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Hubby wants to move back to London from Dubai

Hubby wants to move back to London from Dubai

Old Mar 27th 2019, 7:21 pm
  #31  
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Default Re: Hubby wants to move back to London from Dubai

Also if you read my post he would be staying back in Dubai for ONLY a year at most in order for us to save up some money to transport our belongings back to the UK and hopefully find a secure job in London.
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Old Mar 28th 2019, 4:21 am
  #32  
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Default Re: Hubby wants to move back to London from Dubai

Originally Posted by Lul37
Millhouse that is unfair to say. I’m the one who’s agreed to move back to his home country despite being happier in the Middle East where I’m from originally. When I married hubby at just 25 years old, I left my all my friends and family to start a new life abroad in the UK. It was hard for me but I adjusted. Now I’m being forced to move back because he’s so unhappy over here in Dubai. Even if we downgraded, he would still be unhappy and want to move back to London, if not this year then in the next three years. I’m not going to ‘live it up’ don’t u worry, I’ll be too busy trying to be in catchment of oversubscribed secondary schools to go drown my sorrows at the local pub.
I was teasing ... obviously it will be rubbish for you. It will also be rubbish for him. I just don't see how its a good idea.
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Old Mar 28th 2019, 6:05 am
  #33  
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Default Re: Hubby wants to move back to London from Dubai

Originally Posted by Millhouse
the 7:15 from Whitton.
Shudder.

I used to get the 0715 from Southampton Central. Same people, same tables of four, same sleepers, same shit conversations, same suits, same ties. ****ing hideous.
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Old Mar 28th 2019, 7:34 am
  #34  
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Default Re: Hubby wants to move back to London from Dubai

Scamp Millhouse - I was considering to move back to London. You have set me straight and that idea is no longer an option.

Lul37 - Its not an easy situation to be in. Hope things work out. If I was not saving money in Dubai, I would move back to London where you have rights, family around, job stability, etc. Another poster mentioned downgrading in Dubai to save money which is one of your partners concerns.

Try and explain the following to your partner, 'Maybe the moon is beautiful only because it's far' or 'grass always looks greener on the other side'. I'm sure working life in London has its own issues which he can't foresee.

Good luck with whatever you decide.
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Old Mar 28th 2019, 8:05 am
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Default Re: Hubby wants to move back to London from Dubai

Originally Posted by Taz786
Try and explain the following to your partner, 'Maybe the moon is beautiful only because it's far' or 'grass always looks greener on the other side'.
all girls are beautiful after 10pints .Take to drinking.
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Old Mar 28th 2019, 9:20 am
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Default Re: Hubby wants to move back to London from Dubai

Originally Posted by Taz786
Scamp Millhouse - I was considering to move back to London. You have set me straight and that idea is no longer an option..
In fairness, I commuted so it was a shit show of a day every day....it just so happened to be in summer and I was made sort of redundant and only suffered the journey for 6 months (stayed employed with a different part of the business, walking distance from home, so lucked out really).

That being said, in your 20's, London would be sick, it's where the big firms are, it's where you will advance, it's where the money is. But now I'm the ripe old age of 31, the regular working visits there are great, but that's enough. The underground is hateful, the people are all ***** it's just so ****ing busy all the time. The quality of life is actually pretty low I think. I could transfer back probably but it would be working basically in the city. It's two changes to get to Waterloo (or a long walk and one train) and then 1h15ish to Southampton. Thousands of quid to stand on a train, thousands to park, up at 0530 and home at 1930/2000. Where's the fun in that?

The dream is a small or big business with free parking, lunch provided, happy endings on Fridays, relaxed dress code and a nice environment in a sensible place like Southampton or Bristol or Reading sort of cities. Big enough, but commutable and pleasant (they're just 3 examples in the South off the top of my head. There will be better).

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Old Mar 28th 2019, 9:43 am
  #37  
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Default Re: Hubby wants to move back to London from Dubai

Originally Posted by Scamp
In fairness, I commuted so it was a shit show of a day every day....it just so happened to be in summer and I was made sort of redundant and only suffered the journey for 6 months (stayed employed with a different part of the business, walking distance from home, so lucked out really).

That being said, in your 20's, London would be sick, it's where the big firms are, it's where you will advance, it's where the money is. But now I'm the ripe old age of 31, the regular working visits there are great, but that's enough. The underground is hateful, the people are all ***** it's just so ****ing busy all the time. The quality of life is actually pretty low I think. I could transfer back probably but it would be working basically in the city. It's two changes to get to Waterloo (or a long walk and one train) and then 1h15ish to Southampton. Thousands of quid to stand on a train, thousands to park, up at 0530 and home at 1930/2000. Where's the fun in that?

The dream is a small or big business with free parking, lunch provided, happy endings on Fridays, relaxed dress code and a nice environment in a sensible place like Southampton or Bristol or Reading sort of cities. Big enough, but commutable and pleasant (they're just 3 examples in the South off the top of my head. There will be better).
Good points and I would feel the same about London. No longer in the UK myself but I would assume that there are still many smaller cities in the UK that would offer the things you mentioned. I work in a city with population of around 80.000 and always had free parking, 2 of the 3 companies I worked for offered free lunch and in IT it's usually always relaxed dress code anyway. I usually finish around 4pm and home around 4:30/4:45pm (28km). I suppose it just depends what people see as quality of life but I would rather cut grass than be stuck on a crowded train every day. Others will of course think different.

Last edited by Moses2013; Mar 28th 2019 at 9:46 am.
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Old Mar 28th 2019, 10:27 am
  #38  
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Default Re: Hubby wants to move back to London from Dubai

I lived in zone 5. Worked in the city. 10min walk to the station at each end and a 25min packed train sniffing an armpit or if I was lucky to get a seat sniffing an asscrack.. Leave at 8. Home by 7... The only thing I really hated was the rain and the cold and the dark and the moaning and the food and the asscracks and the terrible bathrooms without mixer taps.

Dunno what separating for a year solves, he will be shored up in a one bed in JLT, she will be cold in some miserable mid terrace house while they save money. He will still be too busy on the Riyadh red eye to look for a job in London. A year becomes 18mths etc... The only real solution is cut the costs in dubai, get a new job and put the misses to work... Or fully embrace a move to the uk (or Ireland of course).
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Old Mar 28th 2019, 11:48 am
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Default Re: Hubby wants to move back to London from Dubai

Originally Posted by Millhouse
I lived in zone 5. Worked in the city. 10min walk to the station at each end and a 25min packed train sniffing an armpit or if I was lucky to get a seat sniffing an asscrack.. Leave at 8. Home by 7... The only thing I really hated was the rain and the cold and the dark and the moaning and the food and the asscracks and the terrible bathrooms without mixer taps.
That sounds like a lot to hate and I love the asscracks bit:-) We get our fair share of rain here too and especially winters can feel long cold and dark but I suppose it's a lot tougher if you have horrible surroundings + the commute. At least the evenings are getting brighter for us (yesterday was still bright around 7:30pm) and it makes a huge difference if you can drive along a pleasant country road rather than sitting in a horrible crowded train passing ugly buildings + the time you lose.

Last edited by Moses2013; Mar 28th 2019 at 11:51 am.
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Old Mar 28th 2019, 12:28 pm
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Default Re: Hubby wants to move back to London from Dubai

Originally Posted by Moses2013
Good points and I would feel the same about London. No longer in the UK myself but I would assume that there are still many smaller cities in the UK that would offer the things you mentioned. I work in a city with population of around 80.000 and always had free parking, 2 of the 3 companies I worked for offered free lunch and in IT it's usually always relaxed dress code anyway. I usually finish around 4pm and home around 4:30/4:45pm (28km). I suppose it just depends what people see as quality of life but I would rather cut grass than be stuck on a crowded train every day. Others will of course think different.
Amen to that. If I could get a good job (when I want to go back) somewhere like Salisbury where the old dear lives it would be perfect. Close enough to bigger things, close to the forest, close to the sea. It's just ideal....and as you say, there are shit loads of places like it.

Originally Posted by Moses2013
That sounds like a lot to hate and I love the asscracks bit:-) We get our fair share of rain here too and especially winters can feel long cold and dark but I suppose it's a lot tougher if you have horrible surroundings + the commute. At least the evenings are getting brighter for us (yesterday was still bright around 7:30pm) and it makes a huge difference if you can drive along a pleasant country road rather than sitting in a horrible crowded train passing ugly buildings + the time you lose.
After leaving the company that moved me to and from London I worked in Lymington. A and B roads for 18 miles out of the city and into the New Forest. In winter it was always dark but such is, in summer it was too early for caravans to be out and it was just the BEST commute in a zippy A3, sun shining, tunes on, fag in hand. Glorious.

Originally Posted by Millhouse
I lived in zone 5. Worked in the city. 10min walk to the station at each end and a 25min packed train sniffing an armpit or if I was lucky to get a seat sniffing an asscrack.. Leave at 8. Home by 7... The only thing I really hated was the rain and the cold and the dark and the moaning and the food and the asscracks and the terrible bathrooms without mixer taps.
Not too bad a commute but that 10min walk in rain is going to be hateful I bet.

Mixer taps. How the UK hasn't caught up with this is beyond me. I make a massive fuss of filling the sink with warm/hot water when I'm at Mum's. Having your options limited to scalding burns or ice bath is no way to wash your mitts post-poop.
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Old Mar 28th 2019, 1:56 pm
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Default Re: Hubby wants to move back to London from Dubai

Originally Posted by Scamp
Amen to that. If I could get a good job (when I want to go back) somewhere like Salisbury where the old dear lives it would be perfect. Close enough to bigger things, close to the forest, close to the sea. It's just ideal....and as you say, there are shit loads of places like it.
Salisbury definitely looks like a nice place and very close to Portsmouth if you want to take the car to France for a weekend. A lot of options available.
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Old Mar 28th 2019, 5:40 pm
  #42  
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Default Re: Hubby wants to move back to London from Dubai

Scamp ugh don’t remind me about lack of mixer taps, what is even worse is lack of shower bidets for us ME’s. Have to resort to begging the landlord to allow us to install one in our rented property, or install it myself in desperation behind his back
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Old Mar 28th 2019, 6:04 pm
  #43  
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Default Re: Hubby wants to move back to London from Dubai

Moses2013 may I ask where you are currently living since you also work in IT? Ps, hubby is a ‘Technology consultancy- senior manager’ not senior consultant, I obviously don’t know what the difference is!!
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Old Mar 28th 2019, 6:28 pm
  #44  
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Default Re: Hubby wants to move back to London from Dubai

Millhouse i also hated commuting to Central London from zone 5, and i only worked part time! But then again I’m not the one taking a flight weekly to KSA. He said he would definitely pick commuting in a smelly tube over that.

What moving back separately would solve the first year is around £3700 a month approximately since the rent in the Uk would be maximum £1500 a month for only 3 of us and hubby would be paying at most 45k AED (including transport I’m hoping ) a year on a studio near downtown.

Also as my hubby can’t think long term in Dubai, I’m concerned about my children esp my older son getting a fair chance to attend a decent secondary school. He would start secondary in September 2020. Which means we would need to not only be resident in London in October 2019 to be eligible to apply, but also in ‘catchment’. So that would be something to work on if I went back on my own first. Otherwise if we moved back while he’s in the middle of year 8 or above, I don’t know if he would get to attend a good school if they are all full up.
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Old Mar 28th 2019, 6:33 pm
  #45  
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Default Re: Hubby wants to move back to London from Dubai

PS: I have suggested we downgrade to 130k for rent and get a smaller car. Hubby still unconvinced that’s good enough. What is the basic cost of an average car over here anyway? Including the cost of insurance and fuel. Have also just been offered a part time position 3.5k a month (would be double that if I did full time). Still don’t know if that would sway hubby to stay but at least I’m trying
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