Sandboy

been offered a job there and just wondering if anyone has any experience ?

how much will a house with a maids room and a pool cost ? will I be able to buy Speckled Hen ? How are the locals, I heard the lasses will let you do anything for half a lager and lime and a Lambert and Butler ?

Thanks in advance

co durham boy

Great place and a great night out as well

Sandboy

can you shag in the taxis ?

britexpat76

Is it true that if you are fat and wear a mobile phone on your belt you are simply irresistible to asian ladies?

co durham boy

No but the brunch in the Market Tavern is good . 4 quid and as much McEwan's Best Scotch you can throw down the hatch

weasel decentral

its full of c-units I heard

Sandboy

gerrin, then down to Klute for bullfrogs and chinese takeaway ?

NorthernLad

Easington Colliery workmans club does pints for around £1.50 of you don't mind the commute.

Klute is still going and there is the 'champagne' bar at bottom of the Claypath for the Friday brunch experience. Home from home.

co durham boy

http://www.fatbuddharestaurant.com/ canny chinky as well

Sandboy

priorities in order - 3 season tickets ordered

NorthernLad

"...sets it firmly apart from all the other traditional Asian-based Durham restaurants in the city".

They have so much competition.

There is a Weatherspoons underneath Fat Buddha, that whole square is like a Roman arena on a Saturday night.

flares

decent cricket in't summer weather permitting

co durham boy

You're right there mate , it's spoilt the city center really . It used to be mental when the Miners Gala was on but that was once a year it's twice a week now .

You get most of the nutters through on a weekend from Sunderland and Newcastle and across the Pit Villages .

God knows what Tarquin and Timmy think studying law up at the Uni !

Bahtatboy

****ing newbies coming on here again, asking the same old friggin' questions that have been answered a gazillion times before. Go do a search you lazy twat. However, you've caught me with a few free minutes before I bonsai my maid, so…

For what its worth, it’s a well-known fact that there's **** all of interest between Leighton Buzzard and Edinburgh, save for a bit of nice countryside and a brewery or two. You'll be nigh-on 300 hundred miles from the pleasing home counties, and at least 2 hours from an average castle on a small hill that purports to represent Scotland's cultural centre. Some say there's a town about 20 miles north which is worth visiting, but its filled with bare-breasted men and often knickerless women who speak a foreign tongue, although they do have a reputation for being welcoming.

They don't do swimming pools there, but big puddles abound. There's a large bit of water that's close to freezing all year round, about a half hour's drive away. It may be worth a visit, not for the swimming but to view the pinnacle of industrial architecture and more boarded-up pubs per square mile than you can shake a stick at.

Polish maids go for about 5 quid an hour; you'll have to pay more to get them to dress up as French, and even more to get them to not dress at all. However, if you do have consensual sex with one of them, you don't run the risk of going to prison and your mates down at Durasti are unlikely to question your sanity.

All the villas were converted into proper houses while they were being built. Downtown Durham is more expensive than Dubai, but if you go out into the surrounding desert you can find pleasant oases that have flourished and turned the desert quite green. There are some nomads who have settled around those oases, and some have been known to be friendly on occasion. Although watch out for the ones in caravans, especially if they have short-legged, humpless camels called "Spot" or "Wolfie".

Durham is also known as the County of Palestine, but there seems to some confusion over that.

Some people like to think that it’s a free country. But by the time you've paid income tax, national insurance, vat, road tax, fuel tax, booze tax, council tax, a tv licence, a dog licence, a fish licence, a fishing licence, insurance tax and airport tax you'll be lucky to have 10p on the pound spending power.

If you can put up with the near-blistering average summer temperatue of 19.8 degrees C, cooling showers of precipitation 6 days out of 7, warm beer and Chinese takeaways that only serve food, then I'd say give it a go. What's the worst that could happen?

Cypselos

Chinky? Doner meat pizza from Pizza King on the bottom of Claypath is what you want post Klute. You don't want to go to the chippy immediately underneath, there's a bloke with one arm who threatens to kick your head in if you forget to pay for the ketchup.

Love

Tarquin.