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It's flippin' dead on here.

Feel free to join in an ask for opinions on things, nothing too dick-ish but I have one that you can help me with, pertaining to holiday options this year:

Serengeti vs Masai Mara?

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Serengeti is much bigger than Masai Mara and has the Ngorongoro Crater.

Wildlife is otherwise the same. And Masai is still huge enough. Push come to shove, I'd go with Serengeti because of the Ngorongoro (note that the two parks are two parts of the same huge ecosystem, if you go to Masai you will likely drive slightly into the Serengeti as there's no hard border between the two parks).

But this is strictly between the two parks. For the larger holiday Kenya may be easier and slightly cheaper. If I had to chose between a holiday split between Masai Mara and Amboseli in Kenya versus Serengeti and Ruaha in Tanzania, I'd pick Kenya over Tanzania. The logistics of travelling around Kenya is a bit easier and budget friendly while Tanzania is ever so slightly more "bush" but not so much that the first time visitor would notice.

I'm off to Zambia in June myself. 12 days in the bush at South Luangwa then Victoria Falls. Can't wait!

BTW, when are you going?

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I knew you'd be useful for this. ;)

No idea on dates etc, we're just gathering information for a summer trip. It might be the worst and a total no-no for that kind of holiday, no idea yet. Could do a little tour and cover a few places. Just spit-balling at the mo but appreciate the information - seems like much of a muchness in terms of the what-you-see-on-safari level. :thumbup:

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Summer is a great time to go. It's not the same as the GCC summer, in Kenya/Tanzania August/September are part of the peak season, mild weathers, warm during the day and cool at night and early mornings. The high altitudes ensures this. But it's also dry so the animals come out of the bush to the watering holes and you see a lot more wildlife.

August/September is also part of the wildbeest migration in Masai Mara (earlier in Serengeti as they're moving steadily northwards). The wildebeest migration is amazing to see, especially the river crossings. It's always unpredictable as to when the wildbeest will start migrating northwards or make the river crossings, but you should certainly see the hordes.

Safaris are one of those things where the more you spend the more you get out of it. It's not the luxury camps (though they are decidedly nice) but better access, far better guides (which makes the world of difference), fewer people in your vehicles, the kind of vehicles you ride in.

Organising a safari for the first timer is daunting as there are so many variables and places and much of the market is dominated by middle man brokers (especially on the lower end). If you want to cut out the middle man and get straight to a proper safari operator, you can't do worse than Gamewatchers/Porini (https://www.porini.com/). They run their own camps in massive private conservancies adjoining the big parks in Kenya and have a fabulous reputation working with local tribes. Gamewatchers is the cheaper division of Porini but the quality of food and guiding and experience remains the same. An advantage of going with Porini/Gamewatchers is that they make everything very simple for you. Speak with their agents to create the safari you want, and make the payment and everything is taken care of from the moment you arrive in the country to when you leave. I think I only spent extra money on tips and two meals when I had an extra day in Nairobi.

You can do safaris more cheaply and it can still be a good time but there will be catches. Usually involves long overland transfers to the parks on bumpy roads, crammed into mini bus vehicles rather than open air safari vehicles, not so great guides (a key reason for why top guides are worth the money is because all the top guides know each other and relay critical animal sighting information to each other so when you're doing the drives through the parks, the guides are constantly relaying sighting information to each other).

Location-wise, for the first time safari goer you really can't do better than a week split between Amboseli and Masai Mara.

Keep the questions coming. Happy to oblige. I can talk more about the wildlife itself if you want. What do you want to see?

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Would you rather be an arse-faced weasel or a weasel-faced arse?

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Could never get by with The Office, thought it was really crap.

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Do you have any helpful advice for Scamp, Millhouse?

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Tough choice, Scamp mused.

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Yes. Go to Tanzania - more expensive, more animals and less people.

In all cases, don't stay looking at animals for too long. I got bored quite quickly.

If Kenya and you spend time in Nairobi let me know and I'll point you to some decent places. Mombasa (I'm told as not been) is a bit of a dump and full of sex-pests.

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Or go to Dubai Safari, at least you're guaranteed to see a few impoverished looking African Mammals.

And that's just the guides.

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Act my age versus carry on regardless?

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Carry on. I feel sorry for people who feel the need to act their age. Unless they are 7.

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Thanks.
Noted re; getting bored quickly.

Thanks for Nairobi.

I'm tempted to do Nairobi, safari, Zanzibar. Or something like that. Dunno. Still spit-balling.

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Carry on regardless

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Carry on regardless.

The only benefit of turning 30 is that I told an older man off at the airport. In my 20's I'd have felt too young and lacking experience to have told him what I thought of his queue skipping. Now I'm a fully grown man though....there'll be very few tellings off because frankly, I wasn't comfortable having a go and didn't really enjoy it. Not my style. I'm a tut and moan silently rather than confrontational sort.