
 
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 23,762
fatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Are We Being Punished ?

Here we go: http://britishexpats.com/forum/showthread.php?t=738757

Someone taking offence at someone trying to help them.
fatbrit is offline  
Old Nov 14th 2011, 9:17 pm
  #107  
Account Closed
 
Joined: Jun 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 4,891
materialcontroller has a reputation beyond reputematerialcontroller has a reputation beyond reputematerialcontroller has a reputation beyond reputematerialcontroller has a reputation beyond reputematerialcontroller has a reputation beyond reputematerialcontroller has a reputation beyond reputematerialcontroller has a reputation beyond reputematerialcontroller has a reputation beyond reputematerialcontroller has a reputation beyond reputematerialcontroller has a reputation beyond reputematerialcontroller has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Are We Being Punished ?

Originally Posted by Sally Redux
A comment about the American Dream is hardly a 'barrage of scorn' - get real mate.
I'm most definitely not your "mate".
materialcontroller is offline  
Old Nov 14th 2011, 9:19 pm
  #108  
Septicity
 
fatbrit's Avatar
 
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 23,762
fatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Are We Being Punished ?

Originally Posted by materialcontroller
I'm most definitely not your mate.
Sally's a fine mate to have. Your loss!
fatbrit is offline  
Old Nov 14th 2011, 9:29 pm
  #109  
Septic Sprout
 
tonrob's Avatar
 
Joined: Aug 2004
Location: Shanghai
Posts: 7,993
tonrob has a reputation beyond reputetonrob has a reputation beyond reputetonrob has a reputation beyond reputetonrob has a reputation beyond reputetonrob has a reputation beyond reputetonrob has a reputation beyond reputetonrob has a reputation beyond reputetonrob has a reputation beyond reputetonrob has a reputation beyond reputetonrob has a reputation beyond reputetonrob has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Are We Being Punished ?

Originally Posted by fatbrit
Here we go: http://britishexpats.com/forum/showthread.php?t=738757

Someone taking offence at someone trying to help them.
Some people really do need to keep their knickers on. This thread is a prime example. People expect free advice with a cherry on top to boot.

This forum is moderated in accordance with the published rules. If it's not to someone's taste then surely they're free to pick another forum or start their own. The length to which this whinging is going on is nothing short of pathetic.
tonrob is offline  
Old Nov 14th 2011, 9:41 pm
  #110  
Lost in BE Cyberspace
 
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 41,518
Sally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Are We Being Punished ?

Originally Posted by fatbrit
Sally's a fine mate to have. Your loss!
Sally Redux is offline  
Old Nov 14th 2011, 9:43 pm
  #111  
Septicity
 
fatbrit's Avatar
 
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 23,762
fatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond reputefatbrit has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Are We Being Punished ?

Originally Posted by tonrob
Some people really do need to keep their knickers on. This thread is a prime example. People expect free advice with a cherry on top to boot.

This forum is moderated in accordance with the published rules. If it's not to someone's taste then surely they're free to pick another forum or start their own. The length to which this whinging is going on is nothing short of pathetic.
Is it my own bias, or is the word FLORIDA appearing in a thread a precursor to a thread going right down the tubes?
fatbrit is offline  
Old Nov 14th 2011, 9:59 pm
  #112  
Septic Sprout
 
tonrob's Avatar
 
Joined: Aug 2004
Location: Shanghai
Posts: 7,993
tonrob has a reputation beyond reputetonrob has a reputation beyond reputetonrob has a reputation beyond reputetonrob has a reputation beyond reputetonrob has a reputation beyond reputetonrob has a reputation beyond reputetonrob has a reputation beyond reputetonrob has a reputation beyond reputetonrob has a reputation beyond reputetonrob has a reputation beyond reputetonrob has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Are We Being Punished ?

Originally Posted by fatbrit
Is it my own bias, or is the word FLORIDA appearing in a thread a precursor to a thread going right down the tubes?
Statistically it's going to go tits up sooner rather than later, that's for sure.
tonrob is offline  
Old Nov 14th 2011, 11:52 pm
  #113  
Lost in BE Cyberspace
 
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 41,518
Sally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Are We Being Punished ?

Originally Posted by tonrob
Statistically it's going to go tits up sooner rather than later, that's for sure.
So was she a US citizen or not?




Boyo
Sally Redux is offline  
Old Nov 15th 2011, 12:20 am
  #114  
Forum Regular
Thread Starter
 
Joined: Aug 2011
Posts: 38
le10 is just really nicele10 is just really nicele10 is just really nicele10 is just really nicele10 is just really nicele10 is just really nicele10 is just really nicele10 is just really nicele10 is just really nicele10 is just really nice
Default Re: Are We Being Punished ?

Well being the OP, I'd like to comment.... :-)

I am very grateful for anybody taking time out to help me out...I genuinely am.

My reaction to the first response was unnecessary, partly because I had only just heard of my mothers diagnosis, and partly because just because somebody feels qualified to sum up somebody else's experience in a couple of words, doesn't make it helpful or kind.

A response that fails to take into count the context, feelings and experiences of the questioner, appears judgmental. Of course a responder is also not a mind reader.

However, any notion that I had unrealistic expectations etc. could surely only be reached after a fair amount of information had been exchanged.

In any case, how can you have entirely realistic expectations over something you've never done before ?

I'm glad I didn't know before, what I know now. I never would have done this, and that would have been a shame.

My original post was really just an opportunity to vent the frustrations over the past few months...nothing more..

Fact is...a forum is the wrong place for this.

Lesson learnt.
le10 is offline  
Old Nov 15th 2011, 12:32 am
  #115  
SUPER MODERATOR
 
Jerseygirl's Avatar
 
Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 87,987
Jerseygirl has a reputation beyond reputeJerseygirl has a reputation beyond reputeJerseygirl has a reputation beyond reputeJerseygirl has a reputation beyond reputeJerseygirl has a reputation beyond reputeJerseygirl has a reputation beyond reputeJerseygirl has a reputation beyond reputeJerseygirl has a reputation beyond reputeJerseygirl has a reputation beyond reputeJerseygirl has a reputation beyond reputeJerseygirl has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Are We Being Punished ?

Originally Posted by le10
Well being the OP, I'd like to comment.... :-)

I am very grateful for anybody taking time out to help me out...I genuinely am.

My reaction to the first response was unnecessary, partly because I had only just heard of my mothers diagnosis, and partly because just because somebody feels qualified to sum up somebody else's experience in a couple of words, doesn't make it helpful or kind.

A response that fails to take into count the context, feelings and experiences of the questioner, appears judgmental. Of course a responder is also not a mind reader.

However, any notion that I had unrealistic expectations etc. could surely only be reached after a fair amount of information had been exchanged.

In any case, how can you have entirely realistic expectations over something you've never done before ?

I'm glad I didn't know before, what I know now. I never would have done this, and that would have been a shame.

My original post was really just an opportunity to vent the frustrations over the past few months...nothing more..

Fact is...a forum is the wrong place for this.

Lesson learnt.
It's not the wrong place but perhaps it was the wrong time. IMO it's best to get to know people and let them get to know you before you open yourself up too much. Many of us have gone through difficult periods and have had great support from the other members.

Don't give up on us...get to know the players and let us get to know you. I think you'll find our members are fantastic at helping and supporting each other. Stick around.
Jerseygirl is offline  
Old Nov 15th 2011, 12:59 am
  #116  
BE Forum Addict
 
Joined: Apr 2011
Location: Maine
Posts: 1,204
Karrie72 has a reputation beyond reputeKarrie72 has a reputation beyond reputeKarrie72 has a reputation beyond reputeKarrie72 has a reputation beyond reputeKarrie72 has a reputation beyond reputeKarrie72 has a reputation beyond reputeKarrie72 has a reputation beyond reputeKarrie72 has a reputation beyond reputeKarrie72 has a reputation beyond reputeKarrie72 has a reputation beyond reputeKarrie72 has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Are We Being Punished ?

Originally Posted by materialcontroller
There's a time and a place for everything. And I might suggest that posting sarcastic comments in reply to anybody who has come looking for help and advice is just incredibly bad manners. Yes, and that does include "Kev from Basildon".

If you all want to take the piss and slap each other on the back at how on the edge your cutting satirical retorts are, you can do that in other parts of the forum without subjecting new members to a barrage of scorn and ridicule in the immigration section of BE.
I have to say i agree with this, there are some on here that come across as extremely blunt and hostile especially in the immigration to the US section. It's almost like a 'nah, nah, ni, nah, nah' vibe, well we got in but you have no chance and we'll make fun of you and demean you as well, yay fun times!

I do understand how hard working the mods are and how difficult it must be to see the same old themes and questions come up. But then again they agree to that role so it must be rewarding in some way.

The rest of us come on to support and enjoy each others company and hopefully not act like 'p*****'
Karrie72 is offline  
Old Nov 15th 2011, 2:13 am
  #117  
Lost in BE Cyberspace
 
Joined: Jan 2008
Posts: 41,518
Sally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond reputeSally Redux has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Are We Being Punished ?

I freely admit that I had unrealistic expectations when I came here. Nothing to get defensive about.
Sally Redux is offline  
Old Nov 15th 2011, 4:00 am
  #118  
Bob
BE Site Lead
 
Bob's Avatar
 
Joined: Aug 2004
Location: MA, USA
Posts: 92,167
Bob has a reputation beyond reputeBob has a reputation beyond reputeBob has a reputation beyond reputeBob has a reputation beyond reputeBob has a reputation beyond reputeBob has a reputation beyond reputeBob has a reputation beyond reputeBob has a reputation beyond reputeBob has a reputation beyond reputeBob has a reputation beyond reputeBob has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Are We Being Punished ?

Originally Posted by Sally Redux
So was she a US citizen or not?




Boyo


That was particularly amusing.
Bob is offline  
Old Nov 15th 2011, 4:04 am
  #119  
Bob
BE Site Lead
 
Bob's Avatar
 
Joined: Aug 2004
Location: MA, USA
Posts: 92,167
Bob has a reputation beyond reputeBob has a reputation beyond reputeBob has a reputation beyond reputeBob has a reputation beyond reputeBob has a reputation beyond reputeBob has a reputation beyond reputeBob has a reputation beyond reputeBob has a reputation beyond reputeBob has a reputation beyond reputeBob has a reputation beyond reputeBob has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Are We Being Punished ?

Originally Posted by Jerseygirl

Don't give up on us...get to know the players and let us get to know you. I think you'll find our members are fantastic at helping and supporting each other. Stick around.
The fact the OP has come back, after 8 pages is props to him really....also didn't need his second post hanging over his head, it's done and dusted and most people have moved on.

So, almost a couple weeks on...hope things have improved and hope there's better news about the mother.
Bob is offline  
Old Nov 15th 2011, 1:40 pm
  #120  
Account Closed
 
Joined: Aug 2002
Location: Kentucky
Posts: 38,865
ian-mstm has a reputation beyond reputeian-mstm has a reputation beyond reputeian-mstm has a reputation beyond reputeian-mstm has a reputation beyond reputeian-mstm has a reputation beyond reputeian-mstm has a reputation beyond reputeian-mstm has a reputation beyond reputeian-mstm has a reputation beyond reputeian-mstm has a reputation beyond reputeian-mstm has a reputation beyond reputeian-mstm has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Are We Being Punished ?

Originally Posted by le10
However, any notion that I had unrealistic expectations etc. could surely only be reached after a fair amount of information had been exchanged.
Since I made the comment, let me say that you had already shared a "fair amount of information". To wit...

1) I had to live in a hotel for 11 weeks till we found a house
Did you expect to find a house immediately?

2) Our stuff got picked on by customs with a four week delay and $4500 in fees
A quick Google search would have demonstrated that this is quite common. I agree it’s a pain in the arse, and you were probably the victim of a scam... but it’s common.

3) Customs caused $15,000 of damage to our possessions during the search
Well, that's unfortunate... but often happens. That said, it's not their responsibility to treat your possessions as precious cargo. You had an agreement with the shipping company, not with US Customs.

4) The house we are buying is a short sell and is taking forever to close
A lengthy closing is always true for a short sale.

5) We are living in the house on a rental basis till we close and we have discovered numerous issues including high levels of Radon in the water, leaking roof etc. so much that we don't even particularly like the house anymore.
I can't speak to your not liking the house, but these other issues might have been discovered during a home inspection. And, even if they weren't, they're quite common in the area.

6) We have experienced a heatwave, a hurricane and a blizzard
Except for the hurricane, which isn't entirely unknown in the area, heatwaves and blizzards are quite common in the NJ/NY area.

7) The storm at the weekend destroyed all the lovely trees in our front garden.
Alas, this is what happens after such storms.

All of these events, while not necessarily preventable, are reasonably common occurrences. You were unprepared; you didn't do your homework... and, to me, that translated to unrealistic expectations.

At this point, I'm pretty sure I've been put in the same box as those people who post "one sentence responses" which you don't value. So, there it is.

Ian

Last edited by ian-mstm; Nov 15th 2011 at 1:51 pm.
ian-mstm is offline  

Contact Us - Archive - Advertising - Cookie Policy - Privacy Statement - Terms of Service -

Copyright © 2024 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved. Use of this site indicates your consent to the Terms of Use.