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Confused... need advice

Confused... need advice

Old Mar 3rd 2009, 6:38 am
  #1  
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Smile Confused... need advice

I have now been in Dubai for 1 month. I left my family behind in the UK to see if I could make a go of it here. I got an out of the blue job opportunity through a friend, and decided to head down no questions asked. However, after leaving an environment of economic doom and gloom back in the UK, I see things pretty much the same here in Dubai. Fair enough, it is not that bad but the lack of transparency here is making me panic. How bad is Dubai's economy? I am renting a car at the moment, and I am reluctant to purchase just in case things go belly up. I am renting a room in a villa at the moment. In addition, I am very very homesick to make matter worse.

Question is how long should one wait to see how things unfold here before I decide to make a decision of whether to stay here or go back to the UK? I am due to fly out to visit my family in June, and if need be would be prepared to start sending my CV to agencies and employers before that time if Dubai implodes. Any advice would be great.
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Old Mar 3rd 2009, 7:01 am
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Default Re: Confused... need advice

Originally Posted by meonline View Post
I have now been in Dubai for 1 month. I left my family behind in the UK to see if I could make a go of it here. I got an out of the blue job opportunity through a friend, and decided to head down no questions asked. However, after leaving an environment of economic doom and gloom back in the UK, I see things pretty much the same here in Dubai. Fair enough, it is not that bad but the lack of transparency here is making me panic. How bad is Dubai's economy? I am renting a car at the moment, and I am reluctant to purchase just in case things go belly up. I am renting a room in a villa at the moment. In addition, I am very very homesick to make matter worse.

Question is how long should one wait to see how things unfold here before I decide to make a decision of whether to stay here or go back to the UK? I am due to fly out to visit my family in June, and if need be would be prepared to start sending my CV to agencies and employers before that time if Dubai implodes. Any advice would be great.
I would say if you have a job here then stick with it, no harm to get the CV out and about in the UK though,.
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Old Mar 3rd 2009, 7:24 am
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Default Re: Confused... need advice

I'd say to keep all your options open... send your CV out back in the UK, and if you get any decent offers, then reconsider - you've got a job here, so there's no particular rush... just a case of "better or worse?".

In my mind, you're doing the right thing by living lightly - carry on renting your car, carry on with your accommodation.

The lack of transparency weighs on my mind too... "things" are constantly going on and the fact is, well, we just have to live with it at the moment. Even in the UK, I've had friends made redundant (construction industry) and asked to take pay-cuts/ go part-time. You never can tell.

As for being homesick, I don't think there's any cure, just coping strategies. If you haven't already, get Skype up and running and use it. Mr Kitty and I spent hours on it - not necessarily having meaningful conversations, but well, if you maximise the window, it's almost life-size.

One thing that was a bit of an epiphany for me - before Christmas, I was feeling pretty homesick too - was that I should just stop trying to forge a meaningful life for myself and my family here and just enjoy the frivolity of it all. It's short-term, it's throwaway - you come here for a specific reason, achieve it and leave. It's mercenary, I know, but hey... it keeps me sane.

And then that ties in lastly with my last point - "Sanity Breaks". You need some. Maybe look to taking a day off either side of a weekend and get back home every 6 weeks or so.

I hope this helps!
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Old Mar 3rd 2009, 7:40 am
  #4  
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Default Re: Confused... need advice

and some people just aren't meant to be an expat...
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Old Mar 3rd 2009, 8:56 am
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Default Re: Confused... need advice

Originally Posted by Hello.Kitty View Post
I'd say to keep all your options open... send your CV out back in the UK, and if you get any decent offers, then reconsider - you've got a job here, so there's no particular rush... just a case of "better or worse?".

In my mind, you're doing the right thing by living lightly - carry on renting your car, carry on with your accommodation.

The lack of transparency weighs on my mind too... "things" are constantly going on and the fact is, well, we just have to live with it at the moment. Even in the UK, I've had friends made redundant (construction industry) and asked to take pay-cuts/ go part-time. You never can tell.

As for being homesick, I don't think there's any cure, just coping strategies. If you haven't already, get Skype up and running and use it. Mr Kitty and I spent hours on it - not necessarily having meaningful conversations, but well, if you maximise the window, it's almost life-size.


One thing that was a bit of an epiphany for me - before Christmas, I was feeling pretty homesick too - was that I should just stop trying to forge a meaningful life for myself and my family here and just enjoy the frivolity of it all. It's short-term, it's throwaway - you come here for a specific reason, achieve it and leave. It's mercenary, I know, but hey... it keeps me sane.

And then that ties in lastly with my last point - "Sanity Breaks". You need some. Maybe look to taking a day off either side of a weekend and get back home every 6 weeks or so.

I hope this helps!
If you want to make a go of it and get over the homesickness, I would STRONGLY ADVISE against this...

Going home at such a frequent interval will only mean it takes longer to get over the homesickness. I always reckon on going cold-turkey for at least 6 months, that should provide a long enough break away from your home country to see past the immediate hi's and lo's of a new location and start to see the positives that can be gained from staying put.

As far as the lack of transparency on what is actually going on here, I would agree with the rest of this... Keep renting the car and the room, do not get yourslef into a position that you cannot easily extricate yourself from...

And awra best, big yin... Haud gain' and ye'll get oan a'richt!!!!
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Old Mar 3rd 2009, 9:04 am
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Default Re: Confused... need advice

Originally Posted by TGFKASE View Post
I always reckon on going cold-turkey for at least 6 months
er... you do realise he's got a wife and small child in the UK?!

Bit of a tall ask, imo!
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Old Mar 3rd 2009, 9:07 am
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Default Re: Confused... need advice

Originally Posted by Hello.Kitty View Post
er... you do realise he's got a wife and small child in the UK?!

Bit of a tall ask, imo!
Get them over here... It'll keep her-in-doors happy and the tme can always be used to scout for possible apartments/villa's should you decude to stay...

Plus its cheaper for her to come here, than it is for him to go home, flights-wise...

As the great Steve Earle said, "Nobody said it would be easy, but it dont have to be this hard!!'
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Old Mar 3rd 2009, 9:11 am
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Default Re: Confused... need advice

Originally Posted by TGFKASE View Post
Get them over here... It'll keep her-in-doors happy and the tme can always be used to scout for possible apartments/villa's should you decude to stay...

Plus its cheaper for her to come here, than it is for him to go home, flights-wise...

As the great Steve Earle said, "Nobody said it would be easy, but it dont have to be this hard!!'
that was the debate of a previous thread last week - far more factors involved than just shipping bods out, if my memory serves (always debateable!)

Anyhow, fact of the current matter - homesickness and uncertainty.
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Old Mar 3rd 2009, 9:19 am
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hmmmm...nice
 
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Default Re: Confused... need advice

Originally Posted by Hello.Kitty View Post
that was the debate of a previous thread last week - far more factors involved than just shipping bods out, if my memory serves (always debateable!)

Anyhow, fact of the current matter - homesickness and uncertainty.
the OP has been a member of BE for 1,5 years...he's been out to Dubai before (and lurved it here), even has friends/relatives living here...so he could have gotten quite a good bit of information about what it is like out here...I am guessing the wife and kid didn't just fall out of the sky one day, so he knew what he was doing by leaving them behind...and his mother and sister if I remember correctly...and although he's said he desparately wants to leave the UK or else he would go insane, he just might be one of those people that aren't suitable to expat life, at least not in the shape that he is currently experiencing all by himself over here...
I really think it's not for everybody and there is nothing wrong with that...
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Old Mar 3rd 2009, 9:20 am
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Default Re: Confused... need advice

Meonline, sorry but why did you leave your family behind?!?
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Old Mar 3rd 2009, 9:41 am
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Default Re: Confused... need advice

Originally Posted by meonline View Post
I have now been in Dubai for 1 month. I left my family behind in the UK to see if I could make a go of it here. I got an out of the blue job opportunity through a friend, and decided to head down no questions asked. However, after leaving an environment of economic doom and gloom back in the UK, I see things pretty much the same here in Dubai. Fair enough, it is not that bad but the lack of transparency here is making me panic. How bad is Dubai's economy? I am renting a car at the moment, and I am reluctant to purchase just in case things go belly up. I am renting a room in a villa at the moment. In addition, I am very very homesick to make matter worse.

Question is how long should one wait to see how things unfold here before I decide to make a decision of whether to stay here or go back to the UK? I am due to fly out to visit my family in June, and if need be would be prepared to start sending my CV to agencies and employers before that time if Dubai implodes. Any advice would be great.
things aren't going to change here in the next few months for sure, despite the fact that the govt are claiming there is no recession here...so you may as well decide now whether you are prepared to put up with life apart from your family or not...

can't your family come out here? and how much of an effort are you making to meet people, which would surely help you to settle down...? expat life is very much what you make it...

MM, xx
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Old Mar 4th 2009, 5:53 am
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Default Re: Confused... need advice

Thank you for all your advice. I left the UK for economic reasons and a chance job opportunity in Dubai that came up. I worked my socks of for my previous employer for a promotion for 2.5 years but always ended up being sidelined as the company favoured more younger candidates who had less experience than I did. . At the time,Dubai seemed a good opening, plus there was a lack of quality jobs back in the UK . I send money back home to cover expenses that i could not meet but I hardly save anything here in Dubai. 40% of my income in Dubai is spent on sending money back to the UK. I am only marginally better off by moving to Dubai.
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Old Mar 4th 2009, 6:04 am
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hmmmm...nice
 
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Default Re: Confused... need advice

so what are you actually doing to try and have some fun over here...are you going out, have you joined a club,etc.... there are a few guys on here that play football every week, there's the quiz, lol....and there is a BE night out planned for next week...you have friends/relatives here, have they not introduced you to other people...
seems to me like you are focussing on the negative things, instead of looking out for positive things...moping around the house isn't going to solve anything, you need to make an effort yourself...
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Old Mar 4th 2009, 6:20 am
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Default Re: Confused... need advice

Originally Posted by meonline View Post
I have now been in Dubai for 1 month. I left my family behind in the UK to see if I could make a go of it here. I got an out of the blue job opportunity through a friend, and decided to head down no questions asked. However, after leaving an environment of economic doom and gloom back in the UK, I see things pretty much the same here in Dubai. Fair enough, it is not that bad but the lack of transparency here is making me panic. How bad is Dubai's economy? I am renting a car at the moment, and I am reluctant to purchase just in case things go belly up. I am renting a room in a villa at the moment. In addition, I am very very homesick to make matter worse.

Question is how long should one wait to see how things unfold here before I decide to make a decision of whether to stay here or go back to the UK? I am due to fly out to visit my family in June, and if need be would be prepared to start sending my CV to agencies and employers before that time if Dubai implodes. Any advice would be great.
We left the UK in September to escape the gloom like yourself. After only a few months I was binned together with most of the construction and property professionals in Dubai. Trying to find a job in this industry is impossible but we have decided to stay until the end of the year. Visa issues permitting.

If you have a job stick it out would be my advice, or go home to watch daytime TV, unless you can secure a job back home.

As for transparancy there isn't any you just have to get used to it. If you want the up side read the Gulf News, they don't report bad news or the reality.
What reccession?

As for homesick a trip home lifts you but every 6 weeks??? appreciate you are missing the family. Would your family come here, accommodation rents are falling or as they say here 'Re adjusting' etc etc, as for the car we are still renting although there are some great deals with all the expats going home. So thats your call renting also gives greater flexibility if you do decide to leave.

Either way good luck
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Old Mar 4th 2009, 6:49 am
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Default Re: Confused... need advice

remember u will get done for tax if not out for a whole tax year too
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