Homesickness

Old Aug 14th 2011, 11:23 am
  #16  
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Default Re: Homesickness

I'm guessing women suffer from homesickness more than men in general?
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Old Aug 14th 2011, 11:35 am
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Default Re: Homesickness

Originally Posted by Hello.Kitty View Post
oh, well, thanks for that then!

Seriously though, being homesick isn't delusional nor something to just "get over". As human beings, it's a fundamental, instinctive need to "belong" to a group or a community, rooted in pure survival instincts - often, if you were a loner, you didn't live as long as those who had a close-knit tribe (I guess this also applies more when you're a woman).
As such, you can't move on until and unless you feel secure in your new environment.
http://www.timlebon.com/maslow_files/image002.gif
Maslows heirachy of needs.. I remember doing that at Uni..

Homesickness is often a consequence of ones own insecurities in unfamiliar circumstances. I like new places and different cultures, so I don't tend to get homesick. Or seasick either.

Although, truth be told, I've probably had enough immersion in the KSA way of life. I'm not homesick for the UK though. Can't stand the petty minded ignorant self importance of the scummy place.
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Old Aug 14th 2011, 11:42 am
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Default Re: Homesickness

Originally Posted by irich View Post
Maslows heirachy of needs.. I remember doing that at Uni..

Homesickness is often a consequence of ones own insecurities in unfamiliar circumstances. I like new places and different cultures, so I don't tend to get homesick. Or seasick either.

Although, truth be told, I've probably had enough immersion in the KSA way of life. I'm not homesick for the UK though. Can't stand the petty minded ignorant self importance of the scummy place.
Love your patriotism , let's hope you're not caught up in a tin pot rebellion and need to return home then eh ?
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Old Aug 14th 2011, 11:52 am
  #19  
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Default Re: Homesickness

Originally Posted by kittycat1 View Post
I'm guessing women suffer from homesickness more than men in general?
Or maybe they are more prepared to admit to it? It can be harder for a 'trailing spouse' to settle than someone who starts a job immediately too.

I have never felt homesick.
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Old Aug 14th 2011, 11:59 am
  #20  
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Default Re: Homesickness

Originally Posted by co durham boy View Post
Love your patriotism , let's hope you're not caught up in a tin pot rebellion and need to return home then eh ?

"Patriotism is the last refuge of a scoundrel" Samuel Johnson.

I prefer:

"They live off the carrion of our mutual distrust and bribe us with symbols that equate hatred with manhood" J Brunner

The place I'd like to live is Costa Rica.

I don't read the Daily Mail and I find Sky News moronic.
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Old Aug 14th 2011, 12:07 pm
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Default Re: Homesickness

OK I have rethought my responce.

I think there may also be a big differnce between feeling homesick and hating Dubai, it takes a long time to adjust to this place and the work culture here and the people you work with. Its quite easy to get the two confused.

Based on the above I love London but would move somewhere else before moving home there. I know plenty of people who hated living in London whereas I loved it, and for all its problems I can't imagine ever settling anywhere else. Different horses for different courses. However I would live in other cities before heading home, but I would look at cities that inspire me more so New York, Hong Kong, Sydney(for the lifestyle) and would look at short contracts in more interesting countries. My time in the Middle East is limited I think- however a year ago I said 3 years was my absolute maximum and I now say 5 so who knows. If work is still shite then you go where the work is I guess.

Meow- really never ever?
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Old Aug 14th 2011, 12:57 pm
  #22  
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Default Re: Homesickness

Originally Posted by kittycat1 View Post
Meow- really never ever?

Honestly, never. I'm really not that cold-hearted though

I chose to move to Dubai as I wanted a change. My career in London was going very well, but I was bored and saw another opportunity. The transition was made easier by the fact that for the first couple of years I had to travel back to the UK every 6-8 weeks for business, but I doubt that would have made much difference.

I also moved around a great deal as a child and am very self-sufficient. Besides, these days moving overseas is a doddle compared to how it used to be. International air travel is comparatively cheap, as are telephone calls. There is instant communication via the internet - email and skype. Anyone who lived abroad over 20 years ago will confirm that it is so easy to keep in touch with people these days.
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Old Aug 14th 2011, 4:36 pm
  #23  
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Default Re: Homesickness

Originally Posted by irich View Post
I like new places and different cultures, so I don't tend to get homesick.
So do I - I've been an expat on and off for 2/3 of my life, but it still doesn't stop me feeling the need to belong.
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Old Aug 14th 2011, 9:58 pm
  #24  
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Default Re: Homesickness

I've been back in the UK (currently in between jobs) for 2 days not having been back for 16 months. I can safely say that I miss my friends and family, but I don't miss the country. At all!!

I went to Asda earlier to pick up some bits and pieces. I saw enough scumbags to last me a lifetime! Also what is going on in the heads of fat, pale women that make them believe they can wear leggings or god forbid denim hotpants?

And no I don't miss Norway either!
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Old Aug 15th 2011, 10:21 am
  #25  
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Default Re: Homesickness

Originally Posted by Blue Cat View Post
don't go back to the UK in your first year!! bring family and friends here, show them around they will love the place, it will make you feel great to be living somewhere they aren't and then you will appreciate it. It's tough we have all been there but we all get through it.
Bollocks!

I went home on my own for a long weekend after 3 months. Then again 6 months later for a fortnight.

If you are really homesick go home for a week then come back, there's your answer. If I hadn't gone home under a year it would have killed me.

Mental advice BC.
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Old Aug 15th 2011, 10:45 am
  #26  
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Default Re: Homesickness

Originally Posted by Spugsy View Post
Bollocks!

I went home on my own for a long weekend after 3 months. Then again 6 months later for a fortnight.

If you are really homesick go home for a week then come back, there's your answer. If I hadn't gone home under a year it would have killed me.

Mental advice BC.
not mental advise at all, I have worked with enough expats here to know what works, women are more emotionally attached, they go home see their siblings etc and think the grass is greener and they are more of a unit etc.
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Old Aug 15th 2011, 11:25 am
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Default Re: Homesickness

Originally Posted by norsk View Post
I've been back in the UK (currently in between jobs) for 2 days not having been back for 16 months. I can safely say that I miss my friends and family, but I don't miss the country. At all!!

I went to Asda earlier to pick up some bits and pieces. I saw enough scumbags to last me a lifetime! Also what is going on in the heads of fat, pale women that make them believe they can wear leggings or god forbid denim hotpants?

And no I don't miss Norway either!
+1. The UK is the Land of the Chip Eaters these days.

Most people confuse nostalgia for an ideal with the reality of life in the UK which is, in no particular order:

Taxes, unemployment, crime, petty minded officialdom, that unspeakable c*?t Murdoch, The dying vestiges of a tottering class ridden system, That other unspeakable A?*e Cameron, Leeds Uniteds decline and fall, the price of beer, wine, spirits, tobacco, petrol, fuel, VAT, the rip off price rigging, creeping authoritarianism, MTV and Gangster culture, declining education, poor diet, lack of individual responsibility, etc etc)

Longing for family and friends, that's a different issue..
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Old Aug 15th 2011, 1:03 pm
  #28  
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Default Re: Homesickness

Originally Posted by irich View Post
+1. The UK is the Land of the Chip Eaters these days.

Most people confuse nostalgia for an ideal with the reality of life in the UK which is, in no particular order:

Taxes, unemployment, crime, petty minded officialdom, that unspeakable c*?t Murdoch, The dying vestiges of a tottering class ridden system, That other unspeakable A?*e Cameron, Leeds Uniteds decline and fall, the price of beer, wine, spirits, tobacco, petrol, fuel, VAT, the rip off price rigging, creeping authoritarianism, MTV and Gangster culture, declining education, poor diet, lack of individual responsibility, etc etc)

Longing for family and friends, that's a different issue..
you see, that's the funny thing, when I go back, I just focus on the positive and strangely enough, there's a lot of positive (including the freak-show at Asda).

I've been back for 6 weeks now and have crammed nearly every day full of amazing things... In fact, there are only 4 things that I genuinely miss about Dubai:
- Mr Kitty
- Mr Kitty
- Mr Kitty
- eat-as-much-as-you-like buffets. (I haven't forgotten about the BE brunch, btw!)
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Old Aug 15th 2011, 1:51 pm
  #29  
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Default Re: Homesickness

Originally Posted by Hello.Kitty View Post
So do I - I've been an expat on and off for 2/3 of my life, but it still doesn't stop me feeling the need to belong.
Same here, if not more infact. In any case, I have always found home where I have lived and tend to 'belong' there. I settle in new places quick. I only ever lived 1 place I hated, and left after a year..got the folks to send me 'home' to finish school.

Where do you feel you belong out of interest?
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Old Aug 15th 2011, 2:14 pm
  #30  
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Default Re: Homesickness

Originally Posted by Paracletus View Post
Same here, if not more infact. In any case, I have always found home where I have lived and tend to 'belong' there. I settle in new places quick. I only ever lived 1 place I hated, and left after a year..got the folks to send me 'home' to finish school.

Where do you feel you belong out of interest?
I too, have always found home to be the place I lived. Downside is that I don't really belong anywhere, but that never bothered me in the least.
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