gedge

it's not long now before we return

homesickness, the usual culprit plus pressure from my wife's family
i can't deny the need for more support with our two little kids

so we pack up, say our goodbyes and prepare to leave

the trouble is i keep having this reoccurring dream
we arrive at the inlaws, everyone is happy and joyfull welcoming us back "home"
bit by bit my life disappears inside that house... cases, wife, kids...
i can't follow, i can't move

is this where i turn and walk away? my future seems so uncertain
is this how the dream was always going to end?

northernbird

Oh dear C, I don't know what to say. Thinking of you, keep us all up to date won't you. Carole xx

Issie

Before i came to Australia i had the most terrible dreams/thoughts and deja vu's.....I thought it would never end, and as soon as i got on that plane it all got clearer. I am sure for you it will be the same on your onward trip home. Its just right now your feeling uncertain about your future as we have done at one stage.

You will be right....you just need time to make you see it.

Take care my friend.

Onwards and upwards and don't look back

pommybird

I don't know you're story but our return to the UK nearly split me and the OH up - but we came through it and I hope you do too.

Don't look at it as the 'dream ending' - just look at it as the 'next chapter.'

Life has a funny way of making decisions for us - as some wise person once said 'life is what happens when you're making other plans.'

Machiavelli

Hi C,

So sorry to read this.

Please don't think of walking away from your family. Having two young children with no family support around has obviously been too much for you and your wife, but once you get back to where you have family support I'm sure that things will get easier for you. As Pommybird said, don't look on it as your dream ending, it is just the latest chapter in your life.

Try not to see your inlaws as a threat. I'm sure that all they will want is for their daughter's and your happiness, and to be able to help out with their grandchildren.

I hope that things work out for all of you,

M

quoll

It doesnt take long for a dream to become a nightmare! It sounds as if your heart is not in this move but that you are bending to a whole lot of other pressures. Sadly, in any compromise, someone always endus up paying a higher price than someone else. As others have said - look upon this as the next step in your life adventure, dont write it off as being the final step!

All the best with it!

Nu-Shooz

Quite normal to feel and dream this way i think. It is the reverse when emigrating too.
I think given time, once you have settled you will be fine. I often read posts where people go back simply because their parents want them to, then once back get upset because they don't get 24/7 attention from them. I hope this isn't the case for your wife. Go back for yourselves aswell as for family, but don't live for the inlaws, do it for you!

soapy©

Listen pal, you never did want to go back. but you know you have to. if you can just get your head round it and try to make it work for as long as you can. you never know, by that time even jools might be fed up with the UK

even if you stay in the uk i know you will make it work, because you always put them first.
good luck and remember im always here to listen pal

TraceyW

Gedge, someone has already said it.....this is just the next chapter of your lives, it's not the end. It's a new start, somewhere else that's all.

We all feel like this somedays, well, I know I do. I've often thought legging it with the Cirque Du Soliel would be bloody marvelous! I think parenthood brings about a crisis on a more regular basis.

All the best

St.Georges Girl

Oh crikey C, you sound so despondent. Having recurring dreams when something major is about to happen or is happening in your life is very common. Just do yourself a favour and get a home of your own asap. The sooner you do, the sooner you and your wife and children will be able to start the next episode of your lives together. I don't look on going 'home' as going 'back', I look on it as moving on with the rest of my life. If for whatever reason it doesn't work out in the UK, you can always return to Oz when the children are abit older, many people come here with teenage children and make it work. It isn't the end by any means, it's the start of something new.

I wish you all the luck in the world C and really hope you can settle down quickly and happily. It's a lovely time to be heading for the UK, all the buds in bloom, hanging baskets and pots to start preparing and summer on it's way. Lovely.

You take care and please keep in touch C. Best of luck mate.x

chicagojlo

Definitely sounds like you are doing what everyone else wants and making yourself miserable in the process. My husband has learned the hard way what deciding to keep quiet about what you want because you think it makes others happy does.

Jerseygirl

Hello.

I'm so sad reading your post. Your bound to be in turmoil about returning to the UK...especially if it's not really what you want to do. I take it you're going back because your wife is homesick. I admire you for that...you obviously love her very much and you're putting your wife's happiness first.

Just make sure you're not returning because folks back in the UK want you to.

Clippy

Oh Chris, this makes me so sad

The stress of moving back is taking it's toll. It's bound to.

None of us can predict the future, none of us know where our lives will take us.

Soapy has said it pretty much spot on.

I wish I could offer you some wise words, but words fail me. I'm thinking of you though.

Kx

Margaret3

its normal to have crazy dreams when your under lots of stress,

trouble is they'll be more stress when you go back. But remember its your wife and kids that are more important than a country, and their worth fighting for .

When do you go back gedge.??

Streaks

don't know what to say mate, keep strong xx