tuppins

OK, looks like its all going ahead.
Been here 11months, not stopped thinking about the UK in all that time. Hated Oz when first arrived but have come to like it here, but still didn't want to stay. I have had a couple of jobs that i enjoyed whilst being here which has been good as i had been off work for a while with the kids before we arrived. The kids are in a lovely nursery and enjoy the beaches and we had made quite a few friends.....but still i wanted to leave. I have just felt that we have no security here, all 'casual' jobs and high cost of living.

Anyway, flights booked for 3wks time.............. Now i'm not sure. PLEASE can someone put my mind at rest, is this normal? Is it just because we have the flights paid for, both cars sold and packing our boxes, it's all so final.

I feel bad for the kids because i can see that this is a good place to bring them up BUT before the tickets were booked i felt bad for them missing out on all their family
It's all so confusing, can someone shed some light, should i be cancelling my tickets or will i feel better when i am home?

Unsure

If you're not sure I'd stay and give it another six months. We were like you and a couple of weeks before leaving we started to get cold feet, a couple of days before we were like 'nooooh don't want to go home' but we were 'persuaded to' and we regret it big time. However, we've been back for 10 months now and have struggled with finding well paid permanent work and we're sort of in a limbo land at the moment pining for Australia - had we arrived and found work immediately that meant we could survive we may have felt differently.

If you have plenty of money and can 'ping' back then it's not so bad but we're not sure whether we'll be able to go back again.

It's so hard and I do think once you've done it, it sort of messes with your head a bit - we want to live in Australia and the UK but obviously we can't!

One of the reasons we wanted to come back was because we were panicking about the education here and my daughter getting behind, we didn't want to leave it too long as we were worried about her. The other thing was cost of living but after we booked the flights my husband got offered promotion in the same company with a big pay rise, now in the UK he's struggling to get ANY job!

Don't envy you but I think it's wise if unsure to just stop and think and not make any rash decisions.

Good lucky with your choice.
x

quoll

Time for that crystal ball again huh.

Who knows? But you probably had second thoughts before you came here too - fear of the unknown is perfectly normal. I think you know one way or the other whether you belong in a place and if it was going to be the place you want to grow old and die in you would know it because it would feel right and you wouldnt have been agonizing over what you had left behind. If you dont feel like you belong then go home and dont prolong the agony. Then look at your life and put effort into making it as good as it can be. Your kids wont suffer - there are millions of kids growing up to be happy, healthy functional human beings in UK, they arent disadvantaged in any way as long as they have HAPPY parents looking to their best interests and making sure they have a good life.

I think the big crunch point is the jobs situation - if you go back to unemployment then you are probably more likely to pingpong - also if one of you is less than 100% about returning and thrusts every little niggle down the other's throat ("this wouldnt have happened if we had stayed in Australia" blah blah blah).

Good luck with it! Whichever way you jump!

alipally

If you can afford to hedge your bets then it might be prudent to do so.
The cars are already sold and the flights are already booked... I'm not sure if you'd get a refund if you cancelled now.

Your packing on the other hand can be stored in Australia.

If it's feasible, maybe you could take the flights and make a decision as to what you really want once you've seen England again, it may well become clear that you need to stay and you can have your packing sent then. If you decide that it was a BIG mistake, then you can book a ticket back to Oz, a return flight London to Melbourne can be had in the UK for less than £400 at the moment, so it might make this a little more affordable.

I know that this pinging and ponging is an expensive exercise, the distance necessitates the cost. So think really hard before you make a decision because, once enacted, you and your family have to live with the consequences.

dewdrop

Its hard to know what the RIGHT decision is...

My parents immigrated to Canada and never looked back...been here 30yrs now...and for me. I'm the one with itchy feet...so we are heading back in aug to the UK...I'm doing the same thing..wondering IF WE are doing the right thing for the children...MUM is moving back at a later date..so we'll all be together again..so that isn't the worry. Just the FEAR of the unknown!

I'd say give it at least 2yrs....you're still going thru the adjustment phase. and its taken you such a long process to get where you are now...Try to enjoy it for what it is...as you must have like it or you wouldn't have moved there.

I hope we enjoy England, don't get TOO homesick for ONTARIO CANADA, but, NOT in the winter(won't miss that)

good luck to you and yours.

tuppins

Thanks for the replys
OH and i are both having 2nd thoughts. We did think that we may use our return flights but we have n work to come back to.
We have felt homesick all of the last 11months and ONLY now see aus in an attractive light! I am just worried that we will change our plans and then it will turn out to be last minute jitters, as one of you said - we had exactly the same before coming out here
will keep you all updated