British Expats

British Expats (https://britishexpats.com/forum/)
-   Moving back or to the UK (https://britishexpats.com/forum/moving-back-uk-61/)
-   -   Over 40's Moving Back and Catching Up (https://britishexpats.com/forum/moving-back-uk-61/over-40s-moving-back-catching-up-701116/)

Bud the Wiser Dec 7th 2012 3:38 am

Re: OVER 50's & 60's Chit-Chat & Daily Catch-Up Thread
 

Originally Posted by dunroving (Post 10419728)
Must say this is a somewhat tacky side of Brits on holiday that I've seen over the years. I remember when unlimited alcohol was free on transatlantic flights. I would dread being sat next to a Brit under 50 because they would not only drink the whole way but constantly interrogate me as to why I didn't want any free booze (as if this were some sign of weakness).

I remember one guy drank so much the flight attendants wouldn't give him any more, so he tried to get me to ask for some booze for him. No chance. He wasn't pleased a bit. I've never quite understood the lack of self-control some people have when there's free food or booze involved.

The number of times I've had to stop my mother putting bread rolls in her handbag at the breakfast table in a restaurant. Alcohol apart, I wonder if it's a generational thing or just a lack of social etiquette. I don't mean that in a derogatory way, because I could understand it if people had lived through the experience of war and rationing.

I remember my accountant in the UK, an Egyptian and a very wealthy man being totally embarassed by his younger brother, who was visiting from Egypt, arriving at his doorstep with a dozen toilet rolls he'd taken from the train because "They were free."

Celticspirit Dec 7th 2012 3:57 am

Re: OVER 50's & 60's Chit-Chat & Daily Catch-Up Thread
 

Originally Posted by Bud the Wiser (Post 10420524)
The number of times I've had to stop my mother putting bread rolls in her handbag at the breakfast table in a restaurant. Alcohol apart, I wonder if it's a generational thing or just a lack of social etiquette. I don't mean that in a derogatory way, because I could understand it if people had lived through the experience of war and rationing.

I remember my accountant in the UK, an Egyptian and a very wealthy man being totally embarassed by his younger brother, who was visiting from Egypt, arriving at his doorstep with a dozen toilet rolls he'd taken from the train because "They were free."

It's quite crazy and we all pay for it. Last year in NYC for my annual visit to show/judge during Westminster week at Madison Square Garden, I went to Macy's annual sale. This is the original and enormous store. Wait a minute, so many Brit accents?? Got into a conversation with a mum and daughter. They come on junkets for the brilliant sales and exchange rates. She said (with pride) every year they take all the towels and ash trays they can pilfer at their hotel.
Sad........

between two worlds Dec 7th 2012 7:23 am

Re: OVER 50's & 60's Chit-Chat & Daily Catch-Up Thread
 

Originally Posted by perthhomeschool (Post 10419380)
Thanks Tina! What a lovely welcome! Yes, your grown children can surprise you. Mine said, Mom the last 20 years has been all about me. It should be all about you now...:cry_smile::wub:

I have no doubt in my mind that I will be completely shell shocked when I get there, since I haven't been since 1989:eek: That's one of the reasons why I think it is actually a good thing that we don't go back to where I came from. Start somewhere new. Like it's a new country (which it just might be). I have lived overseas with my hubby though his job, in Pakistan and Swaziland, so we are used to this sort of thing. We'll treat it as another adventure!

Already started decluttering and had the first of two major yard sales. First gets us set up to sell the house and move into an apartment. We have a small business in interior foliage to sell too and we don't want to do both at once. Will sell house when DD graduates nursing school as she will be coming back home to do that, and then downsize when she moves out.

We do have a dog but will not be taking her with us. The trip would be too much for her. We will leave her with DD if she decides not to come, or with her second family, dear friends of ours who dogsit for us.

Getting excited about planning our exploratory trip over. Have made copious notes as I read the 1st Over 50's and 60's about what to check out while I am there re rentals, banks, council, etc. Hubby will have a bus pass but I will still be 59. We don't want to have a car so still trying to settle on an appropriate place. Thinking of CANTERBURY. Also (a less expensive option) CARDIFF, but not sure I could handle the constantly rainy weather. Any thoughts on either appreciated.

AAAAh how lovely what your daughter said. Actually my oldest son is now trying to get his British papers, my middle child might like to work in Europe for a while, and the youngest is already here, so you never know, my dream that they all move to Europe might come true!

Anyway I know we can't plan our lives around them. I just don't want to end up unable to see them--or any future grandchildren--hardly at all.

Yes, if you want a drier climate you have to rule out the Southwest--though it's my favourite part of Britain --but there are lots of parts I don't know, I must admit!

You certainly do need that exploratory visit if you haven't been since 1989!!

Tina

sallysimmons Dec 7th 2012 8:36 am

Re: OVER 50's & 60's Chit-Chat & Daily Catch-Up Thread
 

Originally Posted by dunroving (Post 10419728)
I remember one guy drank so much the flight attendants wouldn't give him any more, so he tried to get me to ask for some booze for him. No chance. He wasn't pleased a bit. I've never quite understood the lack of self-control some people have when there's free food or booze involved.

I have a friend who I refuse to go to buffets with because it's just embarrassing. If you can only go once, he piles so much food on to his plate that it looks impossible to sustain, but somehow it gets it back to the table in one piece.

I don't think British businesses are out to screw every penny from their customers. I just think they are operating in a culture where many people take advantage of free stuff because they're bound and determined to never "waste" (aka spend) a penny of their own money if they can avoid it. It's not as bad now as it used to be, but it's still there.

While we're on the subject of stingy Brits, can I just vent about my only real beef since we got back? What in God's name do people have against heating their houses properly? And don't say 'heating is expensive' because the people I'm talking about can afford holidays and nice food so they can certainly afford to heat their houses if they choose to. When I question why they don't have the heat on, they say things like 'well, there's just two of us so it seems a waste' (???!!!) or 'I had it on this morning' (IT'S EVENING NOW!) or 'it's comfortable enough if you put some layers on.' I'M INSIDE! I don't want to wear layers. I want to feel warm and cosy. It's got to the point where I won't stay at any of my friends' houses and will make long drives home after shows and plays just to sleep in a warm bed.

scot47 Dec 7th 2012 8:41 am

Re: OVER 50's & 60's Chit-Chat & Daily Catch-Up Thread
 
The central heating thing puzzles me too. I have a small apartment with a good modern central heating system I use it. When I visit friends and
neighbours their homes are like refrigerators because they refuse to switch it on. "A waste of money" they say

Fish n Chips 56 Dec 7th 2012 9:28 am

Re: OVER 50's & 60's Chit-Chat & Daily Catch-Up Thread
 

Originally Posted by perthhomeschool (Post 10417745)
Thanks to everyone who responded to this johnny-come-lately lol! I so appreciate your welcome. I have posted a couple of times elsewhere and received some great information on where I might live in the UK (since I don't have family outside of London...WAAAAY too expensive), and also about claiming benefits, including US social security. But what I didn't find was the kind of camaraderie and emotional support I have been reading here -as well as just how much fun you were all having...and I wanted in on it :rofl:

Been in the US (Florida) for over 30 years, with a couple of years back in the UK in the late 80's. Married 21 years, one daughter, 20 years. She started the bug in me of wanting to go back when she became enamoured with Dr. Who. This was about a year ago. At that time, she thought she might want to go and live in the UK, and as we talked about it for a bit, and went ahead and applied for her UK passport, I started to like the idea for myself more and more. Of course, now she is not sure if she might want to move there, or stay here, or maybe go to Israel. So we are planning on going without her and letting her take the time to decide. We will take a trip over in about 2 years when she has finished nursing school to look things over.

Funny thing this...it's been about 6 months since this whole things started, and now I think about going back constantly. In fact, whenever I sit down to read the first forum I have to make sure I have a tissue or two nearby :o But in all reality, the number one reason I have for wanting to move back is healthcare security. Especially since my husband is 12 years older than me. He is the picture of health, whereas I am not exactly, but our plan is to move when he is 70 and not a year older.

I have made one British friend here who is also planning on moving back. She owns a British store in town and I love to go over and have a proper English tea with her and a natter. We understand each other like no one else can. She's thinking of up and moving in a year's time, back to Sheffield, although she wants to eventually move to Costa del Sol. I will miss her terribly.

Something really hit me just the other day. I thought I had left the UK behind me, but in reality I had spend the last 30 years or so doing things in the British way, being British in the way I thought about things, watching things British...Keeping up Appearances, Faulty Towers, Inspector Morse, etc...and my daughter had grown up watching these things with me. I never realised that I WAS being British all along. No wonder I felt like I could never quite fit in!

In any case, I now feel I have an identity AT LAST! And I love it! I can't wait to visit and explore. Thankfully, my husband, a world traveler himself, is all for it and excited to get there too. I am hoping my daughter will move with us, but if not, we will always be a plane ride a way...whether we are here in the US or not. And if she does go to Israel, we will be 4 1/2 hours away instead of 12 1/2. Thank you so much for listening! I am honoured to be here and look forward to catching up (eventually :rofl:)

~Monique
PS: Origin of perthhomeschool: I home schooled my daughter and the name came from an absolutely idyllic summer in Perth, Ontario, where I helped an old family friend build her house.

My Number one reason too, its a very serious issue.

J.JsOH Dec 7th 2012 11:13 am

Re: OVER 50's & 60's Chit-Chat & Daily Catch-Up Thread
 

Originally Posted by dunroving (Post 10419728)
Must say this is a somewhat tacky side of Brits on holiday that I've seen over the years. I remember when unlimited alcohol was free on transatlantic flights. I would dread being sat next to a Brit under 50 because they would not only drink the whole way but constantly interrogate me as to why I didn't want any free booze (as if this were some sign of weakness).

I remember one guy drank so much the flight attendants wouldn't give him any more, so he tried to get me to ask for some booze for him. No chance. He wasn't pleased a bit. I've never quite understood the lack of self-control some people have when there's free food or booze involved.

They are still doing it, the boozy Brits on planes that is.

I recently flew Virgin UK to Caribbean. Once it was discovered there was free booze there was a constant line down the aisle to the kitchen area until the booze had all been consumed.

I was surprised the cabin staff allowed the rush instead of handing it out on service rounds.

J.JsOH Dec 7th 2012 11:17 am

Re: OVER 50's & 60's Chit-Chat & Daily Catch-Up Thread
 

Originally Posted by Fish n Chips 56 (Post 10420832)
My Number one reason too, its a very serious issue.

Healthcare security was the number one reason that my DW wanted to move back to UK from US.

J.JsOH Dec 7th 2012 11:20 am

Re: OVER 50's & 60's Chit-Chat & Daily Catch-Up Thread
 

Originally Posted by sallysimmons (Post 10420781)
I have a friend who I refuse to go to buffets with because it's just embarrassing. If you can only go once, he piles so much food on to his plate that it looks impossible to sustain, but somehow it gets it back to the table in one piece.

I don't think British businesses are out to screw every penny from their customers. I just think they are operating in a culture where many people take advantage of free stuff because they're bound and determined to never "waste" (aka spend) a penny of their own money if they can avoid it. It's not as bad now as it used to be, but it's still there.

While we're on the subject of stingy Brits, can I just vent about my only real beef since we got back? What in God's name do people have against heating their houses properly? And don't say 'heating is expensive' because the people I'm talking about can afford holidays and nice food so they can certainly afford to heat their houses if they choose to. When I question why they don't have the heat on, they say things like 'well, there's just two of us so it seems a waste' (???!!!) or 'I had it on this morning' (IT'S EVENING NOW!) or 'it's comfortable enough if you put some layers on.' I'M INSIDE! I don't want to wear layers. I want to feel warm and cosy. It's got to the point where I won't stay at any of my friends' houses and will make long drives home after shows and plays just to sleep in a warm bed.

Weird isn't it how many Brits are not happy unless they are depriving themselves or getting something for free.

Thankfully my time in US society removed that trait that I am now aware I had before I moved out of UK.

Perth Dec 7th 2012 12:27 pm

Re: OVER 50's & 60's Chit-Chat & Daily Catch-Up Thread
 
Quick question: we are thinking of buying IPADs while we are still here and ditching the laptops. Would a US warranty be valid in the UK?

Perth Dec 7th 2012 12:31 pm

Re: OVER 50's & 60's Chit-Chat & Daily Catch-Up Thread
 

Originally Posted by J.JsOH (Post 10420990)
Healthcare security was the number one reason that my DW wanted to move back to UK from US.

So imperative for us. I have nightmares about going medically bankrupt. My husband is older than me but so far very healthy. But I have a couple of chronic conditions. My father's side of the family is doomed with all kinds of medical issues. It's gotten to the point where I don't like to go to the GP anymore in case they find something else:D

dunroving Dec 7th 2012 1:19 pm

Re: OVER 50's & 60's Chit-Chat & Daily Catch-Up Thread
 

Originally Posted by perthhomeschool (Post 10421096)
Quick question: we are thinking of buying IPADs while we are still here and ditching the laptops. Would a US warranty be valid in the UK?

For most computers, the answer is essentially "No". Although I have read some ways around this for some manufacturers, personally I would wait until you get here and buy one, unless you really need one now for some reason..

jasper123 Dec 7th 2012 2:13 pm

Re: OVER 50's & 60's Chit-Chat & Daily Catch-Up Thread
 

Originally Posted by Celticspirit (Post 10420543)
It's quite crazy and we all pay for it. Last year in NYC for my annual visit to show/judge during Westminster week at Madison Square Garden, I went to Macy's annual sale. This is the original and enormous store. Wait a minute, so many Brit accents?? Got into a conversation with a mum and daughter. They come on junkets for the brilliant sales and exchange rates. She said (with pride) every year they take all the towels and ash trays they can pilfer at their hotel.
Sad........

Most of the hotels in Vegas succesfully stopped people from stealing there towels and ash trays and anything else that they should not be taking, by not acepting cash for payment of room ---- only credit or debit cards are allowed, no card, no room, and they will ask for your card up front as you check in, they will then put your card number in there system, and when you check out your card is charged for room and any extras you used like phone calls or room service,

and if you used any bottled water, booze, beer, or food from the fridge, most hotels on the strip supply all these things in your room, but there is a notice and price list for people to read in room, and after you have checked out of your room and gone to the desk they will charge you for your room and any room service you had as you would expect,
and after you have left the hotel ---- then later that day when the maid comes to clean room and change sheets etc, then she has to make a compleat inventory of all towels,pillow cases, sheets, blankets, booze, beer, food, bottled water etc etc, and if ANYTHING has been taken or food/booze used, the customers credit/debit card will be charged accordingly, and the customer wont know untill they check there bank statement when they get home :sneaky:
Las Vegas has been doing this for decades, there preety smart there you know ;) but the thing people dont realize is if they take a nice quality towel from a nice Las Vegas hotel, then they will find a charge of at least $50 for that one towel on there credit card statement,and for an ash tray I dont know, but most Vegas rooms these days are smoke free, it definatly makes people think twice about thieving a towel or anything in the future from any hotels they go to :D
I agree with this approach, if I was the Manager of a nice hotel here in U.K. I would do the same thing to the Brits :thumbsup:

rebs Dec 7th 2012 2:46 pm

Re: OVER 50's & 60's Chit-Chat & Daily Catch-Up Thread
 

Originally Posted by perthhomeschool (Post 10421096)
Quick question: we are thinking of buying IPADs while we are still here and ditching the laptops. Would a US warranty be valid in the UK?

If you are not planning to move for another 4 years and you get the ipad now, there won't be much, if any, of the warranty period to worry about.

Perth Dec 7th 2012 5:27 pm

Re: OVER 50's & 60's Chit-Chat & Daily Catch-Up Thread
 

Originally Posted by between two worlds (Post 10420712)
AAAAh how lovely what your daughter said. Actually my oldest son is now trying to get his British papers, my middle child might like to work in Europe for a while, and the youngest is already here, so you never know, my dream that they all move to Europe might come true!

Anyway I know we can't plan our lives around them. I just don't want to end up unable to see them--or any future grandchildren--hardly at all.

Yes, if you want a drier climate you have to rule out the Southwest--though it's my favourite part of Britain --but there are lots of parts I don't know, I must admit!

You certainly do need that exploratory visit if you haven't been since 1989!!

Tina

Tina, my daughter let us know that she is a traveler and a wanderer at heart, so that we should not make any plans around her since she plans on being as mobile as she can for as long as she can. I don't foresee us living in the same state for any period of time if we were to remain, so, like I said, we would likely be a plane ride away anyway. I do hope it works out for you and your kids.

We are now looking at NORFOLK, possibly NORWICH. It's frustrating trying to pick somewhere completely new:blink: I think JJ s are in Norwich??? If you read this, could you answer a few questions? 1) Liveable without a car? 2) High Street with shops, GP, Bank, Post Office, etc by foot or by bus? 3) Good rail system to London? 4) Generally safe, friendly place? 5) Doesn't rain incessantly?:rofl:


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