TraceyW

Well, it's me, back in good old Blighty at long last! Now, this may be a long one, so if you're easily bored by inane drivvel, sign off now! If not, grab a cuppa and settle in for what could be a long one.....

For those of you that don't know me or my Australian story, hubby, two small kiddies and myself moved over to Perth in July 2004. The reason we did this was because a) it was hubby's dream as he'd backpacked many years ago and fallen in love with the place, and b) I'd watched Shirley Valentine wayyyyy too many times and I was a stuck at home housewife going slightly mental with talking to the walls "Christ Trace, you're only 38, get out and live a bit". So, off to Oz we went.

I think I knew, deep down in my heart, within the first few weeks of landing that I didn't connect with the place at all. I tried over the years to feel at home, to make a life for us all over there, but it was as if I'd left my heart back in England. I missed my family so much, and e-mails and phone calls just didn't cut it and certainly didn't compensate for a hug off my Mum or seeing the kids spend that precious time with their ageing grandparents. I'd always wondered, prior to emigrating, how we'd deal with family illness whilst we were so many miles away, and I was to find out in July 2005 when my beloved Dad passed away due to brain cancer. Nothing, and I mean nothing, can prepare you for the range of emotions and shear feeling of helplessness that overwhelm you at a time like that. And, no amount of sunshine or beautiful beaches and living space can fill the void.

I returned from the UK, having sorted out funeral arrangements etc and threw myself back into life in Oz. I am very proud to say I am now the owner of a Bachelor of Education degree thanks to Australia, that's one thing I will always be very grateful for. I made some very good friends there, and also lost a few not so good friends too . I realised just how materialistic some people can be and just how unmaterialistic I was. None of that glitz and shiny stuff impressed me, it has no soul, no character and did not make me willing to replace my family back in the UK with it.

Now, my husband on the other hand, loved his life in Oz, as did our two children. They were all very settled in their lives which obviously added to my utter desperation as I not only had to deal with the gut wrenching feelings of homesickness, I also had to deal with awful feelings of guilt at wanting to move my very happy family back to the UK. I battled with this for years, I even considered moving to another state in Oz wondering whether it was just Perth I disliked. I toddled off on rekkies to Melbourne, Sydney and the Gold Coast, lovely times were had, but I still didn't want to live in any of them.

By the end of 2007 I just couldn't do it anymore. My wonderful husband agreed to move back to the UK He said he couldn't see me sad anymore.

So, here we are. Living in South Devon, in a house that needs a serious amount of TLC but boasts the most amazing views of Dartmoor to compensate it's interior ugliness!

We have only been home for a few weeks and boy, it's been a rollercoaster ride. I assumed, stupidly, I would get off the plane and kiss the ground Pope style I would be so relieved to be home. Not! I can honestly say, in those first few days, if someone had offered me a plane ticket back to Oz I would've grabbed at the chance. I was completely overwhelmed with feelings of "WTF have I done?" it was all too much to take in. However, a few weeks in and things are starting to settle down. The kids are into school now and doing ok. Hubby has started his training course and loving every minute of it. I cannot work until I have my UK police records check. Oh, that reminds me to tell you, the red tape over here is just as silly as in Oz and getting anything done...like the phone connected or the internet put on....takes FOREVER! I'm sat on my Mums computer typing this as we're still not connected at home!

Being around family again, and having that choice of whether to see them or not is priceless. The kids just keep hugging the grandparents and are constantly asking when they will see them again. It's as if they're frightened they will go away again, like they always did in Oz.

The walks we've done through woodlands and riversides have taken our breaths away, literally! The beauty of this place cannot be matched I don't think. We are looking at the UK through new eyes, with a greater appreciation of the things this country does well. People have asked me why I came back. I refuse to go into a longwinded explanation with them as they wouldn't understand unless they'd lived my Australian life. So I just say "Family" and they seem to let it go and understand.

It is early days for us here, but I can honestly say now those first few crazy days are behind us, hand on heart, if I could turn the clocks back and go back to Aus would I go? No. I no longer wake up with that ache in my stomach of being in a country where I never felt that I belonged. Now I'm home and this is where I do belong. This is my country and I'm very very proud to say that.

For those of you wondering what to do, stay or go, follow your heart. It's usually the right choice.

Danny B

I'm so happy to hear that you all arrived back safe and sound.

Thanks for the update and good luck for the future.

Bevm

Thanks for reporting in, Tracey! Sounds great.

I'm sure there are all sorts of hassles, but we've found that everytime we've moved. Phone, post office, internet, driving licences, doctors, dentists etc etc etc. You can't stay in one place because of that, I say.

Where in South Devon. We'll be looking on the coast there because it is one of the world's beautiful places.

Bev

quoll

Great report Tracey! Good to hear that you got over that initial OMG hump and things are now going well for you - long may they do so!!! I am all envy of your home with a view of Dartmoor - what a brooding but glorious view that may be depending on the day!

All the best!

SarahInTX

Welcome home Tracey! You'll settle in quicker than you know! I've been back 2 months, and feel as if I never left.

Sarah

Marmalade

Tracey, what a wonderful post. Welcome Home

Tr1boy

Nice one Tracey, glad to hear all is working out for you

happy4

The beauty of this place cannot be matched I don't think. We are looking at the UK through new eyes, with a greater appreciation of the things this
It is early days for us here, but I can honestly say now those first few crazy days are behind us, hand on heart, if I could turn the clocks back and go back to Aus would I go? No. I no longer wake up with that ache in my stomach of being in a country where I never felt that I belonged. Now I'm home and this is where I do belong.

Tracey, welcome home, these bits you have wrote really stood out for me. I wouldn't swap how I feel now compared to a few months ago for nothing. That dull ache every day, followed by panic of getting stuck there in Oz. We, thats me and my two children have been home nearly six months now after nearly 2 years in Oz and I have my life and self respect back. I really look back and think what on earth was all that about? But when you are there it is so very hard to decide to come home, I am so very glad for you that your OH realised how very unhappy you were and came home with you. I'm afraid mine didn't and still remains in Sydney.

We are good here and have some great support. My son has started School and only last week was awarded by his Headmaster for showing kindness and for his reading in Assembly and my daughter is thriving. I am now doing an A level in Law too. We have come a long way together, I am very proud of their strength and love.

I wish you all lots of happiness ahead, axx

TaraC

So glad you're feeling good about being home - and that it's worked out for your family as well. I've been back over a year now - and with the exception of not having my OH over here - it's been brilliant. You've come back at a great time; the autumn is beautiful here (I love seeing deer and pheasants in the fields on my train ride into work; nothing quite like it).

I hope it continues to be everything you wanted.

Tara

Elaine B.

Great to read your update Tracey, good luck for the future

Fleaflyfloflum

Great to hear from you Tracey.

Thankfully I didnt get the shock factor on arrival.

Glad you are settling in. There is nothing like that warm fuzzy cozy feeling of being home where you belong.

Get stuck into that new house of yours! What time does B&Q open? lol

northernbird

Good to hear your update Tracey. May your happiness continue.

ann m

Good update - congratulations - and continued best wishes to all of you

rabsody

Tracey, brilliant to hear from you! Sounds like things are going pretty well, you're bound to have some ups and downs along the way. Keep us posted .... xxx

cally49

Fantastic Tracey cant wait to see some photos of the view from your place......

As someone said you have gone back at a great time imagine bonfire night and Xmas ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh im so jealous but im also really pleased for you and your family and what a wonderful hubby you have for his consideration of how unhappy you were in Aus.how is it they say in the UK you must be made up lol....

Look forward to your updates the bit about your children and their grandparents bought a tear to my eye as thats the exact reason im still here in NZ...........
All the best
Cally