Returning to the UK with someone with dementia
 

We need some advice. Mum has advanced dementia (aggressive, agitated etc) and we have found the French health service keep fobbing us off with we have to return to the UK.

Where do we start? Is there any practical help we can have with the move? We don't know where to move to and have limited savings.

Also is it better to sell the house for 100K and make a huge loss or go back to the UK with less than 30K in savings? I know in the UK there is a threshold where you have to pay for care but what can we claim. I believe we cannot get carers allowance for 24 weeks?

Re: Returning to the UK with someone with dementia
 

First of all, you should contact the Alzheimer's Society. You will get the best advice from them.

I don't know of any help available for getting your mother back to the UK, but if there is any, the Alzheimer Society will know about it.

The care your mum needs when you've got her back to the UK will come from both the NHS (health care) and the local authority (social care).

She will be entitled to NHS care from the first day she is resident in the UK. If she has advanced dementia, you will need to get her assessed by a doctor asap.

Social care is currently in crisis due to austerity measures. If you think you are being fobbed off by the French health service, be prepared for a similar experience in the UK.

The standard of help offered does vary from area to area. It might be worth asking the Alzheimer's Society or Age UK whether they'd recommend one area over another. You may actually do better in Scotland or Wales rather than England.

You are not personally liable for your mother's social care costs, but she will be subject to a means test, which makes it relevant whether she is part-owner of the house in France.

The benefits entitlement for yourselves and your mother is complicated. You should get advice from either Alzheimer's Society or Age UK. Age UK have a leaflet on returning from abroad here which should answer many of your questions.

Re: Returning to the UK with someone with dementia
 

Where did you live before you moved to France?

That would be a start as you are have some knowledge of that area. Doubt whether anyone of the forum can give you strong advice as to where to move to; it all depends on what you can afford in accommodation etc. Broadly speaking SE England is very expensive while northern areas and Wales are cheaper.

No matter where you move to you first need to find accommodation for yourselves and then get your mother assessed for social services. This first step you are going to have to finance yourselves.

Re: Returning to the UK with someone with dementia
 

The Alzheimer's Society has a forum here.. I've found a couple of threads from people in a similar position to yourself with a demented parent in France or Spain. I've found the forum very helpful for discussing the challenge of caring for my mother. I think you'd benefit from it.

Re: Returning to the UK with someone with dementia
 

Hi and welcome to BE DayPerson.

I am sorry to read about your Mum. My MIL passed away earlier this year after two decades with altzheimers. She was the same. Aggravated and agitated . Difficult and stubborn . Sometimes violent. It is very tough indeed for my husband to see his Mum disappear in that way.

That's a very supportive and helpful site Editha.

Thanks for sharing on here.

Re: Returning to the UK with someone with dementia
 

We used to live in Essex but we don't think we can afford to move back there as we have limited money.

Thanks for the links Editha, I hadn't thought of Age UK.

Re: Returning to the UK with someone with dementia
 

Looking at some of your other posts, I do wonder whether bringing your mother back to the UK is the best thing to do. Even if you feel you are not getting enough support in France, it isn't going to be much better in the UK. Plus you'll have the challenge of getting your mother back to the UK, and getting her settled. People with dementia find it difficult to get used to new surroundings. If you are going to be renting, then you'll have to find a landlord prepared to accept a demented tenant, and your home won't be adapted for your mother's needs. Over all, I wonder if staying put wouldn't be the best idea.

Re: Returning to the UK with someone with dementia
 

My mother-in-law had dementia. My wife and I were her carers. Difficult. In the UK you will get help from Age Concern and other NGOs. GHelp from SWD will depend on what area you are in.


Housing is available from Housing Associations here in the are wher I live (Argyll and Bute0 but work is hard to find. I really do not know aht to suggest.