Back in the UK one month - update
 

Hi everyone - well we've been back in the UK for exactly a month now so I thought that I'd update you all on how things are going here in Blighty.

We arrived early February to cold, snowy winter days, which was in sharp contrast to the 30+ Melbourne summer. To be honest though I haven't been bugged by the weather at all - there are far more important things in life than weather and anyway, spring is on the way.

It is wonderful for us just to be a family again - for those who don't know my story, our youngest daughter who was 17 at the time, only stayed in Australia for six weeks, leaving me distraught as we had to stay due to our eldest daughter being at university there. We stayed in Oz, hoping to make a go of things and hoping that our daughter may return, however our eldest daughter didn't really settle either, missed her friends and her sister and hubbys work was very sporadic and much lower paid than in the UK. Whereas in the UK we had fantastic holidays and a great lifestyle, in Australia, our finances were such that we had no choice but to return to England. Every month we had to dip into our savings to help pay the rent, which wasn't part of the plan.

Whilst we liked Australia, we didn't fall in love with it at all, however once the decision was made to return, removals and flights were booked, we actually started to feel a bit sad at leaving. After all, it was the end of our dream - 3 years of planning and hopes of a new life were coming to an end.

On our return, I expected people to be telling us "I told you so" etc., but they haven't. Most people are genuinely interested in our adventure and tell us that they wish they had the bottle to do something so exciting.

Since our return 4 weeks ago, hubby started work after one week and one phone call - it's great to be earning a decent wage again. We bought two cars and after three weeks we'd signed up for a rental property. The house was the hardest thing in that we have loads of stuff coming over from a big 4 bedroomed Australian house and British houses are much smaller. We persevered though and eventually found an beautiful old cottage just outside town with lovely views over hills, fields and a golf course. The village pub is about a 5 minute walk away :D We move in at weekend and just can't wait.

We've also been able to celebrate our daughter's 18th birthday and I'm now teaching her to drive :ohmy: It makes me so happy to be able to take her to college each morning - as she walks away, I just sit there in the car grinning, realising just how wonderful life is. It isn't big houses or sun or warm weather that make me happy, it's people and living life. Life in the UK is portrayed as being bad by the media here, but in reality it's nowhere near as bad as they try to make out and no different from anywhere else - good and bad everywhere. Before we came back, people told us of asylum seekers everywhere in our town and Poles taking over the building trade - we haven't seen one shred of evidence to support these claims.

Our social life has been renewed - it's great to get out with our mates again. Shopping is fantastic - the choice and quality of goods is just brilliant.

So to all of you who are on your way back, don't worry. Life in the UK is good. Very good. In fact wild horses wouldn't drag me back to Australia right now :)

Re: Back in the UK one month - update
 

Great post and great to hear it's all going really well! It gives those of us left stranded here so much to look forward to!

Infact I'm going to print out your post and re-read it when I'm feeling low - just to remind myself. Nevermind - coming home for a 2.5 week trip in May!

God I want to leave :thumbup: NOW!!!!

Re: Back in the UK one month - update
 

Fan-bloody-tastic Louise!:D :thumbup:

I think that I will be just like you when we get back; I will see the UK through new eyes and appreciate it all the more. I will also never buy a newspaper again. They only print hype and rubbish.

I'm so glad that you've done the right thing and gone home. Your rental sounds idyllic. Just my kind of thing. A home with character and personality. Not just a big flashy box.

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oh - how I wish I was in your shoes back "home"

I am having such a rubbish week this week with the homesickness. :( Everyone said it would get easier - its actually geting worse. we both got a jobs, purchased a house, our furniture arrived and none of it has made me/us feel better. I feel so trapped now.

The weekends seem to be worse as during the week I have to put a brave face on for work - weekend I can be myself (very misrable at the moment) this is not good for either of us.

Any suggestions - I want to try and start enjoying my time here and grit my teeth and hope this time next year I will be "home"

Est x

Re: Back in the UK one month - update
 

Hi Est,

Sorry, I'm not familiar with your situation. Where are you based? How long have you been here (assuming you're in Aus)? If you can give some details, perhaps some suggestions will come to mind? :)

GG

Re: Back in the UK one month - update
 

We have been in Brisbane since 3 Jan, left uk on 19 November so had a nice long holiday in between. Although I knew 13 hours after leaving manchester and arriving in singapore we had done wrong.

I started work in CBD on 22 January, in a legal firm, not a very friendly office - I am used to having a right laugh at work - nothing like that here. Bought a house in Forest Lake (feel trapped now). Husband started work this Monday - he is working self employed from home for his old boss - designing on the computer.

I do have things to look forward to - mum and dad coming in 53 days, sister in law and hubby in June, in laws in august. Just not looking forward to the day I have to wave them off home as I would so like to go with them and we are planning on going home in October for a holiday.

Things I am missing loads, family and friends. Other sister in law is pregnant due in April, best friends gets married in July - gutted that I cannot be there for these two massive life changes. I did not appreciate my family and friends, I obviously love and care for them loads - but did realise literally how much - and feel so selfish that it took me moving around the other side of the bloody world to realise

I just feel like crying all the time, I have tears in my eyes now. What a wos and failure I feel. Wish we had never started this whole thing now.

Est x :(

Re: Back in the UK one month - update
 

PM sent. :)

Re: Back in the UK one month - update
 

Louise thanks so much for your update.We are going home in 4 weeks time and I have been having all sorts of emotions.
Today I am having a good day and cannot wait to get home.I know its going to be tough for us to begin with and we face many challenges but just being where I belong again will be great.
I cannot wait to get to all those wonderful shops.
I was at the Plaza today and I got chatting to a lady who is English but her husband is Australian and she just longs to go home.
She was having a good moan about the price of food here etc and It was interesting to say that her husband agreed with her about Australia and was thinking about giving the UK a try.Least its just not me then.
There will be many things I will miss but when I do I will look back on all times I felt so unhappy and appreciate England for what it is.Home!
Good Luck and I wish you all the best.

Re: Back in the UK one month - update
 

Thanks for the update Louise. I feel so happy for you.
I am feeling so down at the moment. Things happening back home, i'm stuck here, so bloody hot i can't breath!!! Not sure if i can wait all year til we go home. Maybe i'm having one of my bad weeks:(
Nice to hear things about the UK that are truthful for once anyway;)

Re: Back in the UK one month - update
 

Top post Louise. Karma sent. Great to hear things are falling into place for you. What part of UK have you settled in?

Re: Back in the UK one month - update
 

Thanks everyone for the replies - I really just wanted to let you all know that life in the UK can be good so that those who are on their way back don't worry too much. Good luck to all of you returning and same to those who are still working on it :thumbup:

Undoubtedly there will be a few stresses along the way, finding houses, jobs, settling into new routines, wondering if you've done the right thing etc., but take each day as it comes and be patient and things do fall into place. I really couldn't be happier now.

Est I'm so sorry you are feeling bad - I went through exactly the same last year missing my daughter. We decided to look on living in Oz as a long working holiday and tried to experience everything we could from the place. We threw ourselves into doing all the touristy things at weekends, saw as many places as we could and told ourselves that we didn't have to stay forever if we didn't want to - that really got us through last year. Try to fill up the weekends as much as possible and visit somewhere different every week if you can. Now we're back, it's nice to look through photos of the places we visited - it's an experience.

We are from St Helens - we really didn't want to return to our home town - as it's not the nicest looking place in the world, but our youngest daughter is at college here until next year so we are so delighted to have found a place just outside the town - it's a place between two tiny villages, Crank & Kings Moss but is close enough to drive to town and just 10 minutes from our friends and family - lots of parties planned for the summer :beer:

Re: Back in the UK one month - update
 

Well done for your update, more than I have managed.:o

I am so pleased to hear that you are settling in well. Do you find that the days are flying past?

Please keep us updated after you have moved in. Did you have any problems finding a rental?

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Hi Woody - how is it going at your end? Are you still settled and having fun? I just can't believe just how quickly the time goes :ohmy: I said to my daughter only this afternoon that there just aren't enough hours in the day or days in the week to fit everything in - and I'm not even working yet!!

We didn't really have much of a problem with finding a rental - there are a few around but they all seemed too small as we have four adults now (girls are 18 and 21) so really we wanted at least 3 double bedrooms and two living rooms - we found most had two bedrooms and the standard box room and one living room. Luckily though we found the cottage just outside town which has everything we want, except it only has one bathroom and with three women in the house hubby is going to really suffer :D

We did find that many agencies wanted credit checks and work references - one even wanted a guarantor as we didn't have 3 months of employment! Most did say though that if we could put up 3 months advance rent that would be ok. The one we got though didn't even bother with references of any kind - just paid the one month rent and bond and that was it. As our stuff only arrives back mid April, I've just bought airbeds today :unsure: I'll keep you posted on how things go :)

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Thanks Louise for your post. I am glad things have gone well. Things take time but you seem to have fitted straight away which is great for you and your family.

We too are making plans to return and if we hadn't bought this darn house it would have been sooner rather than later, but that's life.Having said that I at least feel at peace with things and I am finding it easier.

My oh as already had offer of work so that's not a problem not that it ever was but it makes you feel better just knowing that it's there. All the best

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HI Sweetheart,

I have been here now since last August and felt like you everyday nearly last year. Like you we bought a house and shipped our furniture except we went one step further and bought a business.

This year started off just as bad for the first two months. Hubby now has accepted I want to go home and we can put the business up for sale in sept and the same as the house to avoid capital gains. MY OH being on board has really changed my attitude now. If I feel bored I go to the beach or at least a walk on it. I am also starting an internet based business which is going to be .co.uk so at least I will hopefully have some money coming in to the UK account before we actually get back. Plus this is now keeping me busy and time seems to be passing quicker. Its a pity you are in Brisbane. If you fancy a trip down the goldie in the school hols PM me and we can have a fun day. PS I so took my family and friends for granted too and that is the part that makes me the most upset, that and selling the blooody house. aaaahhhh

anyway just try and make the most of the time you are still here, treat it like a long holiday
best of luck
Nicola

Re: Back in the UK one month - update
 

Nice to hear things are going well for you Louise. I too have a 17 year old gonna be 18 when we return to UK and wondered if you heard anything about College costs etc etc !(as I read somewhere that if you are out of the country 3 years or more you have to pay) do you know if this is correct?

Wish my eldest was also happy about going back:( giving me grief to say the least, she wants to stay), its so hard, there we were convincing her Australia was great, now Im back to trying to convince her UK is better:eek: I just really want her to come back with us if and when we return.

hope all continues to go well, keep us posted.

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Your situation sound very similar to our own. We left a 17 year old daughter who only stayed in oz for 6 weeks before returning to the uk. Like you i was distraught :( .

Like you we returned to the uk and have been back for 2 years now. I know how you were feeling. Now though, we are considering returning and our daughter is all up for coming with us, along with her boyfriend :D Wild horses would have kept her in oz last time. She has grown up alot since then though.

Anyway, just wanted to say hi, glad you are a family again cause it makes all the difference. Just enjoy!

Mandy

Re: Back in the UK one month - update
 

It's so difficult with older children isn't it? I suppose it's inevitable really that being a family of adults, each will have their own feelings and likes/dislikes etc. It's really lucky if everyone likes the same thing at the same time. I did hear that if you are not permanently resident prior to attending college/university then you have to pay full fees but I'm not sure what the length of time is - it didn't affect us as our daughter only stayed for 6 weeks in Oz. I think there was a full thread on this subject though just before Christmas which may help you. Good luck with it all.

Hi Mandy - I really hope it all works out for you if you do decide to return. It does make a huge difference to how you feel about a place if your family is split up. We had financial concerns in Australia but I think we could possibly have overcome these if our daughter had stayed there. If it had been Spain or somewhere that we could have visited then it may have been easier but the distance was just too far. I do feel now though that it was a huge mistake taking her at 17 - totally the wrong age, especially for her personality as she doesn't like any change at all. As you say though, they mature and grow up and realise that there is a big wide world out there waiting for them to explore. Good luck with everything.

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:confused: Louise - this so interesting to read. We too are now back in Blighty after just 3 months in Sydney. We were homesick and my OH struggled to get work (he's a plumber/gas fitter which enabled us to obtain visa's - permanent residents). We thought there would be loads of work for him - but not the case and very poorly paid! I worked in the city as a PA and the people weren't friendly, no banter or laughs. The train journey on the western line was not pleasant and it took an hour 10 mins each way.

We missed home, friends & family desperately. I cried every day and couldn't speak to anyone from home without getting upset.

We're now renting a tiny flat as we sold our home but there's still a part of us that's missing Oz - really weird I know - but we are actually toying with going back but to Perth. It was, like you, our dream.

Re: Back in the UK one month - update
 

Hi Louise....glad to hear things are going well for you and you are so happy, that is what it is all about isn't it!

Our stories are similiar, as you know, except my husband took it very badly coming back as we thought we had 'gone for good'. He became very depressed before we returned and has struggled over the last few months, but today he passed his LGV part 1 at the first attempt and I am so pleased as it has given him a boost. He didn't want to go back into his old profession so has decided to do driving (HGV as it was but is now known as LGV....Large Goods). He started driving on Monday and passed today with flying colours, has to wait 2-3 weeks for the licence to come through then he can take the second part (artics), then........he can get work again. It has been so hard for him as he feels to blame for everything going wrong, even though it wasn't his fault.

I've been lucky and found a job I love. I work in a school and everyone is so nice and I really look forward to going to work every day. My job before we moved used to reduce me to tears, I hated it that much.

We are both looking forward to buying a house of our own again and that time isn't too far away. The kids are really happy to be home and counting the days that our cat can come and join us, which will be sometime in May. I came home from work yesterday to find a letter from Spain with photo's of Katie which gives me hope that I might not have a fight on my hands to get her off the lady who is looking after her.

So, yes, we are happy to be home too....more than happy. Life in Spain was lovely, but very hard financially and we too lost a lot. But, things can only get better as they say and after today we are a big step nearer getting back on our feet. Wild horses wouldn't drag me back either!

Good luck to everyone moving back home.

Sparkle

Re: Back in the UK one month - update
 

'Before we came back, people told us of asylum seekers everywhere in our town and Poles taking over the building trade - we haven't seen one shred of evidence to support these claims'.


Hi I just wanted to say what a well balanced and clear report you have given since your return to the UK. I did however want to ask where your town is because i want to inform you that there are indeed many many east european and european people flooding into the UK, I can not walk up Lincoln high street withought hearing polish spoken by every third person i pass. So you are either very fortunate in the town where you live to not have many europeans living there or you need to look a little closer. Please dont take this as a criticism of you personally as i beleive from your post you have obviously made the correct decision. I just want to point out s you have said in your post that there are good and bad pints everywhere, nowhere is utopia and i have to say that it is my opinion that the UK is sinking under the burden of more and more people entering the country extremely easily and having access to all facilities and benefits without having to jump through the many many hoops that we are all jumping or have jumped through to get into Australia.
Once again this is not maent as a personal dig it is just my opinion.


Nev.

May i also just add this is not a slur on people of any race, colour or creed, it is about this country allowing so many people in when we already cannot cope with what we have here.

Re: Back in the UK one month - update
 

There are plenty of polish in and around where i live and work.

Sorry to be blunt but thats the truth :blink:

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If you're not keen on immigrants, Aus may not be the best choice for you. For example, more than 30% of Sydney's population is not Australian.

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Hi Nev - no I certainly don't take it as a criticism at all. I do really understand that there are too many people being allowed into the UK and that there are certain people who are taking over certain trades and areas. I think what I was really trying to say was that the people around my area in particular had been exaggerating in many ways. I do think that whilst the UK has many good points, it does have to change it's policies in others and it's immigration policy is one of those things.

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Hi there Sparke - Big huge CONGRATULATIONS to your hubby!! Well done. It's the start of a new chapter for you all now hey? I'm so pleased that you are feeling settled again, lets hope hubby will soon be working in his new career and enjoying it - is he feeling better now? I bet he's totally on a high now :thumbup:

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I'm just wondering about all of the Polish people and whether they actually effect these posters PERSONALLY? Do they cause them any personal trouble? Do they come up and offend them personally? I suspect they probably don't and that these posters are just jumping on the media bandwagon that "Blair/Brown ruining England" despite it being the 2nd most economically sound country in Europe.:sneaky:

When you people have lived outside of the UK for any length of time please come back and comment. It would be good to see how your opinions have changed when you become aware that some countries have bigger issues than the Polish workers coming over!

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PERTH ? :eek: I suggest you read the 'legoland perth' thread first! and Janeyray's recent update.

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I went back home recently and whilst I did hear many more East European accents than on previous visits, I obviously missed this huge wage of economic migrants from Poland.:blink: I am old enough to remember the same grumbles about the Ugandan Asians, Bangladeshi's, Pakistani's, Jamaicans, Vietnamese....all of whom came, settled and sometimes went home to their countries. Society adapted and moved on. If I was Polish, able to move to the UK, be happy and earn good money to send home to my family, I would do the same thing. Most of the Poles that I have met over the years were hardworking and honest people. It is human nature to grab what you can if it is offered. The UK is not sinking under the weight of uncontrolled immigration just yet, despite what The Sun says. :)

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Totally agree with you. I still remember my parents discussing Enoch Powell's "Rivers Of Blood" speech donkey's years ago. The UK was supposedly doomed back in the 70's because of the immigrants. Hasn't happened and it's been 30 odd years.

I had, and still do have, absolutely no problems with anyone moving to the UK to better themselves, work hard and earn a decent crust. :thumbup:

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Acutally on the contrary, I am going out this evening with my wife and daughter to have some drinks with a polish couple we have met who are having a house warming. I resent the fact that you think i am jumping on the media band wagon, do you think i am a child or something?? I can actually make my own mind up thank you very much and if you read my origional post carefully enough you would have seen that i was mearly expressing an opinion which i stand by, This country IS allowing too many people in, some of them are contributing to our society by earning and paying taxes like the rest of us but maybe its you who should take a look around and see that many many of them are not contributing and are just sponging off our freebie system. Even the big issue sellers on the high street have been taken over by these people, this has not been told to me by 'the sun' this i see with my own two eyes. Can i also say you have no idea who i am or what i have done in my life, so you dont know if i or my wife have lived anywhere else other than this country, you just assume that because we want to emigrate to Australia that we have never been or seen anywhere else. WRONG!!!
The OP took my post as it was meant as shown by her comments, maybe you would have the curtesy to do the same.

Nev.

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To be honest he is up and down and although pleased he passed it hasn't made him feel better about himself. I don't think he will until he is earning again and we can move into our own place.

On the subject of 'Poles' we have no experience of any settling where we are. I do agree that it is too easy to enter the UK, if we upped and went to Spain with no plans we certainly wouldn't have been given any help whatsoever. We were entitled to absolutely nothing and lived off what we earned or had saved, and rightly so I believe.

All we want to do now is earn a living, buy a house again and live happily as a family again enjoying what is around us and what we should have stuck to in the first place!

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:) Hi... Just wanted to back up what Red Lion said regarding Lincoln and the Polish....Down Hill Tesco's (Canwick Road) is worse than the High Street.... It isn't just Polish also Latvians and Albanians etc... Some housing areas in Lincoln are flooded with them ie Monks Road, locals are finding this a struggle especially with the group fights that are happening between themselves - also imagine living in your same house for 15 odd years to find out that it has been sold and about 11 Latvians moving in, I worked for an Estate Agents and watched this happening..We moved from Lincoln last Summer to Dorset and the problem does not appear to be the same here at the moment... Not all of England has been affected by this and its still a great place to live - well I love it here in Poole.. :)

England should make the immigration tougher and take a leaf out of Australia or Canada etc books... :) :)

May i also just add this is not a slur on people of any race, colour or creed, it is about this country allowing so many people in when we already cannot cope with what we have here

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What a lovely post to read, makes me feel good knowing that their still is some good in the UK.

We are looking into the move from Toronto Canada, it is sooo cold here, I've had enough. 90% of the family live there.
We worry about the housing situation, as we have never owned a home in the UK before. we own here, and we find it would be hard to see our house money be dwindled away on rental properties...I quess we could always find the 'worst house on the nicest street'. If that is an option anymore?

Well, good luck w/your family future, It will be nice to be back too. We are thinking Suffolk/Essex. More affordable.

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I think Lincs is particularly badly affected because of the fruit and veg picking/packing/processing operations that are in abundance there. Cheap labour thats all it is. My friend lives in Spalding and has the same issues.

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I don't understand why people feel so threatened from Polish People. I do business with some Polish people in the UK, who are hard working and pay their tax like anyone. They are also highly skilled and reliable tradespeople, Polish plumbers can actually be bothered to ring you back and fix the problem for a reasonable price.

All the Brits can do is whine about how their jobs are being taken and how different it is in Canada,(never having lived there of course).

Jonathan

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Yep, they do that about Australia too! ;)

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Again if you read my post properly i quite clearly stated that we have made good friends with a hard working couple who are contributing to this country. In actual fact polish people are just an example that i used, what i am trying to say is that the UK should stop or at the very least tailor the amount of people coming into the country and i mean all colours races and creeds I do not want this to turn into a race issue it is totally the opposite of that. Yes i know these feelings are felt in other countries too but can we just be clear about one thing, Australia is positively encouraging people to move there because they tell us that there is a skills shortage in various areas, THEY TELL US THIS remember. There is no such situation in the UK and yet we open the doors for thousands to flood into this country every single week adding to an already stuffed up health service and an already burdened benefits system which by the way i have no entitelment to in Australia if and when we get there, not that i want benefits, i want to work and earn my way. You know i really do feel for those people that have been through this nightmare of a journey to get to whatever country it is that you are in, only to find that it is not working out for you. I do not believe that Australia is some kind of Eutopia but please be under no illusion neither is lovely oldy worldy full of history, varying weather, great pubs UK. I absolutely love this country what i cannot stand any more is what is happening to it. Yes i have my family and friends and great beer etc but this place is heading down a very dark and slippery slope and i for one do not want my daughter to be a part of it when the S**T hits the fan over here. I wish all of you coming back or indeed moving away from UK all the very best in the personal choices that you make.

Nev.

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I hear this phrase quite a bit. Could you be a bit more specific? Exactly what kind of sh*t is going to hit what fan? How do you see the future of the UK? Do you just mean it's going to be overrun by immigrants? Backlash, civil war? Just curious.

Also, apart from the odd bit of rosy retrospection here and there, I think most people going back are under no illusions about the UK, as they spent most of their lives there, and many of them until quite recently. They just feel that the UK is where they really belong, warts n all.

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Hi Jonathan. I think people feel threatened by anyone coming into the country who will do their job for half the pay that British workers are getting. Think about it - if you were employed by someone and they suddenly sacked you off in favour of paying Polish guys less, you'd be a bit miffed wouldn't you? It's the same the world over - my husband had Australian guys making comments about British people taking their jobs. It's only natural to be peeved if folks are coming in from other countries and forcing wages down. What do you really think they are going to do - welcome them all in and buy them a pint down the pub on a Friday afternoon to celebrate new found friends?

I love living in England again, but am absolutely convinced that something needs to change with our immigration policies. It simply cannot be a free for all for the whole of Europe - I'm no economist but even I can see that our benefit system and health service cannot survive if the current levels of immigration continue.

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Ditto me.

Come on Nev - don't be shy. Paint us a picture of this apocalyptic vision of the future of yours. Is it going to be like "The Terminator", only with Polish plumbers instead?