collybabe24

After a long 20 months in oz, thousands of pounds down, wasted time, arguments, and feeling homesick and indecisive, my husband has finally agreed to come home, he admitted he had felt low for a while and was missing home and wasn't fitting in at work, geez why do men always keep things bottled up. I felt very homesick last year but got thru it for husbands sake as he was adament he would not return to the uk, we bought a house last xmas but still nothing has changed for me, no offence to anyone please but i feel i have never fitted in and everyone seems so false here, they pretend to be your friend but are so 2 faced and cant say a bad word bout oz its sooo perfect lol, yeah right? i think they have rose tinted glasses on, yes its beautiful here but u need to be rich to live here and we are really struggling, everyone has different circumstances. The problem is where to start i dont have a clue, we now have a house to sell, i have a baby due at xmas and 2 other children to consider, feels like dejavu lol we did all this coming out, so if anyone has any advice for me please feel free i.e containers, flights, house selling, i really hope i'm not stuck here for much longer as i'm feeling very low and have no one to turn to.

quoll

Oh so sorry that this is happening to you. {{{hugs}}} It must seem like an enormous task but if you perhaps sit down and make a list of all the things that need to be done and hopefully a timeline with which to achieve them - break it into small, do-able steps - then it will seem much easier. You could do what you did to get here, but in reverse. It almost seems as if there could be a re-relocation business opportunity here for someone. I'd get the DH to start contacting his UK networks to see if he can get a job then start clearing out the house and getting rid of "stuff" so that you can put the house on the market asap. Get a couple of quotes from real estate agents in the area etc. As soon as you feel that you are doing something you will begin to feel a bit more in control. Good luck!

cricket1again

I'd have your baby first. Moving countries is stressful enough never mind when you're pregnant. It's too hard. Just try and stick it out for a few more months while you put a plan together.

Shippers - we found Oss Worldwide Movers to be the best and cheapest.

Flights - have a look on the internet, print off the best deals then go to your nearest travel agent to get a better deal.

Car hire - budget care hire (in UK) are the cheapest and efficient.

Rental properties - loads and loads, too many rental properties, not enough tenants so great deals at the moment. (Best friend rents houses in the UK).

Credit rating - you won't have any. Save up money as much as possible so you've got some to live on till you get going.

Luck - I wish you heaps. We're flying home on the 10th August.

Especially good luck with having a new baby.

collybabe24

Thanks so much for your replies, luckily we still have a car and a house which is being rented out and mom has a couple of properties we can stay in so thats all good, i suppose its this end where i'm struggling as i dont understand legalities etc regarding house, we have a car on finance so have to sell that, i think the idea is just to put new kitchen in and paint house put it on market and hopefully it will sell asap if it does then we will stay in a fully furnished apartment till bub is born then fly back, it just seems so far away

charleyg

Hi I have sent you a PM.

DEEDEE01

Hi Collybabe24,

Reading you post has struck soooooooo many cords with where me and my hubby were a few weeks ago, possible still there a little now, to have spent so much money and time chasing things that will NEVER be in our reach. I do agree with you on the 'Oz is so perfect' thing too. I have NEVER felt so down in all my life, trying to climb hills that you never seem to reach the top of, false hope and promises so called 'friends' etc etc etc.
If moving to Oz has taught me anything, it is to sod everybody else and stop being so polite and helpful, it gets you nowhere, nows the time to focus on number 1, because nobody gives a crap about you or your circumstances.
I do feel for you as you have a baby on the way and 2 other children, where as me and thehubby only have each other, oh, and a recently arrived new kitten !!!
Me and the OH said, this move is a fresh start, new adventures and we said we would give it 2 years before we made any decisions to move back to the UK (unless its serious financial issues), and you seem to have reached this point, I think its a fair time scale to judge your thoughts etc and if this it what you all want, go for it. You both tried and thats all that counts. You have to be happy in life and as long as you stick together you'll be fine.
If only you lived closer, I would have certainly offered support where I could, I know exactly how you must be feeling.
Good luck with sorting out the move back to the UK and I do hope everything works out for you.
D.
xx

collybabe24

Thank you for your words of support, exactly how i feel, i really wish others would understand, i feel so happy that the decision has been made, we started doin a few reno's today and put a new toilet in and tiled it as we would really like to make at least 20 grand on house so, i just need to pick myself up now and make the most of the next few months but i really cant be bothered making the effort if it wasnt for the kids i'd be in my pj's everyday lol, good luck to everyone else on their journey's

Funky Monkey

I hope you feel better soon.

I feel just like you and you are right there is no one to turn to and thats the hardest part. I have decided all the pain and heart ache are just not worth it. Yes the U.K has it's problems but at least there are family and real friends there. Hope everything goes well for you

DEEDEE01

Now you have decided your future plans, the hard part is over, you just need to put everything into action !! Take everyday as it comes and try to take some time our for yourself (and the little one in your tummy). :-)

Best Wishes.
D.
x

brendarover

I remember you going, i remember how excited you was, sorry to hear things never turned out well in Oz.

Thing is, by the looks of it, you are as rich as anyone i know, two healthy bootifull kids, toch wood another on the way, and a husband you love and loves you!

It does not get any better than that, sod the two faced materialist tw@ts. Thats life where evr you live in the world.


One thing that has stuck me about your post is what i have highlighted. Australiais a very expensive place to live. The UK is getting cheaper, houses are getting cheaper, quite a few items are getting cheaper, but also wages are getting cheaper.

The UK is not perfect, but with the way the exchange rate is and the cost of houses in Oz, anyone leaving now, or in the past 12 months or so, or in the near future are going to seriously struggle unless you are seriously cashed uip and willing to gamble it on the Oz houses not falling in value, and the exchange rate not improving in the UK based migrants favour?


Good luck, stay happy and healthy, you will talk about your adventure to your kids in 10 years time and laugh out loud!

anson aussies

Hi colleen
i met up with you ones at a park with you and all your friends wen i
posted on ex pats for friends
sorry that its not going well for you
but congrats on baby.
I am back in England been here 2 months now as i was home sick and missed lots of things and family and friends husband found it hard as well so we came home i never said how i felt about oz as i only met you ones and you had not long brought your house so maybe people don't say how they feel some times
my husband got laid of work twice only worked 6 months out of a year when we was there .
We came back to England and we cant settle here friends have moved on i don't see my family so we are coming back in October we did need to come back as now know all the things we missed in England is not what we want
Its a shame we never met up again maybe we could of had a good moan about life in oz and i wouldn't of become a ping pom pom lol
Good luck in what ever you and your family decide
nat xx

Famous 5

I have no practical suggestions, except to approach the return to the UK in the same way you approached the move to Oz, with the added benefit of having experience of such a big move. But I did want to say that I am sorry that it hasn't worked out for you. For some people, myself included, it can be very difficult to start afresh without family and friends and your usual support networks. I have had real ups and downs over the last 3 years and at the moment I'm quite homesick for the UK. I'm not sure we'll be staying here for good, but for the time being it will be home, not least because my oldest is halfway through year 11 and we've made the decision to stay until he finishes school.

It is easy to underestimate the real cost of moving to Oz, taking into account both direct and indirect costs. Australia is not a cheap place to live and it seems particularly true of the Sunshine Coast, especially when you take into account average earnings on the Coast. Also there seems to be a disproportionate amount of people on the Coast who have made their fortune (often through property) and then retired whilst still in their late 30s/early 40s, which can be hard as it is human nature to make comparisons (and usually only with people who seem to have more than ourselves!). But as one of the previous posters said, you are rich in the ways it matters most and now you have made the decision to go back to the UK, you have something positive to focus your energies on.

Wishing you all the best in your preparations for your return to the UK and for the new baby.

collybabe24

Hi nat, i remember you, sorry it hasnt worked out for u, do u have jobs to come back to? at the moment its not going well on the coast 3 lots of our friends have lost their jobs and will be heading back to the uk in the next couple of weeks, where u heading back to? hope everything goes well for u take care x

collybabe24

Thanks everyone for ur words of support, i am in no doubt very rich and blessed with a lovely family i'm not disputing that, but hubby is on a low wage here and we are barely scraping by, whether its because i'm pregnant and i'm really needing my family around i dont know but i just want to go back to normality, we came from a rough area and it hasnt changed there, i speak to my family and friends daily and they fill me in on how bad it is in the uk but i really dont mind as i just want to be around people that care, i have my job to go back to after ive had bub and hubby has been in contact with his old boss and they would welcome him back so i have to say we are very lucky, no where is perfect i guess you just have to try and make it work but if you feel the way i do then its time to go home, people do move on but everything happens for a reason maybe something better will come along.

collybabe24

Awww feeling for you, it is awful feeling so alone and isolated, i have been so low the last couple of weeks and just cried at everything i know my hormones are everywhere too but i also suffered with depression after having my children and i feel like i'm going back there which is why i have to try and be strong and get back to where i was most happiest around my friends and family, my mom was gettin over breast cancer wen we left and as she is on her own and i'm an only child i have felt quite selfish and ive let her down she is due for more ops and i want to be there for her i have the rest of my life to live my own life but right now she needs me even though she wont admit it, and she misses the grandkids so much and they miss her. I really hope things work out for you, keep smiling