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Anyone Else Feel They Are In Limboland?

Anyone Else Feel They Are In Limboland?

Old Jun 26th 2007, 10:47 pm
  #121  
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Default Re: Anyone Else Feel They Are In Limboland?

I take comfort it the fact that i am not the only one going through these feelings. I did think for a while that there must be somthing wrong with me for not wanting to live in lovely sunny oz, all my friends back home said it and so did my hubs, but my heart is in the uk, and it looks like it has plenty of company.
i do hope we all find our way back where we need to be, follow your hearts, i know thats what i intend to do even though it will be a bumpy road on the way.
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Old Jun 26th 2007, 10:53 pm
  #122  
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Default Re: Anyone Else Feel They Are In Limboland?

Originally Posted by PLANTS
Oh we did this too!
Bought a house thinking we would be more settled, didn't.
! went back to UK for a holiday "just to see" and loved it!
Came back, couldn't settle, bought a puppy, Bella, and she is wonderfu but didn't make me feel any more settled than before! Poor dog has been to UK and back again, now going to go back again poor thing!!

When we left UK my gut instinct was to stay firmly where I was and I SOOOOOO wish I had listen to my gut instinct! We thought we could accept the Aus job offer, come back and be settled but it just hasn't happened.
Damn and double damn!!

To make matters worse my brother has had a mini stroke, had an op in UK and worried the life out of me, being over here has not helped one tiny bit it has made me realise just how important family really is. He is fine now and recovering.



Di


oh di

what a nightmare, i feel for you so much, i know at times how crap, desperate and just down right depressive i feel and we have a date to go home, i might add we have no house to go to yet!!! lol, but we have an end in site, i just couldnt imagine continuing that limbo feeling for any longer - im desperate to get back as it is..............

i sincerely hope your brother is ok, thats another thing you just didnt need right now, but at least it was quickly identified and he can now take treatment to prevent any more problems.

Big, warm hug for you, i think you need and deserve it

mandxx
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Old Jun 26th 2007, 10:59 pm
  #123  
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Default Re: Anyone Else Feel They Are In Limboland?

[QUOTE=PLANTS;4970256]
Originally Posted by karni31


I am lucky to have him too.

Life isn't straightforward for me, I have two grown up children, one married in Rugby and two grandkids and a grown up daughter here in Perth married to an Aussie and expecting her first child in December, plus I have a teenage son. If I could put them all in the one country I would but I can't.

Depression has been in my life on a off for years and years, sorted for a while with tablets, off, ok for a while then back on again. But I have to say it has probably been worse since emigrating here in 1996 because as good as this country is, and yes it is good and has a lot to offer people, it just doesn't hold my soul. Plain and simple I don't look out the window at the plants and scenery and go oooh arrgh look at that - I go "*@*X*@**", my camera hardly comes out unless its to take photos of my craft stuff either for my blog! How sad is that!

Oh and clothes shops, I meant dream on about clothes shopping in UK, not here, gee's, I'm not that mad! YET anyway!


Di
Plants,

Can totally relate to the camera never coming out. When I was in Australia on my years working holiday I took hundreds upon hundreds of photos...since I have been here this time it hasnt been out once...I think its a combination of feeling like have seen it all before and all looks the same and feeling that I dont want to have memories of this time as I feel so bad..
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Old Jun 27th 2007, 1:58 am
  #124  
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Default Re: Anyone Else Feel They Are In Limboland?

Originally Posted by Fleaflyfloflum
Since we made the decision to go back to UK. Every single day i get this sense of living in limboland.
No point making new friends as we are leaving.
No point buying a new TV
No point buying house plants as we cant take them with us.
No point going for promotion at work or doing extra training. I will never do this kind of work again when i return to UK

It is quite disconcerting. I am floating around with no purpose until i leave.

Anyone else feel like this? What things do you feel are no point in doing anymore?
Totally understand about being in limboland, feel exactly the same, esp the making the effort to make new friends bit, we are in Sydney, have been for over 2 years, 2 years too long for me and the way I am at the mo, counting down the days til we're out of here, I wouldn't exactly be a little ray of sunshine anyway

Perhaps we 'waiting to leave' bunch should have a meet up - we could call it the 'countdown club' and have really good guilt free moans about Oz!!

PP
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Old Jun 27th 2007, 2:15 am
  #125  
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Default Re: Anyone Else Feel They Are In Limboland?

Originally Posted by pickledpossum
Totally understand about being in limboland, feel exactly the same, esp the making the effort to make new friends bit, we are in Sydney, have been for over 2 years, 2 years too long for me and the way I am at the mo, counting down the days til we're out of here, I wouldn't exactly be a little ray of sunshine anyway

Perhaps we 'waiting to leave' bunch should have a meet up - we could call it the 'countdown club' and have really good guilt free moans about Oz!!

PP
Hey pickledpossum,

I am in Sydney also...am keen to hear a bit more about your experiences here...did u feel from the start u couldnt stay or did it take a while to hit u? Where abouts in Sydney are u? I am in Northern suburbs...Is your partner a Brit also? I have been here 4 months with my Aussie partner but dont think I can stay here long-term....is all a bit of a mess..
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Old Jun 27th 2007, 2:59 am
  #126  
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Default Re: Anyone Else Feel They Are In Limboland?

Originally Posted by karni31
Hey pickledpossum,

I am in Sydney also...am keen to hear a bit more about your experiences here...did u feel from the start u couldnt stay or did it take a while to hit u? Where abouts in Sydney are u? I am in Northern suburbs...Is your partner a Brit also? I have been here 4 months with my Aussie partner but dont think I can stay here long-term....is all a bit of a mess..
Hi Karni,

We are in Northern Beaches, and although a lovely place to be, its not for me. Yes, other half is also a Brit and it was his idea (he's had better:curse to come over for a 2 year stint, just to experience a different way of life.

Kids were 4 and 6 at the time so young enough not to have too much of an impact on their schooling, so I went along with it, thinking 2 years out of a whole lifetime is nothing and that as a family, we would all benefit from the experience. I still have to hold on to this thought when I sit and think of all the things we have missed in the UK, family weddings, big birthday bashes etc, and of course all the money spent on our 'experience'.

Well 2 years came and went and OH wanted to stay and I didn't. We therefore reached a compromise and are now moving to the States in September. Its our compromise, I dont want to be here, OH doesnt want to be in UK. I am confidant that it will work over there as it is at least in the Northern Hemisphere and therefore v. cold Christmases the biggest thing, other than family obviously, I've missed!! And cheaper and shorter flights to UK.

I have also felt quite alien here, as I have never seen what the "love it here, isn't it great" brigade see.

Another biggy for me being here, is not being able to just pick up the phone at elevenes and have a natter with your mates in the UK, well, not unless you want to wake them at 2am!!!

Karni, whatever you decide, stay or go, at least you'll be an interesting party guest with tales of your travels and experiences

PP
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Old Jun 27th 2007, 3:21 am
  #127  
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Default Re: Anyone Else Feel They Are In Limboland?

Originally Posted by pickledpossum
Hi Karni,

We are in Northern Beaches, and although a lovely place to be, its not for me. Yes, other half is also a Brit and it was his idea (he's had better:curse to come over for a 2 year stint, just to experience a different way of life.

Kids were 4 and 6 at the time so young enough not to have too much of an impact on their schooling, so I went along with it, thinking 2 years out of a whole lifetime is nothing and that as a family, we would all benefit from the experience. I still have to hold on to this thought when I sit and think of all the things we have missed in the UK, family weddings, big birthday bashes etc, and of course all the money spent on our 'experience'.

Well 2 years came and went and OH wanted to stay and I didn't. We therefore reached a compromise and are now moving to the States in September. Its our compromise, I dont want to be here, OH doesnt want to be in UK. I am confidant that it will work over there as it is at least in the Northern Hemisphere and therefore v. cold Christmases the biggest thing, other than family obviously, I've missed!! And cheaper and shorter flights to UK.

I have also felt quite alien here, as I have never seen what the "love it here, isn't it great" brigade see.

Another biggy for me being here, is not being able to just pick up the phone at elevenes and have a natter with your mates in the UK, well, not unless you want to wake them at 2am!!!

Karni, whatever you decide, stay or go, at least you'll be an interesting party guest with tales of your travels and experiences

PP
Best of luck Pickledpossum in the States...like you say it will be a shorter more affordable flight back home...Oz is just soooooo far away...

If I do head back to UK..(which looks increasingly likely)..will feel like a bit of a fool and a failure...but stuff it..

I have travelled all around Australia on a previous trip here and thought Sydney would have enough going on to keep me entertained..I just feel now that have seen all there is to seen..been to all my favourite places dozens of times and feel trapped here now...everything seems a bit empty without family to share things with...

I know I mustnt be naive and think when I was back in the UK I was always jetting around Europe, but to have that option taken away from u to see all the variety that is on our doorstep in Europe feels gutting..feels like a bit of a prison sentence here..with the only holiday trip being a few weeks back in UK/Ireland to see family every few years..

What have your experiences been of Sydney? I find there is a certain brashness to people here..a superficiality/vanity and overemphasis on the way u look..

My partners Aussie and he cant understand the way I feel about his country and takes it as a personal attack on him...

By the way..would much prefer to be in the Northern Beaches than where we are..we are in Chatswood in suburban hell..at least u are near the ocean!!
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Old Jun 27th 2007, 3:41 am
  #128  
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Default Re: Anyone Else Feel They Are In Limboland?

Originally Posted by karni31
Best of luck Pickledpossum in the States...like you say it will be a shorter more affordable flight back home...Oz is just soooooo far away...

If I do head back to UK..(which looks increasingly likely)..will feel like a bit of a fool and a failure...but stuff it..

I have travelled all around Australia on a previous trip here and thought Sydney would have enough going on to keep me entertained..I just feel now that have seen all there is to seen..been to all my favourite places dozens of times and feel trapped here now...everything seems a bit empty without family to share things with...

I know I mustnt be naive and think when I was back in the UK I was always jetting around Europe, but to have that option taken away from u to see all the variety that is on our doorstep in Europe feels gutting..feels like a bit of a prison sentence here..with the only holiday trip being a few weeks back in UK/Ireland to see family every few years..

What have your experiences been of Sydney? I find there is a certain brashness to people here..a superficiality/vanity and overemphasis on the way u look..

My partners Aussie and he cant understand the way I feel about his country and takes it as a personal attack on him...

By the way..would much prefer to be in the Northern Beaches than where we are..we are in Chatswood in suburban hell..at least u are near the ocean!!
Karni

I lived in Sydney for about 4 yeas and all the things you've mentioned, I felt too.
I found it really quite thin on the ground, if you scratched the surface there wasnt anything underneath. I too got bored of the same places to go etc.The Sydneysiders I found alot to be quite superficial. I got sooo bored there after a while & tbh, where I now live is alot more beautifull but I feel the same - lacking variety/diversity etc.
When I was in Sydney, I seemed the only person I knew who felt like that, I started questioning myself, was it me?
DONT ever feel like a fool or failure for coming here & going home. You had the oomph to give it a go, remember that.
I've come to realize that even though I moved to a new area, whilst I do see positives to here, I just dont want to live here anymore, I'm bored of it.
xxxx
PS OI started seeng my time here like a sentence too whilst waiting for c'ship
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Old Jun 27th 2007, 4:05 am
  #129  
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Default Re: Anyone Else Feel They Are In Limboland?

Originally Posted by birdynumnum
Karni

I lived in Sydney for about 4 yeas and all the things you've mentioned, I felt too.
I found it really quite thin on the ground, if you scratched the surface there wasnt anything underneath. I too got bored of the same places to go etc.The Sydneysiders I found alot to be quite superficial. I got sooo bored there after a while & tbh, where I now live is alot more beautifull but I feel the same - lacking variety/diversity etc.
When I was in Sydney, I seemed the only person I knew who felt like that, I started questioning myself, was it me?
DONT ever feel like a fool or failure for coming here & going home. You had the oomph to give it a go, remember that.
I've come to realize that even though I moved to a new area, whilst I do see positives to here, I just dont want to live here anymore, I'm bored of it.
xxxx
PS OI started seeng my time here like a sentence too whilst waiting for c'ship
Birdynumnum..

Thanks for that..where is tbh?

I know everyone says not to feel silly going home but cant help it..am sure there will be some who will think 'what a silly girl'...

when do u head home?
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Old Jun 27th 2007, 4:31 am
  #130  
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Default Re: Anyone Else Feel They Are In Limboland?

Originally Posted by karni31
Birdynumnum..

Thanks for that..where is tbh?

I know everyone says not to feel silly going home but cant help it..am sure there will be some who will think 'what a silly girl'...

when do u head home?
to be honest is tbh (just reread my post, terrible punctuation on my part)
I'm nthn NSW, near Byron.
Waiting for my UK passport to be renewed b4 heading back.
Now Karni, why are you a silly girl for trying to live somewhere else & realizing you prefer home? If you decided to try a new food or a new haircut but decided it wasnt for you, you'd put it down to experience wouldnt you. Life about experiences isnt it, if we never tried anything new how boring would our lives be?
I moved here in 2000, then I moved back to UK, spent 14 months home, came back out here, now moving back 20 months later again - sure some people may think I'm mad, if they do, I dont care, its been hard deciding each time and I did what I felt was right at the time. Having said that, everyones been/being really supportive & understanding.
Dont give yourself a hard time my dear, its stressful enough without adding to it, easy to say I know but just dont want you to think of yourself as a failure
xx

Last edited by birdynumnum; Jun 27th 2007 at 4:33 am.
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Old Jun 27th 2007, 4:38 am
  #131  
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Default Re: Anyone Else Feel They Are In Limboland?

Originally Posted by birdynumnum
to be honest is tbh (just reread my post, terrible punctuation on my part)
I'm nthn NSW, near Byron.
Waiting for my UK passport to be renewed b4 heading back.
Now Karni, why are you a silly girl for trying to live somewhere else & realizing you prefer home? If you decided to try a new food or a new haircut but decided it wasnt for you, you'd put it down to experience wouldnt you. Life about experiences isnt it, if we never tried anything new how boring would our lives be?
I moved here in 2000, then I moved back to UK, spent 14 months home, came back out here, now moving back 20 months later again - sure some people may think I'm mad, if they do, I dont care, its been hard deciding each time and I did what I felt was right at the time. Having said that, everyones been/being really supportive & understanding.
Dont give yourself a hard time my dear, its stressful enough without adding to it, easy to say I know but just dont want you to think of yourself as a failure
xx
burdynumnum..
what made u come back a second time?..
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Old Jun 27th 2007, 4:43 am
  #132  
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Default Re: Anyone Else Feel They Are In Limboland?

I am always amazed by people who say to me 'why on earth would you want to come back here (UK), your so lucky being there, wish I was etc .....
Then when you say to them, 'ok, come over, they'll take everybody its so easy to get in!!' to which the reply is always the same, 'oohh no I couldn't do it, couldn't leave Granny whatshername, the cat, the milkman ....., couldn't live that far from home

So because we have the guts to experience a new way of life for a little, and return wiser and richer (in life I mean!!) we're thought of as mad, strange, odd, stupid .... when these people haven't the guts to even try it for a little while.
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Old Jun 27th 2007, 4:47 am
  #133  
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Default Re: Anyone Else Feel They Are In Limboland?

Originally Posted by pickledpossum
I am always amazed by people who say to me 'why on earth would you want to come back here (UK), your so lucky being there, wish I was etc .....
Then when you say to them, 'ok, come over, they'll take everybody its so easy to get in!!' to which the reply is always the same, 'oohh no I couldn't do it, couldn't leave Granny whatshername, the cat, the milkman ....., couldn't live that far from home

So because we have the guts to experience a new way of life for a little, and return wiser and richer (in life I mean!!) we're thought of as mad, strange, odd, stupid .... when these people haven't the guts to even try it for a little while.
pickledpossum

u are dead right...I just feel I have spent a year and a half waiting to get my visa to get in here and am throwing the towel in after about 5 months...and before that I spent a years working holiday here...so all in all my life has revolved around Oz for about 3 years..now I dont think I ever want to come back here again..
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Old Jun 27th 2007, 4:56 am
  #134  
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Default Re: Anyone Else Feel They Are In Limboland?

Originally Posted by karni31
burdynumnum..
what made u come back a second time?..
sheer madness coupled with a shock at UK winters I think!!!!!!!!!
No seriously, to cut a long story short, I came back to try the area we'd initially meant to.
Although I had reservations on Oz, I came back to live in the area/live the life I'd initially migrated for, to live in a city wasnt what I'd moved here for.
I'm glad I did return in many ways, met lovely people etc & its confirmed in my mind the reasons I moved home last time still ring true for me.
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Old Jun 27th 2007, 5:06 am
  #135  
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Default Re: Anyone Else Feel They Are In Limboland?

Originally Posted by birdynumnum
sheer madness coupled with a shock at UK winters I think!!!!!!!!!
No seriously, to cut a long story short, I came back to try the area we'd initially meant to.
Although I had reservations on Oz, I came back to live in the area/live the life I'd initially migrated for, to live in a city wasnt what I'd moved here for.
I'm glad I did return in many ways, met lovely people etc & its confirmed in my mind the reasons I moved home last time still ring true for me.
I understand totally..I had been here before too..

Is easy to get the rosey tinted specs on about Oz when its cold and dark back home in winter..

now I couldnt care less..theres more to life than temperature (and skin cancer)
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