Do we, Don't we???
 

just wondered if anyone here could give me some advice??
Myself and my family have been living in Spain since Jan 2003 (Valencia region)
For the past few months my homesickness has gotten worse and I don;t know why.My other half works away and always has done, so moving back to the Uk wouldn't be too difficult. The problem I have is that I don't know if its the right decision. I miss being understood for a start (although my Spanish is pretty good somedays it's like banging your head against the wall!)then all the activities my two children used to do in UK, they aren't doing too much here. My husband is a "where ever i lay my hat" kinda guy, he just wants everyone to be happy. Although he says there is more opportunity here with house prices and that UK has hit its peak so if we went back we would be paying over the odds. My kids are settled and have good friends, so I guess it's just me being a miserable cow!!!
I would just love to know what it was that made your minds up to move back to the UK and if you are pleased with the decisions you made??

All comments gratefully received!! Cheers

Re: Do we, Don't we???
 

I would just love to know what it was that made your minds up to move back to the UK and if you are pleased with the decisions you made??

All comments gratefully received!! Cheers[/QUOTE]



hi. i'm just bumping this up because thats the big question isnt it. since I'm planning my own move back, I want to hear all the details. :)

Re: Do we, Don't we???
 

In a nutshell the lifestyle here doesn't suit us,- we miss the UK, the people, the weather (bizarrely), variety of food, tv & newspapers, culture, xmas, the sense of community that we had before, kids education(that's a biggie), opportunity to travel in Europe and beyond (cheaply as well), and more holiday time too. Course once we get back, there's loads we'll miss about the US, it's just on balance we'd rather be there than here.

Re: Do we, Don't we???
 

How long have you been there?

If it's only been a year or less then I'd say why not wait a while - it's natural to get homesick and miss all the things back "home" but there must be reasons as to why you moved away in the first place?

Also, it's easy to remember the good things about a place and block out the bad - so make sure you are really clear on what it was like to live in the UK.

If you really feel you want to come back why not have a two week holiday with some friends or relatives and see how life has or hasnt changed.

Try taking some Spanish lessons so you dont feel so isolated with not being able to speak the language, this may also help you meet some new friends who may have children and therefore your kids can start enjoyng themselves again.

It takes time when you move anywhere - new town, new county, new country - so make sure you are 100% certain that you really cant live in Spain before you make the giant leap back to the UK, otherwise you may find in a few months time you wish you were back!!

I hope this is some help, good luck with whatever you decide.

Re: Do we, Don't we???
 

Living in a diff country for any lenght of time is difficult.
We have been gone from the UK for almost 20 years living in the USA.
I am going to say that once you get the bug to go back you should go.
You should go as soon as possible.
The bug will not leave you until you go,you will be thinking of leaving most of the time.
When you make the decision to go you will feel better,then a short time later you will not be sure of your return,you will wonder if you are doing the right thing.This feeling will come and go.
Some people have said,lets give it another try and see if it gets better.It never does.
Once you start the thought process in your head of leaving, your departure is only a matter of time
If something goes wrong,you will blame it on the country you are living in.
Just remember no place is perfect,however I believe the UK to be one of the better countries to be.You should start packing immediatly if you havent already left.Goodbye.

Re: Do we, Don't we???
 

My husband and I are both from Europe, he was born in the UK and I was born in Germany, it has been almost 11 years since we left Europe (we are a Military family).
We both miss Europe a lot, specially our families (his parents live in the USA but they would like to move back when his Dad retires), the travels, the long vacation time, the transportation systems, and the Health care/Pension system etc.
The Health care and the Pension system in the UK is very good, compared to the US, if you do not have a very well job paying job in the US you can not afford to get health insurance (we are lucky because my husband is in the Military and the monthly fee is very low).
Of course we will visit the UK a couple of times before we move back so we can be sure this is what we want to do, but for now we are 90% sure we want to move back and we both look forward to it.

Re: Do we, Don't we???
 

Hi i hope that this will help!!! We emigrated to Australia just over 2 yrs ago, from the moment we stepped off the plane we knew that we would not stay long term, but we were going to give it a go... Well, we have given it a go, and it has not been easy, but then everything is sent to teach us, and we can honestly say that it has given us both so much, we left our comfort zone and did what a lot of people want to do but are too frightend to do, and for that we are so glad.

We have met some wonderful people, we are richer in terms of what we now feel about where we want to be and what we want to do. So i would say to you, stop and look at where you are in your life and what you want from it, if its not in Spain then move on, whats the big deal, you've moved once you can do it anywhere, go for it, listen to your heart not your head....
Good luck and let me know how things go. Tapalinga (Angie)

Re: Do we, Don't we???
 

Tee hee is this serious!!!! ? Can you read my mind? See my thoughts? Feel my emotions? :p

Re: Do we, Don't we???
 

Oh isn't this site great!! I actually found it a few weeks ago while looking up info about returning to the U.K


Wouldn't it be great if we all had a crystal ball to find out the golden question "Am I making the right decision?"

I'm in the same boat I desperatly want to move back ,I'm consumed with it and I'm frustrated cos i can't move back right now! but then several days later I'm more hesitant and some days just outright sure that If i did return I'd be making a huge mistake!! It's awful my heads spinning with it :eek:


For me the person who said "money can't buy happiness" was not only a fool but had also not been homesick!! cos being able to hop on a plane and visit friends and family at my lesiure would solve all my problems and i'd probably stay right where I am
As it is i'm gonna have to make do and just take the plunge! For today I'm absolutly positive that we're moving to the U.K :p

Sorry I've been no help muttymutt but be sure you're not alone in these confusing times if anybody finds the solution please post me ;)

Re: Do we, Don't we???
 

Mutty,
We did the whole 360 degree.

Started in UK, Dubai, Oman, Oz, Saudi Arabia and back to UK.

Our aim was to see the world, ave a larf, make money, make money, make money and erm ?.... oh yeh make money !.

Somewhere along the way we had three nips, we came back to UK and have put the nips in prep schools, bought the house in the country and still....making money.

In all seriousness - UK is considerably more expensive than Spain. I would not move to country that provides a poorer quality of lifestyle than the one I was leaving. I would not put my family through it either.

A good and wise soul once gave me a formula for making decisions - called think, think, think.

Think #1 about the issue - mull it over in the head, with others and on paper.
Think #2 - think it out again, share it with your inner circle of people.
Think # 3 - Put # 1 + # 2 data together, make decision and *ACT* on it.

- what do your children want ?
- what does u hubby want , rather than mind read his thoughts ?
- where will family spend summer hols if u go back to blighty
- what is unfinished in UK ?
- what needs to be started in spain

happy siesta :zzz:

Re: Do we, Don't we???
 

My husband has worked in the Merchant Navy for 22 years and has never settled really, always ont he go and has always wanted a shore based job. A job came up in the UAE and having spent time here I really thought .. Ok, yeah I ccoud live here .. But visiting somewhere is very differant to actually living there.
I must say that we sold up and spent all to move out here last year and now have to try and regain what was spent somehow! Its not the life style of for me at all, I miss so much of the Uk from ease of seeing a regular H / V to the reading the paper.
I am taken aback by so much here that it gets my goat and pisses me off, but
for the time Im here I have to make the most of it, but Im plannng on returning to the uk as soon as fiancailly possible, and I know that it will be for the right reasons. :)

Re: Do we, Don't we???
 

Thanks for all the replies, they have really helped. Well I'm still dead set on going home, but hubby is still sitting on the fence. Like he said although he is happy to return there are sooo many things that he will miss from here. The weather being top of the list!! i too feel that so much gets my goat and drives me crazy here, more so than in the UK. The expats that are here are soooo full of their own self worth, everyone was a bloody brain surgeon or something that they have more money than sense (apparently!!) definately no sense!
we have tried desaparetly to make friends with others, but most are so full of shit that theres no point. I miss having friends who you can tell anything too and have a good old chin wag with about everything and anything, not how big your bank balance is!!!!
Well we have decided to try and get our place straight and attempt to go back by next summer, so we'll see what happens.

Re: Do we, Don't we???
 

Good luck wherever you settle.

We left England and in all honesty my husband wanted to do it so much more than I did. Now we are returning I would never ram that down his throat but at the same time you always have to listen to what your gut feeling is telling you. I knew it would never be long term and am so glad he agrees that he misses lots of things as well and wants to go back as much as me.

Its funny though because normally its mum. dads etc. for us we have friends that are so much more important to us than family apart from one set of parents that are the babysitters from heaven!. We love our families but some of them are just so judgemental or jealous that the saying "You can pick your friends and not your family" is so true.

All the best.

Re: Do we, Don't we???
 

Mutty, I totally sympathise. I did two years in Spain, not a million miles from where you are, (in Jesus Pobre) and it was hard time! I loved the first 6 months but after I'd got the cheap drink, good weather out of my system I realised there was a bit more to life than sunshine and sangria. I was determined to give it a year but knew after that 6 months that I wanted out.

I totally agree about expat life over there and found it really petty and very backstabbing. People there have a real tendancy to reinvent themselves and fabricate these weird and wonderful backgrounds.

I was thrilled to finally leave and am now in the US. I can't say that I see it as a forever place at all and if I could convince my American husband to give it a go, I'd be on the next plane back to London.

Good luck in whatever you decide and at least you tried it. My removals guy in Spain told me that he moves as many out as he does in.

Re: Do we, Don't we???
 

Hello, Well I found this to be a very interesting answer. I've been living in Holland for the last 20 years but have always felt homesick.....getting worse as the years pass, parents getting older, just generally missing UK things, some unexplainable, etc. I'm thinking seriously of returning to the UK but just dont know where to start. My children are at a difficult age, 11 and 14 years, how will they cope having to swap studying in Dutch to English ? They can speak english but that's as far as it goes. Also on the point of divorse which doesn't make matters any easier !
Has anybody had any experience of this kind concerning the children, would love to hear from you.
Thanks.