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For those requiring urgent assistance

For those requiring urgent assistance

Old Jan 18th 2009, 2:58 am
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Exclamation For those requiring urgent assistance

After talking to Beth in this forum about her situation, I thought I would start a thread for those that are in need of urgent assistance to get back to the UK - for whatever reason.

Please feel free to post useful links to this.

Here are some links that I have found.


www.womensaid.org.uk

www.shelter.org.uk

www.crisis.org.uk

www.direct.gov.uk

www.dwp.gov.uk

www.housingcare.org

www.ych.org.uk



Please add anything that has either helped you or that you may feel could be useful to others.

I am amazed at the strength of some of the people on here, Ruby and Beth to name but two - not to mention the many others that have battled against the odds to better themselves or 'escape' a situation.

Anything that can help - benefits, disabled assistance, accommodation, temp agency links (decent ones that you have had experience with) - these could all help someone in a bad situation.

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Old Jan 18th 2009, 4:08 am
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Default Re: For those requiring urgent assistance

Originally Posted by Professional Princess
After talking to Beth in this forum about her situation, I thought I would start a thread for those that are in need of urgent assistance to get back to the UK - for whatever reason.

Please feel free to post useful links to this.

Here are some links that I have found.


www.womensaid.org.uk

www.shelter.org.uk

www.crisis.org.uk

www.direct.gov.uk

www.dwp.gov.uk

www.housingcare.org

www.ych.org.uk



Please add anything that has either helped you or that you may feel could be useful to others.

I am amazed at the strength of some of the people on here, Ruby and Beth to name but two - not to mention the many others that have battled against the odds to better themselves or 'escape' a situation.

Anything that can help - benefits, disabled assistance, accommodation, temp agency links (decent ones that you have had experience with) - these could all help someone in a bad situation.

Fantastic, many thanks for that
I've copied your links into the "UK Useful Links" sticky thread, but we'll keep this one running too for people to discuss and add other bits to
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Old Jan 18th 2009, 4:28 am
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Default Re: For those requiring urgent assistance

Great idea.

Citizens Advice
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Old Jan 18th 2009, 5:40 am
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Default Re: For those requiring urgent assistance

I think it would be nice if anyone who has been in the same or similar situation to Beth, Ruby and others - someone who has come through the other side and managed to leave one countr and get back to the UK, if they can post about it to give inspiration to others.

It must be such a lonely feeling and I cannot imagine what it feels like, at least on this site people can be a friend to someone in this situation.
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Old Jan 18th 2009, 7:00 am
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Default Re: For those requiring urgent assistance

I have been talking to Beth about her situation, she has been updating me personally and has asked if I could help her cut and do an update for her as she is not that familiar with computers and has been very busy as well with trying to organise things.

I have Beths permission to do her update for her and will keep you posted as well, Here is the update I received earlier and it is looking good.



Thanks for the heads up regards calling Social Services and everyone else i need to call. I promise i will not be deterred and will explain everything the only way i know how....with patience and truthfulness. I've always been quite confident on the phone, but am prepared that i'm probably going to have to speak to numerous people before i get the right person/dept to help me. I have my work cut out i know....but am confident it will all be worth it in the end. I also have the original Police and court reports from the previous Domestic Violence issue, thought that would help my case!

I am planning to go to the North Yorkshire area (town where i was born) and just take it from there. Trying to get a little extra money to stay in a motel or similar...if just for one night! Its going to be a long journey (19hrs travelling) so will need to rest up as much as i can. Unfortunately i take pain medication for severe pain in my back and legs (failed spinal fusion) and am unfortunatley permanently disabled, i can still manage with the use of a cane, and do know i can get disabled assistance with help from the airline, i have had excellent service previously, so that is reassuring at least.

I also spoke with a new neighbour today, he only moved in a little while ago so i hadn't had the chance to introduce myself properly. He mentioned he was looking for some second hand furniture (he's just a young guy starting out) so i explained i had a few things i could help him with if he was interested? Selling my furniture hadn't crossed my mind, i was ready to leave it all behind (even though it's originally mine shipped from England) He asked when i was leaving, and i told him hopefully within 14days? Was so glad i got the chance to talk to him, he even offered me a lift to the airport. What a difference a day can make

My ex will not be calling by the home for another 2 weeks, by then i hope and pray i will be back in England!! Unfortunatley i had to see him face to face today (usually he just leaves food on the doormat) he'd needed paperwork out of the office, and as strained and uncomfortable as it was.... just knowing it would be the very last time made it bearable. I remained as cordial as possible and gave no hint of my plans.

I'm excited and scared at the same time, but wheels are turning and theres no there's no going back now. Just wanted to give you an update, have been so busy i havent found time to eat yet and its now just gone 11.15pm (my time) so must try and get a bite to eat before i go to bed, need all the energy i can get as another busy day tomorrow!

Thanks again Sam
Love Beth
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Old Jan 18th 2009, 8:52 am
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Default Re: For those requiring urgent assistance

Fab work PP!!

I was thinking of setting something up in the UK for British women stranded abroad, but in reality it would be a while before I could focus on it as we would need to settle ourselves first.
I reckon there are thousands of women in various countries across the globe trapped like this. Especially with all the internet dating sites and unscrupulous men luring these women away with false promises.

Can you pass this on to Beth. I get regular emails from Travelodge about offers etc. They have heaps of rooms on sale at the moment for as little as £19 per night. She might like to check out their website for the heap motel she is looking for.

I have everything crossed for her!! Wish i was already there as i'd love to offer her help and support anyway i could
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Old Jan 18th 2009, 9:59 am
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Default Re: For those requiring urgent assistance

Originally Posted by Fleaflyfloflum
Fab work PP!!

I was thinking of setting something up in the UK for British women stranded abroad, but in reality it would be a while before I could focus on it as we would need to settle ourselves first.
I reckon there are thousands of women in various countries across the globe trapped like this. Especially with all the internet dating sites and unscrupulous men luring these women away with false promises.

Can you pass this on to Beth. I get regular emails from Travelodge about offers etc. They have heaps of rooms on sale at the moment for as little as £19 per night. She might like to check out their website for the heap motel she is looking for.

I have everything crossed for her!! Wish i was already there as i'd love to offer her help and support anyway i could

I will pass it on, thanks Flea.

I couldnt get her out of my head, had I the money I would help her and cannot imagine what she and probably lots of others are going through.

Im going to seek out some more links tomorrow at work when the connection is better for the internet.
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Old Jan 18th 2009, 10:14 am
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Default Re: For those requiring urgent assistance

This is a general post just with info and not specific to any current posters.

If you have pets and experience domestic violence, then there is help available. This is important if you can only get a new temporary place & can't take your animals.

http://www.refuge.org.uk/page_l1-2_l2-2456_.htm

For Scotland with links at the end.

http://www.animalsvoice.com/edits/ed..._as_pawns.html

Be careful leaving a very abusive partner, as there is a heightened risk just before and after leaving.
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Old Jan 18th 2009, 12:20 pm
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Default Re: For those requiring urgent assistance

Originally Posted by G586
This is a general post just with info and not specific to any current posters.

If you have pets and experience domestic violence, then there is help available. This is important if you can only get a new temporary place & can't take your animals.

http://www.refuge.org.uk/page_l1-2_l2-2456_.htm

For Scotland with links at the end.

http://www.animalsvoice.com/edits/ed..._as_pawns.html

Be careful leaving a very abusive partner, as there is a heightened risk just before and after leaving.

Thank you for adding those links - I know I would be devastated if I had to leave my pets in that situation.

I think pets play an important part in our lives and when I worked in the vets, saw many on the receiving end of the domestic violence pattern of events.

Keep the links coming guys and if anyone in the Yorkshire area (North?) can offer Beth any assistance on her arrival back in the United Kingdom - in the form of a lift, or just being a friend - that would be great.

I am still sourcing out links and info that could help:


http://www.grantahousing.org.uk/rent...ng/domviolence

www.healthyrelationships.org.uk

www.endabuse.org

http://www.bedandbreakfast-directory...0Yorkshire.htm

http://www.richmondshire.gov.uk/serv...available.aspx

http://www.northyorks.gov.uk/index.a...&textonly=True

http://www.heathrow-airport-guide.co...acilities.html - Beth, I urge you to look at this link as it is about disabled assistance on arrival at Heathrow.

Last edited by Cheetah7; Jan 18th 2009 at 12:45 pm.
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Old Jan 18th 2009, 12:32 pm
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Default Re: For those requiring urgent assistance

www.taxcredits.inlandrevenue.gov.uk

Hope it helps
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Old Jan 18th 2009, 12:56 pm
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Default Re: For those requiring urgent assistance

For anyone trying to get out of an abusive relationship male or female, just remember a few things:

1. It is not your fault - you did not choose for this to happen and you did not 'make' your partner do this to you.

2. You ARE worth something, you are as important as the next person - no matter what you are told to the contrary - you ARE valuable.

3. You ARE capable of retraining/changing direction in your life.

4. You CAN get out, you may need help doing so but you can get out.

5. People (decent) won't judge you for leaving your partner - if they do, they were never your friends in the first place.

6. Bide your time, keep calm - source out help when/if you are alone to avoid confrontation - get what you can in place to make your departure easier.

7. There is life after domestic abuse - my sister and many others are living proof of this.

8. The threats are terrifying and a powerful weapon into keeping you in your place - do NOT be afraid to take out an AVO/Injuction, DO NOT be afraid to involve the police.

9. If you have children involved then involve child protection, they are there to protect your kiddies - please get the law on your side.

10. Keep a diary of events, record everything - you never know when it might come in use.

11. Try if you can and I appreciate that this may not be possible, to keep enough money for a taxi fare, to make a phone call, or just to get you as far as the embassy/police station/friends house. If you are lucky enough to build up more cash then great.

12. Stay within the law, if you attempt to take your kids out of the country without permission then the law will not be on your side - find the number of the nearest womens refuge to aid and advise you on your rights, your kids safety and what you can do.

Finally, please do not give up - there is a way out, it may take time to find it/discover it, but if you try and keep a clear head then you will do it.

And I will say it again, it is NOT your fault.

I am hoping for an update from Beth tomorrow on her situation.
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Old Jan 18th 2009, 3:30 pm
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Default Re: For those requiring urgent assistance

Wonderful post an update PP thanks so much I've been thinking a lot about Beth and Ruth.
I hope she can get to a computer and update us once she is back and settled in UK.

Oh and I totally agree with #7. My sis is now happily married to man who isn't abusive so life can get better.
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Old Jan 18th 2009, 10:03 pm
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Default Re: For those requiring urgent assistance

Originally Posted by Mummy in the foothills
Wonderful post an update PP thanks so much I've been thinking a lot about Beth and Ruth.
I hope she can get to a computer and update us once she is back and settled in UK.

Oh and I totally agree with #7. My sis is now happily married to man who isn't abusive so life can get better.
If I lived in the UK, I would be there to meet Beth at the airport, I hate the thought of her arriving alone.
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Old Jan 19th 2009, 12:12 am
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Default Re: For those requiring urgent assistance

Awesome work PP.

Thank you to everyone for posting ALL useful and very informative links! I have also just posted a new update.

Bless your heart PP for wishing you could be at the airport to meet me, please don't worry....you are with me.....every step of the way, and will be thinking of you all....especially at the airport!!!

Love and (((hugs to all)))
Beth
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Old Jan 19th 2009, 12:45 am
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Default Re: For those requiring urgent assistance

On behalf of Beth, can I just check if anyone works in, knows anyone who works in or has experience in dealing with Social Services in N. Yorkshire - I can provide more details by PM.

Any help for this lady would be appreciated - anything in the way of support/transport/legal and financial advice.

She needs a break and anything that can make her life easier would be great.

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