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On this day 3 years ago........

On this day 3 years ago........

Old Jul 22nd 2007, 10:29 am
  #16  
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Default Re: On this day 3 years ago........

Originally Posted by pommybird
Karni - I really feel for you - my OH did not want to return to the UK at all - he loved Perth - but after many rows about it I simply could not stay in Oz any longer - the homesickness and sadness was beginning to make me ill - after one particularly bad day I am ashamed to say I gave him an ultimatum - Australia or me - lucky for me he chose meand we came back to the UK last year - although it's not been easy we are both happy and settled now and our marriage and relationship is stronger than ever, so you see your situation may have a happy ending.

As for how long to give it - well that's so individual - some people DO get over their homesickness and some don't - me I felt awful from Day 1 and knew Perth would never be home and as time went on it got worse not better - so if you are asking me what I would do in your shoes I would bite the bullet and come home ASAP but that's just me. If you dig down deep in your heart do you feel you could ever be at home in Oz?

Good luck Karni, I feel for you, a lot of people trivialise homesickness but it can be absolutely awful.

P.S There are plenty of us here on MBTUK forum who have returned to the UK and are happy.
Thanks for the advice Pommybird..

I know you are right...you know in your own heart if you feel Oz is right for you or not and I think you know quite early on...though of course there are are people who grow to love it...

the problem is my fiance is aussie and refuses to go back to the UK..which means I am definetely going back alone...you are one of the lucky ones whose partner came back with them...Unfortunately I need to face up to the fact that he is choosing his country before me which doesnt bode well for the future of our relationship..and he isnt very understanding about how I feel about missing family etc (he is very much of the opinion that Australia is the best country in the world and why would you not be dying to live here)..

I do love him very much and cant bear the thought of leaving him but then again I guess we all have a responsibility to make sure we are happy and I just dont feel I can sacrifice cutting my family out of my life just for him and his blind devotion to Oz..

Anyway..thanks again for the words of advice and am glad things have worked out for you back in good old Blighty..

Karni
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Old Jul 22nd 2007, 10:38 am
  #17  
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Default Re: On this day 3 years ago........

Originally Posted by karni31
Hutch..Where are u..back in UK or still in Oz?
I agree...if I could read a few more threads on people moving back the UK and being happy with that decision I would probably be more inclined to make that move myself
I'm in Oz and happy to be here, with no intentions of returning at the moment. Just feel that the Updates forum is one of the more balanced sections of the site and posts like pommybirds work well in there.
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Old Jul 22nd 2007, 6:15 pm
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Default Re: On this day 3 years ago........

Originally Posted by pommybird
On this day 3 years ago we set off on a journey of a lifetime - yes we flew off to Perth to start our new life in Oz!!

Well now as I sit in my house back in the UK having been home almost a year I can't believe all that has happened in the last 3 years.

As I sit and reflect several things really strike a cord in my memory. This time of year always reminds me of preparing to leave - that awful, empty, sad feeling of saying goodbye to your friends, family, neighbours, jobs, schools/playgroups, house - everything that is familiar, your life as you know it. Then I remember the elation and excitement of arriving in Oz, exploring, making new friends, enjoying the ever present sunshine and the reliably beautiful weather. But I guess what I recall the most is the sadness of being in Oz and the homesickness that became a real low point in my life and how I convinced myself I could shake it off but I never did. And lastly I remember returning home and rebuilding our lives back in the UK........ and here we are today happy and settled and ready for the next challenge in life!

Anyway we've spent a shed load of money but have I any regrets? No, none at all, our migration expereince is a big part of our life as a family and has taught us many, many things.

For anyone who is stuck out somewhere you don't want to be - I really know how you feel, but remember the UK will always be here for you and no matter how long it takes, if you really want it bad enough, you can and will be back here one day!
Great post pommybird - so nice too that you have no regrets at all - stay happy

Originally Posted by karni31
if I could read a few more threads on people moving back the UK and being happy with that decision I would probably be more inclined to make that move myself
Hi karni - there are lots of us out here who for whatever reason, emigrating just didn't work out how we planned. For some like me, it took moving away to realise that I love the UK, I love the history, the culture, the people, the countryside and the humour. I'm so glad to be home and haven't had one days regret about returning, despite the months of decision making, should we shouldn't we etc.

It's harder for you because you would be leaving behind someone you love dearly. It may take going home to make you realise just what you do want - for some like megansmummy, she knew immediately she had made the right decision in leaving hubby and coming home, but for others it could be different, they may get home and realise it's too painful to be apart from their partner so compromise and live in a place they don't feel where they belong just to be with that person. Does your fiance know how deeply you feel about this - have you had a serious discussion with him about it.

No-one can advise you what to do as only you know how you feel - I do hope you manage to come to some kind of decision soon as it's the not knowing and the uncertainty that really gets to you.
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Old Jul 23rd 2007, 8:51 am
  #19  
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Default Re: On this day 3 years ago........

Originally Posted by karni31
Thanks for the advice Pommybird..

I know you are right...you know in your own heart if you feel Oz is right for you or not and I think you know quite early on...though of course there are are people who grow to love it...

the problem is my fiance is aussie and refuses to go back to the UK..which means I am definetely going back alone...you are one of the lucky ones whose partner came back with them...Unfortunately I need to face up to the fact that he is choosing his country before me which doesnt bode well for the future of our relationship..and he isnt very understanding about how I feel about missing family etc (he is very much of the opinion that Australia is the best country in the world and why would you not be dying to live here)..

I do love him very much and cant bear the thought of leaving him but then again I guess we all have a responsibility to make sure we are happy and I just dont feel I can sacrifice cutting my family out of my life just for him and his blind devotion to Oz..

Anyway..thanks again for the words of advice and am glad things have worked out for you back in good old Blighty..

Karni
Hi Karni - sorry to hear that your fiance will not even consider a move to the UK, as you say if you sacrifice cutting out your family to be with him you may well regret it later in life, once you add children into the mix the situation is 100 times more complex and more heartbreaking so perhaps it is better to make the break now.

Whatever you decide I wish you all the best.
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Old Jul 23rd 2007, 8:56 am
  #20  
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Default Re: On this day 3 years ago........

Originally Posted by pommybird
Hi Karni - sorry to hear that your fiance will not even consider a move to the UK, as you say if you sacrifice cutting out your family to be with him you may well regret it later in life, once you add children into the mix the situation is 100 times more complex and more heartbreaking so perhaps it is better to make the break now.

Whatever you decide I wish you all the best.
Ditto from me too. Maybe a long trip back home might help you to see things differently, away from your fianceƩ and his family?
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Old Jul 23rd 2007, 9:26 am
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Default Re: On this day 3 years ago........

Coo,just feel like I have been on an emotional roller coaster reading all you posts,all written from the heart.Really good thread for people making there minds up.Pommybird,St.Georges girl,Krizzy,Pony,Kath and Graham,Adnams,Karni31,Pippilnstocking,Hutch,Louise D I wish you all warmest wishes and may all your dreams come true.Some of you have them now some are waiting,I think your words will have everybody a little.Have a lovely day and keep strong.I think I may of waffled a bit here,oops.Be lucky
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Old Jul 27th 2007, 8:49 am
  #22  
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Default Re: On this day 3 years ago........

Was in town yesterday and saw a woman I used to work with before we went to Oz - hadn't seen her for ages -explained the usual story of us coming back to the UK and why etc etc. - well I remembered her brother-in-law also migrating to Oz the day after we did - I asked how he was getting on - well apparently he had been over there with his girlfriend for nearly 3 years (northern NSW) and suddenly they just turned up back at my friend's house a couple of weeks ago out of the blue and said they'd had enough of Oz and were back for good!

He's an air con engineer and she's a hairdresser - apparently 'occupations that are in demand' but neither of them could find any permanent decently paid work - just had temp and part time positions and they found it really hard to get on there. So 3 years down the line they are starting again in the UK, they want to start a family and think the UK is a better prospect for young children!

Just goes to show there seems to be more and more of us now who realise the UK isn't so bad after all!!!

P.S on a separate note just heard on news that after all the crap weather our August is going to be drier and warmer than average - well we'll wait and see but I live in hope, sun today where we are so we're off out in a mo so bye for now!!!!!!!!!!!
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Old Jul 27th 2007, 1:40 pm
  #23  
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Default Re: On this day 3 years ago........

Originally Posted by pommybird
Was in town yesterday and saw a woman I used to work with before we went to Oz - hadn't seen her for ages -explained the usual story of us coming back to the UK and why etc etc. - well I remembered her brother-in-law also migrating to Oz the day after we did - I asked how he was getting on - well apparently he had been over there with his girlfriend for nearly 3 years (northern NSW) and suddenly they just turned up back at my friend's house a couple of weeks ago out of the blue and said they'd had enough of Oz and were back for good!

He's an air con engineer and she's a hairdresser - apparently 'occupations that are in demand' but neither of them could find any permanent decently paid work - just had temp and part time positions and they found it really hard to get on there. So 3 years down the line they are starting again in the UK, they want to start a family and think the UK is a better prospect for young children!

Just goes to show there seems to be more and more of us now who realise the UK isn't so bad after all!!!

P.S on a separate note just heard on news that after all the crap weather our August is going to be drier and warmer than average - well we'll wait and see but I live in hope, sun today where we are so we're off out in a mo so bye for now!!!!!!!!!!!


It's true pommybird. A couple from our village who moved over there just after we returned to the UK are now back here - said it's not what it was cracked up to be work wise.

So many people go over thinking that skills in demand mean good prospects, guaranteed jobs, good salary etc., but nothing could be further from the truth
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Old Jul 27th 2007, 2:00 pm
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Default Re: On this day 3 years ago........

Hi all im pretty much the same posistion as karni i have a austrailian oh not married but i have feelings of homesickness. Theres a lot of things i like about australia but there are so many things i dislike about it, the main problem ive got with is australia is workwise. I work as a tradie and eventuallty want to set up my own buisness but the amount of bullshit liciences fees etc is ridiculous and nothing more than a payoff for the unions, it makes it extremely hard for any pom trying to make it in aus. So i have to decide whether to stay or go back going back - means family big group of friends a steady job to go back to and the opportunity to set up a proper buisness without all the austrailian fees and hassles. I believe it is possible to make a good life in australia but you have to be extremely lucky and determined to get ahead here. I live in sydney at the moment but i dont envisage another 6months in sydney its a very difficult place to get ahead, sydney can be a wonderfull place but only if youve got money. Basically im just looking for some advice, i am prepared to stay a bit longer and wait for a oppurtunity to come along but australia has cost me so much finacially - but on the other hand it has also saved me - but thats another story.
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Old Jul 28th 2007, 8:24 am
  #25  
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Default Re: On this day 3 years ago........

Originally Posted by ozoz
Hi all im pretty much the same posistion as karni i have a austrailian oh not married but i have feelings of homesickness. Theres a lot of things i like about australia but there are so many things i dislike about it, the main problem ive got with is australia is workwise. I work as a tradie and eventuallty want to set up my own buisness but the amount of bullshit liciences fees etc is ridiculous and nothing more than a payoff for the unions, it makes it extremely hard for any pom trying to make it in aus. So i have to decide whether to stay or go back going back - means family big group of friends a steady job to go back to and the opportunity to set up a proper buisness without all the austrailian fees and hassles. I believe it is possible to make a good life in australia but you have to be extremely lucky and determined to get ahead here. I live in sydney at the moment but i dont envisage another 6months in sydney its a very difficult place to get ahead, sydney can be a wonderfull place but only if youve got money. Basically im just looking for some advice, i am prepared to stay a bit longer and wait for a oppurtunity to come along but australia has cost me so much finacially - but on the other hand it has also saved me - but thats another story.

Yes there are many wonderful things about Australia but work, if you're a tradie isn't one of them. People just don't realise how frustrating all the licencing, permits, rules and regulations can be. But you have to accept that it's their laws and unfortunately they can't be changed.

It's hard making decisions but if you enjoy it there and love your partner then I'd say it's worth trying to set your business up. If you hated the place then it would be a different matter.

Don't wait for an opportunity to come along though - go in search of one, even if it means moving to a different part of Oz.

Good luck
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Old Jul 28th 2007, 10:39 am
  #26  
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Default Re: On this day 3 years ago........

Originally Posted by pommybird
As I sit and reflect several things really strike a cord in my memory. This time of year always reminds me of preparing to leave - that awful, empty, sad feeling of saying goodbye to your friends, family, neighbours, jobs, schools/playgroups, house - everything that is familiar, your life as you know it. Then I remember the elation and excitement of arriving in Oz, exploring, making new friends, enjoying the ever present sunshine and the reliably beautiful weather. But I guess what I recall the most is the sadness of being in Oz and the homesickness that became a real low point in my life and how I convinced myself I could shake it off but I never did. And lastly I remember returning home and rebuilding our lives back in the UK........ and here we are today happy and settled and ready for the next challenge in life!
Crikey....you felt just how I feel most days.

I'm so glad it's all worked out well back home for you. Funny old life ain't it?!!! Long may it continue for you all
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