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-   -   Time to go home (https://britishexpats.com/forum/moving-back-uk-61/time-go-home-722739/)

Desire Jun 27th 2011 6:17 pm

Time to go home
 
For those that remember me......i've been unhappy for a long time.
Arrived in Oz 2005 with Hubby, 2 girls then aged 8 and 10.
I've never felt a comfortable feeling of belonging and believe me i have really tried. Over the last few months i've started having only as i can describe as "panic attacks" in shops, at work and even going out with friends.
Thursday i have a follow up visit with the Doctor, he thinks i may have high blood pressure......i wasn't fully honest last week when i went about these panic attacks, i feel such a failure. It's only my 3rd visit to the Doctors in 6 years that i've been here.
I still long to go home, only now i'm out numbered within the family....hubby and eldest daughter love it here, youngest i think could take it or leave it.
Eldest daughter is now in year 11 so i feel i can't uproot the family now.
I'm waffling now, not quite sure where this is going? just makes me feel better within myself....

jad n rich Jun 27th 2011 6:37 pm

Re: Time to go home
 

Originally Posted by Desire (Post 9461496)
For those that remember me......i've been unhappy for a long time.
Arrived in Oz 2005 with Hubby, 2 girls then aged 8 and 10.
I've never felt a comfortable feeling of belonging and believe me i have really tried. Over the last few months i've started having only as i can describe as "panic attacks" in shops, at work and even going out with friends.
Thursday i have a follow up visit with the Doctor, he thinks i may have high blood pressure......i wasn't fully honest last week when i went about these panic attacks, i feel such a failure. It's only my 3rd visit to the Doctors in 6 years that i've been here.
I still long to go home, only now i'm out numbered within the family....hubby and eldest daughter love it here, youngest i think could take it or leave it.
Eldest daughter is now in year 11 so i feel i can't uproot the family now.
I'm waffling now, not quite sure where this is going? just makes me feel better within myself....


Cant really offer much great advice, but there are many of us with teens in high school who appreciate how difficult it is to move then.

We have plans in place for after that, with luck:rolleyes: will pan out with the correct timing and all fall into place - yeah and pigs will fly:lol:

Anyway you are not alone. :)

lilyprecious Jun 27th 2011 10:04 pm

Re: Time to go home
 

Originally Posted by Desire (Post 9461496)
For those that remember me......i've been unhappy for a long time.
Arrived in Oz 2005 with Hubby, 2 girls then aged 8 and 10.
I've never felt a comfortable feeling of belonging and believe me i have really tried. Over the last few months i've started having only as i can describe as "panic attacks" in shops, at work and even going out with friends.
Thursday i have a follow up visit with the Doctor, he thinks i may have high blood pressure......i wasn't fully honest last week when i went about these panic attacks, i feel such a failure. It's only my 3rd visit to the Doctors in 6 years that i've been here.
I still long to go home, only now i'm out numbered within the family....hubby and eldest daughter love it here, youngest i think could take it or leave it.
Eldest daughter is now in year 11 so i feel i can't uproot the family now.
I'm waffling now, not quite sure where this is going? just makes me feel better within myself....

you poor bugger you! i have lived in australia with my partner coming up for 3 years. I started feeling homesick about a year in (after all the excitement had worn off) Since then, I have visited my GP non-stop. I NEVER used to go the GP in the UK, no need to. Here, im there all the bloody time for "anxiety and stress" Its bizarre to me how i can be stressed when we're meant to be "living the dream'! ho ho ho!

Let me tell you, you are NOT a failure. at all. You are entitled to feel how you feel. Have u spoken to your other half? You cannot be miserable forever, thats no life! and the girls may notice after a while. Even if teenagers appear to live on a different planet. I'd discuss the situation, see what they think.

For me -I've never felt 'at home' in Australia, i always feel like im missing something. I miss my parents and sisters and their children etc, i'm very fortunate to still have a couple of grandparents still knocking around so i'd love to move backto see them too. My partner isnt keen to move back, infact i think i shall be coaxing him on the plane with whiskey. We have no children, so i know its a little easier for us but after telling him and him witnessing me not coping, i think we'll go back after permenant residency is granted. Let me know how you get on, will you? All the best lovey

brits1 Jun 28th 2011 6:48 am

Re: Time to go home
 

Originally Posted by Desire (Post 9461496)
For those that remember me......i've been unhappy for a long time.
Arrived in Oz 2005 with Hubby, 2 girls then aged 8 and 10.
I've never felt a comfortable feeling of belonging and believe me i have really tried. Over the last few months i've started having only as i can describe as "panic attacks" in shops, at work and even going out with friends.
Thursday i have a follow up visit with the Doctor, he thinks i may have high blood pressure......i wasn't fully honest last week when i went about these panic attacks, i feel such a failure. It's only my 3rd visit to the Doctors in 6 years that i've been here.
I still long to go home, only now i'm out numbered within the family....hubby and eldest daughter love it here, youngest i think could take it or leave it.
Eldest daughter is now in year 11 so i feel i can't uproot the family now.
I'm waffling now, not quite sure where this is going? just makes me feel better within myself....

No better place than to waffle than this site..lol....firstly your not a Failure.....don't count visits to Doctors...that's what they are there for......does your OH know how much you are giving of yourself so the family can be in Australia?....if not then sit down and tell him just how you do feel and take it from there, if he does and still want to be in Aus then you do have a couple of choices....One go home for a visit maybe on your own or with the family, see how you feel then and if it's a 'fix' for you try and get home to visit as often as you can afford and if that can only be one person then you take that visit as often as you can. Two tell your OH you really do want to go home and see what he feels about that. Three Maybe have a plan to leave Australia (if you still feel like you do now in the future) by a certain date...ie when the girls leave school etc. Four...try having a chat with a councellor...often a stranger can look outside of your "box" so to speak. But please remember that there are many people in situations like your own or similar..your not alone, your not going "daft"...it's normal sometimes when life seems to be a "bad circle" to have panic attacks and with help by which I mean having chat's with your Sister's and close friends can help. Be easy on yourself it is a stressful situation when you feel like you are at the moment but remember life does have a way of working out some way or another and take each day as it comes. Take care xx

sueduffy Jun 29th 2011 7:06 pm

Re: Time to go home
 
Desire,have sent you a PM.

Sue

Beedubya Jun 30th 2011 12:30 am

Re: Time to go home
 
Kindest thoughts going to the OP, lots of us know how you are feeling, perhaps if you had a SERIOUS talk with your husband about how you really feel and how it is affecting your health, he may see things differently.

The thing is that when you have teenagers or soon to be teenagers you have to find a window of opportunity or before you know it, they will have boyfriends, then husbands then children of their own..........


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