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Should I stay or should I go?

Should I stay or should I go?

Old Sep 24th 2019, 7:54 am
  #1  
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Default Should I stay or should I go?

I’ve lived in New Zealand for the last twenty years and I’m now contemplating moving back to the UK. I have no family here, they are all in England, my parents are getting up there in years. I’ve just returned from a months visit there thinking I would cross it off the list but it didn’t happen, making the decision no clearer. Things that worry me about the move back are work, buying real estate, traffic, that’s about it really, there are pros and cons on both sides, I just don’t want to make the move and then regret it. Has anyone had experience of moving back and regretting it, it maybe it was the best decision?
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Old Sep 24th 2019, 10:24 am
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Default Re: Should I stay or should I go?

I am in similar place to you, unable to decide and and probably overthinking it too.

I am going back again for another visit in October to hopefully help me come to a final decision.

The fear of regret is a very real one and I dont want to do the ping pong pom thing.
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Old Sep 24th 2019, 12:05 pm
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Default Re: Should I stay or should I go?

Originally Posted by Sharon Margaret View Post
I’ve lived in New Zealand for the last twenty years and I’m now contemplating moving back to the UK. I have no family here, they are all in England, my parents are getting up there in years. I’ve just returned from a months visit there thinking I would cross it off the list but it didn’t happen, making the decision no clearer. Things that worry me about the move back are work, buying real estate, traffic, that’s about it really, there are pros and cons on both sides, I just don’t want to make the move and then regret it. Has anyone had experience of moving back and regretting it, it maybe it was the best decision?
We did similar just after retirement in the USA, going back for a few months to cross returning off the list, but it just increased our longing.

We didn’t have jobs to worry about as we were retired (in our 50’s) but it did mean leaving our grown children in the USA. We decided that they may as well learn to live without us now rather than in 20 to 30 years. (No grandchildren or prospect of grandchildren).

It has worked out really well for us but I don’t envy your decision. Good luck with whatever you decide to you.
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Old Sep 24th 2019, 1:58 pm
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Default Re: Should I stay or should I go?

Originally Posted by Sharon Margaret View Post
I’ve lived in New Zealand for the last twenty years and I’m now contemplating moving back to the UK. I have no family here, they are all in England, my parents are getting up there in years. I’ve just returned from a months visit there thinking I would cross it off the list but it didn’t happen, making the decision no clearer. Things that worry me about the move back are work, buying real estate, traffic, that’s about it really, there are pros and cons on both sides, I just don’t want to make the move and then regret it. Has anyone had experience of moving back and regretting it, it maybe it was the best decision?
Can't comment on experience of moving back. If you look at it this way, some parts of the UK have more work opportunities than some parts of NZ, some parts of the UK offer cheaper housing than some parts of NZ and some parts of the UK have less traffic than NZ. No matter where you end up in the UK, it will still be closer than before. Since I live in Ireland, I won't be too qualified to give advice about the UK . However even for us the UK is just around the corner. These days you can search jobs online, find out what salary you can expect and compare what kind of housing you'll get for your money and then look at traffic:-)
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Old Sep 24th 2019, 8:10 pm
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Default Re: Should I stay or should I go?

Originally Posted by fastrhino View Post
I am in similar place to you, unable to decide and and probably overthinking it too.

I am going back again for another visit in October to hopefully help me come to a final decision.

The fear of regret is a very real one and I dont want to do the ping pong pom thing.
Yes, that overthinking thing, I seriously thought going back would cross England off the list, but if anything it made me want to go back there more. I realise that having a holiday there, or anywhere is always much nicer than actual day to day living there. Maybe we as humans have become too wrapped up in making a living and comforts in life, if we put that aside and look for what really makes us happy we would have our answer. We probably need to make a list of pros and cons. Good luck with your decision making, let me know how you get on 😊
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Old Sep 24th 2019, 8:15 pm
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Default Re: Should I stay or should I go?

Originally Posted by durham_lad View Post

We did similar just after retirement in the USA, going back for a few months to cross returning off the list, but it just increased our longing.

We didn’t have jobs to worry about as we were retired (in our 50’s) but it did mean leaving our grown children in the USA. We decided that they may as well learn to live without us now rather than in 20 to 30 years. (No grandchildren or prospect of grandchildren).

It has worked out really well for us but I don’t envy your decision. Good luck with whatever you decide to you.
Thank you for your reply, it sounds like you are happy with the decisions you have made, big move, but it has obviously worked out well for you.
All the best!
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