Going home for indefinite period
Jun 14th 2009, 9:49 pm
#16
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Jun 2009
Location: Finally back home in Scotland
Posts: 1,031
Re: Going home for indefinite period
I thought until I read this thread that I was the only one who has never felt that I belonged. I have been here for more years than I care to tell you and have 4 children and 8 grandchildren and the ninth on the way.
I have been told by many people that I should be glad that I live in such a wonderful country, and yes for many people I am sure it is, but sadly for myself it has never been "home". What home means is the ability to walk down the street and seeing people who not only know you but remember you when you were a kid or knew your mom and dad. To feel the full weight of the history and the heritage of the land that you walk on and to know that somewhere and at sometime members of your family fought and died to give you the freedom that you enjoy.
My husband is Canadian and I am so lucky that he is behind our decision to move back to Scotland in the next few months. My children, grandchildren can't wait to visit us and walk the fields and streets that I have always told them stories about. Don't get me wrong, all of my family is now Canadian by birth and that alone will cause me to have strong ties to this land and I will be moving back knowing that things have changed and that it is not the same as my childhood "hame". But, after everything is said and done it is "hame" has and always will be. Good luck to you Ruby and to everyone else who decides to make the journey back to the land of our birth wherever it may be
I have been told by many people that I should be glad that I live in such a wonderful country, and yes for many people I am sure it is, but sadly for myself it has never been "home". What home means is the ability to walk down the street and seeing people who not only know you but remember you when you were a kid or knew your mom and dad. To feel the full weight of the history and the heritage of the land that you walk on and to know that somewhere and at sometime members of your family fought and died to give you the freedom that you enjoy.
My husband is Canadian and I am so lucky that he is behind our decision to move back to Scotland in the next few months. My children, grandchildren can't wait to visit us and walk the fields and streets that I have always told them stories about. Don't get me wrong, all of my family is now Canadian by birth and that alone will cause me to have strong ties to this land and I will be moving back knowing that things have changed and that it is not the same as my childhood "hame". But, after everything is said and done it is "hame" has and always will be. Good luck to you Ruby and to everyone else who decides to make the journey back to the land of our birth wherever it may be
Jun 15th 2009, 5:39 am
#17
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Joined: Oct 2006
Location: BC
Posts: 1,361
Re: Going home for indefinite period
Hey Ruby,you courageous woman
Wishing you happiness
and all the best to your new life back home.Let go of the torments so that there are rooms for happiness,peace and many good things to grow inside
you. Have a great trip home.
Yoong
Wishing you happinessand all the best to your new life back home.Let go of the torments so that there are rooms for happiness,peace and many good things to grow inside
you. Have a great trip home.
Yoong
Jun 15th 2009, 12:05 pm
#18
Sloopy Frickenbutt
Joined: May 2006
Location: Its good ere Honest........
Posts: 5,225
Re: Going home for indefinite period
and i totally agree....
Jun 15th 2009, 12:37 pm
#19
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Joined: Sep 2007
Location: Southwestern Illinois, USA
Posts: 1,902
Re: Going home for indefinite period
Hi Ruby,
I have followed your story for quite sometime, and think you are indeed a strong woman for taking that step to do 'something' to see what happens. You can't figure anything out until you experience what it is you feel you are missing. Good luck with everything, and I just know that in the end, what you need to do will become clearer and clearer to you, in time. I know it isn't easy, but you have already started the process of doing what needs to be done. I wish you only happiness!
Good luck
I have followed your story for quite sometime, and think you are indeed a strong woman for taking that step to do 'something' to see what happens. You can't figure anything out until you experience what it is you feel you are missing. Good luck with everything, and I just know that in the end, what you need to do will become clearer and clearer to you, in time. I know it isn't easy, but you have already started the process of doing what needs to be done. I wish you only happiness!
Good luck
Jun 15th 2009, 1:15 pm
#20
BE Enthusiast
Joined: Oct 2004
Location: Southern Ontario(house is SOLD on our way back to UK/aug 09)
Posts: 426
Re: Going home for indefinite period
Hi Ruby,
I have followed your story for quite sometime, and think you are indeed a strong woman for taking that step to do 'something' to see what happens. You can't figure anything out until you experience what it is you feel you are missing. Good luck with everything, and I just know that in the end, what you need to do will become clearer and clearer to you, in time. I know it isn't easy, but you have already started the process of doing what needs to be done. I wish you only happiness!
Good luck
I have followed your story for quite sometime, and think you are indeed a strong woman for taking that step to do 'something' to see what happens. You can't figure anything out until you experience what it is you feel you are missing. Good luck with everything, and I just know that in the end, what you need to do will become clearer and clearer to you, in time. I know it isn't easy, but you have already started the process of doing what needs to be done. I wish you only happiness!
Good luck
Jun 15th 2009, 7:34 pm
#21
Joined: Feb 2009
Posts: 821
Re: Going home for indefinite period
Don't come in this side often, but saw your post on Mrs M thread and had to "well done"
Not everyone has the courage that you have to make that trip back to see if you can make it home or if canada was for you
I really hope you find what you are searching for and keep us updated, like gaynor said on the other post its like everyone is heading back
Looks like a big glass for me and few others in the coulees this summer
There is another expat heading back that date, ill PM you
LB
Not everyone has the courage that you have to make that trip back to see if you can make it home or if canada was for you
I really hope you find what you are searching for and keep us updated, like gaynor said on the other post its like everyone is heading back
Looks like a big glass for me and few others in the coulees this summer
There is another expat heading back that date, ill PM you
LB
Jun 17th 2009, 10:40 am
#22
Seasoned Maritimer
Joined: Jun 2005
Location: Fredericton, New Brunswick CA
Posts: 8,309
Re: Going home for indefinite period
Best of luck Rubes.
Jun 17th 2009, 1:25 pm
#23
BE Forum Addict
Joined: Sep 2007
Location: NI (back from Toronto)
Posts: 3,409
Re: Going home for indefinite period
Wishing you lots and lots of good luck and Happiness Ruby
Jun 18th 2009, 5:23 am
#24
BE Forum Addict
Joined: May 2007
Location: England
Posts: 4,212
Re: Going home for indefinite period
I haven't been on here for absolutely ages 'cos I've been trying to work on my head and heart as to where they think I should be!! Anyway, after suffering 18 months of horrible depression and making everyone's life miserable with my moping, I've decided to go home with my daughter. My OH and son intend to stay on here in Canada and keep the house going and I will move in with my parents until I can sort myself out and perhaps look for a place to rent. It's a very apprehensive time for me right now because I'm going through all the usual doubts and inner conflict if I'm doing the right thing, but I've had so much feedback from lots of friends and family that this is the only way I'm going to get my feelings out of my system. I will see for myself if being back home is the right decision or wrong one. So, I leave Calgary on 21st June....Manchester, here I come!!
take care and don't be to hard on yourself......
xxxx
Jun 18th 2009, 11:33 pm
#25
Forum Regular
Joined: Mar 2009
Location: Swindon, Wiltshire
Posts: 54
Re: Going home for indefinite period
Good Luck Ruby, I totally agree that it is always better to do something, you will know yourself as soon as you arrive whether you have done the right thing. I like Merseygirl have been in Australia way longer than I should, but we all have our own journeys, I call it "limbo land" as it is not really living, but it is comfortable and easy most of the time, but empty.
We are all behind you and will follow your story with interest - Hugs
We are all behind you and will follow your story with interest - Hugs
Jun 19th 2009, 1:06 pm
#26
Forum Regular
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 45
Re: Going home for indefinite period
Hi Ruby, let us know how it all goes.
I'm in a similar position, if I leave soon, I leave with my 16 year old daughter but leave behind (for now) my husband and my 18 year old son.
Not an easy decision to make, I haven't made it yet, so I'll be watching for your progress!
Wishing you all the luck in the world.
I'm in a similar position, if I leave soon, I leave with my 16 year old daughter but leave behind (for now) my husband and my 18 year old son.
Not an easy decision to make, I haven't made it yet, so I'll be watching for your progress!
Wishing you all the luck in the world.
Jun 19th 2009, 2:17 pm
#27
Joined: Feb 2006
Location: Red Deer, Alberta
Posts: 10,612
Re: Going home for indefinite period
Hey Rubes, just wanted to say good luck and remember what I said yesterday - get yourself sorted out, take a step back and don't worry about what's going on over here whilst your there. I really hope you find what it is you want and what you need to get yourself on some sort of even kilter. I know it's scary - any big step is! Enjoy all the curries Take care my friend - there be an email waiting for when you get to a computer that end!
Take care my friend - there be an email waiting for when you get to a computer that end!
Jun 19th 2009, 5:07 pm
#28
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Thread Starter
Joined: May 2006
Location: M'cr-Red Deer-M'cr-??
Posts: 1,309
Re: Going home for indefinite period
Hey Rubes, just wanted to say good luck and remember what I said yesterday - get yourself sorted out, take a step back and don't worry about what's going on over here whilst your there. I really hope you find what it is you want and what you need to get yourself on some sort of even kilter. I know it's scary - any big step is! Enjoy all the curries Take care my friend - there be an email waiting for when you get to a computer that end!
Take care my friend - there be an email waiting for when you get to a computer that end!
Aww Piff, I was so sad after you left yesterday....but you gave me much to ponder and I know that should I come back here, I've got a bloody good friend in you! Gonna miss you for a while....Big hugs xxxx
Jun 19th 2009, 5:29 pm
#29
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Thread Starter
Joined: May 2006
Location: M'cr-Red Deer-M'cr-??
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Re: Going home for indefinite period
I just wanted to say a big Thank You to everyone who has offered their best wishes, thoughts and similar experiences....I really appreciate them For those of you who are in a similar situation to myself...I share your pain and conflict...it's not easy is it? I'm only doing this because my flights were mega cheap ($500 one way for me and my 11 year old)....if there was no "Bargain June" flights on offer, I think I'd still be here, spending the summer still churning over my thoughts and wishes of being back home! It's a big step for anyone to consider to walk away from one half of your family in order to do some soul searching...and until I'm back over there, I can't really comment either way on whether it's a good or a bad decision.
So, I've got 2 days to go......still not properly packed because I only have a poxy 20kgs limit and my summer stuff is that alone! Relations at home are neutral, if not more upbeat now as my OH and son are convinced I'll be back by September....apparently, my daughter appears to have changed her mind about wanting to actually LIVE in the UK...she only wants to go back for a long vacation, spend time with family and do all the fun stuff she's wanted to do, but then she wants to come back to all her friends here and the school she has criticized so often
Don't get me wrong, I know my daughter inside and out and she is very prone to changing her mind from one minute to the next, so I'm just taking these comments in my stride and waiting to see how she goes when back home.
Anyway, I'm off to get more packing done....will check in on Sunday morning with my "toodle-ooooo"
Rubes x
For those of you who are in a similar situation to myself...I share your pain and conflict...it's not easy is it? I'm only doing this because my flights were mega cheap ($500 one way for me and my 11 year old)....if there was no "Bargain June" flights on offer, I think I'd still be here, spending the summer still churning over my thoughts and wishes of being back home! It's a big step for anyone to consider to walk away from one half of your family in order to do some soul searching...and until I'm back over there, I can't really comment either way on whether it's a good or a bad decision.So, I've got 2 days to go......still not properly packed because I only have a poxy 20kgs limit and my summer stuff is that alone! Relations at home are neutral, if not more upbeat now as my OH and son are convinced I'll be back by September....apparently, my daughter appears to have changed her mind about wanting to actually LIVE in the UK...she only wants to go back for a long vacation, spend time with family and do all the fun stuff she's wanted to do, but then she wants to come back to all her friends here and the school she has criticized so often
Don't get me wrong, I know my daughter inside and out and she is very prone to changing her mind from one minute to the next, so I'm just taking these comments in my stride and waiting to see how she goes when back home.Anyway, I'm off to get more packing done....will check in on Sunday morning with my "toodle-ooooo"
Rubes x
Jun 19th 2009, 5:33 pm
#30
Ping-ponger
Joined: Jul 2002
Location: Dreich Alba
Posts: 12,006
Re: Going home for indefinite period
I just wanted to say a big Thank You to everyone who has offered their best wishes, thoughts and similar experiences....I really appreciate them For those of you who are in a similar situation to myself...I share your pain and conflict...it's not easy is it? I'm only doing this because my flights were mega cheap ($500 one way for me and my 11 year old)....if there was no "Bargain June" flights on offer, I think I'd still be here, spending the summer still churning over my thoughts and wishes of being back home! It's a big step for anyone to consider to walk away from one half of your family in order to do some soul searching...and until I'm back over there, I can't really comment either way on whether it's a good or a bad decision.
So, I've got 2 days to go......still not properly packed because I only have a poxy 20kgs limit and my summer stuff is that alone! Relations at home are neutral, if not more upbeat now as my OH and son are convinced I'll be back by September....apparently, my daughter appears to have changed her mind about wanting to actually LIVE in the UK...she only wants to go back for a long vacation, spend time with family and do all the fun stuff she's wanted to do, but then she wants to come back to all her friends here and the school she has criticized so often Don't get me wrong, I know my daughter inside and out and she is very prone to changing her mind from one minute to the next, so I'm just taking these comments in my stride and waiting to see how she goes when back home.
Anyway, I'm off to get more packing done....will check in on Sunday morning with my "toodle-ooooo"
Rubes x
For those of you who are in a similar situation to myself...I share your pain and conflict...it's not easy is it? I'm only doing this because my flights were mega cheap ($500 one way for me and my 11 year old)....if there was no "Bargain June" flights on offer, I think I'd still be here, spending the summer still churning over my thoughts and wishes of being back home! It's a big step for anyone to consider to walk away from one half of your family in order to do some soul searching...and until I'm back over there, I can't really comment either way on whether it's a good or a bad decision.So, I've got 2 days to go......still not properly packed because I only have a poxy 20kgs limit and my summer stuff is that alone! Relations at home are neutral, if not more upbeat now as my OH and son are convinced I'll be back by September....apparently, my daughter appears to have changed her mind about wanting to actually LIVE in the UK...she only wants to go back for a long vacation, spend time with family and do all the fun stuff she's wanted to do, but then she wants to come back to all her friends here and the school she has criticized so often
Don't get me wrong, I know my daughter inside and out and she is very prone to changing her mind from one minute to the next, so I'm just taking these comments in my stride and waiting to see how she goes when back home.Anyway, I'm off to get more packing done....will check in on Sunday morning with my "toodle-ooooo"
Rubes x
