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-   -   Jeddah - safe for young single female? (https://britishexpats.com/forum/middle-east-60/jeddah-safe-young-single-female-631973/)

graduatetutor Sep 22nd 2009 10:19 am

Jeddah - safe for young single female?
 
I have been offered a post as tutor/governess to an 8 year old girl in Jeddah. I am a 22 year old British female - would it be safe? I don't know whether it would be foolhardy or an adventure to accept the post.

nottmbantam Sep 22nd 2009 11:36 am

Re: Jeddah - safe for young single female?
 
Safe as in what respect?

Safe for young woman to be here on her own?
Safe as in security and terrorism threats?
Safe as in hip and cool?

If you are tutor - I guess you will be living with the family? That in itself will be safe enough, but might lead to a sense of isolation? The compound we are own has quite a few women here on their own - mainly South African nurses, but there are also teachers on other compounds that here as single women.

Security across the country is pretty good, so no fear really on that one.

And if as a single woman, you don't get invited out to a shed load of functions, I'll eat my sandals...

graduatetutor Sep 22nd 2009 12:29 pm

Re: Jeddah - safe for young single female?
 

Originally Posted by nottmbantam (Post 7953665)
Safe as in what respect?

Safe for young woman to be here on her own?
Safe as in security and terrorism threats?
Safe as in hip and cool?

If you are tutor - I guess you will be living with the family? That in itself will be safe enough, but might lead to a sense of isolation? The compound we are own has quite a few women here on their own - mainly South African nurses, but there are also teachers on other compounds that here as single women.

Security across the country is pretty good, so no fear really on that one.

And if as a single woman, you don't get invited out to a shed load of functions, I'll eat my sandals...

I suppose I meant safe for a young woman to be there alone, though I will be living with the family. Do you know what kind of status a tutor would have? i.e. closer to guest or to servant? I think the thing that worries me most is the difficulty of getting out of the country if something goes wrong. As I understand it you need the signature of your employer in order to leave - what if he refuses to give it to me?

Desert Shaikh Sep 22nd 2009 12:43 pm

Re: Jeddah - safe for young single female?
 

Originally Posted by graduatetutor (Post 7953796)
I suppose I meant safe for a young woman to be there alone, though I will be living with the family. Do you know what kind of status a tutor would have? i.e. closer to guest or to servant? I think the thing that worries me most is the difficulty of getting out of the country if something goes wrong. As I understand it you need the signature of your employer in order to leave - what if he refuses to give it to me?

From the short time I have been in Saudi Arabia, things do seem safe for a woman.

Odd as it may seem, women seem to have more doors open to them than a single guy would. For example, a woman would be able to go to the mall without being stopped by guards, as is the case with a guy. In most malls, seating is reserved only for women and they can go into any resturants where there is a family area and will be treated with respect. These are just a few examples.

I would say if you have nothing to loose, give it a shot.

Nic1 Sep 22nd 2009 1:59 pm

Re: Jeddah - safe for young single female?
 
What is the nationality of the family you will be working for?

N

graduatetutor Sep 22nd 2009 2:33 pm

Re: Jeddah - safe for young single female?
 

Originally Posted by Nic1 (Post 7954016)
What is the nationality of the family you will be working for?

N

Saudi

Millhouse Sep 22nd 2009 6:23 pm

Re: Jeddah - safe for young single female?
 

Originally Posted by graduatetutor (Post 7954087)
Saudi

I would imagine that they would consider you a servant...

nottmbantam Sep 22nd 2009 7:39 pm

Re: Jeddah - safe for young single female?
 
My wife is a teacher at a local ( British ) School here in Jeddah, and there are plenty of opportunities for her to do some private tutoring ( out of school hours ) , and from what I've seen, private tutors do tend to be quite highly regarded, especially British ones.

A friend of hers got offered a summer job, private tutor to a Saudi family, who were going on vacation ( to Geneva ) and took the tutor with them. Eight weeks, full time, fully paid, all expenses covered. So, from my view, I don't think Saudi's will treat tutors as servants.

It's a fair point you have raised re the visa. You are correct, in theory, your employer sponsors your work permit ( residency visa ) and most large companies will also hold the passport of all their employees. It might be prudent to negotiate a get out clause, if things don't work out.

Aikman7981 Sep 22nd 2009 7:41 pm

Re: Jeddah - safe for young single female?
 
I have no knowledge relating to this young lady's question.

So I'll tell you what I think anyway: Do not do this. The ways in which this can end badly are many.

Bonny Boy Sep 23rd 2009 4:48 am

Re: Jeddah - safe for young single female?
 
Saudi is relatively safe for everyday living. (Apart from on the roads :lol:)

The only unknown is the family you will be working for. There are occasional headlines of maids etc being badly treated, but these are the exception rather than the rule.

As the nature of this job requires a closeness of living with the employer as compared with a regular 9-5 type job, you really need to meet with the family first if at all possible before committing.

If not that, at least a telephone conversation with both the father and mother. This is an entirely reasonable thing to request in the circumstances.

You will be living with the family I note, some thoughts:


Will you have separate private living quarters with your own key?

Will you have at least one day off per week?

Will you be allowed (female, this being Saudi)) visitors.

Where exactly do the family live - can you travel to social events easily on your presumed day off?


It could well be a great adventure, but you need to have your contingencies and fall back plans in place. The Employers approval to exit the country is not that unusual in this region. You could try and negotiate your way out of this in the Contract - but remember that as a last resort you could get yourself one way or another to the British Embassy.

Get everything you want, or are prepared to accept, onto a Contract before you enter Saudi.

lionheart Sep 23rd 2009 6:13 am

Re: Jeddah - safe for young single female?
 
You may need to ask if they have any teenage sons in the household. I know of a Swedish nanny who was basically used as a sex slave/tutor by a Saudi family. Personally, if you were my 22 yo daughter, I would do everything to deter you. Also check that they have a maid/cook as you may end up doing all the household chores. Working in a school is one thing but as a personal tutor in a Saudi household is something else, unless you know them well.

Nic1 Sep 23rd 2009 7:00 am

Re: Jeddah - safe for young single female?
 
Also ask if they plan to give you a multi exit/re-entry visa and whether they plan to hold your passport. With the former and without them doing the latter you can leave when you want.

Will a driver be around to take you out to malls etc if you want to meet with friends, will you be allowed out on your own ? Also check if you will have your own room or will have to share with the child you are tutoring, get a detailed idea of where your responsibilities end and start.

It is worth finding out, if you can, not sure how you'd go about this tactfully, how strict they are in their religion as this could make a huge difference to your lifestyle both inside and outside the house.

It's a tough choice, many many Saudis are educated, open minded, kind, generous people, but like in all societies there are extremes, and a very religious family at the extreme end could be very hard to live with imo.

It could be the experience of a lifetime, or a complete disaster. But isn't that true about a lot of things in life ?

Good luck
N

Millhouse Sep 23rd 2009 7:57 am

Re: Jeddah - safe for young single female?
 

Originally Posted by Nic1 (Post 7956353)

It could be the experience of a lifetime, or a complete disaster. But isn't that true about a lot of things in life ?

Good luck
N


True, but the downside here could be being raped every night by the husband and or sons. We are not talking about losing a few quid or not liking the heat.

I would tread carefully on this one!

Nic1 Sep 23rd 2009 9:21 am

Re: Jeddah - safe for young single female?
 
That's true, but I would hazard a guess she will be at no more risk of rape than if she backpacked round the world alone.

N

lionheart Sep 24th 2009 12:59 pm

Re: Jeddah - safe for young single female?
 

Originally Posted by Nic1 (Post 7956693)
That's true, but I would hazard a guess she will be at no more risk of rape than if she backpacked round the world alone.

N

But at least she can run. When you are locked in a bedroom, escape is not so easy.


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