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Considering a move back home after 14 years.

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Old Feb 2nd 2011, 12:14 am
  #16  
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Default Re: Considering a move back home after 14 years.

Canadian Citizenship takes 15-19 months as per their website (my family has just applied).

http://www.cic.gc.ca/english/informa...processing.asp

I would apply anyway, see how your trip goes and make a decision to stay or move over the next couple of years
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Old Feb 2nd 2011, 12:26 am
  #17  
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Default Re: Considering a move back home after 14 years.

I wonder if you don't have to separate out two very different issues:

1) Your desire to be near your family and all the benefits that would bring

2) Where you would enjoy most as a place.

It sounds to me as though you love where you are and that makes me think the UK won't live up to BC in quite a lot of ways - especially as you'll be living on a shoestring in the UK for a while. But the main driver for going home seems to be family and they are not in BC and never will be.

If you stay in BC, you'll continue to love the place but feel lonely for family. If you go home, you'll have your family, but might not like the place you live as much.

Everything is a trade-off in life and I think you have to focus very hard on this one, and then make the choice with full awareness of its downsides. That way, you will be prepared for the bad things.
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Old Feb 2nd 2011, 1:32 am
  #18  
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Default Re: Considering a move back home after 14 years.

Wow, thank you all so very much for these wonderful replies! It so helpful to be able to talk this through and hear your experiences.

I agree that we'll know more after our trip this summer.

sallysimmons - I totally agree and think that is where we are at, looking at the decision as a trade-off - what is more important to us? Family or location? Once over it was location. Now, it's family.

Now the snag with Citizenship is yes, that it's going to take 15-19 months. No matter, since we would have to do all the paperwork for my two dogs, my partner's paperwork for a visa or whatever, sell up etc. However, I can't apply until I return from the UK in the summer b/c they need me to send my PR card in with my application and I'll need it to get back from my trip - is that right? That would put us at Spring 2013...ugh! I am not very patient once I have made up my mind and would feel as though I was completely wasting time here I need someone to talk some patience into me!!

Lilybilly, it's so good to hear your story. I noticed that once we had our daughter everything changed and the pull to go home got stronger over the years.

Fulwood - the 50k we would have would be from the sale of this house and most of our other posessions.

I can't recall who asked what we did. My partner works for the Government in the Ministry of Housing and Income Assistance. A government job would be nice for him but he has also worked as a lecturer/teacher in unis and colleges out here and is interested in teaching at A level in the UK though he would prob have to do some certificates or such. I am a stay at home mum not worked for over 5 years now. I have worked in the field of mental health as a recreation leader and a fitness personal trainer. I'm interested in being a teaching assistant with younger kids. The employment situation back home does worry us.

Thanks again for all your advice and help - this is an amazing forum!

Last edited by Redgal; Feb 2nd 2011 at 2:52 am.
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Old Feb 2nd 2011, 5:39 am
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Default Re: Considering a move back home after 14 years.

Originally Posted by lilybilly101
Hi Kath

I have just moved back home from living on Vancouver Island which was beautiful but a little too isolated for me in the end. I'm now living in the Stockport area and looking to move to Marple Bridge where my son goes to school. There is a sweet little village called Broadbottom. Oh my goodness, it has the most incredible community and is as pretty as an English village can be. Google it and you'll see it's website. It's amazing for families and the people are very friendly. There's lots of arty types there....I just love it!

I can identify with your desire to come home. When I had my little boy it became increasingly difficult and once I had my daughter it was game over and the move home became a 'when' rather than an 'if'!

My husband is Canadian and also had a secure but crappy paid job for his skill set. The pull to stay was there but I was going a little mad and my Dad had died, Mum was alone, and other family stuff brought us back. We're now looking for work so I'll let you know how that goes. What field are you both in?

I'm personally much, much happier to be back with family support and the variety English life offers, in both work an our social life (oh my goodness, I was so bored there at times). You sound more content there so I would wait until you're burning to leave!

I understand your worries as you want the best for your family and any move is a risk. I wish you lots of luck with your decision.
Hi L.

Sorry to jump on the thread.. Broadbottom is very nice as is Charlesworth......we live on the very edge of Glossop just off the snake pass and if you like the Peak District have you also thought of Chapel,Whaley Bridge or even Disley some of these area's are still easy to get to Marple Bridge....we just went to Buxton this afternoon and the Dales still take my breath away even on a day like today.....

Back to the thread....family is a strong pull when you have children etc especially to Mum's.....but to move overseas again you really have to also try and think about other things as well.....work, area's,friends etc they you will have to establish all over again...for me I missed my family but for the main we were our own little family and that was the main important thing to us....but what we also felt was boredom now and again...as also WA did have nice weather for most of the year and we enjoyed certain aspects of our lives there it did not offer us the culture, heritage and nearness to other countries and cultures we have here in the U.K...hence another reason for our return....it was in a lot of ways a 4 year decision for us as it took us 4 years to decided what we wanted for us...for some who hate or really are homesick in their adopted countries its a lot quicker decision....so take a deep breath and think what is going to be right for YOUR family first...hard I know, you seem happy other than not having family calling on you...but a lot with family on their doorstep dont have that family calling on them anyway....take your time and see how you feel in a while...take care
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Old Feb 2nd 2011, 6:19 am
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Default Re: Considering a move back home after 14 years.

lillybil,
If I couldn't live in the UK VI would be my next choice. What a place! The smell of the air, and on and on. But now you have the real thing and you are back in Stockport I think you said. Good for you.
Now I'm going to look up your next choice of area to live.
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Old Feb 2nd 2011, 6:32 am
  #21  
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Default Re: Considering a move back home after 14 years.

Originally Posted by Cookie
Canadian Citizenship takes 15-19 months as per their website (my family has just applied).

http://www.cic.gc.ca/english/informa...processing.asp

I would apply anyway, see how your trip goes and make a decision to stay or move over the next couple of years

I agree - Get your citizenship - it will always be "useful" to have the same citizenship as your husband and your child.

Who knows what forms you might want to fill in ten years from now?
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Old Feb 2nd 2011, 7:22 am
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Default Re: Considering a move back home after 14 years.

Originally Posted by brits1
Hi L.

Sorry to jump on the thread.. Broadbottom is very nice as is Charlesworth......we live on the very edge of Glossop just off the snake pass and if you like the Peak District have you also thought of Chapel,Whaley Bridge or even Disley some of these area's are still easy to get to Marple Bridge....we just went to Buxton this afternoon and the Dales still take my breath away even on a day like today.....

Back to the thread....family is a strong pull when you have children etc especially to Mum's.....but to move overseas again you really have to also try and think about other things as well.....work, area's,friends etc they you will have to establish all over again...for me I missed my family but for the main we were our own little family and that was the main important thing to us....but what we also felt was boredom now and again...as also WA did have nice weather for most of the year and we enjoyed certain aspects of our lives there it did not offer us the culture, heritage and nearness to other countries and cultures we have here in the U.K...hence another reason for our return....it was in a lot of ways a 4 year decision for us as it took us 4 years to decided what we wanted for us...for some who hate or really are homesick in their adopted countries its a lot quicker decision....so take a deep breath and think what is going to be right for YOUR family first...hard I know, you seem happy other than not having family calling on you...but a lot with family on their doorstep dont have that family calling on them anyway....take your time and see how you feel in a while...take care
Thanks so much - jump in away - the more the merrier and we are looking up all the places mentioned.

I've probably given the impression that I am really happy here other than family. It's a habit I have got into ( a good one nonetheless) of making the most of wherever I am and focusing on the positive. Once over, I was exactly the opposite and it's taken me a long time to get here! I guess you could say it has been a protective mechanism because whenever I am homesick I have just focused on what I do like about it here and got on with it...Otherwise I would fall apart with homesickness....But really when
I allow myself to think of it here...

I would not say that I am really happy here. What makes me happy here are the friends that I have made, the peace and quiet and sense of community. There are lots I hate about this place. I do often feel bored/stagnant and all of us definitely feel 'stuck' here - no way to go forward in terms of jobs, etc. I hate that we are 12 hour non-stop drive to a major city where there are cultural activities and things to enjoy with our daughter. yet do not want to live in a city. We love spending time in book stores. We want to be able to visit historical castles, re-enactments etc. We love walking/hiking but can only do it from May to September because of the weather here. We get masses of snow from October through until May and often the temps are below 25 and we simply stay indoors. We love camping but don't go because I am afraid of bears and cougars, lol! We miss sitting in a country pub just having sunday dinner after a walk - the bars out here are awful. We want to be able to explore a bit on weekends and visit parks so my daughter can feed ducks etc We love historical towns and villages and wandering around them and going to little markets but nowhere is accessible like it is back home. The list goes on and on..... I know that the day to day life in England won't be all rosey but still....when i really imagine leaving I think I will only be sad about leaving the friends I have made here and the more peaceful, slower pace of life. But I will not miss a lot of it here. We watch mostly BBC through our laptop and English movies. We canceled our TV out here because we couldn't stand it and all the commercials. My daughter loves Beatrix Potter and Enid Blyton and loves to do simple things like feed birds, ducks and play in streams none of which we get to do much here. we all hate shopping malls. We have very little to do here other than walking when the weather is right and I spend my days doing playdates with other mums at their house or mine which is slowly driving me insane because it's the only thing to do out here. I am not happy with either of the two schools they have out here and would have to send her on a 1 hour bus ride on her own when she starts kindergarten. The thought of doing that in our harsh winters scares the heck out of me. There is no university. My partner hates his job but there is nothing else out here for him to do. There are no jobs for me either when our daughter starts school so when I think of being here only 2 years from now my heart sinks....

Plus there are no decent East Indian restaurants in the whole of Canada compared to UK and we all love curry!!!

sigh, sorry that was a bit of a rant as I suddenly allow myself to think of all the reasons I dislike it here!!

Sure we could move to another part of Canada but really I think that would just prolong my pull to go home.

I guess you might say that I am leaning towards going home but we still will see how things go and how we all feel after our summer trip. Agreed on the citizenship. I would want us all to have dual - I'll just have to be patient.

VI is wonderful because it is full of Brits! We lived there for 6 months (could not afford it any longer) but I actually felt more homesick because it reminded me so much of home but was not home.

Last edited by Redgal; Feb 2nd 2011 at 7:25 am.
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Old Feb 2nd 2011, 7:27 am
  #23  
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Default Re: Considering a move back home after 14 years.

Originally Posted by lilybilly101
So exciting! You must be giddy.
Yes so giddy I can't even count LOL!! I wrote that yesterday and I now have 22 sleeps left!!
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Old Feb 2nd 2011, 7:42 am
  #24  
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Default Re: Considering a move back home after 14 years.

Originally Posted by Redgal
Thanks so much - jump in away - the more the merrier and we are looking up all the places mentioned.

I've probably given the impression that I am really happy here other than family. It's a habit I have got into ( a good one nonetheless) of making the most of wherever I am and focusing on the positive. Once over, I was exactly the opposite and it's taken me a long time to get here! I guess you could say it has been a protective mechanism because whenever I am homesick I have just focused on what I do like about it here and got on with it...Otherwise I would fall apart with homesickness....But really when
I allow myself to think of it here...

I would not say that I am really happy here. What makes me happy here are the friends that I have made, the peace and quiet and sense of community. There are lots I hate about this place. I do often feel bored/stagnant and all of us definitely feel 'stuck' here - no way to go forward in terms of jobs, etc. I hate that we are 12 hour non-stop drive to a major city where there are cultural activities and things to enjoy with our daughter. yet do not want to live in a city. We love spending time in book stores. We want to be able to visit historical castles, re-enactments etc. We love walking/hiking but can only do it from May to September because of the weather here. We get masses of snow from October through until May and often the temps are below 25 and we simply stay indoors. We love camping but don't go because I am afraid of bears and cougars, lol! We miss sitting in a country pub just having sunday dinner after a walk - the bars out here are awful. We want to be able to explore a bit on weekends and visit parks so my daughter can feed ducks etc We love historical towns and villages and wandering around them and going to little markets but nowhere is accessible like it is back home. The list goes on and on..... I know that the day to day life in England won't be all rosey but still....when i really imagine leaving I think I will only be sad about leaving the friends I have made here and the more peaceful, slower pace of life. But I will not miss a lot of it here. We watch mostly BBC through our laptop and English movies. We canceled our TV out here because we couldn't stand it and all the commercials. My daughter loves Beatrix Potter and Enid Blyton and loves to do simple things like feed birds, ducks and play in streams none of which we get to do much here. we all hate shopping malls. We have very little to do here other than walking when the weather is right and I spend my days doing playdates with other mums at their house or mine which is slowly driving me insane because it's the only thing to do out here. I am not happy with either of the two schools they have out here and would have to send her on a 1 hour bus ride on her own when she starts kindergarten. The thought of doing that in our harsh winters scares the heck out of me. There is no university. My partner hates his job but there is nothing else out here for him to do. There are no jobs for me either when our daughter starts school so when I think of being here only 2 years from now my heart sinks....

Plus there are no decent East Indian restaurants in the whole of Canada compared to UK and we all love curry!!!

sigh, sorry that was a bit of a rant as I suddenly allow myself to think of all the reasons I dislike it here!!

Sure we could move to another part of Canada but really I think that would just prolong my pull to go home.

I guess you might say that I am leaning towards going home but we still will see how things go and how we all feel after our summer trip. Agreed on the citizenship. I would want us all to have dual - I'll just have to be patient.

VI is wonderful because it is full of Brits! We lived there for 6 months (could not afford it any longer) but I actually felt more homesick because it reminded me so much of home but was not home.
Redgal, your experiences are so, so similar to mine. I would dream of going to a beautiful heritage home and was so happy the other day when we visited Lyme Park in Disley. It's where Pride and Prejudice was filmed. You know, when Mr Darcy comes out of the water....sigh.....It was just lovely and there was a fab adventure park for my son to play on. I'm enjoying my walks so much ore now, no matter how wet, I just love being out and about.

It sounds like you have good friends out there which is fantastic. I had one family who I adored but that was about it. Do you keep in contact with old friends here? That was a major reason for me to come home. I was so tired of missing get together's, important events in their lives. I was starting to feel the distance in a deeper way and I couldn't handle that.

I think if people and history are what matter, and you don't mind a mild, temperate (often wet) climate then home may be for you! It's a complex thing but so simple when you get here and it feels right. I don't know why I was so worked up about it!
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Old Feb 2nd 2011, 8:09 am
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Default Re: Considering a move back home after 14 years.

Originally Posted by lilybilly101
Redgal, your experiences are so, so similar to mine. I would dream of going to a beautiful heritage home and was so happy the other day when we visited Lyme Park in Disley. It's where Pride and Prejudice was filmed. You know, when Mr Darcy comes out of the water....sigh.....It was just lovely and there was a fab adventure park for my son to play on. I'm enjoying my walks so much ore now, no matter how wet, I just love being out and about.

It sounds like you have good friends out there which is fantastic. I had one family who I adored but that was about it. Do you keep in contact with old friends here? That was a major reason for me to come home. I was so tired of missing get together's, important events in their lives. I was starting to feel the distance in a deeper way and I couldn't handle that.

I think if people and history are what matter, and you don't mind a mild, temperate (often wet) climate then home may be for you! It's a complex thing but so simple when you get here and it feels right. I don't know why I was so worked up about it!
lilybilly, yes I get the sense we think very much alike.

Oh wow, yes I know the exact scene you mean! I would love to go there and my daughter would love the adventure park!

We often watch movies like that and write down where would like to go and visit - we have a whole little book full now, lol. We wouldn't have enough time in one single holiday to do them all. I would love to do things like that and everything is just so much more accessible back home.

As somewhat of an aside, my partner studied British history and politics at university and has taught it in uni out here. When I met him he had a massive Union Jack alongside a Maple Leaf on his wall and knows more about British history than I do but we all share a love for it. We went touring around the UK for our honeymoon and have some wonderful photos - I'll have to get them out tonight I think. My daughter as I type is playing with a castle I made for her and claiming to be Robin Hood, lol. I like Canada but the historical side of it is just not comparable. Heritage homes and being out and about would just be brilliant.

We actually really love the rain -whenever it rains our here ( and it rarely does) we are the only ones that rush to get our wellies on and go for a splash - we get some funny looks. And mild would be such a welcome relief from severe....like -30 to +30 within a couple of months!

I only have about 2 really close friends back home, lots of others that are not close but friends nonetheless and but my 2 close ones have lasted through us going through some major life changes, but I'm sure I'll make some more once I we are settled and out and about.

Ah, so good to hear your experiences Thank you!

Last edited by Redgal; Feb 2nd 2011 at 8:14 am.
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Old Feb 2nd 2011, 8:40 am
  #26  
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Default Re: Considering a move back home after 14 years.

Originally Posted by lilybilly101
You know, when Mr Darcy comes out of the water....sigh.....
Did he come out of the water while you were there? Come on now, don't spoil my fantasy!
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Old Feb 2nd 2011, 9:39 am
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Default Re: Considering a move back home after 14 years.

Originally Posted by sallysimmons
Did he come out of the water while you were there? Come on now, don't spoil my fantasy!
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Old Feb 2nd 2011, 10:48 am
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Default Re: Considering a move back home after 14 years.

Originally Posted by sallysimmons
Did he come out of the water while you were there? Come on now, don't spoil my fantasy!
Of course, in my head. How many times have I watched it? My husband isn't too keen on a period drama, especially one with Colin Firth! Nothing happens, it's dull conversation.....and so on.
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Old Feb 2nd 2011, 11:49 am
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Default Re: Considering a move back home after 14 years.

lol

By the way, we were looking on google at the areas you mentioned (Marple Bridge and Broadbottom) and it looks beautiful, and along the lines of what we would be interested in. What are the house prices like there?
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Old Feb 2nd 2011, 12:50 pm
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Default Re: Considering a move back home after 14 years.

Originally Posted by Redgal
lol

By the way, we were looking on google at the areas you mentioned (Marple Bridge and Broadbottom) and it looks beautiful, and along the lines of what we would be interested in. What are the house prices like there?
Go on Rightmove and you can find out. Thats what I did. Are you familiar with Rightmove?
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