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One for the Men !!!
Following TS's lead here - here you go guys - you can have a go at the ladies here.
I wonder who will post first...............hhhhmmmm |
Re: One for the Men !!!
Originally Posted by Jammy_Dodgers
Following TS's lead here - here you go guys - you can have a go at the ladies here.
I wonder who will post first...............hhhhmmmm Ice Fishing There was a competition between a team of blondes and a team of brunettes to see who could catch the most fish icefishing. Once the contest started, it was clear that the brunettes were going to win -- they kept pulling out fish after fish. Soon, the blondes got worried and sent over one of their team to see what the brunettes were doing differently. A few minutes later, the blonde comes running back. "A hole! You need to put a hole in the ice!" |
Re: One for the Men !!!
Good Effort!!
I half expected JC to light up this thread !!! Karma coming yr way TS |
Re: One for the Men !!!
Originally Posted by Jammy_Dodgers
Good Effort!!
I half expected JC to light up this thread !!! Karma coming yr way TS |
Re: One for the Men !!!
What do you call a room full of women, half with PMS, half with yeast infections?
A whine and cheese party |
Re: One for the Men !!!
[B]Ten Answers Men Would Like to Give to Woman's Questions....But Never Will
1 No we can't be friends, I just want you for sex 2 The dress doesn't make you look fat, its all that ice-cream and chocolate you eat that makes you look fat 3 You've got no chance of me calling you. 4 No, I won't be gentle 5 Of course you have to swallow 6 Well yes actually, I do this all the time 7 Of course I hate your friends 8 I have every intention of using you, and no intention of speaking to you after tonight. 9 I'd rather watch a porno 10 Eat it??? It took me ten pints to get up the courage to shag it. |
Re: One for the Men !!!
10 Eat it??? It took me ten pints to get up the courage to shag it. LMAO :D :D |
Re: One for the Men !!!
My girlfriend told me I should be more affectionate.
......................... So I got myself two girlfriends. Young Son: Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her? Dad: That happens in every country, son. First guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!" Second guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive. |
Re: One for the Men !!!
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we've got no hope then :(
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Re: One for the Men !!!
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Re: One for the Men !!!
Originally Posted by Benson
we've got no hope then :(
Our driving is better for starters! http://www.ahajokes.com/cartoon/womendrive.jpg lol |
Re: One for the Men !!!
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Re: One for the Men !!!
Originally Posted by Truth Speak
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Re: One for the Men !!!
As an extremely happily :rolleyes: married man i'd like to share this with you:
My wife dresses to kill. She also cooks the same way. -Henny Youngman ---------------------------------------------------------- My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met. -Rodney Dangerfield ----------------------------------------------------------- A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong. -Milton Berle ------------------------------------------------------------ I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, "There was water in the carburetor." I asked her , "Where's the car?" She replied,"In the lake." -Henny Youngman -------------------------------------------------------------- The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret. -Henny Youngman -------------------------------------------------------------- After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." The husband replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice." --------------------------------------------------------------- When your enemy steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. --------------------------------------------------------------- I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months - I don't like to interrupt her. ---------------------------------------------------------- My girlfriend told me I should be more affectionate. So I got myself two girlfriends. --------------------------------------------------------- A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report it since the thief was spending much less than his wife did. ------------------------------------------------------- Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished. ---------------------------------------------------------- A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" The father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying." -------------------------------------------------------- Young Son: Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of Africa, a Man doesn't know his wife until he marries her? Dad: That happens in every country, son. --------------------------------------------------------- Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; then it was too late. ---------------------------------------------------------- A man placed an ad in the classifieds: "Wife wanted." The next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same: "You can have mine." -------------------------------------------------------- A woman was telling her friend, "I made my husband a millionaire." "And what was he before you married him?" asked the friend. "A billionaire." she replied, ---------------------------------------------------------- Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience. ---------------------------------------------------------- It's not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems longer. ---------------------------------------------------------- Losing a wife can be very hard. In my case, it was almost impossible. ------------------------------------------------------ Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life Thinking they had no faults at all. --------------------------------------------------------- A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. ---------------------------------------------------------- A man meets a genie. The genie tells him he can ask for whatever he wants, But his mother-in-law gets double of what he gets. The man thinks for a moment and says,"Okay, give me a million dollars and beat me till I'm half dead." --------------------------------------------------------- Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They'v e experienced pain and bought jewellery. ---------------------------------------------------------- The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once. SALAMOO ALEIKOM :beer: :zzz: |
Re: One for the Men !!!
Originally Posted by iconoclast
As an extremely happy :rolleyes: married man i'd like to share this with you:
My wife dresses to kill. She also cooks the same way. -Henny Youngman ---------------------------------------------------------- My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met. -Rodney Dangerfield ----------------------------------------------------------- A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong. -Milton Berle ------------------------------------------------------------ I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, "There was water in the carburetor." I asked her , "Where's the car?" She replied,"In the lake." -Henny Youngman -------------------------------------------------------------- The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret. -Henny Youngman -------------------------------------------------------------- After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." The husband replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice." --------------------------------------------------------------- When your enemy steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. --------------------------------------------------------------- I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months - I don't like to interrupt her. ---------------------------------------------------------- My girlfriend told me I should be more affectionate. So I got myself two girlfriends. --------------------------------------------------------- A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report it since the thief was spending much less than his wife did. ------------------------------------------------------- Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished. ---------------------------------------------------------- A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" The father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying." -------------------------------------------------------- Young Son: Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of Africa, a Man doesn't know his wife until he marries her? Dad: That happens in every country, son. --------------------------------------------------------- Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; then it was too late. ---------------------------------------------------------- A man placed an ad in the classifieds: "Wife wanted." The next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same: "You can have mine." -------------------------------------------------------- A woman was telling her friend, "I made my husband a millionaire." "And what was he before you married him?" asked the friend. "A billionaire." she replied, ---------------------------------------------------------- Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience. ---------------------------------------------------------- It's not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems longer. ---------------------------------------------------------- Losing a wife can be very hard. In my case, it was almost impossible. ------------------------------------------------------ Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life Thinking they had no faults at all. --------------------------------------------------------- A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. ---------------------------------------------------------- A man meets a genie. The genie tells him he can ask for whatever he wants, But his mother-in-law gets double of what he gets. The man thinks for a moment and says,"Okay, give me a million dollars and beat me till I'm half dead." --------------------------------------------------------- Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They'v e experienced pain and bought jewellery. ---------------------------------------------------------- The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once. http://www.skyscrapercity.com/images/smilies/rollin.gif Hilarious! hahahahaha |
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